Oda with a son headcanons.

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❥ His son is pretty good looking. His hair grows in a similar style to his father’s and though the style is almost the same, his hair colour resides in his mother’s. His facial features are quite soft, none of his features are too chiseled or sharp, soft and rounded is what they are. That beautiful cobalt to cerulean you see in the boy’s eyes? That’s his dad’s. He’s just a little above average looking, but the colour of his eyes is what makes him stand out.

❥ He (almost) always has a smile on his face [just like me haa]. No matter the situation or time, there is a smile sitting upon his face with those kind eyes. You can just see that smile grow and eyes light up when he’s doing something he’s passionate about. His son is driven by passion and nothing can stop him.

❥ He barely had to be taught about manners and how to treat others, everything for him is on instinct and he follows it. He treats everyone the same (even though there is that special someone he treats a [lot] little nicer). It doesn’t matter if someone’s being mean to him, it doesn’t bother him, in fact, he has too much heart for his own good. Though, it’s a different story if someone is bullying another person, he won’t stand at all for it.

❥ If he has someone he cares about, he’s the sweetest person ever. He just loves being close to them and nuzzling against them whenever. His excuse to snuggle is that he’s cold, which is half the truth (he just wants to be close to them). His body is quite long in height so there’s not enough blood circulation that gets around, causing his body to feel cold sometimes. If that same person he cares about is his lover, he’s cheesy. He’s the cheesiest person anyone could meet, but his cheesiness is absolutely adorable.

❥ His interests lie in caring for others. He’s supremely good with anyone or anything he’s take care for. Children, animals, plants, you name it. He knows exactly how they think and sometimes if he doesn’t see exactly where they’re looking, he tries his best to relate to get along with them better. With children, he just loves their laughs and how they play with him (since his stature is above average). With animals, how they nuzzle or don’t run from him, he loves interacting with “magnificent animals”. With plants, he’s just downright responsible.

❥ He receives his share in love letters and confessions, though, (if) he does have his heart set on someone, his rejections don’t hurt all that much. He thanks them for their flattery and explains how he feels about them, what he likes about them, though in the end he does say the words that say he cannot accept their feelings because he has another in mind. What they love about him is his intelligence, behaviour and charming face (and his soft expressions, too).

❥ How he spends time with his dad is pushing his interests in literature. His sense of passion came from his dad, so he tends to become interested in whatever his father is doing (ever since he was little as well). It’s often that his mother finds the both of them reading the same book in the living room with Oda sitting on the reclining sofa chair as he sits on the floor leaning on the chair. They usually read the same book at the same pace and talk about it afterwards; character developments; plot development and so forth.

❥ How he spends time with his mom is taking care of that garden he made for her on Mother’s Day and helping out with dinner in the kitchen. On Mother’s Day, he made sure that Oda took his mother out for the day as he worked his hardest on creating the most beautiful garden ever. All he can remember is the way her face lit up when he gave her a hug and said, “Happy Mother’s Day, mom. I love you so much.” He’s extremely helpful in the kitchen and he’s an amazing cook. He knows when and how much spices to add and all his foods are so flavourful.

❥ On his free time, he learns self-defence with his father. The exact reasons were never given, but there was no complaining from him. All that was told to him was, “In case anything happens in the future.” which did make him worry a bit if anything was going to happen. He just knows that thanks to his dad, he feels like he’s able to protect the ones he loves and cares for. [additional: Oda would never reveal his past to his son, even if questions are asked. He can’t bear the thought of his son finding out what he did when he was younger.]

❥ Overall, everyone loves his family. There’s nothing to hate about them because every single member has a huge heart and glowing personality. Oda is a supportive and encouraging father, always proud and never disappointed by anything his son could do (not that he would disappoint the father he loves anyway). His wife has always gave their son the love that he deserves and was always understanding to how he felt. His son is the best thing he could ask for, growing up to be the man he always wanted to be without all the difficulties and turned out to be his legacy.

I know that Bungou Stray Dogs WAN! is a series of shorts that’s supposed to be just fun… or nice… or cute (and it is)

Dazai: “If I had to go, I’d like to go out just as beautifully.”

But this scene (from episode 10) made me cry.

Dazai might have said that out of his suicidal nature, or as a joke, or to be poetic but with his expression; he seemed happy and sad in that moment. I know he is happy to be with his friends, the Armed Detective Agency…

But maybe there’s still a part of him that wished he could be with Oda, to share that summer evening with him, watch the fireworks with everyone.

If Oda was still alive, they’d be partners and be on the good side. Saving lives and helping people. And be happy.

Maybe he remembered how Odasaku had to go...As the sun sets in the last moments of Oda’s life, he helped Dazai choose a different path and be on the good side.

Isn’t that a beautiful way to go?

