#choi hyunsuk fluff

You & Hyunsuk are strangers, the whole world seems to think otherwise.

In his last year of high school, Hyunsuk makes the mistake of accidentally confessing to the wrong person. That’s where everything goes wrong.

·

“Excuse me,”

Turns to find you. And a boy.

“Do– do you need something?” Your smile is unbearable, the kindness in your eyes bright and blazing on your face. Head tilts, the boy’s head does the same – synced in a way that doesn’t mean friendship, deeper than it looks. More.

“I… Um!” Turns to your locker, stares at it – heart drops, chews on his lip. Bites hard.

“… Ask if he’s okay,”

Hyunsuk feels the burn, your eyes and the boy’s – searing at the back of his neck, seeping into his skin, bones, to his heart. Feels the red bloom of embarrassment grow on his cheeks.

“Are you okay? You look like you’re sick–”

Hyunsuk runs. Wants the ground to open up and swallow him – he made a mistake. Accidentally gives you his love letter for someone else – he makes a mistake, and he doesn’t know what to do.

Hyunsuk makes a mistake and runs.

·

“Maybe it’s a bomb –”

Yoshinori leans close to you, stares over your shoulder at your locker. Steals a glance at your face, before he bumps your shoulder gently with his, says, “– or a very lovely love letter,”

“Or maybe, he made a mistake and accidentally put it, said love letter, in my locker,”

“That only happens in Shoujo manga…” He pouts, bottom lip jutting out. You shrug, looking to him, a smile blooms on your face, “my life could be a work of fiction, you never know, Yoshi.”

“I’ll believe it when I see it,”

You begin to taste something bitter in your mouth. Wondering if it is a love letter, or if it’s a mistake, or it’s – you dwell on your thoughts. Feels a hand ground into your shoulder, kneads through the layers of your uniform. Presses soft, too gently on you – “it’s okay to reject people, you know.” Nods his head, brings you back to reality.

You nod, open palm moving to cover his hand, “It’s okay to reject people,” you say back. Repeating his words, more to yourself than to anyone else.

“I’ll go get us milk, you’ll wait here for me, right?” Waits until you hand him over a few coins from your bag, fingers brushing against his. You nod, “obviously,” you say quietly. He smiles before he’s gone.

You stare after him. Feel the heat burning in your gut, you inhale. Swallow the world and feel something heavy on your shoulders.

You open your shoe locker, stare at the letter above your outdoor shoes. Stare and stare, until realization hits.

This could be for you, or it could be for someone who isn’t you – you don’t open it. Not until after lunch, after mouthfuls of rice, after your strawberry milk, after Yoshinori walks you to class, and goes to his.

Once you sit in your desk. Placing the pink envelope in between the folds of your notebook. Tearing it open, and placing out the parchment paper in your schoolbook, in the folds again.

Parchment paper between fingers, scratches against your forefinger. Draws blood, seeps into the corner of the paper.

You whip your fingers against your woollen sweater, red staining brown. Before your heartbeat quickens.

You looked beautiful today. I wanted to talk to you, ask you if you liked the color green – or any colors, you probably like colors. I chickened out, felt like I wasn’t enough to be beside you. But you looked beautiful today. I like the way you look. Your hair, the way the sun catches it – I wonder how your hair will look green. Probably wouldn’t match you, maybe it would. But I like the color green, I wanted to ask if I should dye my hair green. I probably won’t. Too chicken for that. Just like I’m too chicken to talk to you – I want to write poems about you, expect I don’t know how, and my friends think that’s weird because I can’t spell correctly when I’m expressing myself. What do you think? Am I good at writing? Grammar really shouldn’t matter, right? If it does– I’m rambling, can you do that through pen and paper? Anyways. I think you’re beautiful. I like the way you look – I just like you. There’s no one like you. I hope one day you like me just as much as I like you.

Your not-so secret admirer, Hyunsuk.

Then your heart stops. Your knees knock together.

The letter smells like strawberries.

