#but im so so excited to finally get it up

Chapter Ten
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SUMMARY:The legends are in Psamathe for three weeks for press week. It’s week two and Wattson and Octane haven’t seen each other since we last saw them.
RATING:K-T
SHIPS: Wattson and Octane
TAGS:alcohol, food mention, anxiety, fluff, angst, slow burn
around 12.5k words

Natalie sat in the restaurant downstairs slumped over a bit, her elbow on the table and resting her head in one of her hands. She was shoving the food around on her plate, looking uninterested and lost in thought. Her feet tapped under the table, a sigh leaving her as she took a small bite. 

It was slightly packed this afternoon, each table having someone sitting at it, the crowd moving in and out at a quick pace and tables rotating faster than normal. Natalie was grateful for her reserved seating right now, otherwise eating here for lunch seemed to be a stressful event she wouldn’t want to be a part of. She was growing annoyed at the sound of laughter, though, not being able to summon the feeling in herself authentically all day.

She just felt down in her spirits lately, and maybe that was her own fault.

Across the table from her sat Ajay who was finishing her plate, eyeing her friend as she took the last bite of her own food.

Ajay clicked her phone screen on, checking the time and her notifications to see if Octavio had replied yet with no luck.  

She grabbed a napkin to wipe her face, clearing her throat as she looked at Natalie.

She knew that Octavio could be anywhere in the hotel – or literally anywhere on Psamathe, really – but Ajay wasn’t going to go tracking him down. She knew he was probably doing something that took his attention away and not to waste her time trying to get it from said activity. He would come back after the fact. He always did, it was annoyingly reliable and also unreliable at the same time. Example alone he even followed her to the games; he just showed up and she had to accept it.  

Luckily, they had a better relationship since the incident with his legs but they still rocked back and forth from time to time. No matter what though, she wanted the best for him and Natalie seemed to bring it out of him. She wasn’t so sure about the reverse just yet, but knew at least that Natalie wanted him to care about her too. It was enough for her to feel like she had room to prod at the topic.    

“Yuh good? You’ve barely touched your lunch today. I thought you liked what you got.” Ajay asked, trying to hide her concern for the blonde who had been somewhat quiet all morning through interviews and now during lunch.  

All Ajay had heard all day in passing was small mentions of Octavio scattered throughout each conversation with one another; and she had seen her a lot with having to be in most interviews and press conferences alongside each other since 6 this morning. Ajay had tried to find Octavio for Natalie unbeknownst to her knowledge, just wanting to push the two of them together at this point. She was growing tired of watching them spin around, it was normal for him to never make up his mind but painful to watch from the sidelines when she could see an easier route; which there was.

Natalie looked up from her plate of half untouched food, sitting up slowly and shrugging tiredly. “Je vais bien.”

“Uh huh, but is that a lie?” she persisted, poking Natalie again with another question.

All it did was result in another heavy sigh, Natalie slumping backwards into the booth and looking down at her feet under the table. She anxiously ruffled her bangs, and avoided eye contact with Ajay. Her mind was racing around ways her week could have gone better but she was sat regretting the choices she didn’t take.

It had been over a week since she had the time or opportunity to see Octavio, and she ran from it the second the option appeared at her doorstep. Even though all she had wanted was to see him, she couldn’t get herself to let it happen.

He had shown up to see her late last night and she hid in her suite, pretending to be asleep although she heard him outside the door. He knocked a few times and she was certain he stayed for a minute before leaving, the mechanic whir of his legs giving him away.

Her mind was becoming more and more consumed with negative outcomes and because of that she had ended up keeping him at arm’s length. She knew she missed him but also knew she couldn’t help herself from wanting him when he was around. It was an issue for clear thinking. She just couldn’t think straight around him and she wasn’t sure if she loved it or was just fearful of a devastating end too much to try any further. She knew heartache and the searing pain it could cause. That couldn’t be the story for the two of them.

It was easier to sort through her feelings on her own; but being on her own meant a gnawing settling in her as she thought about seeing him. She hated missing him like this, undetermined factors at play. She just wanted to see him, hearing his laughter and thick accent wrap around her, but it felt too dangerous of a desire.

No matter what way her thoughts swayed, the last time they spoke was a broken record in her head.

She was wishing she hadn’t ever made the error of dipping her toes in instead of jumping. She didn’t do what she should have done, and she knew of it already.

It was too cold, too new, and she pulled back too fast because of it. She was scared of freezing – leaving something left unnoticed, losing him, losing the happiness he brought her. All while panicking about whether she was causing just that by trying to stop what felt inevitable at its core. Heartache. She did desperately want him, but at what cost?  She told him she would see him, and now it was obvious this wasn’t as easy of a task to complete as she thought it could be. It entailed so much more than just being around him.

Self-sabotage at its finest; she was letting it all slip away.

“Nat?” Ajay asked again, trying to get her attention while trying to not show her concern.  

“Hm?” Natalie replied, looking over at her and tilting her head in confusion. She felt too scattered to think properly about anything at all and she hated it, a weight in her chest throughout the day. If she couldn’t think properly, how could she make the right decision? She couldn’t ever forgive herself if she made a mistake with this, there would be no repairing it.

It was odd knowing that seeing him would most likely solve some of her worries, but only for as long as she was with him. His presence made her anxieties fade into the background, making them barely noticeable and hidden from her mind. Once she was alone again, she had too much time to think and then think again and again. It was becoming draining to never escape her own worries and she had minimal ideas for getting out of it; one of them being just caving and seeing him no matter the repercussions. She was mentally prepping herself all day for the task, even if she wasn’t sure of completing it.

Natalie grabbed her water, gulping down the last remaining bit and set the glass back down with a clunk on the table that she wasn’t expecting.  

She looked at Ajay, who was giving her a look back that said everything.

Ajay clearly knew what was going on and wanted Natalie to speak the truth first but it didn’t seem plausible to pull the words out and say them. She was actually quite scared of the reality outside her daydream; the two were combining and she didn’t know what to do if both collapsed around her. It seemed simpler to keep them separate out loud, even though it didn’t stop them from intertwining in her mind.

She didn’t even wantto think about it, but it was all that was on her mind. It still seemed like he could vanish at her fingertips, like it wasn’t really happening and she was quite scared of when it could become real. Months ago it wasn’t even on her radar, what was to say it would stay for either of them in a few more?

