KANEKO’S CRIB NOTES XXXVII: KAZUMA KANEKO Shin Megami Tensei is a series that’s trul

KANEKO’S CRIB NOTES XXXVII: KAZUMA KANEKO

Shin Megami Tensei is a series that’s truly occult, by all definitions of the word. But chief among its mysteries are the origins of its artistic superstar, Kazuma Kaneko. An absolute enigma, Kaneko’s personal history and the current status of his employment at Atlus are closely-guarded secrets, much to the chagrin of hardcore fans. However, recently unearthed evidence has suggested the unthinkable: That Kaneko himself may be Cribbed from ancient sources.

Previously, KCN featured Arahabaki and the dogu sculptures from Japan’s ancient Jomon era. Above on the left is another Jomon artifact, a clay head that dates to the Late Jomon period (1500-1000 B.C.). It was found in Shidanai, Iwate prefecture in northern Japan along with fragments of its body; if intact, the completed figure would have been over 3 feet tall, the largest ever found from the Jomon. Of course, the most astonishing thing about the head is its striking resemblance to Kaneko.

There have been two theories to explain this uncanny similarity. The more popular states that the head “finally and indisputably proves that Kaneko is descended from the ancient inhabitants of the Japanese islands.” The likeness, therefore, is merely a matter of Cribbed genetic traits passed along generations; Kaneko’s indigenous habitat of Japan could also then be explained as a historic cultural tradition. The other theory, less universally accepted yet with a handful of ardent proponents, argues that Kaneko’s parents became fixated on the clay head before their son was born, copying the clay head’s features and thus influencing Kaneko’s physical appearance in utero.

A more controversial theory was put forward by noted bananaologist and ancient astronaut theorist John Pinkas. To Pinkas, the clay head represents not an archetype for Kaneko, but a representation of Kaneko himself: “The mainstream scientific view is that the Jomon-era clay mask merely proves that Kaniko [sic] is Japanese. In my view, this overlooks the possibility that he was actually present during the Jomon period, and that the mask represents an ancient Jomon artist’s depiction of his face.[…]I am not suggesting time travel, but rather that [Kaneko] is an Extraterrestrial Biological Entity (E.B.E.) with presumed immortality who, over the millennia, imparted Japan and other ancient civilizations with knowledge of art and art forms.” Pinkas also draws attention to this imagewhich to him “depicts Kaneko in his true form as an extraterrestrial being.”

But the truth is, until Kaneko himself comes clean, we may never know his real story. Whether he is actually Japanese, the image of an ancient face, or not of this planet is up to personal interpretation. The only guarantee is that this 3000+ year old clay head will cause controversy for many years to come.