#stephanie meyer

Minél jobban szeretsz valakit, annál kevésbé bírsz ésszerűen viselkedni.

I know we poke fun a lot at men writing women (and often with GOOD reason) but I’d just like to take a moment to look at women writing men:

• Muscles for days. It doesn’t matter if he’s sixteen and is a band kid whose hobby is skipping PE, if he’s a love interest, that boy has a six pack for some reason. Every man is lean but muscular and always have that perfect V. Six packs are free and you can see them through every and any tshirt.
• Always tall. Like, we can never honor a 5"5 King. Every dude is like 6 feet plus. Even when the woman is tall, the guy is always taller.
• He’s always so much bigger and his hands always dwarf hers. Like, every man has hands the size of dinner plates.
• Penises are always like 8(+) inches. He’s always the biggest she’s ever had and he is a Sex God, where he was a virgin or a vampire with a love life that dates back into the 1500s. He will make her cum 26 times, often with words alone.
• He’s the most poetic fucker you’ve ever met, even if he’s never read a book or watched a romance in his life. He’s going to spout out how she is the last star in a galaxy of loneliness that lights the sole path to his salvation. He’s gonna freelance that shit like it’s nothing.
• He will automatically never find anyone else attractive ever again, even platonically and if he does, he will compare them to the love interest in a way that makes her better. “Joanne had nice eyes. Not like Kelly’s eyes though, which were emeralds polished to a shine that made him think of summer and the fondest of childhood memories in the forest under a sky of jade leaves. Joanne’s were, like, ordinary blue or brown or something.”
• He always smells like things that you don’t even know had a smell. “He smelled like sunlight and cloudless blue skies, of cool winter frost and magic sex musk”
• He’s a douchebag to everyone but the love interest. She makes him a better man. (Ah, the good old “I can fix him” mentality in motion)
• He can eat cupcakes, pizza and beer for breakfast every day of his life and he will never have an extra ounce of flesh anywhere.
• He will randomly quote Shakespeare or Charles Dickens or, I dunno, Julius Caesar
• He always thinks her vagina tastes like rose petals and peaches and strawberry milkshakes
• He is constantly witty and charming and every women who seems him thirsts for him and his six pack and 12 inch schlong but only Kelly will ever catch his eyes and he has never loved anyone as much as he loves her. All other women can catch fire including his mom and he probably wouldn’t notice if it meant one last kiss from Kelly.

Sometimes I read or watch a piece of media and I don’t like one of the characters, so I… Get over it.

Sometimes I meet someone and they like a piece of media that I hate and I think… This is something that we don’t have in common.

Sometimes something I read or watched goes in a completely different direction from how I wanted it to and I no longer find the premise or plot appealing and so I … Stop spending my money and time on it.

Sometimes I… Let go of the things I don’t enjoy so I can spend my money, time, and attention on the things I do like.

It’s a wild good time. I think everyone should try it.

Okay this question has been nagging me since a month.
How the fuck was Edward able to impregnate Bella??? like HOWWWWWWWWWW???  like i get that Bella was a human so she produced the eggs, but for fertilization you also need sperm.
that means Edward ejaculated
And if it is possible for male vampires to produce sex cells
That means its possible for female vampires too
Then why don’t vampires procreate????
And in twilight it was mentioned that vampires like really dont have ANY blood when they are killed it looks like bricks fucking fell down and they need to be burned
so if vampires dont have any blood
how the fuck did edward have a boner?
like not having flowing blood or any blood is okay and still being strong is okay if they are like rock hard and shit.
if he doesn’t have any blood he shouldn’t even be fucking moving then how did he manage to do it ENOUGH to get her PREGNANT???????
Also,
HOW the fuck did he have a boner????????????
AND he ejaculated
AND his cum had sperm in it
HOW the fuck is his body being able to produce sperm
not to mention he like died in 1918 at the age of 17 so he’d be like 80-90 yr old when they were fucking.
I NEED ANSWERS STEPHENIE MEYER.

why do I do this to myself?

Gimme answer - @stepheniemeyer 

I’ll have to look over the drafted chapters I’ve written cause there’s guaranteed tired spelling mistakes, but I like how it came out! Next is New Moon! 

I can’t wait to talk about twilight 24/7 bc it’s culturally relevant again & no one can say anything about it

watching the Twilight Saga from Breaking Dawn Part 2 to Twilight is still amazing and goddamn tear jerking as watching it in order!