#alex russo
credits @peraltiagst on twitter
alex: i just wanna know why my clothes only get caught on the door handle when i’m in a bad mood.
alex: i accidentally showed some weakness earlier today, it was disgusting. i would not recommend.
alex: studies show that i literally did not ask.
alex: i’m sorry to anyone i’ve offended. if i haven’t offended you yet, please be patient since i’m getting to you shortly.
alex: i was like, i’m gonna wake up early and do things!
alex: i did not wake up early.
alex: i did not do things.
alex: guess who got shit done today!
alex: not me lmao but congrats to somebody out there
alex: oh, so now i’m “bad” just because i’ve done bad things in the past, continue doing so in the present, and will likely do so in the future?
alex, normally: fuck capitalism. it’s a rigged system that keeps people poor and it isn’t fair. you shouldn’t need to work three jobs to afford basic necessities.
alex, playing monopoly: sorry, if you wanted to win, you should’ve tried not being poor.
alex: [walks into a psychic’s shop and slams down her own deck of tarot cards]
alex: it’s time to duel.
