sleepyowlwrites:

writing prompts! more cursed friendship lines edition

they’re mine, but now they’re yours!

1. are you asking because you just now noticed or because you want to make sure others have noticed too?
2. well, we can’t all run on sunshine.
3. how do you still have a straight face right now?
4. I know what I just said, but just because I said doesn’t mean I mean it and just because I mean it doesn’t mean I said it, except that one is more problematic because then people don’t know what I mean.
5. You just know me pretty well, that’s all. You’re not super smart or anything.
6. what do you mean what do we do? We take pictures as evidence and complain about it later.
7. alright, I’m gonna tell you straight up. I don’t like you. You’re always rolling up your sleeves and scaring me.
8. I can’t take the fall for this. No way. I’ve been falling all week and my shins are all purple.
9. I think you threatened to steal something of mine and in my sleep-deprived state, I felt vaguely fearful and forgot that I could just tackle you and hold you prisoner.
10. I want to be a unicorn when I grow up.
11. why are you able to translate everything into an opportunity to hug me?
12. you two have been staring at each other for a while.
13. you have to ask me! Spoiler alert - the answer’s no.
14. do you think you can just solve all my problems with ice cream?
15. in conclusion, there’s something wrong with me and I’m in good company.
16. why do you have to assume I did something?
17. I stole your shoes and you chased me down and hit me on the head.
18. if you kick me in your sleep I’m kicking back.
19. I said I was going for a jog. I said it just this morning. Don’t you remember?
20. oh, well, don’t let me interrupt your soulmate time.
21. are you okay? Do you need anything? You’ll sleep with me tonight. Or do you want to sleep alone? Whatever you want. I was really worried! Gosh, you’re gonna make me old! Take care of yourself! I’ll take care of you, too. Are you really okay?
22. You could pick me up anytime if someone challenged you to do it.
23. anger takes energy and I have none to spare, so I’m just passively aggressive.
24. well, this has been very enlightening, but I think I’m going to bed.
25. I’m sorry, but you shoot about as well as a stormtrooper with a faulty blaster who’s blundering around in a jungle at midnight in a thunderstorm with a concussion and his shoes tied together.