#hastur and ligur

melibemusca:

Ligur was lolling on the lovesac in front of the TV when he heard the front door open. He tilted his head back and called, “Game Night?”

“Game Night,” agreed Hastur’s voice from the kitchen, followed by the thunk of a sixpack being set on the counter.

When Ligur had been living with Michael, Game Night had been every Tuesday. Now it was any night that Hastur decided to come over.

Ligur leaned forward to grab the consoles without letting his butt leave the lovesac. The giant beanbag had been on sale when he’d been looking to furnish his new apartment, because nobody wanted swamp green. But Ligur loved swamp green; it went great with his only other piece of furniture, Demon’s terrarium.

Ligur mashed his body to one side of the lovesac and booted up the game, listening to Hastur pop the caps off two bottles. “Hullo, Demon,” muttered Hastur as he walked past the terrarium, sounding as fond as he ever did. Which wasn’t very, but was still more affectionate than Michael had ever been when speaking to Ligur’s pet chameleon. Come to think of it, she never did talk to Demon, she only talked about him, as if he couldn’t hear her.

Hurt both Demon’s and Ligur’s feelings, that did.

The lovesac sank as Hastur dropped onto it. “You need a couch,” he grunted, an important Game Night ritual. They’d agreed during the first Game Night in Ligur’s new apartment that it was pretty weird for two dudes to share the same beanbag, but they could manage as long as it was temporary. Thus the need to regularly reaffirm the imminent acquisition of a couch.

“Yeah,” agreed Ligur, taking the beer that Hastur offered and properly looking at his friend for the first time since he’d walked in the door. Same messy blond hair, hollow eyes, and weird crooked smile. Good. Hastur wasn’t attractive, not that Ligur spend time thinking about what made men attractive, which meant it was even more okay to share the lovesac with him.

“You’re staring,” said Hastur, the side of his mouth pulling up even higher in a grin that other people called creepy.

Ligur liked creepy. He lifted the bottle to his lips and took several long swallows without breaking eye contact. Then he dropped it and wiped his mouth. “Right, let’s play.”

As Ligur took a blade to every body, and Hastur proceeded to rip all riches and life from the land, the space between them shrank. When they were pressed thigh to thigh and shoulder to shoulder, Ligur took his cue for the next part of the ritual. “How’s it going with that Dagon chick?”

Hastur grunted sourly. “Last time she came into the bar, she had some person with her.”

“Guy or girl?”

“Couldn’t tell. Doesn’t matter. Kept a hand on Dagon’s back, ordered for her, made her laugh. Date crap.”

“Maybe–”

“No,” Hastur cut him off.

“Oh.”

Ligur took over capturing and ransoming the young so that Hastur could flay and render flesh, one of his favorite bits. Hastur’s pointy elbow kept jostling Ligur’s side, so he dug his elbow back. After a few rounds of that, Hastur cleared his throat and asked, “How’s Michael?”

That wasn’t in the script. Ligur shrugged. “I think she’s banging Lucifer again.”

Hastur made a face that almost looked like sympathy. It annoyed Ligur. “We broke up,” he reminded his friend.

“Yeah,” said Hastur. “You never told me why.”

“No,” said Ligur shortly. “I didn’t.”

Apparently Hastur was all about the improv tonight. “Always thought it was a bit funny, you dating a girl named Michael.”

“Why?”

“Well. It’s a boy’s name. People ever think you were gay?”

“Sometimes.” Ligur considered that he’d like to be drunk for this conversation, but his beer was empty and he didn’t want to get up for another. Hastur was leaning on him heavily enough that he’d probably fall over. “Why, did you?”

“Did I what?”

“Think I was gay?” There, now they’d both used the word.

“Dunno,” mumbled Hastur. On the screen, they caused the earth’s entrails to exude from its body, and the village paid obeisance in word and tribute.

“We split because of you,” said Ligur.

“Me?”

“Michael said I was more into you than I was into her, and I told her to shut her stupid face, and she kicked me out.”

“Oh,” said Hastur. He dropped his controller and turned to Ligur, and then he was pressing that weird smile right against Ligur’s mouth. So Ligur dropped his controller too, putting his hands in Hastur’s gross hair.

“I have to tell you something,” said Ligur after a bit, sprawled horizontally in the lovesac.

“Yeah?” said Hastur, who was underneath him.

“I’m tired of Animal Crossing. Next Game Night we’re playing Stardew Valley.”

~

Okay so this is what happened. There was a conversation about lovesacs that led to @charlottemadison42 outlining a slobby gamer AU which @moondawntreader proposed applying to maggot husbands and then I said “what game should they be playing” and @goodbyevanny said Animal Planet Crossing and @ack-emma gave me the violent ways to describe real gameplay (and @cassieoh too!) so yeah. Moral of the story, I feel lucky to know such clever people. Also I never tired of getting Ligur and Hastur together in weird ways.