Just a little something to help you remember…

Most of Dazai’s best moments/turning points were during the sunset:

“The Armed Detective Agency will oversee during the twilight.” (Season 3, episode 11)

1. When he found Atsushi

2. When he first completed a mission with a partner

3. When he considered Atsushi’s idea to team up with the Port Mafia (meaning he’d face his past)

4. When his best friend Oda, died in his arms (and he decided to save lives and be on the good side)

• maybe he has a thing for the bright red orange hue (?)

oooops…

“People live to save themselves”

-Sakunosuku Oda

oh boy, do i have wonderful beast oda/odazai info for you all since this may just be my favorite chapter in all of beast. it clarified a lot about oda’s state in this au, and how sad it truly is, especially with all that dazai has done to ensure that oda’s safety is certain

before i start, this was initially intended to be a quirky little twitter thread that’s supposed to be kicked off with a badly drawn doodle of something meme. the thread was supposed to be about how wonderfully dumb odasaku can be and how annoyingly frustrating dazai is in the latest beast chapter… and then it slowly devolved into a crudely written essay about small discoveries i’ve made that most likely haven’t been pointed out before, so i recommend that anyone interested in either oda or odazai to check this out 

so i finally got around to reading the new beast chapter and seeing how odasaku constantly devalues himself and finds that he’s lesser than the average person is… sad. its been said that him and ranpo are the stars of the ada, every mission trivial with their cooperation, and yet he doesn’t see any of that. thinks he struck luck when it came to his entrance exam, which he specifies that it wasn’t as a result of his own skills. his inferiority complex is embedded so deep that despite his achievements, he doesn’t at all believe he has any worth as a human.

i’m just a tired, ordinary man like you could find anywhere. a third-rate detective, as unexceptional as a fallen cigarette butt on the road.

and his entrance exam was just like dazai’s: the azure messenger case, which we all know wasn’t at all a walk in the park. one mistake, and it would spell disaster for the city that the ada was trying to protect. no–not just the city, it would also mean the end of the ada as we know it. despite it all, he resolved it much to his own surprise, and it was all thanks to an “unexpected” gift. and that gift? who would it be other than from dazai himself? 

beast light novel ch. 3

(also, this is a shaky claim at best but I feel as if oda fully holds the capabilities to solve the case alone, but dazai knew that with odasaku’s persistent feelings of self-doubt, along with his lack of some of the vivacity that dazai held to weasel his way through to information, the outcome of success wouldn’t be guaranteed. and so, dazai lent him something to ensure his success)

and yet, oda is blind to see truly how much intellect and skill he possesses. he doesn’t realize how integral he was to the quest of the azure messenger, doesn’t acknowledge that without him these orphans would have either slipped into a life of crime, gone to a downtrodden orphanage, or simply passed away, and he doesn’t know that despite it all, he’s one of the purest characters in the story, even with the darkness that will forever cling to him, a reminder of the violence that marred his past.

not to mention that oda, in one way or another, effectively analyzed the current situation that they’re stuck in. he noted that if things currently go the way they’re going, no matter what akutagawa achieves, him and his sister are doomed. so, oda brilliantly decided to go after the port mafia itself to prepare for this possibility, and it’s nothing short of genius. and dazai plays along with this… because it is oda, after all. 

and everything dazai did, everything he sacrificed, it was all for oda.

now to the underlying tragedy of this chapter. take a look at this panel: 

ever since then, i’ve been making a living by solving requests that come to the detective agency.

i provide for the orphans

i drink coffee.

i gamble a bit on days off.

at night, i write a novel in the kitchen. 

that’s my life.

nothing unusual, right? you’d think that odasaku was satisfied with life, since he has everything he had ever wished for. but in all actuality, he still lacks one important thing.

and that’s friendship.

his words sounded so… empty. achieving ones dreams is but one aspect of life that brings one gratification, but doesn’t necessarily mean it would guarantee lasting happiness. (think of famous actors or celebrities that spiral into depression even after they’ve achieved their dreams).

in that panel, he says he cares for the orphans, gambles, and writes alone in his spare time, but not a word of spending time with friends… something he had in the root universe, something that was lost to him in this one.

and he says this all with his face blacked out, as if he’s somewhat implicitly dissatisfied (while the kid’s faces are present, not at all concealed).

with dazai, he found peace in a place where peace is rare to find. They both completely put their guard down with each other around, and dazai can relax his overly speculative mind with oda. and they understood each other, a level of understanding rare to come by. dazai with his dark jokes easily flies past oda’s ears because that’s what they are, harmless jokes. and oda with his blunt honesty, which dazai cherishes and never prods him for it.

dazai also saw things in oda that oda was blind to. dazai saw a world of beauty in oda, the ray of light beneath a cloudy sky. he saw both intelligence and wisdom, kindness and generosity. and most of all, he trusted oda, despite dazai’s natural inclination to distrust.

and what oda saw in dazai was vulnerability. despite the front that dazai puts, he can be kind, even empathetic, when the situation calls for it. dazai once gave akutagawa a decision to turn his back against dazai’s offer to join the port mafia, when logic points to the fact that he didn’t have to, but wanted to.

dazai also consistently gives atsushi words of advice and shows understanding when dazai was under no obligation to, such as atsushi facing the loss of his previous caretaker. dazai gave atsushi genuine advice, not laced with any malice or ill intent. dazai had even left atsushi to grieve alone, fully understanding that atsushi needed to pour his emotions out in private. there’s more than enough instances of dazai showing this side of himself in both the light novels and manga, but it seems to sometimes be brushed aside. even though the main cast of characters always dismissed this side of dazai, oda has always known that this side of dazai was his truest self.