“Nevermind.” Ajay shook her head, realizing that this wasn’t going to be a conversation to be had right now or maybe at all.

She stood up from her seat and looked back at Natalie to see if she would be coming along with her or sticking around to finish her food.

It took a moment with Natalie looking at her plate and deciding to leave the remaining scraps behind, she just didn’t have an appetite right now, before she stood and followed to leave.

“Have you-” Natalie started, but trailed off almost instantly as they stepped through the doors of the restaurant and into the hallway. She had been trying to slyly mention him throughout the day, but now that it was growing later so was her patience. She had minimal confidence to move forward despite her worry, but still was attempting the question again. “Uhm, are you planning on seeing Octavio later today?”

“Not tonight. I have a gig booked that I was planning on breaking curfew for.” she smiled patting her back with her sticks attached, nudging Natalie with an even bigger grin now. If she couldn’t track down Silva, then she could invite her friend to a distraction. “Yuh want to come?”

“To your gig?”

“Yeah! It might be fun! It’s a bit loud, we can get you some headphones if you’re interested in coming.” Ajay offered, checking her phone one more time before giving her full attention back to Natalie. “I know you wanna see O, but why don’t you try to just do something to take your mind off whatevers going on. He might come by it later tonight, he sometimes does.”

Natalie pursed her lips together, shaking her head ‘no’ nervously. As much as the idea of trying to forget about him for a little while to clear her mind seemed like a smart choice, she wasn’t sure if another party of kinds was the way to go. “I appreciate the sentiment, mon ami. I just don’t think so, though, not today! I may go back to my suite and take a nap before dinner. Maybe some other time, if that’s alright?”

“For sure, just say when you ever wanna come by – you know we’ll always make room for you at our shows!”  

She smiled slightly, reaching her arms out for a goodbye hug and the two embraced tightly for a second. It was comforting being with someone she considered her family. At least a small portion of her felt better.

“Merci, I appreciate that greatly. Have an amazing show tonight! They always are.” Natalie grinned, waving goodbye.

Ajay laughed, walking off down the hall with a wave over her head. “See ya, Nat!”

Natalie took a deep breath once she was alone in the hall, stepping out of the way of the door to lean against the wall. She rubbed her cheek anxiously, resisting the urge to pull out her phone and try to find Octavio on her own right now.

Maybe she should have gone with Ajay despite not wanting to be around crowds right now, she just was tired of being alone with her thoughts.

A small group of three people left the restaurant, the door opening at her side and causing her to go stiff. She let the group pass by with her undetected against the wall, thanks to her silence right now, and watched the three people laughing and talking as they disappeared around the corner. She felt exposed even though all of her thoughts were tucked away in her head.  

She took it as a sign to get walking to her room, as she didn’t want to run into anyone else seeming to be having a better day than her. It shoved her mood even further down to see smiles on strangers faces, sending her wondering if they would be better at this than her. Would they make the right choices, would they stumble?

She didn’t get people, at least she never assumed she did. It was her biggest fault that she eventually realized was a strength later in life. No one is perfect at everything and she had her intelligence in science.

No, she did not get people, but she understood everything else she did and better than most. It was a price to pay for her own self and willingly she came to terms with that at a young age. She didn’t need to understand how people functioned to befriend them, to have them around or in her life. She did enough research to hold over the bare minimum, and learned as much as she could from books and experience. Until Octavio she hadn’t thought that much into what to say or do, she just tried her best. Now, she was overthinking trying to analyze something that could never be - by anyone.

She felt like she would break the two of them in her fingers, crumbling it to pieces because she would make the wrong move. Was there a wrong move? Maybe stalling was the wrong move.

Natalie swallowed the lump in her throat, hurrying while she was alone in the hall towards the elevator. She pressed the button repeatedly, impatient for it to arrive. Once it was cracked open, she slid inside of it as fast as she could to seal herself off from the rest of the hotel.

She clicked the force close button, leaning back against the wall and trying to space out the rickety sound of the ride up. It was a risk taking the elevator right now with people everywhere but she assumed it was faster than trying to run up a few flights of stairs. It paid off too, because she was alone on the way.

It would be a lie if she said she wasn’t hoping Octavio would be outside her suite when she arrived. She loved that he kept magically appearing out of nowhere, something he had always done prior but now it was bringing her a different kind of happiness.

He was the first thing she looked for the second the doors slid open to her floor, and a wave of disappointment came over her the second she realized he wasn’t anywhere to be seen.  

Well-deserved in her mind considering she let him walk away last night. It didn’t stop the disappointment at all, though.

She accepted the truth and pushed herself off the wall of the elevator to start walking forward to her suite, trudging along.

Her hand was in her pocket trying to fish out her room key when she slowed down, stopping her search and stepped forward to place her forehead against the door to her room instead of unlocking it.  

She closed her eyes tightly as she tried to push past the uneasiness she felt, but it wasn’t working.  

She needed to just see him; she needed to stop running from this like distance would answer her questions magically.  

She yanked her phone out of her pocket instead of her key, opening her eyes once she steadied her breath somewhat. Her fingers were typing too fast for her, having to go back multiple times to fix a letter and eventually just scrapping the whole long paragraph she was attempting to write. It was too wordy, too long, too honest. She retyped the new message, just five words and simpler than a half-baked admiration confession over the phone.

TXT TO OCTAVIO – UNSENT 2:56 PM

Can I see you again?

Natalie looked down at her phone, hovering her finger over the send button but just shut the screen down entirely after she couldn’t decide what to do.  

Was it too needy to ask for him to see her this way?  Especially after she let herself miss an opportunity already, she wasn’t sure if this was rude to do – although he had no idea she let him walk away that night. Maybe this was just another excuse to stop it all before it got too far.  

She exchanged her phone for the key and unlocked her door, pushing it open and shuffling inside.  

The door swung closed behind her with a flick of her hand, it clicking shut and letting the darkness of the suite consume her. The curtains drawn closed and all the lights off, she felt safe and hidden within it from the crowds and it instantly brought on a sense of tiredness she had been ignoring.

She kicked off her sneakers and collapsed onto the bed on top of the covers, laid up on her side.  