·

Hyunsuk sits with Jihoon. Watches Bang Yedam make his way to them, Asahi following close behind – they’ve been attached by their hips when someone swore that they were too awkward with one another, Yedam’s face grew red and Asahi had said, “we aren’t, you just don’t see us together often,” – let’s Yedam press close to him when he sits beside Hyunsuk. And Asahi stands, stares at students eating their lunches, while popping the joints in his hands.

“I messed up.”

Jihoon is sighing, face twisting in confusion, “in what way? The kind of way that means cleaning up after you, or the kind of way that means–”

Hyunsuk interrupts him, voice barely a voice, “I gave the letter to the wrong person…”

Yedam is leaning up, staring at the side of Hyunsuk’s face, and Asahi has stopped the popping. “Are you alright?” It’s cautious, too low for anyone to hear, Hyunsuk nods before he drops his head, hands coming to curl around the back of his neck. Still feels the burning of your stare there, “I’m just so embarrassed. Like, why would I do that like that? I’m so – oh my god, there’s that guy that was with them!” His voice squeaks, draws attention. And he’s pushing himself behind Jihoon, who stares at the boy with eyes wide.

Asahi says, “That’s Yoshinori.”

And Yedam is humming, nodding along in understanding. “He’s always in the music room with class 1’s [reader],” And suddenly realization hits. “You confessed to [reader], didn’t you?” And Asahi is walking away despite Jihoon calls for him. “There he goes. Our son is growing up,” Jihoon says jokingly, and his smile snaps away when Hyunsuk’s face turns purple, like all the air in his lungs has been pulled away.

Asahi stands behind Yoshinori as he buys two milks from the vending machine, talks to him. Hyunsuk watches as he smiles at Asahi, soft. Pulls the corners of his mouth gently, lightens up his face. Wonders if you two are together – Then Yoshinori is waving awkwardly at them, smile soft. Cheeks reddening. Asahi is shrugging as his mouth moves.

Then Yoshinori is leaving, stealing glances at Hyunsuk. Just Hyunsuk. Only Hyunsuk – and Asahi is coming back.

He says, “he’s in the manga club with me.”

A breathe escapes Hyunsuk’s mouth, “I’m so dumb…”

Yedam hand rubs Hyunsuk’s shoulder awkwardly, “maybe they’ll both forget about it.”

“He wrote about how he wonders what their hair would look like green,” Jihoon says, mouth twitches. Hyunsuk is sighing, “I was just wondering…”

“… Why would you even wonder that?” Asahi questions. Brows narrowing at Hyunsuk, and Jihoon laughs, hand covering his mouth. Makes it muffled.

“I don’t want to be friends with you guys.”

“I’m trying to make you feel better, hyung!”

·

After school, after club practice, after Yoshinori leaves the school early to catch his bus – you’re alone.

Left by your shoe locker switching shoes, White cotton socks on wooden flooring. You shrug off your woollen sweater, folding it before shoving in your bag. A student walks by, nodding his head to you as he leaves, “be safe,” you say quietly. Watching as he leaves. You stare absentmindedly at the sky, before the door closes. You continue to stare once it’s closed.

“Um. Hey.”

A voice startles you. You jump. Knocking your bag over, your things spell out, along with the letter.

Hyunsuk stands. Hands reaching out, unmoving. Still.

“I– I’m so sorry!” He’s bowing. Head hung low.

“You just scared me, it’s alright.”

He’s kneeling, grabbing your stuff. Sliding it across the wooden floor. Toward you. They sit at your feet, before you kneel to. Knees pressing atop the floor. The crevices of wood holding skin. “You shouldn’t do that. I could have punched you,” You smile at him, but he keeps his head low.

Strangely, you don’t like it.

“Can you take a confession back?”

He asks. Your heart begins to hurt.

–No, this is the first boy to ever like you. He’s thinks you’re beautiful, he likes your hair, and you. And you don’t know him, but for the first time – you don’t know.

“I don’t know you. I don’t like you. Like– like that. I think you should dye your hair. I think green is nice, but I like black because it’s ever color. I don’t know you… And I don’t want to know you. I’m not looking for romance. Not now.”

