Saw that trend that is basically to take a profile pic and to draw a part of it as your style. So here’s mine ? Yes, that’s me baby. Still alive. Somehow.
All evidence to the contrary, I have not fallen off the face of the earth. 2020 has been rather shitty to the DKNC household–a refrain certainly not limited to me and mine, but shared around the world.
My family has had a bit of turmoil, but we seem to be at least starting to come out on the other side. Physically, we are all healthy, and that’s a blessing. Mentally and emotionally, several of us have taken a bit of a beating, but we are very much sticking together and supporting each other (even if the enforced continual closeness during the height of the quarantine sometimes led to a desire for a bit less closeness, LOL!), and that is another blessing.
My children, of course, are no longer children. Their lives are their own and their struggles are adult struggles so I don’t feel comfortable posting their business on a public on-line forum. Suffice it to say that a good amount of my energy this year has been given to attempting to help several young adults (not only my own kids) navigate such things as educational upheavals, career changes, job losses, break-ups, depression, anxiety, and multiple very specific life situations I can’t even find a way to discuss generically. I will specifically and happily announce that this time next year, I will gain my first daughter as Son #1 and his longtime lady love (they are in their mid twenties and have been dating since the summer before junior year in high school minus 2 breakups of 4 and 9 month durations over the years) are officially engaged. They have a beautiful relationship, have grown up both together and individually, and learned a lot about themselves, each other, and life in their journey. Mr. DKNC feel blessed to to have gradually moved to the role of supporting players in their life story as they write their future together. I’ll be getting on my first plane since Covid-19 arrived in America 2 weeks from now to go visit them in the state where they now live for my son’s b-day. Mr. DKNC is going with me, of course, but as he flies planes for a living, this is very much NOT his first flight in the Covid era.
My younger sons are finding their paths. Changing some things, recommitting to others. They are still with us although at least one is chomping at the bit to get out, and I understand entirely. I was the same in my early twenties. Loved my parents dearly, but it was time to enjoy them in somewhat smaller doses. :-)
As I work in the medical field, my job has continued to occupy great amounts of my physical energy and even more of my mental and emotional energy than before as Covid has affected pretty much EVERYTHING I touch professionally in large ways or small.
And like everyone else in this country (the U.S.) I cannot ignore the heinous political climate in our nation, in my state (Kentucky) or even the little town closest to where I live or the nearest city to us. Some things, I cannot in good conscious ignore–and I feel compelled to speak truth. As my little family is definitely a little blue dot in a red place, this has created conflicts with extended family members, neighbors, and friends. These are people I care about. I don’t want to cut them out of my life, and I know they aren’t horrible people but they have fallen in line with what I consider some pretty horrible opinions and world views, and it just makes everything harder. I am a “live and let live” girl on most things in life, but there are some lines I cannot cross. So, yeah. This has been another source of exhaustion.
In two weeks when I go see my son, I will take the first full week off work I’ve taken since June of 2019 as all my travel plans in early 2020 were canceled and as long as I was home and things at my medical practice were in a constant state of flux on both the health care and business side, I just worked.
Over the past month, I’ve said no to more things. I’ve tried to say yes to taking better care of myself, and part of that has been opening my fic tabs–first just to look at them, and more recently to write again.
I’ve missed writing. I’ve missed y’all. I don’t know how much time I’ll have to write now, but I intend to take some at least. I don’t know how long I’ll feel inspired to write as all motivation for anything had been just sucked right out of my soul throughout the greater part of this year. But I right now, I really, really wanna write so I’m just gonna jump back on the ride and see how it goes.
