*Do not replicate/rework/translate my work anywhere else without my express permission. This story is on A03/Tumblr/Wattpad. Anywhere else, it is likely stolen.*
I had to get out of here.
Swinging like meat on a hook was not on my to-do list today so I did the only thing I could and started moving my legs to get some momentum. Higher and higher, I swung until I grabbed onto one of the hooks and started trying to use the point to saw the ropes.
It took me so long to even get some fraying on it but I lost my grip halfway through and ended up spinning as I fell away from the hook. My sawing had done enough though because the rope unravelled with my weight pulling against it and I hit the carpeted floor hard. I landed on my left wrist and there was a sharp pain up my forearm but I didn’t think I’d broken it.
I tried pushing up using my left hand and there was a grating feeling in my bones as I got to my feet but I was okay. I was alive.
Really, you should have expected to be rudely awakened by your phone ringing loud enough to wake the dead because that’s just the way your life tended to be. Honestly, the only thing that shouldn’t have shocked you was the only thing that did: the fact that John just continued to snooze away beneath you despite the affronting noise and the way you thrashed around while trying to silence it. If your mind was more functioning, you might have traded the befuddlement about your ex-husband for concern; how much sleep had the man missed out on lately?
Still, even half-awake you managed to hit the ‘dismiss’ button without so much as looking at the screen. Tired and annoyed, you flopped back down on John’s chest. There was just enough of a lull between bouts of your phone shrieking that you started to nod back off before the blasted thing started back up again.
This time, you snapped awake fully. Your phone never rang twice this close together unless there was some sort of emergency. As soon as you lifted it and actually read the caller ID, you sat up ramrod straight, voice perfectly clear when you asked, “What’s wrong?”
“It’s happening again.”
“Spirits?”
“Attached to my kid brother; I think they followed him from Nanda Parbat. I don’t care about seeing them; I don’t like that they’re violent and stuck to him.”
“It’s still not good that you’re still seeing them at all.”
“Chalk it up to the way I came back. Universe bullshit. Doesn’t matter. Will you come?”
“Of course. I’ll be there sometime tonight.” Your eyes slid over to John and noticed he was awake and had one eyebrow raised. “Might have a tag-along or two if you’re okay with it.”
“You trust them?”
“You could say tha,” you replied, eyes locked onto John’s.”
“Then bring them. I’ll be at the warehouse.”
“See you then.”
“Secret boyfriend?” John prompted as you got to your feet and started pulling on pants.
You laughed. “Only secret I’ve got these days is you, Johnny. He’s more like a brother. Been seeing violent spirits off and on since the universe brought him back from the dead after six months in the ground.”
He blinked in surprise. “Not something you see everyday.”
“Not in the slightest. Anyway, he’s seen something attached to his baby brother and given the origin, I don’t blame him for wanting them gone.”
Now, he roled out of the bed and yanked on his trousers. “So where’re we headed, luv?”
You tossed him his shirt with a smirk. “Gotham.”
~
Zed, as it turned out, had never been to the ‘dark, gloomy cesspool that is Gotham,’ and as such decided to tag along. You suspected that she was also eager to gain more information about you while she had the chance. Miraculously, she didn’t bring up what she’d seen in the kitchen the night before, of which you were quite grateful. You didn’t know what you’d say to explain it given everything else that was currently on your mind.
So instead of questions about the fact that you’d fucked your ex-husband, she filled the time with questions about Gotham.
“So, this place is the one with all the super weird bad guys, right?”
“Yep.”
“And you’ve been there before?”
“I live there part of the time.”
“Youlivethere? I thought John said–”
“That the place is the closest thing to Hell I’ve ever managed to find on Earth?” John cadded cheerfully.
“I never said it was nice.”
You didn’t turn around to look at her since you were driving, but from the pause, you assumed she was gaping at you. Then she asked, “And we’re going to help some random guy?”
“He’s a friend of mine, but yes. Basically.”
John turned around in his seat to ask Zed in a far-too-excited bvoice, “Do you already know about the man who runs around in a bat costume calling himself a hero?”
“What?”
“Yeah, there’s a whole family of them,” he cackled.
‘Okay, only one of them dresses like a bat,” you argued.
“How many of these vigilantes are we talking about?”
“Well there’s the Bat himself, Batgirl, Robin, Nightwing–”
“Nightwing’s in Bludhaven these days.”
“Spoiler I think, RedRobin, Signal, and Red Hood.”
“And there’s still that much crime?”
“Some people think the crime might be becauseof all the vigilantes.”
“Anyway,” you cut back in, “hopefully we won’t be there long enough for you to worry about it. I try to avoid most of them.”
John scoffed as he lit a cigarette with a small tongue of hellfire. “Knowing our luck?” he questioned doubtfully.
You just groaned.
