#for years
okay fuck ALL personality type indicators u know of just forget them right now I have a new one for u and it’s really good
reblog and put IN THE TAGS!!!!! what ur costume was on ur first halloween (or like,, the first one u had a costume for)
yknow i think it would be really interesting if in the next game after sora is rescued from quadratum he goes through the same sort of zombie/catatonic stage ventus and roxas went through after their hearts were damaged to draw parallels to the beginnings of both of their stories and like. as he gets to be around the people he loves and was separated from again and really gets to know the people who were in his heart he begins to heal and discover himself again Or something like that….
Holster goes into Samwell thinking he’s gonna hate Jack because Jack’s soooo talented at hockey and soooo well connected and soooo rich but he actually hates Jack because Holster mentioned SNL and Jack was like “Oh. Is that … a class”
addition: Alicia Zimmermann has hosted SNL.
honestly the worst thing about adhd for me is that a new hobby or hyperfixation is one of the greatest sources of joy, but its always haunted by the knowledge that it won’t last and i don’t get to decide or even know how long. I can’t count on being interested in anything long term.
it feels like theres a clock ticking above my head and i cant see how much longer i get to enjoy something. i can’t start big projects for fear of never finishing them. i have to hold myself back from anything that requires long-term commitments or consistency because i can’t rely on future-me to follow through.*
when i pace myself and try to casually keep up with something after the hyperfixation ends it just isn’t the same, the joy is gone. when i say fuck it and just let myself run, i end up trying to cram years of a hobby into weeks or months. i bite off way more than i can chew, burn out spectacularly, and spend the next month feeling guilty every time i look at the pile of expensive, unused materials that i sat down one day and never picked back up.
Theres a toll that years of it takes on your self-trust, it compromises your ability to make decisions without second guessing the most basic things. “What will I want?” and “what will I like?” aren’t any less opaque at six months from now than six years. I can’t count on what I want. In a way, I can’t count on myself and there’s a grief that comes along with that.
i see so much about dealing with adhd shame, but i dont think i’ve heard more than one person express the grief that comes with losing something you really love, not because it leaves you, but because your body simply decides without your permission to stop loving it.
