#love queue you love
I feel like they’re doing a really great job of showing us just how much of an oddity Porsche is in the world he’s suddenly surrounded by. At first they were using humor but with this last episode they also showcased it in a much more somber way. The main thing being that Porsche has like zero ability for subterfuge. He wears his heart on his sleeve and his thoughts are written across his face, he can barely be sneaky to save his life. Everything he says and does is authentic Porsche.
I think that’s part of what Vegas is trying to use to his own advantage, I think he has clocked the same thing as Papa Korn. You can’t buy Porsche’s loyalty, you have to earn it. But once you do he would do anything for you. You can put a near absolute trust in him because not only would he never betray you or be turned against you but he doesn’t have the ability to hide it if he did. I feel like in a way Vegas is trying to idk… manufacture what’s happening between Kinn and Porsche organically. Not like trying to copy it but like he’s trying to I guess get there first?
He’s obviously enjoying the fact that it’s bothering Kinn but that bike ride made it feel like he was trying to bond with Porsche more than anything. Maybe to an extent it’s genuine interest but it just seems odd that suddenly he’s putting more effort into creating a friendship with Porsche. And like I said he seems intrigued the same way that Kinn is to have this person dropped into their world that has none of the tact or skill for deception that seems like second nature to everyone else around them.
When Kinn and Vegas are having their verbal sparring match at the table, Porsche is just sitting there between them with no fucking idea what’s happening. And then it’s like… wanna spike your new boss’s drink with wasabi? Nope, you’re gonna out yourself and end up drinking it instead. Wanna have a sneaky smoke break where you’re not supposed to? Na, you’re gonna start a fire and set off the sprinklers instead. Wanna have a fun night with you’re friends and pretend like nothing is wrong? Nu-uh, it’s gonna be written all over your face that you’re upset. Wanna convince your new boss to watch a little porn? Nope, his brother is gonna walk in and catch you so you have to ninja roll over the back of the couch to hide from him.
It’s not just him trying to be sneakier than he has the skill for but also the way he just… says what he means. From accidentally mumbling about Kinn and his friends being asses to straight up telling Papa Korn that he’s not doing well to telling Kinn he’d rather die than be a bodyguard and yeeting himself off a boat to telling Kinn that he was very happy with him seconds ago. Hell he couldn’t even have a random hook up without it being clear as day how uncomfortable he was.
Porsche is an open book, he feels what he feels unapologetically and that’s got to be so refreshing to Kinn. To feel like when you’re around this one person you don’t have to be on the look out for signs of betrayal, you don’t have to guard your every thought and every word that comes out of your mouth. I can’t even imagine what it’s like to be in Kinns position any given day but especially what it must be like to suddenly have someone like Porsche in his life. It’s no wonder that he’s so enamored by him. Plus, I mean he does look likethat.
I guess my point is that Porsche is the definition of a cinnamon roll, too good for this world. Too pure. And I will not hesitate to cut a bitch if they try to hurt him.
I am 86% sure that Kinn knows that Porsche is bothered by much more than the punishment. I just rewatched their scene in Ep5 after Porsche returns from Yok’s bar, and if you follow their conversation closely, I think the truth of it comes out just from how they respond to one another.
Porsche: “At least they’ve done me no harm.”
Kinn: “Are you saying that I’ve hurt you?”
Porsche: “Or have you not?”
Kinn: “Don’t you forget. Your life is mine. I can do whatever I want.”
Porsche: “Then go ahead. C’mon. Do it.What are you waiting for?”
*Cue Kinn leaning in and pulling back just before their lips touch*
At surface level, they’re talking about the punishment. But the fact that Porsche tells Kinn to “do it” and “What are you waiting for?” proceeded by Kinn leaning in close makes me think that Kinn knew exactly what he was talking about. A dare of sorts. “What are you waiting for?” = “I dare you to try to violate me again.”
I also think Kinn began to sense his resolve melting under Porsche’s gaze (coincidentally, the very thing he’s been hardening himself against) and leaning in was a challenge to himself, of sorts. Through it, he is simultaneously telling Porsche that he is nothing special to him, while also trying to convince himself of the same thing. Byclosing the space between them, Kinn is confirming that he knows what this is really about: how Porsche feels violated. He is acknowledging what happened between them and re-asserting (to himself, mostly) his control over Porsche–when really we, the audience, know that it is the other way around. Porsche has Kinn in an emotional chokehold, and if he could see that…well, I can only imagine how thatconversation would go. (I mean, can you imagine what Kinn would’ve done if Porsche would’ve closed the space between them? The man’s entire world would be rocked.)
So, yes. I think Kinn knows. But nobody wants to be the first to bring it up verbally, so they’re just trapped in this tense dance around the subject.
I really liked that like Jao is allowed to have desire and *be* desired. Not only bc he’s like got body issues but also bc he’s cute and quite often if his character archetype is engaging in sexual activity then they are a reluctant participant and Jao is not.
Jao gives enthusiastic consent (a thing scoy is big on) and knows what he’s doing, quite often the characters who are given the “cute” role are shown to be completely clueless about sex and so innocent that they don’t even know what it is. He picks up what Sky is putting down and is all for it.
I like that this show acknowledges that these characters are like in their early 20s and are not children.
the scenes where kinn and porsche are trying to hook up with other people was actually cinematic excellence. i did not expect it to be pulled off so well but boy did they Deliver. the franticness of kinn trying to force porsche out of his head, while trying to subconsciously recreate their first time by pushing his boy toy against the window with a view. choosing a guy who was similarly dressed to porsche. kissing down his chest and turning him around. and then catching his own reflection in the glass, the same way he did in the last episode - and knowing that it was all wrong.
interspersed with the same desperation of porsche trying to hook up with the girl the way he used to, except he can’t get kinn out of his head and can’t get it up anymore. nevertheless still reeling from his feeling of hopelessness, abandonment, and heartbreak. both of them coming to the same realisation at the same time that, oh god, there is no turning back. i don’t recognise myself. i recognise myself too well. i wish I could go back. i feel like if I went back I would die. i miss how things used to be. i can barely remember the me from before. i look into the mirror and see a ghost. i haven’t truly known myself until now.