~
Now, you knew full well who you were going to help, but that you didn’t mean that you were expecting Red Hood to be waiting in full gear in the warehouse when you pulled the car in.
Before anyone got out, Zed just stared at the masked man through the windshield. “I thought we were trying to avoid these guys.”
“I said we were going to try to avoid worrying about them,” you corrected, unbuckling your seatbelt, “as in not getting in their way.”
“You couldn’t have mentioned that we were coming to help the bloody Red Hood?”
“I’ll explain later,” was all you said before climbing out of the vehicle. “We doing this whole thing as alter-egos?” you asked as you strolled right up to the masked vigilante.
“You sure you truest these guys?”
“I promise your shit won’t even be in the same league of weird as the rest we’ve got going on.”
“That a yes?”
“Yeah, you can trust ‘em,” you said with a smirk thrown over to John as he moved to stand beside you.
“She mentioned you came back from the dead through the Universe’s meddling,” your ex commented abruptly “If that’s the case, why do you have the stink of a Lazarus Pit on you?”
“Constantine, maybe you shouldn’t be questioning the man with the guns,” Zed muttered from John’s other side.
“Another good question from our resident psychic. I thought your lot hated guns. Aren’t you supposed to be a hero?”
Hood gave a dark chuckle as he removed his helmet.. “You know, you’re exactly like she said.”
“Handsome and devilishly charming?”
Now he removed the domino, eyes glowing a dangerous Lazarus green with his anger. “Cocky and infuriating.”
John laughed. “There’sthose pretty green eyes. I’ll give you, you’re prettier to look at than the last Pit infected bastard I came across.”
“Okay boys, put ‘em away,” you interrupted. “Jace, you owe me a hug.”
With an amused huff, he squeezed you in a welcoming embrace. “You bailed on me to be with this guy?”
“World ending drama. You don’t wanna know. Jason, meet John Constantine. My ex-husband. John, Jason Todd. Basically my little brother at this point.”
“The guns are to get shit done,” Jason said in lieu of offering a handshake.
You rolled your eyes. “Not the point of us coming down here. The effects of the Pit can’t be removed without basically killing him, so we won’t be doing that.”
Thatmade John pause the antagonistic air he’d been giving off. Clearly, he hadn’t expected to hear that; after all, Ra’s never had that sort of issue. “Alright, then whose ghosts arewe trying to get rid of?”
“I’d like to know who my other guest is first, if you don’t mind.”
“Zed,” she offered along with her hand.
You lunged to shove that hand back down to her side. “No, we’re not doing that. She’s basically a touch telepath,” you informed Jason.
He paled. “Yeah, no. Sweetheart, you don’t wanna be digging around in my head. Coming back from the dead isn’t pretty.”
You breathed a relieved sigh. You’d been in his head enough to know how bad that might have been, specifically the little part about him digging himself out of his own grade. Not lingering on it, you asked, “So where is the Littlest Assassin?”
“Upstairs. I told him, so he’d be able to keep an eye out for anything that looks like a string of bad luck.”
“And who is this boy?”
“My little brother, Damian.”
“Wait …” John’s eyebrows furrowed. “Jason … and Damian …” His eyes slid over to you. “You got mixed up with the goddamn Wayne family?”
Jason shared a pointed look with you before answering. “That’s a story for another time.”
You nodded in aggreance. “We’re not getting into it right now. Let’s just get Dami squared away.”
~
“You met the Wayne family in Tibet of all places?” John asked incredulously on the drive back to the millhouse.
“I’m not getting into it.”
“And you decided to fuck thisguy,” Zed shoved the back of John’s seat, “over that tall drink of water we just left?”
“Jace is just a friend, Zed.”
“Wait, if Jason Todd is Red Hood and Damian Wayne is Robin, does that mean Batman is Bruce Wayne?”
“Yes, and if you blab about it I’ll make sure he knows who did it.”
~
“What the hell did you get mixed up in after we split?” John asked you over drinks in the living room after Zed retired for the evening.
“You mean after the divorce,” you pointed out between sips of your whiskey.
He rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”
“Story for another time, John. Life moved on, and that’s all you need to worry about right now.”
“We’ll I’d like to know if I’m going a have that attractive, well-muscled, well-armedlad hunting me down for doing this.”
Then his lips were on yours and your brain was shorting out for several seconds. When you parted, though, your reasoning skills flooded right back to the front of your thoughts.
“John, we can’t do this.”
“Why not?”
It was hard to think straight when his breath was mingling with yours.
“You know why.”
“Do we really still care? I’m damned to Hell either way.”
You searched his gaze for any doubt. “Are you sure?”
“Only thing I was more sure of was when I asked you to marry me.”
Summary: You make some decisions, and Zed finds out about some things.
He was lying on his back with his hands folded casually behind his head and wearing nothing more than an undershirt and boxers when you closed the door behind you. The moment the latch clicked, he raised an eyebrow. “So what room were youtrying to be in, luv? Because I’m sure you weren’t angling to end up in here.”
