I know I have a few girls under the age of 17 following me. I’m not a role model so please

I know I have a few girls under the age of 17 following me. I’m not a role model so please don’t follow me as one. I’m too old for that shit if I could say anything when you DM me is:
1. Don’t have sex in high school. Boys will break your heart. You’ll have sex anyway.
2. We are too emotional to understand anything that time of month.
3. One parent will end up gay maybe both but that’s ok because they love you anyway and I was raised by gay men so there. My mom is awesome too.
4. Don’t listen to anything I just said.
5. Drinking makes you fat but try it anyway if you’re not driving. Uber, girls. Damn. You’ll feel like an idiot the next morning.
6. Only stay sad for two days. No one fucking cares. Toughen up.
7. Get a detachable shower head. You’ll thank me later and no I won’t explain.
8. Don’t get a boob job. They naturally come at 25… or they don’t. Whatever the case, they’re overrated.
9. Exercise for peace of mind not just for your waste line.
10. Also, this is coming from a woman who is rarely attracted to men so maybe ask a straight woman.
11. I don’t like a lot and stick to business so I don’t deal with emotions too well.
12. Stay in school and get a trade. College is so fucking expensive and you won’t find a job anyway unless your parents know someone.
13. Stick with your gifts. Those will be your escapes and maybe your money maker.
14. Don’t listen to anyone but yourself. Including me.