always-somewhere-else87:

Frustration

  I’ve always been attracted to orgasm control, to imagine how much frustration I could take and what it would make me feel and do, how it would change me. When I finally had the chance, I started to share some thoughts on this: first how fun it sounded the idea of tease and denial, holding an orgasm for short periods of time, as a way of control over someone, a symbol of submission. He was amused by my fantasies and used them against me over time, to find out more, those little secrets one hides from the whole world, even though they are what we truly want the most to try and/or share.

  I should say he is a true sadist, watching someone struggling because of whatever predicament he built for them is what makes him feel alive and - of course - that has to be the worst (best?) combination for my darker fantasies. It’s more than getting pleasure from having someone submit to unpleasant/painful situations to please him, he just loves other people’s suffering and to find ways to increase the cruelty, little by little, stretching his “victim’s” ordeal without truly breaking them, or having to stop. Taking a step further is always the goal, it allows him to be creative and exercise his brain, like trying to solve a riddle, he gets obsessed.

  So he started to work on his project: making me the most sexually frustrated woman on earth… To do this, the first step is actually to do the opposite: he made sure that I had the best, most  incredible pleasure from sex, the most explosive orgasms, by exploring my body, my reactions, studying the effects of different stimulation he implemented, the best pleasure/pain ratios, everything he could think of and read about. For someone who had a - at best - meh sex life it was… lovely. :)

  But lovely wasn’t the point, was it? So, as time went on, the teasing and denial periods stretched - I didn’t mind, by then it helped me to feel even more intense sensations and orgasms, when finally allowed. I LOVED IT, I felt so good about myself, about my body, my life, everything! And what made me hornier than ever was always the stories he would tell me, how he’s going to make me suffer so badly from constant aching, sexual need… How he’s going to strip me from every ounce of pleasure my body is allowed to feel, until all I have and know from then on is deep, maddening frustration. He will have no mercy, there will not be any relief, even orgasms will be used to frustrate me more, to make me more desperate for something that will never happen - ever again. I will have to learn to cope with it, to adapt to that new way of living, for as long as I will be under his control. I will truly learn that begging is the last thing I’ll want to do to a sadist… It will happen the hard way, because there’s no doubt I will beg. And beg. Again and again, until it dawns on me what I got myself into…

-Is that what you want princess? Are you sure?

-YES YES YES YEEEEES PLEAAAAAAASE!!!!!!!!!!!

-You’re not saying yes just because I’ve been working you up into a horny mess of a girl?

-NOOOOO, I promise you, I WANT IT SO BAAAAAAAD!

-That makes me so happy princess, it will please me so much…

   He knows I’m wired to please others and that I will do anything to please him, I love being under his control. And he will make sure that I choose this for myself, almost as I’m the one pushing the idea on us, the one in control.

Yeah, I’ll be fine. I’m sure of it.

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