#imagine negan
When I Found You (Pt. 16 of 19)
Pairing:Daryl Dixon X Reader | Negan X daughter! Reader
Word count: 2.4 K
Summary:You saw Negan build his empire, saw your father become a monster, a murderer, and never had the courage to stand your ground. So everything you do it help as much people as you can, carrying the guilt of being part of it. But one day, your world is shaken when you find him, the man with blue eyes locked up inside a cage. You decide to help him, to keep his community safe. And for that, you’ll have to pretend you and Daryl are in love… But how long until the lie becomes the truth?
Warnings:Some sensitive topics such as mentions and light descriptions of self-harm. (I kept it light, so don’t worry about graphic descriptions.)
A/N:I wanna thank (and give a lot of credit) to to absolutely awesome friend @multific, who helped me with a lot of ideas, and also with the final editing of the text. Love you, girl!!
×
Another Ray of Sunshine
As if this whole problem with Hilltop wasn’t enough, Daryl can’t ignore how (Y/N) has been feeling unwell. Mostly in the mornings. She says it’s just nervousness, as they try to set a plan. But everything Rick comes up with, she points out the flaws. How Negan could thrive. So after three weeks, we’re still clueless. And she’s been taking it as her personal failure, something Daryl can’t seem to convince her otherwise.
“D?” She calls, soft footsteps on the stairs. “Please, don’t make scrambled eggs.”
Chuckling, he puts the eggs down, and then back in the fridge. “What’s yer the problem with eggs? Ya like eggs.” When he turns around, he finds her sitting on the table, seemingly tired.
“I don’t know. Every time I eat eggs I throw up.” She complains, and when she’s done saying it, (Y/N) clears her throat, shaking her head. “I mean–”
“You’ve been throwin’ up?” Daryl inquires, crossing his arms. That he didn’t know, and he’s quite mad she didn’t tell him. How is he supposed to look after her when she keeps things from him.
“Just once… Twice.” She quickly adds. “Look, I’m probably getting allergic to it.”
“Ya weren’t allergic before. How can ya be allergic now?” Making his way over her, Daryl touches her cheek, caressing her. Her bright eyes look into his, and a smile lights up her features.
“I don’t know.” She says, getting up and hugging his midsection. “I’m just anxious, that’s all. Time is running short and we still have no idea what to do.”
“We’ll figure it out. But ya have ta’ tell me when ya feel sick. So I can take care of ya.”
“D, I’m perfectly fine, I promise. It’s just some headaches and my stomach feels funny whenever I think too much about Hilltop. But I’m fine, I promise.” Batting her eyelashes, (Y/N) kisses him, just the way that makes him forget everything. “I promise I’ll tell you when I feel sick next time, alright?” She mutters when she pulls away.
Nodding, he looks down at there. “Alright.”
“Alright.” She repeats, smiling. “Now sit down and let me make you something for breakfast.” Pecking his lips, (Y/N) moves to the countertop.
There’s something in Daryl’s head, but he doesn’t want to think much about it. It brings up feelings he doesn’t know, way too many, and Daryl can’t understand what they mean. So he doesn’t think about it, and he won’t until he finds out if that possibility can even be considered. But he’ll ask the doctor about it because he needs to be sure.
Aaron’s small talk it’s what distracts you a little. He even gets a few giggles out of you, but you know why he’s doing it. And you’re thankful.
“What about you? What was the stupidest thing you’ve done in school?”
School. You barely think about it now. It feels like a different lifetime. “I had a huge fight with a teacher because she called one of my classmates dumb. He wasn’t dumb, he was just a bit slower than the rest but he was smart.” The memory makes you smile. “I ended up at the principal’s office, of course, and got suspended for three days. Father was quite surprised and laughed it out but mother was angry.”
“You barely speak about your mother.”
“I know. Negan’s heart breaks every time so I learned not to talk about her, only miss her.”
“Well, if you ever need to actually talk about her, I’m all ears.” He touches your arm, with that usual smile on his face. “I like hearing stories as much as I love telling them.”
“(Y/N). Aaron.” Someone calls and you both turn around, finding the doctor by the infirmary’s door. “How are you doing?”