Nikola hopped up beside her, curling up in front of her stomach an began to purr. After that she didn’t recall dozing off, it happening rather quickly from the day and her stressors. 

               -       -       -

Natalie awoke groggy, and now alone on the bed with the imprint of where Nikola once was under her fingers on the comforter. She yawned, propping herself up with her arm slowly and looked around the dark room to gain her bearings. She was a bit disoriented, but that was most likely just the nap and would fade in time.  

Rubbing her eyes, she got up from the bed and stretched her arms out. Her vision was slowly adjusting to the darkness, but she clicked on the lamp beside her bed to lighten the room a little to speed up the process.  

She let out another yawn as she stood and tried to wake herself enough to change clothes for the night. She should’ve just put on something to sleep in earlier. The shirt and jeans she was in were now slightly wrinkled and spotty with cat hair from the nap.

She walked across the suite as she wiped as much of the fur off as possible, clicking on the light in the bathroom as she entered it.

Natalie leaned on the counter to look at herself closely in the mirror, staring herself down and trying to mentally convince herself to do something. Anything with the Octavio situation. 

Her unsent message sat taunting her in her phone and she couldn’t ignore its’ nonstop begging to be thrown into the world. She wasn’t one to just let things go, to just leave things behind, and it felt a lot like she was doing that on accident out of fear.  

She sighed heavily, hanging her head in her palm and pulling away from the mirror. She couldn’t even look at herself because all she saw was someone who was running from her problems, and she hated how controlling her worries were to the situation when she didn’t want to be sitting on the sidelines forever. She didn’t want to be sitting on an unsent message, not when nothing is guaranteed.

It was never who she was to just watch opportunities of something new pass her by, the chance to learn or grow was something she strove to find. Simply put, she went after things in its entirely and devoured it until she understood it from top to bottom. If she cared, she cared with her whole being. So, the fact she was avoiding the option to feel something she never felt before with him sat unwell within her and couldn’t be explained past an impasse.

She patted at her pockets, taking her phone out and sliding open the unsent message to Octavio. It was hours later from when she originally wrote it, originally wanted it.

She wasn’t sure why she was left to sleep through the last set of interviews for the night but considered it a blessing: the extra sleep and a few less events. No one had come to get her like she assumed they would’ve, just letting her take the absence, she supposed. Either way, she was glad no one had shown up to wake her because she wasn’t going to be willing to go anyway with how she felt. At least she wouldn’t have been going in the best mood or spirits.  

Now that it was late enough in the day she hoped that Octavio would be back at the hotel. He was out doing who-knows-what all day and she was hoping that it would mean he was back by now.

The screen light burned into her eyes making her look away, and after a second of doubt she closed the message again and left it unsent.  

Instead, she left the bathroom to find a fresh pair of clothes and changed into them. She opted for a knee length skirt and sweatshirt with an apex logo on the back, switching into them quickly and looking for her shoes as she changed. She had been wrangled into one of the merchandise booths earlier today and ended up walking away with items for most of the legends – which is where the branded clothing was appearing from and her light-ish wardrobe she packed for the trip was grateful.

Natalie spotted her shoes laying on the floor and snagged them on her way out her door, pulling them on as she hopped out the door and down the hall alternating to each foot as she slid them on.  

She hurried downstairs to the main lobby using the stairs, but once she arrived there, she realized it was the last place she actually wanted to be.

She slunk into the corner of the lobby to escape the bulk of the crowd, finding the doors to the banquet hall that weren’t locked off for once by a rope barrier.

The entire first week she was curiously popping her head around workers to try to see what it looked like inside the room. She wanted to see where they would be broadcasting from this year, a theme always taking place and the legends all dressed up in fancy clothing to accept awards and dancing around the floor together.

She tried to open the door but it barely budged, the hinge catching on the lock and stopping short. She groaned under her breath in defeat, turning to sit on the bench beside the doors and pulled out her phone. She ignored the unsent message and instead opened her socials, scrolling quickly and not really looking at anything on the feed in front of her.

It was just a distraction at first, but she scrolled back up at the sight of blue on her screen as she went.

She found the post she previously went past, the red LIVE button in the corner of the video and Octavio in the screen with a skyline background behind him. The sound was muted for her while she stared at the video waiting to be opened, him throwing his head back and readjusting his mask in the video.

She hesitated but brought up his livestream, the audio starting to play back at her as she watched the comments fly on the side. He was laughing, answering questions for fans and hanging precariously on the edge of what looked like a roof in the video but she couldn’t make out much besides the skyline.

Seeing him made her regrets grow larger, wishing she was wherever he was right now.      

She swiped the live closed, switching to her unsent message to him and stared at it intently. The idea of just shoving herself towards the idea of no return was bouncing in her head and she knew she had to try to do something.  

She had given it a rule book in her head to what made it real, and it meant just that the next time she saw him because seeing him twice solidified all of it into reality. Once was to give it a try, but twice would be her willingly wanting it again.

She was really hoping he was at the hotel, the stream seeming to say that he could be. She finally had a smidgen of confidence to push forward, taking it and running, fighting the fear within her and doing what felt right though terrifying. 

TXT TO OCTAVIO – 10:03 PM

Can I see you again?

Natalie pressed send in a panicked motion, closing her phone instantly once it sent through and leaning her back on the bench as she waited. She let out a shaky breath, tapping her foot nervously. It didn’t take long for him to reply to her, which she was surprised yet happy about. She didn’t think he would get back to her that fast while he was on a stream; she was fully expecting to be left unanswered, so it was relieving to hear back so suddenly.

-TXT FROM OCTAVIO – 10:07 PM

Been waitin for u to say that chica

-TXT FROM OCTAVIO – 10:07 PM

Meet me up on the roof????

She bit her cheek, regretting taking this long to reach out to him now with his reply being so quick – so she began heading straight there the second she finished reading his words.  

She took the elevator to the highest floor she could, having to take the stairs the last two floors and emerging on the roof in the cooler night air after her trek. It was refreshing to be in the fresh air after the walk up, her pausing at the door to take in the coolness of the night.

