#abstract drawing
Contempt
I had never experienced the feeling of contempt until I was diagnosed with cancer. Anger flowed through me like a ragging river. I was allowed to roam but not far because of treatments. Chemo treatments kept me from going and doing a lot of things. I was house bound. I was sick and had to sleep a lot. They made me feel terrible. I was a strong person so I knew I could endure the possibilities of life or death, but I wanted to be free. I was so independent and able to do whatever I wanted. I had strength, security, and space. Now I feel like I am chained to my treatments and they hold me back. I want to be released so I can once more fly free and have the opportunity to live my life. Again, I am angry because I feel my life is now owned by something else where my choices are made for me. Will I ever be released? Will I be free once more? Will I be able to live my life the way I want to? These are my concerns and they are also what keep me contempt.
Temperamental
When I was first told that I had cancer – the word didn’t register. I sat there listening to the doctor and thinking to myself, “Who is he talking about?” There was no way he had been talking about me because I was living my life right. I went to the gym every morning, had been eating good foods, and took good care of my appearance. Yet, he was telling me that I was in stage 3, boarder line stage 4 cancer. I didn’t want to believe him, so his words were null and void as far as I was concerned. Everyone around me was upset and showing great concerncan Again, I thought to myself, “What is their problem?” I had been in the hospital for two weeks before my diagnosis, not knowing what was wrong, but it couldn’t be cancer – it just couldn’t! The next day the doctor came in to see me and make sure I understood what my treatment options would be. Then it hit me, he was telling me that I had cancer! I just sat there in disbelief. It couldn’t be – not me!
Hello there,
I just added the second set of emotional abstracts and drawings. I did these more than 10 years ago. Still working on more (lol). I plan on having the book done with drawings and other chapters of dialog. It has been a rewarding endeavor and I am still learning and drawing (better) than I think I ever had.
I hope that you enjoy the drawings and that they enlighten you to what an emotion can look like, especially, through the eyes of a cancer patient, survivor, or cured,
Thanks for the support.
Maria