For the first time you look at him. Think you see, see you. And he does.

You hope he does. But you also don’t.

“I… Okay, but can you answer my question.”

You smile, your head tilts and you say thoughtfully, “You can’t, not once you’ve already confessed.”

He nods. Your cheeks begin to burning. Palms becoming sweaty. You swear he’s beautiful. “I’m sorry,” He apologizes, “But I–”

“There you are!” A friend of his appears. Eyes on you and the contents of your bag on the floor. “I was looking for you, you weren’t in class.”

“I was… I was just apologizing to [reader].”

You nod, beginning to grab your things. Hand touching the letter before you slide it to him. “Be careful next time.” You say, because he’s taking his confession back and he nods. Cheeks reddening.

You’re shoving your things in your bag, standing up in a hurry. “See you both,” Grabbing your shoes, and slamming your locker with more force then intended.

Your eyes blur, and you wonder if it means you aren’t enough.

It isn’t that, you just don’t know.

·

“They looked upset.”

Hyunsuk is staring, the letter by his knee. Torn open, pink suddenly doesn’t look like it should. It doesn’t feel like a lovely color anymore.

“They were.”

A realization hits – you wanted the letter to be yours.

(He doesn’t know that there is a girl listening in, hands curling around her books, mind swirling – “[reader] was confessed to by Hyunsuk!” she gushes the next day to a few other girls. “They rejected him! Why would they even do that?!”)

·

#main protagonist: hope you’re home safe and sound, can we have lunch with a friend tomorrow? (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧ [06:48]

#readerchan: i am! and of course, anything you want! ^_____^ [06:50]

You’re changed, pajamas soft your skin. You finish up your homework. Settling in your bed, phone in your hand.

#main protagonist: yeah, a friend from the manga club asked if i wanted to meet his friends, he invited you (´⊙ω⊙`)！[06:53]

#readerchan: that’s weird… [06:53]

#main protagonist: it is weird! i was like !, and then he was like ?, but i said yes [06:54]

#main protagonist: that guy who was by your locker is his friend (๑•﹏•) [06:54]

#main protagonist: i can decline, make up an excuse like i got sea sick and forget about his invitation lol [06:55]

#readerchan: you’re so weird~ [06:59]

Sighing, you lay down and stare at the ceiling. Eyelids closing over irises. You picture a cow jumping over the moon, feeling your heart heavy in your gut.

You sleep and dream of the boy you barely know.

Hyunsuk, Hyunsuk, Hyunsuk, Hyunsuk – you wonder how he’d look with green hair.

·

Hyunsuk is walking to school. Bundled in a coat, the morning air bitter against his skin.

Closing his air as he walks down an emptied street, listens to a song that makes his body ache – pull it together, we could love you, forever and ever – sees you hopping in the bus, coat buttoned up, woollen sweater in your arms along with two bags. A brown paper bag, and aged leather. Watches you fade into bodies on the bus through glass.

Realizes you live down the street from him.

Then he continues walking. Wondering if he should buy Yedam lunch.

·

At school, Yoshinori is waiting patiently by your shoe locker, already talking to someone. You recognize him as the boy from yesterday, the one who isn’t Hyunsuk – “– you heard that? From a freshman? I don’t think that’s true–” Yoshinori stops talking, face turning red at you. And the boy stares, and stares, and stares. Until you redden. “Wh… Um, hello.” You bow, and he smiles. Lifts at corner, before it spreads across his face. And Yoshinori waves. Awkward, like he has something he shouldn’t tell you.

“You’re [reader]?”

You nod, smiling. Shuffling between feet. Standing awkwardly in the hall.

“Uh. There was –”

“There is.” Yoshinori says, low. Quietly. The boy continues, “There is a rumor. It’s about you. And Hyunsuk. And Yoshinori.”

Your face twists. “… Hyunsuk?”

Your voice expressed regret over embarrassment. “Um. I didn’t accept his letter.” You’re looking at Yoshinori. Forgetting about the boy for a moment. “I couldn’t.”