“The library,” you shrugged, “though I can’t say I’m complaining very much about the view.” You allowed your eyes to trail up his body, thoroughly enjoying the sight laid out before you.
“Should we really be doing this?” he questioned as you stepped closer.
“Probably not.” Your jacket dropped to the floor. “We separated for a reason, didn’t we?”
“A rather good one, if I recall correctly.” His big, brown eyes were glued to the skin you exposed as you removed your shirt.
“So I have to ask, do you really care about those reasons anymore?”
Your pants came off next, causing John to swallow thickly. “I don’t really give a damn about what we should do anymore.”
“Then we’re on the same page,” you stated, just standing beside the bed, waiting for him to make the next move.
“Brilliant,” was the last intelligent word exchanged between the pair of you before he seized your hips and dragged you down on top of him.
God, you’d missed this man.
~
“Youlook like you had a good time,” Zed commented when John stepped half-naked into the kitchen.
Glancing at the clock, he noticed that it was almost three in the morning. “Shouldn’t you be asleep?”
“And who are you, my father?”
“I fucking hope not,” he muttered as he grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge.
“You’redrinking water? She must have really worn you out,” Zed observed.
He sighed, eyes sliding shut in defeat. “What do I have to do for you to keep quiet about this?”
“Tell me who she is.”
“My ex,” he stated unhelpfully. “We done?” He knew full well that wouldn’t be enough to satisfy Zed’s burning curiosity, but he was still mildly annoyed when she blocked his attempted getaway. A harsh exhale left his nose. “Fine. Got anything specific you’re wanting to know, then? I’ll give you two freebies.”
“Five.”
“One.”
“Three.”
“Deal. Ask, so I can get some sleep.”
“Gotta get back to her, huh?” Zed teased.
His eyebrows started crawling to his hairline of their own accord. “That one of your questions?”
Her smile fell at his tone. No teasing John tonight, then. “No. Okay, she’s your ex-what? Girlfriend, roommate, lover …? Everyone’s been impressively vague so far.”
“Wife. Next?”
Zed looked like he just pulled the rug out from under her. Wide eyes, slack jaw, pretty much every textbook sign of someone being completely flabbergasted could be found on her face. Wisely, she didn’t use one of her remaining questions on clarifying that.
“Okay … She seems like quite an interesting person.”
“She is.”
“That wasn’t my question.”
“I know. It wasn’t a question at all.”
She rolled her eyes. “So how did you two meet?”
His eyes slid to the ceiling in almost a slow motion version of what she’d just done. “I had a job. Demon was causing problems in what turned out to be her neck of the woods. I had a friend call me in to help; she beat me to it. Got along like hellfire right from the start.”
That phrasing didn’t escape Zed. The Hellblazer himself–as she’d once had a vision of him being called–comparing anythingto hellfire wasn’t a usual occurrence, let alone once that was coupled with that vision you’d made her see … Still, there was one question burning on her tongue to ask before she could even dream of bugging him into elaborating why hellfire of all things kept popping up around the pair of them.
“Why did you break up?”
“When you’re done talking about marriage, it’s called divorce, just so you know.”
“What I know is that you’re stalling for time.”
John groaned, knowing she had him but still he tried to sidestep. “It was best for both of us.”
“Really?” Zed’s eyebrows were creeping upwards. “Because as Chas tells it, you went into one hell of a spiral after the divorce, and that’s not something you do when it’s mutual. And I’m not accepting that pathetic excuse for a sentence as an answer, by the way.”
“We got a divorce because of my family,” you announced as you stepped out of the hallway’s deep shadows.
Zed didn’t miss the way a light appeared in John’s brown eyes at the sight of you. It was a light that only got brighter when you moved closer and kissed him soundly. The way your fingers down his chest during the exchange almost made Zed look away, because that little caress changed the tone from purely lustful to something too intimate for onlookers.
“I was coming right back, luv.”
“You took too long,” you shrugged before stealing his water and taking a long gulp, “and I was thirsty.”
“What about your family made you get a divorce?” Zed found herself asking. “And you two seem awful close for being divorced.”
“Both of those things fall firmly under the ‘my business’ umbrella, and not the ‘our business’ one, Z,” you informed her.
“What if that’s why I keep having visions of you? Doesn’t that make it my business?”
“No, that makes you a peeping tom.” You sighed. “Look, if it seems like that’s what we need to stop this Rising Darkness bullshit, I’ll loop you in.” It wasn’t a difficult decision to make, all things said; your issues could be shelved if the information needed to be shared. Until then, it would remain firmly between you and John.
Then you felt him kiss your temple sweetly, and all of your attention shifted back to him, the man that’d just slung his arm around your shoulders like he always did back in the day. “Well on that lovely, invasive note, we all need to get some sleep.”
