#mansplaining

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after gaining a whopping 5 pounds (on my, then, 103 pound body) that I no longer “had the body of an oriental” and the whole reason he found me attractive to begin with was that I was “a white girl with the body of a pre-pubescent Jap girl.”

(submitted by anonymous)

[TW Sexual Assault]

When I was fifteen, a friend of a friend forced me to suck him off and then forced his fingers into me in a park. When my friend came to find me, he whispered “I would have fucked you, but I don’t have a condom on me, and only sluts with STIs don’t shave their pussies” in my ear.

(submitted by anonymous)

I once had a guy tell me that no one would ever love me as much as he did, that I wasn’t allowed to get nipple piercings because he liked me better innocent, that he would fix me, and that when I lost my virginity, he needed it to be to him. He told me that if I loved him, I would run away with him, and that despite the fact that we were not dating, nor had we ever, I was not allowed to have a girlfriend- but he was. He was my best friend— the operative word being “was.”

(submitted by vestigialvirtue)

[TW Sexual Abuse]

I once had a guy tell me that he wasn’t really cheating on his girlfriend with me, I was just doing a favor for him because what he wanted me to do was something his girlfriend wasn’t willing to do. And because of the sexual abuse in my past, I did it.

(submitted by anonymous)

I once had a guy tell me I was overreacting when I got pissed for him telling another girl to cover up because she was “asking for it” and that I should just suck it up when I am harassed in public because “that’s just how it is”

(submitted by anonymous)

[TW Rape]

I once had a guy tell me that in the short story we were reading in class, the 15 year old who was kidnapped and raped by 2 grown men was actually partially at fault because of the way she dressed. People keep telling me that we should date. I’m too afraid to tell them this story to show why I won’t, because they’ll know that I still sometimes talk to him and think I’m weak for forgiving him.

(submitted by anonymous)

BIRTHDAY FEET IGNORE“While I’m busy texting all my girlfriends about my super big birthday party, yo

BIRTHDAY FEET IGNORE

“While I’m busy texting all my girlfriends about my super big birthday party, you’ll be at my feet being ignored and listening to Femsplainers lecture about your dark and disturbing perversions.“


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you ever go on a website and get so bewildered by its existence that you have to upload it

mansplaining

ywhiterain:

mean-girl-dean-girl:

youre-only-gay-once:

youre-only-gay-once:

You guys weren’t kidding that 2008 spn livejournal post was literally where mansplaining came from

image

You can see history being made here

Supernatural is both a curse and blessing.

Feel free to use.

Feel free to use.


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When facts are used to contradict gender identity delusions, the trans supremacist must engage in tr

When facts are used to contradict gender identity delusions, the trans supremacist must engage in trans-splaining. Typical trans-splaining displays include wanton name-calling, victim-playing, and, most notably, threats of violence. In every case, there is no attempt to use a logical argument to refute any claim against their own position.


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tattooedsocialist:

Every time a cis man says something that anyone who saw the inside of a high school would know, I just respond, “We already know that, Chad. Why would you write an essay-long statement to tell us something obvious?”

You gotta shut that shit down.

misandristmoira:

cecaeliawitch:

femsolid:

Progressive mansplaining !

(And yes I did blur this poor dog’s face to save him/her the embarrassment.)

men have a vested interest in invisibilizing misogyny, don’t ever forget it

Poster for Siren School, being released in full color from @silversprocket! Get a free poster when y

Poster for Siren School, being released in full color from @silversprocket! Get a free poster when you buy the Zine. Art by Isabella Rotman https://store.silversprocket.net/collections/comicsandzines/products/siren-school-by-isabella-rotman-comic-book


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bananonbinary:

bananonbinary:

i will never forgive the internet for what it did to the word “mansplain”

mansplaining is a very specific phenomonon wherein a man who is NOT qualified to talk about a topic assumes he knows better than other people who ARE qualified, purely because of sexism.

sharing a fun fact you learned isnt mansplaining. infodumping isnt mansplaining. adding your relevant personal experience to a discussion isn’t mansplaining, (as long as you remain respectful of others’ experiences as well, but that’s always true). correcting someone who is objectively wrong and spreading misinformation REALLY isn’t mansplaining.

stop telling men that all of their interests and attempts at socializing are insulting and unwanted, your gender essentialism is showing.

Integral Video Works by Gystère Peskine

28mn of acab science-fiction, music videos, & green screen

While I may not agree with the mother from Miracle on 34th Street and her policy of “No Santa Claus” for her daughter, exactly what right does that give Fred/Bryan to tell her how to raise her kid?

Let me mansplain motherhood to you, says the single childless man.

Throwback to the time I made this humorous post and a guy commented and explained my own joke to me. By literally telling me what a vagina is.

YOU CANNOT MAKE THIS SHIT UP.

ghostpalmtechnique:

liskantope:

In internet / social media commenting culture there’s the sort of assumption that’s so subtly and almost ubiquitously present that I can only really put a finger on it in its absence. This almost-universally expected element for comments and statuses in an online context could be labeled wit I suppose, which is vague but I can’t quite think of any other single word or brief phrase that captures it. The expectation is present both in social media statuses and in comments under statuses or in many types of online forums.