There was a slight wind being this high up and it was carrying the smoke from the far side of the roof in her direction. She followed the smoke like a trail of breadcrumbs, spotting Octavio sitting on the edge of the building with his legs hanging over the side. He had a cigarette in his one hand and an energy drink sitting beside him on the edge. In the other hand he held his phone, streaming himself for his fans. The glow of the city beneath him looked like stars from this height, and he was relaxed as ever inches from slipping. He flicked the ash over the edge, watching it fall and turned to look over at the sound of Natalie’s footsteps beside him.

“Aye, you made it.” he grinned at her before turning to his phone to bid his fans goodbye with a cheeky chuckle. His fans pleas echoing from the phone to stay longer or show who had arrived on the roof with him, unable to see who it was, failed as he disconnected the feed suddenly after his farewell.  

He threw one leg over to stand up on the roof, rubbing at the back of his neck at the sight of her. He forgot how much he missed her until he was looking right at her, and the parts of him that missed her screamed for him to wrap her up but he shoved it down. He hadn’t seen her in a week, and wasn’t sure if it was the busy parts of work that got in the way or if she had been avoiding him. He didn’t want to push her too far, or too fast.

He knew she was the source of his inability to find a rush with his normal stim, it just didn’thit the same right now and it was because something felt missing. He felt the surge flow through him but it wasn’t the same, aggravatingly so. He got the biggest rush from pushing his boundaries with her lately, it had somehow become better than what he was used to. The novelty of the relationship made it richer, and in time he knew it would fade back to normal and level out but she was new and enchanting.

He knew better than to just push forward but he couldn’t help wanting to ask for more every time he saw her. She was taking her time, not wanting to ruin anything between the two of them, but it was digging into him like a painful thorn every time she walked away without him. He was trying to respect her space and patience but it was growing harder as the days passed.  

“Is this where you’re always hiding, Tavi?” she asked him, a faint smile starting in the corners of her lips as she stood beside him.

He was slipping his hand under his mask to take the occasional puff, but now that he was off of the stream with his fans’ he could take his goggles and mask off entirely. He stuffed both of them into his pocket, looking at her as she walked over to him.

“Ah, don’t rat me out now.” he winked, taking another puff of his cigarette to distract his hands from wanting to pull her in instantly.

Natalie stepped closer, sitting down on the edge where he sat previously and looked down over the side towards the ground. The people were barely visible from here and she knew one wrong movement and she could tumble but tried to shove that feeling off, scooting closer to the inside of the roof than the outer edge.  

Octavio sat back down beside her, hanging his feet back over the side and finished off his cigarette as he did.  

“I won’t. As long as I can borrow your hiding spot sometimes.” she replied, looking at him beside her and turned fully to hang her feet over the side too.  

“Anytime, hermosa.” he bit back the grin on his face, not hesitating to snake an arm around her waist once she was sitting alongside him.

She scooted closer to him, looking out at the skyline and tried to think of something else to say but could only conjure the mundane of typical questions. “So, how has your week been?”

“If I’m honest, without seeing you it was kinda… boring. I cut out of here few times though. It just was a bit ‘bleh’.” he shrugged slightly, swinging his feet under him. “What about you? Any cool new fans who realized you kick ass? I know you had interviews all day.”

“I did meet one person today who was quite friendly! She seemed to like a lot of the legends, mentioned you a few times! We talked for a bit.”

“Well everybody digs the Octrain, so I’m not surprised. She’s got great taste for wanting to meet you.”

“Are you just trying to find ways to compliment me?” Natalie asked, holding back a laugh.  

“Si,” he winked back in reply.

She shook her head with a full-blown laugh now, it fading slowly with her racing thoughts and him noticing as it did.  

“Hey, qué ocurre?”

“I’m fine!” she said, lying though it felt wrong to do so.  

He gritted his teeth, the feeling of wanting to put forth the effort for someone else this much was a new sensation for him. He wasn’t sure how, but the inflection in her voice gave her away despite sounding as peppy as always. The look on her face was what initially gave said lie away to him, but her tone confirmed it. He forced the weariness in him aside, looking down at the ground and rubbing his thumb in circles on her hip. “Please don’t lie to me…”

She sighed, leaning her head on his shoulder in defeat as she was caught in her lie. “Are you sure this is worth risking our friendship?”

“You’re still on that?” he half joked, squeezing her side gently to reassure her before lowering his tone to something more serious that was harder to get out. The more honest he was with her the harder it was to be serious, to be vulnerable without running. He used his free hand to turn her chin towards him, looking into her eyes with a cheeky grin. He wanted to bring her smile back to her face but knew it probably wouldn’t be as easy as he hoped. “You’re worth the risk.”

Natalie caught her breath in her throat, looking back into his eyes as she tried to find her voice. Her cheeks warmed, and she felt like he had all the right answers and her heart couldn’t keep up. It felt too good to be true, a whirlwind she surely would have to crash from. She pursed her lips together, looking down away from him and towards the ground below.  

“Watts?” He mumbled softly after she didn’t reply, losing his humor completely as she stayed silent.  

“What if you become someone you are not because of me? What if you-”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where’s that coming from?” He stammered, stopping her from saying anything further.  

Natalie took a deep breath, sitting up to look at him with concern in her eyes. “You were so kind, so attentive… it was so out of character for you when I was taken out of the match and brought to the med bay. You won alone, and you spent your day with me instead of flaunting that rightful win. I was going to be fine and we all knew that, but you stayed in my room that whole night. I woke a few times and every time I did you were there. I never forgot about that.”

“You saw me?”

“I didn’t think anything of it at the time, truthfully. I just don’t want you to resent me later because of this, I don’t want you to just be trying to be someone you think I would want. I want you, Octavio, but not like that. I do not want to be a negative impact on your life.”

“You? Negative?” he laughed, trying to move past her words but it didn’t work. He sighed heavily as she stayed silent, leaning his head into her shoulder and closing his eyes tightly. “Natalie, por favor, I’m begging you to realize that’s not the case.”

“Even Ajay noticed you were acting different that day. I noticed you all in the hall whispering amongst yourselves and even she seemed pressed about something at the time. You cannot tell me in full honesty you aren’t becoming someone you are not.”

“Is it so bad that I’d at least wanna do that for you?” he began, lifting his head to look at her and using his free hand to turn her chin to look into his eyes again when she broke away. “I care about you, alright?”