oda and dazai also talked endlessly about trivial things, calling each other daily for two hours for no reason other than that they each enjoy one another’s company. it’s pure, wholesome love. they had a mutual trust and understanding between one another, which ango, another friend of theirs, severely lacked in his friendship with them.

oda’s dream was to write, gone unfulfilled in the root universe, but he died happily knowing that the one he cares for is living in the path of light. dazai’s was to find a reason to live, which he found in oda, and continues to use this as motivation long after oda passed.

in beast, dazai’s dream was cut short, ultimately leading to his demise at the end. after all, his one reason to live is now robbed from him. however, oda’s dreams have become a reality, but can one really say he achieved happiness? he has the orphans, his children, but they will never understand him like dazai had. he has peace, but is it the form of peace he wanted? spending time alone, on things like gambling, while endlessly mulling how he has no one to spend this time with?

and writing, his one true wish that dazai made absolutely sure to make a reality. but was it worth it, at the cost of a friend who brought happiness and reprieve when everyone else failed to?

i thought of this tale as a matter of equivalent exchange, you lose one life in exchange for another. the scales do remain somewhat balanced, but not over a matter of lives. it’s over a matter of personal sacrifices, ones only known to us readers.

and i say “somewhat” because in the root universe, dazai remembered oda when he was alive, so well that dazai can recall memories to near perfection. but oda had completely forgotten dazai in beast, chasing after absent memories and deluding himself into thinking his life is perfect, while numbing himself from the aching hole of loneliness that consumes him inside.

also, oda is surely happy spending time with the children, but what about his lonesome hours? who is he going to spend that time with, in a world without dazai, the only person who understood him and his oddities?

ah, and remember this moment in the root universe? 

now, take a look at this again. no, look closer 

odasaku wasn’t merely gambling for the sake of it, he was gambling on a horse race.and before dazai was arrested in the root universe, he was seen doing just that. 

now, why would odasaku do this? he surely doesn’t seem the type to gamble away his money on something as silly as horse races, because what does someone gain while they pour their money into something so senseless? 

and the only reason i could arrive to is that dazai must have dragged him along to one. dazai is a port mafia executive, with more money than he knows what to do with and a boatload of depression. money probably disinterests him as much as life does, and he used gambling to kill two birds with one stone: ridding of money he doesn’t need, and distracting him from his boredom (and depression). 

and it doesn’t end there. remember when dazai in dead apple had visited bar lupin to pay his regards to odasaku, while reliving a pleasant memory dazai had with him? and he did this because he was preparing for a quest that may result in with the loss of his life, psyching himself up for what’s to come. this is probably bordering on speculation, but i believe that that’s precisely what he did once again in the horse races. dazai paid a visit to a place that oda and him had frequented, to prepare for another dangerous quest. 

also, note that immediately after exiting bar lupin in dead apple, dazai was confronted by ango, which kicked off the start of dazai’s plans. a similar thing happens in the manga, dazai spending time in a place that he and oda had gone to, this time the horse races, and his plan whirls into motion as jono arrests him. i think these similarities are deliberate, in order to establish their significance to dazai and oda. 

this long winded explanation’s purpose was only for me to go back to this panel once again, and say that everything oda spoke about doing, from spending time with his kids, to brewing coffee, to betting on horse races, and to writing in the kitchen, were all moments he had with dazai. 

and see that he has an extra chair that sits unused in the kitchen? at first, i thought it was there for the sake of being there. then, it slowly dawned on me that odasaku and dazai had noted in the dark era light novel that they made a habit of visiting each other, so it wouldn’t be illogical to conclude that it was a chair meant for dazai. a place where he can spend some private moments together with oda underneath the dimly lit kitchen, drinking in the scent of odasaku’s coffee and talking about things that distracts them from their troubles while odasaku whittles away at his manuscript. 

and one last thing before i end this out of sheer laziness, take a look at this photograph of oda from the final moments of the beast light novel.

as oda stated in the manga and light novel, he worked on his manuscript alone in the kitchen… but in the photograph, he wasn’t alone. he’s posing for a picture. relaxed, poised, as if entertaining the one taking the photo. and besides, wasn’t it dazai who insisted on taking photographs in bar lupin with ango and oda in dark era? he must have done the same in that very moment in the beast universe, but this time in anticipation of oda forgetting him. 

in the end, it seems oda and dazai left each other in similar ways, foolishly believing they’ve sacrificed their lives for each other to better the other’s life, but all they did was create worlds where the feeling of happiness will be lost to both respective parties, while also resigning each other to a life of loneliness.

they’ve forgotten about their one happiness that stems from just being around one another, listening to the soothing tune of jazz playing softly as they talk into the night, the world lost to them as they’re absorbed in one another’s presence.

it seems like their story is a tragedy of what happens when you love someone too much, to the point that you delude yourself into thinking you’re but a tool for their happiness, and with you gone, nothing will change.

but things did change, didn’t they?