The expectation is that whatever you’re writing, whatever point you’re making, is either very heavily serious/sentimental (e.g. announcing the death of someone close to you or deploring a tragedy in the news) or a commentary, either as part of the discourse or a relating of someone happening in one’s own life, which must have a sharp (and preferably somewhat original and non-cliche-sounding) point to it. There has to be some subtle degree of humor behind the point being made, at least if it isn’t a purely argumentative response to someone else’s view. There is typically some very minor inference left for the audience as to whatever broader point (political, personal, or whatever) the commenter/status-writer is gesturing towards. Things are never spelled out 100% bluntly and baldly somehow.

And the reason I’m having trouble describing what I mean in the above two paragraphs is that I believe this is ingrained in our social media and discourse culture as such a low-key undercurrent that I don’t consciously notice it the vast majority of the time – again, it’s more that I notice its absence at once on the rare occasion when it’s absent. Recently it’s been on my mind because I’ve been perusing a small online space where it’s conspicuously absent by (of all random things) gradually going through the archive of old For Better or For Worse comics on the website GoComics: occasionally there are commenters who post under these comics and there’s somehow a complete lack of attempt to be incisive or make a new point or do anything but straight-up explain the joke a lot of the time (hereandhere are typical examples). I’m oversimplifying over thousands of examples obviously but there overall seems to be a complete lack of “wittiness culture” in that space, and I honestly can’t think of any other online space I frequent where this is the norm – the closest I can come to it is the way boomer-age people often seem to act on Facebook (but the regular commenters under the FBoFW comics come across as quite young). I notice something similar on the Peanuts archives at GoComics, except that there are more commenters such that every day there’s exactly one featured comment available which on average is of only marginally higher intellectual quality.

I feel like I’m still not quite getting at what I mean very well, but maybe someone else knows what I’m talking about and can describe it better than I can?

Noticeable by the reaction to its violations, generally viewed as somewhere between “irritatingly pedantic” and “mansplaining”.

That connection hadn’t occurred to me and wasn’t part of the counterexamples I’ve been thinking of, but I think you’re right. It reminds me of an exchange I saw on Facebook a few years back (between millennials).

Unfortunately I don’t remember all the details of this, but one of my Facebook friends (a woman, although I think since that time they have announced a preference for they/them pronouns) made a status saying it was a mystery to her why she felt a certain type of body odor smell in a certain context pleasant even when rationally speaking she “shouldn’t” (the main detail I’m forgetting here is what precisely the context was, I think it had something to do with clothes?). A guy commented under her post with a decent-sized paragraph putting forth a scientific (biological) explanation for my friend’s preferences. He then wrote another parent comment of just one sentence essentially summarizing what he had said in the first comment (reading something like “Yeah, so I think the reason you have that preference is pretty much X”). Underneath those two parent comments, my friend wrote, “Thanks, I love being mansplained to.”

And I remember my main reaction being (1) how is it “mansplaining” to offer a scientific explanation in response to a post that was more or less explicitly requesting an explanation for something the poster thought was weird about herself – is a man automatically a mansplainer just by attempting to explain a felt experience from an objectively psychological level? And (2) it did come across as obnoxious somehow for the guy to write two separate comments, even if the second one was just one sentence reiterating the first one. Like, I couldn’t quite nail down something objectively obnoxious about that, but it came across as kind of gauche because… on Facebook we’re supposed to follow some broad baseline of incisiveness and wittiness and that’s obviously violated by the unusual lack of succinctness in writing two separate comments saying the same thing?

Well, I suppose that (2) has a lot to do with the answer to (1).

[EDIT: because I had a little time to kill (yay end-of-semester work suddenly being over!) and curiosity was getting the better of me, I actually went back through that Facebook friend’s wall and found the status/discussion I was struggling to remember, from three years ago. It’s an interesting lesson in how my memory distorts things over time: my above description of the exchange wasn’t mild or nuanced enough. First of all, the status was an assertion that my friend found male soap scents pleasanter than female soap scents. The proposed explanation was “men’s soap is designed to attract women and women’s soap is designed to attract men”. The status was less implying a request for an explanation than I remembered, though it had a subtly implied tone of “this is strange” (though in retrospect it seems my friend likely had some gender dysphoria). Also, it was in fact a second guy who wrote the second parent comment, affirming in one sentence that he agreed with the first guy who wrote a very modest paragraph. Still I thought that the second guy was a little gauche somehow to make a new parent comment rather than just liking the first guy’s comment or replying directly under it with something like, “Yeah makes sense” or “This ^”. It still felt like he was violating the unwritten rules of Facebook somehow and contributed to my friend’s feeling of being mansplained to. At the same time, I still say that it’s a bit of a stretch to be offended on principle simply by someone putting your psychological preference in an objective context like that.]

I can’t breathe correctile disfuncion!!

mean-girl-dean-girl:

youre-only-gay-once:

youre-only-gay-once:

You guys weren’t kidding that 2008 spn livejournal post was literally where mansplaining came from

image

You can see history being made here

Me: I totally understand his frustration, but…

Joe here: But you can’t blame him for his frustration

…. I literally just said that

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