#dirt puma

titleknown:

So, I made a gross dirt puma!

For context, the Dirt Puma is based on John Hodgman’s* description of the species (As one of the Mole-Men’s horrible steeds) as a awful hairless burrowing cat + the use of a naked mole-rat for a picture of it! Which is why they’re a species our DM decided to give the drow (of a secretive underground shadow-magic-wielding branch) in our Eberron game as mounts!

Tho, this one is… not the most genetically sound. The idea is that in our tabletop game system we’re using (Monster of the Week), the options for my character’s vehicle include “Classic car in terrible condition,” but we had to convert it to a more fantasy-equivalent.

And since my character is a drow, and a dirt puma would presumably be their mount, they basically ended up as “a fucked up ‘purebred’ dirt puma”. Basically think the dirt puma equivalent of this monument to man’s hubris and you’re on the right track.

I tried to give ‘em aspects of brachycephalic cats, munchkin cats, scottish folds, basically all the genetically fucked-up cats, and I do wonder well I pulled off the whole “ugly-cute” vibe I was going for.

Either way, he’s presumably quite cuddly and friendly, but not very bright. So yeah!

*If you haven’t read his Complete World Knowlege series, you totally should, there’s a reason it was a huge influence on my work/aesthetics.

Update: I have finally given them a name and that name is Floppy.

They played a key role in a combat encounter by basically barreling into that week’s antagonist like a car. The antagonist then retaliated by using their wand that makes you see all possibilities (Long story) to give them an existential crisis.

Of course, when it wore off they went back to normal, because they are; again; not very bright…