#god dont tempt me
Exorcist AU where the only Catholic powerful enough to cast out the demon that integrated with Bennett is the actual, literal Pope, and Season Three is a ten-episode-long heist movie / buddy cop road trip in which Marcus, Tomas, and Mouse have to steal the Pope from the Vatican, and it’s literally just the plot of National Treasure (given that Marcus and Tomas are somehow both canonical Nicholas Cage fans) except with the added danger of the fact that apparently the entire Catholic Church except for the Pope is demons. Also the treasure at the end is the friends they made along the way.
The final scene is Bennett slowly blinking awake after his ordeal to find himself strapped to the bed of Marcus’ truck, and standing over him are Marcus, Tomas, Mouse, and tHE FUCKING POPE.
(p.s. he says “Bless you, my child,” and Bennett definitely cries.)
Bennett, his head in his hands: “This is not what I thought my life in the Church would be”
Tomas who just helped the pope spiritually fistfight several demons and maybe the devil: “this is exactly what I thought it would be but I decided to become a priest when I was ten”
marcus, teaching the pope to fistbump: “this is exactly what I deserve to happen to me, I’m very cool”