Zed blinked, clearly taken aback by the overt subject change. “Goodnight, I guess.”
“Remember our deal. I don’t want to hear a word about this tomorrow.”
You laughed. “Right, just let us leave our own bad decisions in the past.”
Already, the pair of you were strolling down the hall back to John’s room, no doubt leaving a baffled seer in your wake.
“In the past, huh?” you teased, linking your fingers with the ones he had dangling over your shoulder.
“Well …” He turned to smirk at you. “We’ll see. Besides, the night’s not over yet.”
When you stepped into the millhouse, it was exactly the same as the last time you saw it, right down to that strange mirror over the fireplace. You knew John was out working on his latest gig, but you expected to run into at least someoneout and about in the place. Still, you weren’t upset at the chance to poke around.
It was a little concerning how many decanters were in the old liquor cabinet. The copious amounts of cigarette butts in the ashtray, however, weren’t too uncommon for the chain-smoking exorcist.
“Hello?” That was Chas’s voice coming from down the hall, growing closer as he threatened, “I know you’re here, so you’d best show yourself before I get nasty.
“I thought getting nasty was usually John’s gig,” you teased as he finally stepped into view.
Blankly, he stared at you for a moment before saying your name in an utterly confused tone.
“That’s still me, boyo,” you confirmed, allowing him to scoop you into a tight hug.
“What’re you doinghere?” he asked with a laugh while he stepped back from you. “You here for John?”
“In a manner of speaking,” you replied hesitantly, not wanting to get his hopes up about your sudden reappearance. “Signs keep pointing me back to you lot, so I figured I’d let you know I’m around since I doubt John’s mentioned it.”
“He’ll be happy you’re back,” he stated, practically confirming that John was being pretty tight-lipped about your involvement in this whole Rising Darkness affair.
“Chas …”
He muttered your name quietly before asking softly ,“Why did you leave him? One day, you two are crazy about each other, and the next you’re getting a divorce? I mean the guy clearly misses you. What could possibly–”
“You’re her,” a new voice interrupted him from the other side of the room. The new arrival, the seer Zed if you had to wager, scurried closer to get a better look at you. “You’re the woman I keep seeing.”
“So I’ve heard,” your voice was cold, a little unnecessarily so, but it was hard not to be frigid when you were actively glaring at Chas to keep the past to himself.
Zed’s eyes kept trailing up and down your body like she was looking for something specific. “Who the hell are you, anyway? Why do I keep seeing youof all people?”
You couldn’t help it, your icy façade broke apart as a laugh bubbled up from your chest at the bluntness of her questions.
“Ah, I was wondering where you’d gotten off to, luv,” John said, gesturing extravagantly as he breezed into the room. “Zed, I’d like you to meet my ex, the absolute nightmare that she is.” Even though his mouth and expression implied distaste for you, you could see the way his gaze lingered on the chain around your neck, on your lips for just a fraction of a second longer than was socially appropriate. “This cruel little lady is here to help you with your abilities, Zed.”
Looking at him, you raised an eyebrow as if to ask, “Oh am I?” but you didn’t argue.
Zed’s dark eyes lit up a little. “You’re like me?” she guessed.
“Not exactly.” When she deflated a little, you continued, “I’ve got a different set of skills, but I understand how yours works. I should be able to give you a few pointers.”
“Then we’ll leave you to it.” John’s hand came down hard on Chas’s shoulder. “Let’s go see about that taxi of yours, shall we?”
It was only the once they were gone that Zed stated, “I keep seeing you and John together in my visions.”
“So I’ve heard.”
“But I can never tell if it’s the past or the future.”
“Knowing the difference is a skill you’ll have to develop. Once you reallystart paying attention, you’ll find that they feel different; something about them just resonates on a different level. As for me and Constantine, what you’re seeing is in the past,” you lied, casually mixing truth with fiction. As far as Zed–and the rest of the planet, honestly–was concerned, there was nothing between you and your ex-husband anymore.
Her eyes narrowed a little. “I’m sorry, being around John has totally killed my manners. We still haven’t been introduced properly. I’m Zed,” she stated, offering you her hand to shake.
Instead of humoring her, you crossed your arms as you offered your own name. “And you seem like a smart enough woman to realize how incredibly rude it is to try and read someone without their permission.”
She shrugged, only deigning to look mildly apologetic. “Can’t blame a girl for trying. Everyone’s been suspiciously cagey with information about you.”
You stared at her for a moment, assessing the situation as a whole. There was every possibility your next move would backfire directly in your face, but the temptation was simply too much to resist. “Alright,” you announced, offering your hand.
Now it was Zed’s turn to look distrustful. “You justsaid–”
“And now I’m giving you permission,” you pointed out, “if you think you can handle it.”