“Great.” Aaron answers and you repeat.
“Good. But can I talk to you for a second, (Y/N)?”
“Sure.” Exchanging a stare with Aaron, you gesture for him to go inside with you. The doctor paces around before closing the door behind you. “Do you need anything? We can look for it or I can ask Negan if it’s urgent.”
“No, no. I just need to ask something.” Doctor Díaz crosses his arms, eyebrows furrowed. “It’s just that Daryl has been coming here. Two-three times a day for two days now. But he never asks anything, he just gets nervous and leaves. Is everything alright with him?”
“Yeah.” Shrugging your shoulders, you try to think about anything unusual about Daryl. If he was sick or wounded to the point of needing a doctor, you’d know. “I have no idea what it could be but–”
“I think he’s coming here again,” Aaron says suddenly, and you follow his gaze, seeing Daryl through the window, walking fast this way.
“Alright.” Grabbing Díaz’s arms, you look at him. “I’ll hide in the back. Try to make him say it, whatever it is.”
“I’ll try.”
“Ok. Come.” Grabbing Aaron’s arm, you pull him with you, hiding behind some shelves near the back door.
It doesn’t take much until you hear the door opening. “Hey, doc,” Daryl says, and Díaz mutters a response. “How’s everythin’?”
“Daryl, you’ve been coming here for two days, making the same question and then leaving. If there’s something wrong with you or (Y/N), just tell me so I can help.” Well, doc can’t be subtle, that’s clear.
“Ain’t nothin’ wrong. We’re fine. We’re both fine.” He says, but you know there’s something else. Something he’s not saying. “Jus’… I jus’ need ta’ know what are the… The symptoms of early pregnancy.”
There’s a buzz in your ears, as you look at the white wall across from you.
“The first thing women usually notice is the missed period. Then nausea, mostly in the morning, with or without vomiting.” You feel Aaron’s eyes on you, but you ignore it, crossing your arms. “Tender breasts. Some women start complaining about how their bra is compressing them. Fatigue, aversion to the food she once liked… The list goes on but those are the most common.”
“What if someone is feeling all those things?” Daryl asks, his voice filled with… Worry? Surprise? Fear? You can’t quite place.
“Well, there will be a new baby running around Alexandria in about nine months. Maybe even less.”
“Alright… Jus’ needed ta’ know.” You listen as he walks, heavy footsteps on the floor. “Don’t tell anyone anythin’.”
“I won’t, Daryl.” He assures, and when the door closes, you release a breath you didn’t even know you were holding.
“Whoa.”
“Shut up.” You burst out at Aaron, moving out of your hiding spot. “It could be anyone. Michonne, Carol, Rosita. Anyone.”
“I doubt he’d know about Michonne’s late period or Carol’s morning sickness or Rosita’s tender breasts.” The doc says, and when you turn to look at him, he’s handing you a pregnancy test. “I know it may be scary, but ignoring it won’t help.”
“I’m not pregnant, ok?”
“Then do it. Won’t do any harm.” Díaz says and takes the box from his hands, shoving it in your pocket and rushing out through the back door, taking a different path from Daryl.
“Wait up!” Aaron calls, but you don’t listen, keeping the fast pace.
“I’m not pregnant!” You repeat, running a hand through your hair. “It’s just not possible.”
“Are you two being careful?” He asks, making you blush. “There are ways you know? And we even have some con–”
“No, we weren’t being careful because…” Stopping, you look at Aaron, trying to control the tears that want to roll down. “When I was a kid, I had an accident on the playground. This metal thing impaled me, right above my womb and the doctor said it would be difficult for me to have kids. Not impossible, not risky, just very difficult.”
“Difficult is completely different from impossible.” Crossing his arms, he jerks his head left. “Why don’t you come to my place? Make the test and then you can work with what you get.”
After a while of silence, you nod, leading the way yourself.
•••
You never had trouble peeing. But peeing on that stick was a challenge. But once it was done, you stood before the mirror, waiting for the results. And now, looking at a plus sign, the tears come out, almost involuntary.