She was slightly taken aback and nodded in reply, but sat and listened as he spoke. His hands leaving her face left her breathless and she couldn’t have replied if she tried. He shook his head with an impatient sigh, reconnecting his gaze with hers.

He had a nervous adrenaline building in him that only propelled him forward towards admitting more of himself to her, more of how he felt about her. He had thought they were past this part, past her worry but apparently he had thought wrong.  

“It wasn’t about winning that match after you were gone, I can win whenever I want.” he started, running one of his hands through his hair anxiously. “I was wrecking on myself all match for letting you down, I had to see you after. I thought you’d, I dunno, hate me or something. I thought I ruined my chances. I made a lot of… mistakes in that game and I never stopped to realize where I fucked up in the arena before you. I go in full force each time without thinking and maybe that’s holding me back in some ways. I can spare a secondor two to plan a route, you know? I could’ve helped, probably done a lot more but I didn’t. You made me realize that I could do more… at least sometimes.”

“Tavi, how could I possibly ever hate you?” she frowned, looking down towards the ground below them to watch the lights passing below whenever she couldn’t bare looking into his eyes. She pinched the bridge of her nose, and took a breath.

She forced herself to look at him while she spoke again. “You may run in spontaneously most of the time, but you always do damage and change the course of the game doing so. You are so certain of yourself; it is one of the things I admire about you… I do not want to be the one who changes that somehow. You don’t believe it’s bad for you and who you are as a person?”  

“I’m certain I want you and everything that brings with it.”

“Octavio.” Natalie sighed heavily, pulling her sleeves down into her palms and placing a hand beside her to balance herself. “That doesn’t-”

“Que? I’ll keep doing this for as long as it takes. I’ll keep going in this circle for you until you’re ready, but you gotta give me an actual chance sometime.” he replied quickly, leaning in closer to her as she looked away. He sighed, brushing her hair away from her cheek to expose her scar more before wrapping his arm back around her waist.  “At first, I didn’t know if I liked how it felt to feel like… thatafter I let you down, chica, but I kinda get it now. You may be making me different, but it’s not a bad thing to me. I’m better. A better champion, stunt-man, and uh well, I guess person. Don’t tell Ajay I said that.”

She giggled under her breath, looking up at him with a nod as her nerves settled around her worries slightly. “You really think I make you better?”

He huffed, embarrassed as she pointed the words back at him. He tried to detour the conversation almost instantly while still answering her, rushing through his words. “You reminded me there’s always something more beyond what we have. I hadn’t forgot about it or stopped wanting it, nah, I just lost focus once I joined the games.”  

“Non terrae plus ultra.” she remarked back.

A small smile broke at the corners of his lips hearing her recite his motto back to him, nodding along. “So, you get it, then?”

“As much as I can understand in my own way. I do believe you may make me better too, though.” she whispered back to him, not able to bring her voice above that decibel. She slunk into his arm around her, reaching her hand over to take his free hand in hers.  

He took it willingly, letting their fingers intertwine with a smile and a flirtatious taunt. “You do, huh?”

“Oh, shush.” she giggled quietly, looking at him with a smile on her lips that only made his grow bigger.  

He paused to gaze at her face, his eyes trailing to her lips with a desperate want to pull her in closer. He couldn’t as much as he wanted too – not yet. He felt like she was just convinced they wouldn’t damage one another, and he feared pushing her away again so he held himself back. He glanced up as a drop of rain hit his head and cheek, chuckling slightly as he looked up at the sky. It had blown over with dark clouds covering the once present moon and he knew it would start to pour soon by the looks of it. “Come on, unless you wanna get soaked we should head in.”

She placed her other hand out, catching a few drops of rain in her palm and watched it pool in the center before nodding in agreement. “Oui, alright, lead the way, Octy.”

He stood up from the ledge, the two keeping their hands connected, and he helped her to her feet as well.

She skipped through a few steps along the way, him smiling to himself as she disconnected from his grasp to spin once in a circle as the rain started to come down a bit quicker. He caught up to her pace, reaching around her body to grab the door handle and pressing his chest against her back as he did.

Natalie leaned back into him as he pulled the stairwell door open, and the two hurried inside just in time as a crack of thunder caused a sudden downpour.

Once they were standing together in the stairwell the door shut slowly on its hinge, closing them off from the rain and growing cold air. She brushed her hair out of her face, it starting to stick together from getting slightly wet and let out a lighthearted laugh. She glanced up at him, subsiding her laughter as she looked into his eyes. For once, she didn’t feel nervous that something terrible would happen between them and it spurred new feelings she had been shoving away. His face was glistening from the rain and she wiped a few drops of rain from his forehead with her thumb, unable to hide her staring eyes at his features.

She cleared her throat, looking down and shaking her hair out a bit more even though it was fixed now.

Octavio held back his smile, catching her staring and choosing to leave it unnoticed to her. Instead, he hopped over the railing beside them, dropping down a floor and landing with a thud hidden underneath his cackling laugh. “Vamos!”  

She shook her head with a bubbly laugh, leaning over the railing on her forearms to look below at him for a minute before choosing to just take the actual stairs to catch up.

“This isn’t a race!” she giggled, bounding down the stairs with him.

“Everything is a race, Princesa.” he laughed in reply, but never straying too far from her on the way down.

They made the way down the rest of the floors to his suite together, hurrying through the hall and he unlocked his door with a swipe of a card.

He opened it up, letting her walk inside first and following behind shutting the door behind him with his steps in.

Natalie looked around at the messy suite, it an exact replica of hers but replaced with stim and energy drinks scattered on the floor instead of her notebooks and clothes. She looked around the room, spotting his gaming system hooked up disorganized under the television and a headset sitting atop of it and curiosity piqued her.

He tossed his mask and goggles onto the counter from his pocket, watching her walk into the living area out of the corner of his eye and trying not to stare like they continually kept doing to one another. Always catching moments when the other wasn’t looking.

He looked away from her, opening up the fridge and grabbing himself an energy drink.

She took a seat on the couch, sitting upright and crossing one leg over the other. She picked up one of the games sitting on the table, flipping it over to look at the back of it.

“You want somethin’?” he inquired, his head half sticking in the fridge.