She laughed. “Well, I’ve never been one to run away from a challenge,” was all she said before grasping your hand.
Immediately, she gasped at the onslaught of information, and thanks to your own gifts you could see exactly what was swarming her mind and even control it to a degree.
The most overwhelming thing in the vision was the impossibly hot, scarlet red fire that tore through her mind. Hellfire, the very thing that thrived in your veins at every moment, the thing it’d taken you years to learn how to control once you first awakened that power. It was only throughthat punishing fire that a few hazy memories leaked through your control for Zed to see.
The day John proposed, a few times you’d seen his old band perform, things like that. The instant that Zed was able to make out the bare, sweat-covered skin of John’s chest, she reflexively jerked away from you.
This time, you raised your eyebrows in challenge. “See what you wanted?”
“What was that?” she gasped as she fought her spasming lungs to gulp air down.
“I’m gonna go out on a limb and assume you’re not asking about the mechanics of sex. Let’s just say that’s the reason you don’t go through people’s heads if you don’t know anything about them. Consider that your first lesson. You never know if your target is someone like me that can control what you see. They can make you see nonsense, or they might be able to trick you into seeing something that never happened.”
“Thefire?”
You smirked. “Maybe someday you’ll figure it out. But you managed to squeeze out a few memories from me at least, which is more than I expected. John’s handiwork?”
Her face darkened in a blush, no doubt recalling the last memory she saw of what you thought might have been the last night you and John were together. “He’s been the one helping me until now.:”
“Not terrible for a beginner,” you admitted. “Go get some rest, Zed; you look exhausted.”
She nodded. “Good idea. You gonna be sticking around?”
“Depends on if John and I are going to kill each other or not,” you lied again while on the inside, you knew that the pair of you were unlikely to part again anytime soon. For better or worse, your fates were tied together once more; you could feel that much in your very soul.
And based on the way the millhouse rearranged itself so that the door that should have led to the old library actually opened up into John’s messy bedroom, it knew that as well as you did.
Maybe it was that the pair of you were still riding high and distracted from the fact that you were remarried. Maybe it was just plain bad luck. Either way, a run-of-the-mill evil hunt had spun completely out of control and led to John lying limp and bleeding in your arms with Zed flickering at the edge of consciousness next to you.
Across from you stood the culprit: a demon of middling power that managed to get its hands on a sword that rendered the wielder almost immortal. Nothing John threw at it landed (magical or physical), and any visions Zed managed to have only showed the lot of you dead at its feet.
“At last,” it was monologuing, “the great John Constantine will take his rightful place in the bowels of Hell.”
Zed was just blinking herself awake fully when she saw you stand. All she could do was watch in horror as flames–those same flames she’d seen in your mind so long ago–started writhing around her entire body. Inwardly, Zed wondered what the hell she’d been living with for the last few months. You’d displayed power, sure, but nothing like this.
Outwardly, the demon expressed a similar train of thought as you stormed towards it. Within moments, it found itself simply vaporized, sword or no sword, by the hellfire that seemed to be pouring from every part of you. Later, the lot of you would figure that the sword couldn’t protect from power that matches that of the wielder. Meaning a demon could still be killed by demonic power.
For now, though, the threat of the randomdemon had passed, but the threat of youwas still fully present since you were showing no sign of calming down.
“John,” Zed called weakly, praying her friend was still awake enough to stop his wife.
“I know!” His voice sounded strangled, probably by the pain, but still he was already struggling to his feet. Leave it to John to keep pushing forward despite his injuries. The fire he was approaching was still concerning; Zed only hoped he knew what he was doing by just boldly walking towards her.
Meanwhile, John was almost too worried about you to feel the various injuries that littered his body. Almost. Every part of his face aching was still quite literally painfully present in his awareness. The rest, though, irrelevant as he carefully stepped into the swirling vortex of hellfire. Small blessings that he was immune to your main weapon of choice, he supposed.
“Luv, it’s over,” he tried to say, but his voice was drowned out by the crackling flame. Gritting his teeth, he reached out and took your hand in an attempt to get your attention. Your eyes were solid black when they landed on his. “I’m alright,” he said as loudly as he could manage. “Might not look it, but a couple days and I’ll be right as rain. You can stop now.”
This was what the pair of you had been afraid of when you first realized just how important the other was to you. Neither could ever be sure how they’d react to something happening to the other. It was the real reason for the divorce all those years ago, the hidden one below all the layers of lies.
“Relationship differences,” was the surface one you actually told people, the one that no one that knew you believed.
“Being with a demon-blooded human was a certain way to damn John’s soul,” the partial truth, the one no one had ever tried to look past to get to the real truth.
“The sight of the one you loved potentially dying was enough to send you flying off the handle potentially on a world-ending scale since one of you was part demon and the other was a powerful mage,” that was the truly terrifying one.