Your heart hurts.

You walk cautiously to your locker. “They should fade, they won’t last – tell Hyunsuk not to worry.” You smile. And it looks bitter on your face.

The boy nods. Smiling, “See you later.”

His hand pats Yoshinori on the back before he’s gone.

“Why didn’t you accept? Hello, Shoujo romance is cheesy, you should have –”

“It’s also cringy, Yoshi.”

He sighs, hand going to his pants pocket, holding a manderine out. An open palm and a smile too soft – you grab it slow, fingertips brushing against his palm.

You don’t see Hyunsuk watching. Feeling the low unsettling burn of something in his gut – eyes on your face, your cheeks, your fingers – realizes you don’t want a letter from him, but from Yoshinori.

·

Hyunsuk walks to class after putting his things away. Thinks of Yoshinori and who he is – and why he doesn’t like you the way he should.

“What are you thinking about?” Yedam is by his side, books in his arms. Face lightening up at him.

“Yoshinori. Do you know him?” Yedam slows, thinking. Brows furrowing, lip going between his teeth. “Only that he’s in the manga club.” Shaking his head softly.

“Manga club…” Hyunsuk stops, sees you walking down the hall with Yoshinori. “What do you know about [reader]?”

Your head turns and you don’t see him. Your cheeks are tinged red, only seeing Yoshinori who doesn’t see you in the way you want – “they’re really nice. I talked to them once,”

Hyunsuk decides, why not – and vows to make Yoshinori jealous. For you. Only you.

That’s his second mistake.

·

You peel the manderine during break. At your desk, atop notebooks and schoolbooks. Fingers pull the skin, tearing the flesh of the manderine.

Your fingers softly ground into the pulp, pulling the piece apart and laying them on your tongue. Chewing slow, feeling the warmth of happiness bloom in your chest.

Until Hyunsuk walks into your class looking at you with a smile.

You begin choking, grabbing your water bottle and chugging.

“Are you okay?” He’s suddenly in front of you, concern written on his face – “I shouldn’t have come, I’m so sorry, I clearly almost killed you–”

And you laugh, because he’s rubbing his chin. Forgetting about you.

It snaps him back into reality, looks at your face, red discoloration seeping into your skin. You look different without Yoshinori.

You look beautiful.

“You almost killed me twice already,”

You say, softly. And you don’t notice eyes watching you both. All you can see is him.

He gestures towards the empty desk beside you. “May I sit with you?” You nod.

“Did I really almost kill you?” He questions. It’s cute, makes your heartbeat quicken. You don’t feel it, you don’t feel the pink crawling up your neck.

You and Hyunsuk talk. You give him a piece of manderine and watch his entire face redden when your fingers brush his palm.

A friendship blooms.

·

“I talked to [reader].” He tells Yedam. Whispers it, like a secret. It is.

Yedam nods, looking at him to continue. “They’re nice.” Yedam is humming, makes Hyunsuk’s gut jump. He agrees, low and quiet. Smiling.

They wait for Jihoon and Asahi. By a bench near the school doors. Yedam’s lunch in plastic containers on his knees, tells Hyunsuk, one is for Jihoon. And Hyunsuk pouts, “None for me?” Yedam is pushing him, softly with his shoulder.

The hair on Hyunsuk’s neck stands when he sees you trailing after Yoshinori. Hair blowing in the breeze that passes, hand pushing it away. The other hand clenched tight around a brown paper bag.

Doesn’t notice his heart burning.

“You look beautiful in the sun.”

He says, and he smiles. Watches you freeze. Face flushing, before you say, “…You too?”

Thinks it’s true. That you look beautiful in the sun.

Doesn’t notice you staring at Yoshinori. Doesn’t notice Yoshinori staring at him.

·

You sit beside Yoshinori and Yedam. Across from Hyunsuk.

You pick at a jelly sandwich, listening to Yoshinori talk about Shoujo manga and the recent adaptation of his favorite manga with Asahi – you think of manderines and if they remind Yoshinori of you, or if he’s just a good friend.