“Non, I’m alright! Merci, though.” she replied, half listening as she read the description of the game in her hands.

He shook his head once, taking his drink and shutting the door to the fridge. He looked over at her again, spotting the game this time and squinted his eyes in confusion. “What’cha got?”  

“It was on the table. One of your games, I think?” she replied, gesturing the game up to show him the cover.  

He nodded as he realized what she had. “Wanna play?”

“Oh, I don’t know how.” she shook her head, setting the game down and crossing an arm over her lap nervously.

“I could show you.” he offered, stepping around the counter and coming over to sit beside her. He set his drink down on the table, sliding the clutter aside with the can as he placed it.  

“Or you could play and I could work on my-” she started before he cut her off with a laugh.

“Did you just say ‘work’? You’re killing me.” he chuckled, rolling his eyes at her suggestion and booting up his gaming system. “No work tonight, come on. Thought this was supposed to be fun, Watts.”

“Fine, fine. You’re right.” she admitted, kicking her shoes off so they sat below her in front of the couch. She tucked her feet up underneath her, leaning towards him and grasping for the controller in his hands. “Show me?”

He gave it to her willingly, having loaded into a game for her to try. A few notifications popped up in the corner of people wondering if he would go live anytime soon, but he ignored them and hoped she would do the same. He didn’t care about doing anything with fans right now, he had spent most of his day streaming to distract from not seeing Natalie. Now, he was finally with her for once and this was his new priority for the time being. He could blend the two together later – right now he just wanted to spend time with her to take in how much his heart raced every time she brushed against his skin.

Octavio put his arm around her, scooting closer as she fumbled with a few buttons to see what they all did. He pointed out a few things, trying to explain it at a pace she would be comfortable with and watched her eagerly as she attempted to play one of his games. It was admirable to see her trying to enjoy something new, even if she did seem frustrated with it at times.

“What do you do for fun?” he asked. “It’s obviously not this.”

“I work on my inventions. Electricity isfun to me.” she replied, her tone serious as she looked over at him and took her attention away from the game. She shrugged, knowing her answer bored most but she didn’t care.  “I also have some other hobbies that I’ve been picking up. Hound was teaching me how to take care of a garden, so I have that set up back home. I have an old vinyl collection, listening to it is magical, like another world when you play anything off of it. Papa found the player for me one year for my birthday. It was stuffed away in my mother’s things that we thought had went missing. I also found a Nessie that year I thought I lost!”

She paused to think, tapping her finger on the controller with a ‘hm’.  

“I enjoy morning runs! We may have that in common, since well, I know you adore running everywhere.” she exclaimed, looking to him to find an amused look on his face causing her to stop and shake her head in confusion. “What?”

“Has anyone ever told you when you get talking about stuff you care about your whole face lights up?” he grinned, captivated by her as she was speaking. He ran his thumb over her shoulder and it only made her flush a deep red in the cheeks.  

“You asked!” she laughed, trying to brush away the look on her face and steady her breath though it wasn’t working.  

“Keep talking about it.” he urged, scooting in closer on the couch. “What are you working on right now?”

“W-what do you mean?”  

“You said electricity is fun, chica! What are you working on?”

She widened her eyes slightly, her mouth forming an ‘o’ shape as she realized he was truly interested in her words. She was so used to people not understanding or taking the time to care that it was a breath of fresh air to hear him ask her about it.  

“Oh! I’ve been working my own abilities lately. I’ve found a way to channel my electric charge through my suit and into my shield. It took a while, considering if it malfunctions I could fry myself from the inside.” she giggled softly before continuing, “It’s still very low powered. Mainly because I was planning on easing into a higher voltage after preliminary testing. I’m hoping to boost it a little so it does more of a difference in the arena later. I just want to test it first before I go tweaking anything, that way I know what the problems are before I go back to alter anything. It’ll save time so I don’t have to pry the whole thing open each time I find a problem.”

“Whoa, okay so, you figured out how to cheat your shield?” he replied, asking for clarification. He liked the concept of it, it was similar to his own abilities but he was already hopeful to see if he could borrow the tech in game to try himself.  

“It is not cheating! You regain your own health back, it’s just as fair as that.” she said defensively.  

“I didn’t mean it in a bad way,” he said trying to reassure her, “it’s actually pretty sick you can do that. It’s like a running current through your suit then? You’re literally carrying around electricity all the time – why hadn’t I realized that sooner?”

“It’s pretty flash-y.“ she sputtered out, a giggle following her pun.  

He shot her a look with a laugh, shaking his head. “That was decent, I’ll give you that.”

“Merci!” she replied with another laugh, looking back at the screen that glowed back with a pause screen. She clicked it back into the actual game and attempted to play again.  

She fumbled with the controller for a little while but started to understand the mechanic after sometime, becoming more fluid with it as he helped where needed. He had moved behind her on the couch overtime, reaching around her whenever she accidentally came too close to death to swoop her out of the bad situation. She got through a few of the levels with minimal assistance from him, but was growing tired as her eyes were wearing down from staring at the screen. Octavio hadn’t seemed to be bothered by it but she was becoming sensitive to the light after a few hours. She had leaned backwards, sitting in between his legs and resting against his chest as he played the game with his arms wrapped around her.

She glanced over at the clock on the wall, shocked to see the time had ticked far past what she thought it was. She must have been distracted from the night, getting too involved with the game and her company with Octavio to even notice the passing of the hours. It was too late into the night now to salvage her sleep. It would be 4 in morning soon, and following quickly after that at six was going to be when she had to get up for the day. She was accepting the lack of sleep part already when she tapped his arms to let her out of his grasp.  

He did as he was asked, though bummed about it, and watched as she stood up to gather her shoes.

“I should go…” she said, quietly.  

“No…” he grumbled, setting the controller down immediately at her words and grabbing for her hands. “Come with me, instead. We can go get breakfast before everyone is in the restaurant.”

“You haven’t slept, Tavi.” she replied, shifting on her heel as she looked down at him on the couch.  

“And?”  

“…Neither have I?” she said with a small laugh, unsure of why this was a conversation when they had to be up soon for work.

“But they serve coffee,” he paused, “and tea.”

She groaned softly, smiling at him despite her annoyance with his battle for her to say yes. It was endearing to see him try so hard to get her to stay, and she did really want to stay.  