The fire calmed finally. The swirling slowed to a stop.
“John?” came your terrified voice. Ironic, considering that you were the only remaining threat.
“Who else?” he said with a tired smirk.
A tiny smile graced your features before your eyes rolled back in your head and you collapsed.
John merely waved off Zed’s scared yelp of your name as he knelt beside your prone form. You’d be fine; that fall wasn’t enough to really hurt you. Normally, he would have tried to catch you, but that dislocated shoulder and broken arm of his simply wouldn’t allow it. “It’s alright, sweetheart,” he muttered while digging his phone out of his pocket with his good hand. “I’ll get Chas on his way.”
It was only once everyone was back in the car on the way home that Zed finally asked the question that had been burning her tongue since you first lost control. “What … just happened?”
John just shook his head, clearly not wanting to talk about it.
Which prompted Chas to ask, “It finally happen?”
“… Yeah …” He squeezed your still-limp hand.
“Was it her?”
“Yeah.”
Chas hesitated. “You’re not planning on leaving her again are you?”
“No,” John denied without hesitation. “Never. We’ll deal with whatever happens as it comes.”
You were the one that responded to that with a croaked, “Good.”
You woke in the morning feeling like you got hit by a bus. That’d be the drinking, you’d wager. Already, you felt the old, formerly familiar weight of a ring on your wedding finger, but that was something to be analyzed when you didn’t feel like death warmed over. You gracelessly flopped your hand behind you to see if John was still there.
Based on the annoyed grunt when your palm met skin, John was in fact in bed with you.
“You awake?” you grumbled.
“Unfortunately.” His arm came tourist around your waist, pulling your back against his chest.
“Any chance you know a spell for hangovers?”
“Only one that causes them,” was all he murmured before kissing your shoulder.
“Why did I marry you?”
It felt like the pair of you tensed up at exactly the same time. Your eyes snapped wide open despite the pain caused by the dim light that managed to slip through the curtain; you could only assume he looked the same in that instant. Your hand trailed down slowly to squeeze his upper thigh.
“By any chance, do you recall us quite responsibly using a teleportation spell while we were drinking last night?”
“By any chance, do you recall us getting married and having an argument with Zed last night?” you countered.
“I do.” There was a pause that was only filled with him kissing the back of your neck. “Any regrets?”
You rolled over so you could kiss him firmly on the lips before promising, “Never. I stand by what I said last night.” You were pretty sure you said it, at least. “You’re it for me, John Constantine.”
An uncharacteristically genuine smile spread across his handsome face. “I’m yours. For better or worse, sweetheart. Hell or not, dangeror not, I’m not letting you slip through my fingers again.”
His grin was apparently infectious because you found yourself mirroring it. You traced his cheekbone with your thumb. “I love you.”
That beaming smile turned knowing; he was well aware that that tone almost always came with a favor being requested. “Love you too. Let me guess. Coffee?”
Summary: Life decisions based on 5 word sentences are questionable at best
Bad ideas didn’t exclusively come in little, five-word statements in the middle of the night while a few steps past tipsy, but that was a guaranteed way to come up with them. “We should buy a bar,” “I want to steal that,” “I thought you were single,” … “We should get remarried.” You know, normal, little sentences. The last was the most relevant right after that mess with Ritchie, because that was all the tempting it took for you and John to teleport to Vegas and make it happen.
The pair of you were still giggling to yourselves in blind happiness when you got back home. And ‘getting back home’ meant stepping back through the portal of swirling darkness into the living room where Zed was apparently hanging out.
“What the hell?!” she shouted in alarm. “What is going on? Where did you come from? When did you leave?”
“Teleportation, sweetheart. Try to keep up,” he slurred with a vague wave of his hand.
“Since when can you teleport?”
“He can’t,” you snickered. “I can because of my …” you waved broadly at your body, “bullshit. I can drag him through because he’s John fucking Constantine.”
His smirk was better classified as a leer when you glanced at him. “Well,” he drawled. “Not ‘fucking’ currently, anyway.”
“Okay, okay, okay,” Zed focused both of your straying attention by speaking quickly. “I kept quiet that one night because you asked me to, but we’re wellpast that now. What is going onwith you two?!”
“We got married!” you announced happily. The way you moved your hand to display your rings’ return to their rightful place on your finger jostled John from where he was trying to kiss your neck. All you did was shush his complaining grumble. You were goingto enjoy announcing this while your buzz lasted, and you’d be damned if he distracted you from it.
Zed looked confused. “Weren’t you already married?”
“My darling wifemeans to say that we gotremarried,” John corrected. “As in married again”
“For the second time!” you chirped.
“… Is that a good idea? Didn’t you get divorced for a reason?” Zed’s concern was obvious. “I mean, you wouldn’t do that just for nothing.”