Your gut starts becoming uneasy. Emptying out.

Would Yoshinori ever like me?

You think. Chewing the inside of your cheek until Hyunsuk hands you a strawberry, smiling at you.

Yoshinori stops talking. Stares at you. Stares at Hyunsuk.

You think, but rejection is okay, if Yoshinori doesn’t like me, other people will. And you take it, pretending you are in a Shoujo manga. Just like Yoshinori said.

You smile. And Yoshinori frowns.

And Hyunsuk’s heart burns.

·

Hyunsuk stares at your smile. Feels the burn, remembers that you aren’t the one he likes – remembers that it could change.

His heart begins to burn. Searing against bones.

His breath catches.

This is his third mistake.

·

Hyunsuk asks Yedam about it days later, if it’s okay to move on quickly, and if it’s okay with like you – “people move on differently, it depends on the person, it depends on you. Everyone has their own process.” Smiles at Hyunsuk and continues walking. Meeting Asahi again, this time with Yoshinori.

Yoshinori isn’t Yoshinori without you, that’s what Hyunsuk thinks. Doesn’t realize you and Yoshinori walk different paths in life.

Trails behind.

Until he sees you.

Leaning against Yoshinori’s shoe locker. With two containers in your hand. And two strawberries milks atop them.

Face brightening up at Yoshinori. Heart burning, wishing it were him. You hand Yoshinori the container, fingers pressing tightly around it. Releasing it into his hands.

You give a strawberry milk to Hyunsuk.

You sit between them, and Hyunsuk watches the way the sun catches your hair when it shines bright in the sky. Heart aching, he decides to write you a letter – but this time, it isn’t for someone else. This one is for you.

·

“Do you like Hyunsuk?” Yoshinori asks quietly.

You’re sitting across from him. His eyes are tender, too soft to hurt you. Your hand curls tightly around your pencil, biting the side of your cheek, something bitter tinges your tongue. “W– what do you mean?”

His head tilts, drops to the chest. “You didn’t give me milk today… That sounds childish saying it out loud.”

You smile, but it feels strained. Your gut recoils, and you feel strange.

It’s been weeks since the letter. It’s felt like days – the more you think about the letter, the less you think of Yoshinori.

Instead all that fills your head is the smell of parchment paper that held the scent of strawberries, and Hyunsuk and if he’ll ever dye his hair green.

“I don’t… I don’t know.” It’s quiet. And Yoshinori stares, “you should tell him.”

Your breath hitches. Face twisting, you become upset because – because… You like Yoshinori. You do. You want him to be with you. You do. But Hyunsuk is there, here, he’s everywhere. Hyunsuk makes you feel warm and fuzzy and Yoshinori – “I liked you, Yoshinori.”

His face pales. He stiffens, and you know. Like you’ve always known.

You begin collecting your things. “Don’t say anything, okay? I know. I always knew. I… We were always just friends.”

Your eyes dampen when you walk away.

You think of Hyunsuk and wonder if he’ll ever dye his hair.

You think of Hyunsuk and wonder if he’ll ever hold your hand.

If he’ll ever just make a move.

You think of Hyunsuk. And he’s all you can really think of lately.

·

Hyunsuk writes you a letter.

He feels his heart ache and burn.

Thinks of your hair and your hands and you.

·

You’re almost at the school gates when Jihoon notices you.

You remember parts of him – he likes dancing, drawing, and he’s good at those things. His excitement rolls onto everyone around him, and he can make you smile and anyone else. You remember he’s friend with Hyunsuk and he’s easy to get along with – “Goodmorning!” You bow slightly. And it makes him laugh a bit.

“That felt so formal… Never do that again.”

Your voice stutters. Chin ducking, hitting your chest. “… Am I really that formal?”

“Try extremely reserved,” He jokes, it makes you smile. Face reddening, hands curling around your bags. “What’s for lunch?“ His chin lifts, gesturing to your brown paper bag.