“Can I swing by my suite first so I can take care of Nikola for the morning and change?” she asked, looking down at her clothes and then back at him.

“Duh.” he nodded with a smile, hopping to his feet to pull her in by the waist. “Anything, Watts.”

She smiled at him, holding back the flutter of butterflies in her stomach at his words. She hesitated, moving away from him and towards the door putting her shoes on one at a time. “I’ll meet you downstairs?”

“You bet.”

He sidestepped ahead of her, beating her to the door and opening it up for her with a cheeky grin. He leaned on the door frame as she walked into the hallway past him.

She turned on her heel, partially waving at him as she hurried down the hall to the elevator and tried not to think about how she wished she had done something to say goodbye besides wave. It felt so formal when she was daydreaming about the taste of his lips, wondering if he would wrap her up in his arms or they would share a quick peck before parting.  

She was floating on air the entire time she was running around for the morning, her head in the clouds and incapable of thinking about anything but Octavio. She regretted missing those few days with him, wishing that she hadn’t of wasted them in her own worry but was at least happy to know it was in a better place now with the two of them. She swapped into a pair of jeans and a v-neck shirt, grabbing a jacket on her run out the door.

Octavio and Natalie weren’t apart for long, only about twenty-five minutes, mainly because the both of them hurried through everything to get back to one another as fast as possible.  

Octavio was already downstairs waiting outside of the elevator door, his foot against the wall and typing away on his phone. The clicking under his fingers going speedily and sending away a few messages in a row.  

The elevator dinging open brought his attention up, looking over to see if it was who he was hoping it would be; and when he caught sight of her blonde hair, he knew it was Natalie.  

He quickly adjusted his mask and goggles so he looked alright, running a hand through his hair as she approached him. Every time he saw her it was like the first time now, hitting a brick wall and falling to pieces repeatedly. The thrill of knowing she felt the same for him made it that much more fulfilling.  

He instantly hooked an arm around her waist, pulling her in and over to the side of the elevator he was tucked up on. She shrieked slightly from him popping out of seemingly nowhere, but it settled into a laugh once she realized it was him. He pulled his mask down to his chin, giving her a quick peck on the cheek along her scar before putting it back on.  

Natalie blushed furiously instantly and looked around to see if they were alone, making him chuckle to himself at her instant concern. It was adorably easy to rile her up.

“No one’s awake yet, we’re fine.”  

“I just don’t want to ruin this just yet by including fans, and they happen to be everywhere here.” she said, smiling slightly at him as she looked him up and down. He had partially changed into one of his normal outfits in the arena minus the battle gear; his shorts sitting at his hips, and his abs peeking out from underneath his t-shirt slightly. She hated staring at him because she didn’t want to get caught, but she never really stopped to let herself do it prior and she was finally letting herself admit the attraction she had for him to herself.  

He shrugged, understanding her concern but not wanting to stop with his affectionate displays. He enjoyed watching her face blush up too much; it being the opposite color of her eyes shining back at him. He tapped her gently on the chin once before pulling out his phone to check on his messages. “So, hermosa, change of plans from breakfast. We really won’t be running into anybody because Che needs a ride back into town, her van broke down. Plus, says she’s unfit to drive anyway. Don’tknow what that means but I imagine we’ll find out.” he shook the keys to one of the cars sitting out back in his hand, smiling widely under his mask. “Care for another joyride, instead?”

“Oh, I was going to get some-”

“Tea?” he replied, scooping a cup off of the bench beside him and handing it to her.  

She took the drink partially flustered but thanked him quietly. It was a kind gesture that didn’t serve him in anyway and it made it that much more thoughtful, especially when she never thought he had stopped to notice these sorts of things before. “Merci. You didn’t have to do that.”

“I felt bad the plans changed so suddenly, figured you’d want it for the road.” he shrugged, trying not to linger too much on the sentiment. He stopped, back tracking and rubbing at the back of his neck. He hadn’t stopped to ask her if she wanted to even come along, he’d just assumed.  

“Unless you don’t wanna come, that’s fine too.” he added on swiftly.

“Do not feel bad, I understand! Ajay needs assistance, that’s more important. I don’t want her getting busted being off property, not all of us can sneak around like you in the daytime.” Natalie smiled, zipping up her jacket since they would be going outside and pulling up her hood. “I’ll gladly tag along!”

He snickered at her words, offering his arm for her so they could walk out together. He was half expecting her to turn him down because of her worry of being caught but she glanced around once and must have decided it was alright to do, and he was happy for it. “The trick is to act like you belong and no one stops you until you break something; at least in my experience.”

She took a sip of her drink, giggling into the cup as she hooked her arm into his to start the walk to the back lot. “You are basically a professional at this point, I suppose, then! How many places are you banned from again?”  

“A handful.”  

“How vague.” she teased, disconnecting their arms and pushing open the back door with her hip. She turned on her heel, looking back at him as the door rested against her side and held it while he caught up. He wasn’t lingering behind for any reason other than he couldn’t stop watching her move, and he felt badly for it every time it happened but couldn’t stop wondering about what stopped him from noticing her before. Each time he saw her he spotted something new and added it to his list of things that drew him to her. She had her own air about her – down to the way she bounced on her feet to walk around, her resonating laughter, the way her hips swayed, the sparkling excitement in her eyes whenever they came across something fun.  

He placed his hand on the door above her head, propping it open for her.

They walked outside together, slightly in a hurry to pick up Ajay on the outskirts of town. The pavement was still wet from the rain through the night, but the clouds above finally started to dissipate and fall apart. Natalie took a deep breath, stalling partially, the smell of wet soil prominent in the air and the quiet chirping morning starting to appear though it wasn’t light out yet.  

The two hurried to the car, Octavio snagging her door and opening it for her before sliding over the hood to hop into the driver side; simultaneously sliding open his messages to Ajay as he started the engine up.

She huffed at him, laughing under her breath as she got into the car. She didn’t even have enough time to react, him moving too fast for her to stop it.  

She dropped back into her seat, stretching out and watching him typing away on his phone.  

He replied quickly to Ajay, telling her he was on the way and tossed his phone on the dashboard before pulling out of the spot to drive off.  

