#how you treat others matters
Imagine you’re somewhere in public. School. Work. In a park with your Trojan War re-enactment group. You’re just out there, minding your own business, when you let slip an opinion that some might find controversial.
Out of nowhere, a Karen appears. She asks you if you’re serious about what you just said. When you confirm you are, she comes unglued. Scarcely pausing for breath, she tells you that you’re an awful person, that you’re what’s wrong with this country, that you don’t deserve human dignity for daring to hold such a horrible opinion, and she tells you all of this at the top of her lungs with her spittle flying in your face.
What is your first thought?
- Wow, I thought that opinion was harmless, but it really made her angry. This must mean my opinion isn’t harmless after all. I should check my unconscious biases and do better.
- Holy shit, that woman is an asshole. That woman is the Queen of the Assholes. No fucking way am I changing my mind for a shitcanoe like her.
If you didn’t choose Option 2, then you just lied.
You can tell yourself that your bullying is a service to humanity. You can tell yourself that your victims bring it on themselves through their -isms or -phobias. You can tell yourself that you’re an agent of Karma, bringing the wrath of the Universe down on their deserving heads.
In reality, you’re teaching them. You’re teaching them that people who hold your views are assholes. You’re teaching them that you’ll demand respect without giving it. You’re teaching them that you hate everyone who isn’t like you. You might think you’re pushing them away from views you consider toxic, but all you’re doing is driving them away from the very opinions you want them to adopt.