“A sandwich.”

You shuffle between feet, hearing him mumble quietly, “Aw.”

“You should go, the bell will ring soon, don’t want to take up your precious time!” He wraps an arm around your shoulders, pushes you gently through the gates.

You wonder about Hyunsuk.

“Jihoon… Um… Hyunsuk, is – do you think… Do you think he likes me…?”

Your chewing your lip. Staring at the way his head tilts, at the way a smile grows on his face.

“Why don’t you ask him?”

You ‘oh’ softly, taking slow steps backwards. Nodding, before you twist around.

“… Ask him?”

·

He catches a glimpse of you at lunch.

Eating outside, sitting on a bench. Cherry blossoms fall, and it’s heart pounding. Smiles a little at your fingers pulling back the flesh of a manderine.

Opening the door, he walks to you. Maybe too quickly. Too rushed. But his heart is pounding loudly in his ears, his chest burns and wildfire is spreading across his body.

He practically throws the letter at you. It’s in a light green envelope. A sloppy drawn heart at the centre, slanted.

Eyes shut tight. Face tinged pink.

“I love you [reader]!”

That’s his fourth mistake.

Helikes you. But that works too.

Then he’s running. Towards the entrance doors. Pulling it open and letting it slam shut.

You face bursts into flames. Your heart swells and your stomach flutters.

His hair is green. A very bright green.

·

You read the letter during your last period.

There’s an extra layer of timidness in your fingers when they tear open the envelope.

Your whole body seizes. Your heart drums, and your fingers are running over his writing.

You look beautiful every day. My first letter, it wasn’t for you – but I’m glad I gave it to you. You like green. I did it BTW, dyed my hair. You’ll probably see, or have seen? I talked to you, I know you. Or at least, I like to think I do. Here are some things I know – 1. You like fruit, you pull the skin off of manderines slow, and you eat strawberries like they’re too sweet 2. You like the color black, because it’s every color. I think 3. You’re more reserved than anyone I’ve ever met, you remind me of an old person, in the best way 4. You look beautiful, that’s a given. You’ve always been beautiful and I’ve just never noticed 5. You’re everywhere, I’m just blind 6. You might like me. I don’t know. Not yet. I hope you do. If not, that’s okay too. I’ll understand. But. I think you’re beautiful and I think I’m a bad letter writer? See. I don’t know how to write.

You look beautiful every day. I like you. I think we’d go sweetly together. Let me walk you home.

Your not-so secret admirer, Hyunsuk.

Your knees knock together. Your heart bursts and your stomach knots.

He didn’t like you, but he does now. You think that’s okay, and you also think, maybe it isn’t.

Your heart has already decided.

You’re walking home with Hyunsuk.

·

He waits. At the school gates. Starked off in his uniform. Waits and waits. Feels a quiet nervousness swirl in his gut.

Doesn’t notice you walking toward him. Two strawberry milks in your arms and the letter in between your fingers.

“… Hey.”

The world slows down for Hyunsuk.

“Will you walk me home?”

Hyunsuk’s heart pounds and he smiles. Nervousness fading away, ebbing into less.

He nods, watches you hold out a strawberry milk. Takes it, fingertips brushing against your palm.

“Okay… I’ll walk you home,”

What he means is, I like you so much.

·

Hyunsuk walks you home.

Kisses you slow. Tastes like strawberries. Reminds you of Summer.

No – you lean in first. Eyes closed when your lips touch. Your hand twisting at the fabric of his shirt, palm warm over his chest. Pulling away slow.

“… Are you okay?” You ask, hand covering his. “I… Just really like you.” Face flushed red, you smile. Kiss him once more. Tasting of strawberries. Reminds you of Summer.

(#readerchan: i’m sorry :(

#main protagonist: finally, i thought you were never going to apologize

#readerchan: WHY DIDN’T YOU APOLOGIZE THEN

#main protagonist: I didn’t want to <3).

·

In his last year of high school, Hyunsuk makes mistake of accidentally confessing to the wrong person. Everything turns out okay.