Natalie took another drink of her tea as she leaned forward, turning on the radio and leaving it on a lower setting. The hum of the morning news came from the speakers and she skipped around the channels until she found something that was playing music. The base beat of the song reminded her of the fact that Ajay had thrown the event last night, wondering if Octavio had given up going or was never planning to go at all.

“I was kind of surprised you did not go to her gig last night.” she started, looking over at him in the driver seat as she rolled her window down slightly to let fresh air through the car. “I thought that’s where you would be, anyway.”

“I’d be anywhere you are.” he cleared his throat nervously after his words, gripping the steering wheel under his fingers. That was a bittoo honest. “It’d be great going to one of her shows with you, though. Would you wanna do that sometime?”

“Of course!” she eagerly agreed, reaching out to wrap her hand around his arm. “Just tell me when and where.”

“I thought I’d have to convince you.” he chuckled, easing his nerves and letting out a shaky breath though riding the high it was giving him to feel that way.  

“Non, I promised you I would try new things, didn’t I?”

He tilted his head to the side, pursing his lips together with a nod. He wasn’t going to fight that logic, especially when it benefited him.  

Natalie rested back in the passenger seat, taking a sip of her tea as she looked out the window and mindlessly drew shapes on his arm with her fingertips. She was watching out the window as the buildings passed by, them driving through the downtown area again but this time passing right by the road to where they got shakes and continuing further out of the city instead of turning.  

Her touch sent chills down his spine, him sitting up more as they got closer to where they were headed to get Ajay but unable to shake the feeling in his chest that pounded and swirled. It felt false to know she was beside him, wanting to be here with him just the same as he wanted to be with her. Yet, the touch of her fingertips and his pulse racing in his chest told him it was all very real.

He pulled into a dirt parking lot, slowing the car down as he circled the lot to find the van. In the middle of the lot stood a warehouse with a few cars and the van parked out around it. Ajay was propped on the side of her van and sitting in an oversized hoodie and yawning slightly as the car pulled up. She had a can in her hand, crumpling it up and tossing it into the back of the van as she finished off the last gulp.  

Octavio parked, rolling down his window as soon as it halted in place. He hopped out of the window, standing on the driver seat to look over the vehicle and yelling over the top of the car. “Che!”

Natalie giggled to herself at the scene, rolling her window all the way down to watch as Ajay caught wind of his yells.

Ajay closed the van door it sliding shut with a click, taking her bag with her and strolled over to the car with a confused look on her face. She squinted, looking into the passenger side to see who was there but couldn’t make them out of the shadow from the lights overhead in the parking lot.

“Hey, how’s it?” she asked, leaning down slowly and into the window to see who was in the passenger seat as Octavio dropped back down into the car.  

He bounced once, leaning onto the passenger seats back to look out the window at Ajay who was letting her eyes adjust to the interior of the car.

“Who didjya- oh, hey Nat.” Ajay said, smirking to herself before moving to get into the backseat of the car.

“Been alright, we’ve been up all night.” he said, looking into the backseat as the door opened but let his hand trail along Natalie’s leg for a minute.

Ajay faked a retching noise, sliding in as she did and dropped her bag at her feet. “I do not need to know anything else. Bit soon, huh?”

“Get your head out of the gutter,” he laughed, looking over at Natalie to make sure she wasn’t uncomfortable with the conversation.  

She must have caught his glance of worry, because she squeezed his hand gently and turned to look behind her at Ajay. He readjusted how he was sat in the driver seat, gripping the steering wheel to leave.

He tapped his foot impatiently, partially from waiting until the door was closed so he could drive off again; but he would be lying if he wasn’t anxious to hear what Natalie had to say.  

He focused on his driving but occasionally peeked at Natalie out of the corner of his eye as she spoke.

“We played video games! He showed me the controls and I got to level nine basically all by myself. So, I would say that I obtained a new skill, kind of! It’s been a productive night. We were going to get breakfast, but you needed a ride so I decided to come with. I hope that’s alright.”

“Yuh were gonna go get breakfast after spending all night together?” she declared back with a wide smile, eyeing Octavio in the rearview mirror. It was some kind of progress and she couldn’t deny how happy it made her to see, especially when she was worried that he wouldn’t be able to commit to the idea in the first place. It was a start and she was hoping there was more to it than just a night spent together.  

“What about it?” Octavio asked, speeding up the vehicle to get back to hotel before anybody would be back at the front desk. He also wanted to get away from this conversation with Ajay, he was weary of the ground underneath Natalie and himself and wasn’t sure if anything could break it just yet. He wasn’t ready to let go of Natalie; and a slightly intoxicated Ajay, as he was beginning to realize he was dealing with, was knowledgeable enough to say just the wrong things.  

“What do you mean‘what about it’, seriously you two?” Ajay groaned, raising an eyebrow in confusion. She leaned back in her seat and crossed her arms over her chest. Her head dropped back against the headrest, her eyes closing momentarily.  

She sighed, shaking her head at them and opened her eyes with a squint. “I’ve had quite a few tonight and am still sort of runnin’ on a buzz, and while I appreciate yuh both coming to get me and all I gotta ask… are you two dating now or what? It’s been clear for a minute now that yuh both have some kind of feeling for-”

“We’re just seeing how things go, hermana. Mira, do you want me to stop for some food or something?” he interrupted to ask her; a bit worried at the state of her but more at her words, glancing back in the rearview mirror as he drove. He darted a glance at Natalie, worried about her reaction too. He could tell he couldn’t stop anything Ajay would say, her filter uncapped, but he hoped Natalie wouldn’t take it too strongly.  

“M’ sorry, I just can’t stand that you both keep talking to me about each other and it’s like – just kiss already, you know? I got one of yuh in this ear and the other over there. Stop tellin’ me yuh wanna but can’t.” she exhaled heavily, hiccuping. Her arm stretched out over the backseat, and Ajay slid down onto her stomach in a slow motion. She rested her cheek against the cool fabric of the seat, yawning once and closing her eyes again.

Natalie hid her smile as she glanced back at Ajay, biting down on her bottom lip to hide her amusement and leaning over to Octavio with a stifled giggle. “Is she going to be alright for interviews today?”

“Probably not.” he chuckled in reply.

“Don’t talk about me