You frowned. “And we’re back together for a reason. If you’re not going to be happy for us,” you leaned over the couch to grab the bottle of whiskey that was resting on the coffee table, “we’re going to our bedroom to start our honeymoon.”
“I like this plan!” John announced, planting a smack of a kiss on your cheek. “Let’s see if we can recreate the first one, shall we?”
“And I like thatplan. You think you can still do that thing with your hips?”
“That and more, sweetheart.”
Dimly, you were aware of Chas’s voice asking, “What’s going on?” as you and John strolled down the hall, his fingers already trying to pry open your pants.
You were lounging in the living room, enjoying a drink with John when an unexpected chill raced down your spine. This chill was similar but oh-so-unwelcomely different than most others you’d felt in your life. Overall, it was the same … except for the sparks of electricity that danced painfully along your ribs as it passed.
“You alright, luv?”
There was likely no small amount of hostility in your gaze when you searched around the room for the source of your pain. “You making friends with angels behind my back?”
“Bloody hell …” It felt like every muscle in John’s body stiffened upon hearing that question, but his voice was still that Constantine-branded casual when he said, “Friend would be a mighty strong choice of word for it.”
“John, I’m disappointed,” a new masculine voice sounded as a dark-skinned angel appeared in the room with you.
“About us not being friends?” John scoffed. “You really shouldn’t be surprised.”
The angel rolled his eyes. “And here I’d heard that you’d come to your senses when you cut ties with this … filth.” The way he spat the word reminded you of the way one might discuss the finding of a rat in one’s dinner. “Yet you’re decided to start–what’s the phrase–slumming it … again.”
You could see John’s jaw flexing with his anger. “That’s none of your business,” you snapped before he could say anything that might get him killed.
“It is when the reasonhe got involved in stopping the Rising Darkness was to save his soul!”
The icy chill was back, but this one was born purely out of fear. “What?”
“If you wanted her out of it, maybe you shouldn’t have let literally everything point to the fact that we needed her,” came John’s sharp reply.
Now, it was the angel’s turn to be unpleasantly surprised. “What are you talking about?”
The laugh that left John’s mouth was a harsh, cruel-sounding thing. “Of course you don’t know. Zed, your precious seer–you remember her, right?–was having visions about the two of us. Apparently, we need her to fight your precious Rising Darkness.”
Angel boy’s jaw clenched. “Have you checked the scry map?” Apparently, he didn’t feel like discussing his shortcomings on the Seer Knowledge front.
“No. In case you haven’t noticed, I was having a drink with this lovely lady.”
“Even God had a day off,” you pointed out, voice sickly-sweet as you trailed a finger down the arm John had looped around your shoulders.
“God rested because he’d finished creating the world. John’s job is just heating up.”
Immediately, the exorcist’s brow furrowed, but he let the angel keep talking.
“There’s an old friend you can still help, and it’s even in your own backyard.”
You felt your face twist in confusion. “Aren’t you lot usually more cryptic than that?”
He didn’t deign to so much as look at you; those golden eyes of his stayed locked on John.
“I’ve only got one friend in town … if you can call him that, but my lady’s right. You getting used to breaking Daddy’s rules?”
Saying nothing, the angel just vanished.
“… Well that went better than I expected,” John muttered.
You pulled away from him slightly. “So when were you planning on warning me about the feathery threat to my existence?”
“Oh, don’t be like that, luv. I try not to think about the bastard as much as I can, to be honest. Besides,” he pulled you back to him, directing you to move onto his lap so that you were straddling it instead of the casual, reclined position from before, “you know I’d never let him hurt you. Right?”
You scoffed, trying to add levity to his suddenly self-conscious tone. “Since when do I need your help to defend myself?”
At that, he barked a laugh. “To, right you are.” The pair of you shared a brief, fiery kiss before he guided you to your feet. “Now, come on. Ritchie needs our help!”
“It’sRitchiethat needs us?” you found yourself asking while being dragged down the hall. “Oh, he’s gonna lovethis …” Not.
~
The taped lecture was painfully boring even from outside the lecture hall. Yawns forced their way out of your mouth every few seconds, it felt like. When the tape finally messed up and Ritchie ended the class, you (and probably every student inside) inwardly rejoiced.
Waiting outside hadn’t been your idea in the slightest. No, you’d wanted to sit with John so you could at least mock whatever lecture Ritchie would put on and have something to keep yourself occupied that wasn’t just listening and twiddling your thumbs. But then John had to go and make the far-too-valid argument that you and Ritchie had never gotten along, so he would probably bolt the second he caught sight of you.
Hence, outside.
While listening to John’s pointless question to dramatically announce his present was amusing, when the time came, you filed out with the students. Crowds were truly brilliant for going unnoticed, after all, and John already had Ritchie’s attention firmly locked on him.
The plan was theoretically simple. He’d probe his old friend for as much information as he could manage on the way to Ritchie’s office. Where you’d already be inside waiting so you could catch him off guard. Then, fingers crossed, the three of you could figure out exactly what this mysterious danger was.
You were already done snooping around the office (finding nothing, naturally) and were lounging on the couch when you heard Ritchie’s once-familiar voice saying, “We had a … a deal. I help you and–” He abruptly cut himself off when he saw you. “Oh, no. No, no, no.” His eyes started frantically darting between the pair of you.
John flopped down next to you, arm automatically falling behind your head.
“You swore. You promised. No supernatural stuff, no demons–”
“Hey!” you protested at the same time John announced, “Gary’s dead, Ritchie.”
Ritchie’s whole body froze, full dear-in-the-headlights. “D… dead?”
“I’m sorry to spring it on you like that, mate, but, uh, now I have it on good authority that something ill-natured is circling you like a pack of wolves, and I’m not just gonna sit there and wait for it to attack.”
As John spoke, Ritchie moved to sit behind his desk, face full of confusion and shock. “Why me?” he muttered. “Why her? Why did you bring her here if something bad was already after me?”
“Because dealing with me is a right side better than ending up in a shallow grave because of something worse.” Your eyes narrowed. “Or are you forgetting all the times I’ve saved your ass?”
John’s hand squeezed your shoulder.
“But that’s no answer to why me. I don’t do anything but work and go hom, all of which is sprinkled with a whole lotta sedatives!”
What about the data-mining?”
“I got sick of frying hard drives! I don’t do it anymore! I shut the program down.”
“All this doesn’t change the fact that something bad is coming, Ritchie,” you pointed out calmly.
“Looks to me like something bad is already here,” came his mocking reply. “Careful how you speak to my wife.”
“You divorced yearsago, John! And for good reason. She’s a demon! It ain’t natural, and you know it!”
“She’s part demon, Ritchie, and you’d do well to remember that.” John’s tone was sharp, almost like he was moments from calling hellfire to those talented fingertips of his. When you squeezed his thigh to ground him, he relaxed some. “Besides, my reasons for parting with her died that day in Newcastle.”
“I’m here to help, Ritchie,” you vowed seriously. The hostility needed to tone itself down and quickly.
“Just–” His phone ringing cut him off. Convenient.
Based on his face, the news on the other end was anything but good. Of course.
~
Telling that young girl about her friend dying was easily one of the most emotionally traumatizing things you’d born witness to. Fortunately, after that it was quite easy to convince her to come to the millhouse.
“Don’t worry,” John was saying. “All reflective surfaces here have protections on them.”
“Get some rest while we work this out, alright?” you suggested.
“I’m sorry about all this.”
You waved her off. “Bah! You’re much better to deal with than Ritchie even with the whole evil ghost thing.” You winked at her. “He kinda hates me, if you haven’t noticed.”
“Why …” she trailed off as she seemed to realize that the answer wasn’t any of her business.
“You just get some rest. I’ll wrangle the magicians.”
Youknewit was going too well. The other shoe was bound to drop, yet when it did you were still surprised and horrified in equal measure when she was sucked into that hellish dimension through her phoneof all things.
Immediately, John started pulling out the supplies he’d need to do the spell. It was a little hard to hear anything over the blood racing in your ears, but you knew him and Ritchie were arguing about going in. But then you got dragged into it.
“She’s got mind powers, right?” You jerked your head around to see that Ritchie was pointing at you. “Why can’t she do it?”
John’s jaw clenched as his eyes met yours. “Her mind is too volatile. It’s overwhelming even to trained people; if she goes in we might lose Lily.”
“He’s right. I’d probably burn her out along with Shaw if he tried to get hold of me. Finesse is what’s needed, and that’s something I can’t do.” You looked at Ritchie. “If things go wrong, I’ll come in and be the battering ram. You two could handle it since you’ve got practice and warning, but it has to be a last resort sort of thing.”
He looked like he wanted to complain more, but Ritchie just sighed. “Fine.”
~
It was torture, watching the pair of them just … sit there in the trance.
It was pure Hell when John’s hands started bleeding. Still you didn’t try to enter. Lily was still alive. You had to hold out hope.
Then Lily came out. You patted her shoulder comfortingly but said nothing.
And finally, John came out of it and you immediately dropped into his lap to kiss him silly in relief despite the blood that lingered on his hands without wounds. “Good to see you too, luv, but I need you ready to drag him out incase the stupid git decides to try and stay there.”
You glanced over at Ritchie’s body. “You got it.”
But in the end, it all turned out … fine. Except for the dead kids. You’d all have to live with that on your conscience, but the three of them were alive. You were just happy to have them safe.
And if you and John got deliciously, irresponsibly, and hopelesslydrunk after toasting Gary’s memory in the mirror … Well that was your own business.
And the business of that one little walk-in chapel in Vegas.