The next thing you do is throw the test out, leave the bathroom, and slam the door close.
“I don’t think I need to ask,” Aaron says, and before you can say anything, he embraces you. “Congratulations, (Y/N).”
You don’t even know what to say. There are questions in your head, thoughts rushing through it. You never considered this. You never thought this would happen.
And you don’t even know how Daryl will feel about it.
“This can’t be happening.” Pushing him away, you pace around. “This morning I wasn’t pregnant and now I am?”
“…That’s not how it works…”
“I know how it works, I just…” Taking a deep breath, you sit down on the edge of his bed. “How am I going to do this? We still need to find a way to keep Negan from taking more than Hilltop can give. We still have to find a way to stop him. And that means… That probably means killing him and… How am I going to raise a child in this world? I don’t even know if Daryl wants a baby. And the man already knows!” Lying back down, you cover your eyes with both hands. “Why does he has to be so attentive?”
“Let’s take it piece by piece.” Aaron lies down next to you, and you both start staring at the ceiling. “I think Rick is making this way harder than it has to be, that’s one thing. And you’re not going to raise the kid alone. You’ll have Daryl, who loves you. And haven’t you seen how he takes care of Judith? Don’t you think he might want a Little Ass Kicker of himself?”
“I don’t know…” Running a hand through your hair, you sigh. “What am I supposed to say to him? We weren’t trying. And he knows about the accident, so I’m sure he wasn’t expecting that.”
“(Y/N), you go home to your husband and tell him you’re carrying the very image of your love.”
Furrowing your eyebrows, you look at Aaron. “Damn it, that was poetic.”
He giggles, playfully punching your arm. “It’s true though.”
“Yeah…” Sitting up, you kick his leg. “Thanks, A. For everything. You’ve been an amazing friend.”
“I hope that grants me the title of Uncle.”
Rolling your eyes, you giggle. “Of course, A. I’ll go face my archer now.”
“Great.” Standing up from the bed, Aaron walks you to the door.
As you walk home, a lot of things go through your head. A lot of ways to say this. But nothing is good enough, and when you walk inside, you have no idea what to say.
When you hear a noise coming from your bedroom, you make your way upstairs. Daryl is seated on the bed when you get there, back resting against the headboard. Taking a deep breath, you lean against the door frame, and it takes no time until those blue eyes find you.
“Ya have headaches.” He starts, and you know exactly where he’s going. “Mornin’ sickness, yer period is very late and yer been complainin’ about–”
“About how my breasts are tender.” You finish off for him, looking down. “I was in the infirmary, Daryl. Hiding behind the shelves with Aaron and I heard everything. Doc gave me a test and I ran to Aaron’s place to do it before coming to speak with you.”
“…And?” He asks, hair hiding one of his eyes. It reminds you of the day you met him, naked and imprisoned. You never thought you’d fall in love with him, even though something lit up inside you at the sight of those eyes.
And you certainly never thought you’d carry his baby. “It’s positive.” You whisper, clearing your throat before repeating it louder. “It’s positive.”
Then, silence. Dead, cold silence until Daryl moves. Fast and abruptly, coming to the door. Your heartbreaks, but you find it in your to just move out of the way. But when you do, he changes direction too, and instead of leaving, as you were expecting, he embraces you tightly against his chest. You finally breathe, allowing the tears to roll down.
“I’m sorry. I never thought–”
“I promised I’d take care of ya. And I will.” Daryl says, pulling away just enough to look down at you. “And I’ll extend that promise to… Our baby.” His voice breaks a little, and you caress his cheek.
You know what he’s thinking. “Wanna know why I’m sure you’re not going to be like your asshole father?”
“Why?”
“Because you’re nothing like your asshole father, Daryl Dixon.” Smiling, you push his hair away, just to have a better look at his eyes. “I know it’ll be hard. It’s new for both of us but I’m one hundred per cent sure you’ll be an amazing dad. Because you’re an amazing man and an awesome husband.” Taking his hand, you place it on your stomach. “This baby is the very image of our love. A piece of both of us. It’ll be a crazy child, we gotta be ready for it.” Giggling, you sigh. “But it’ll be strong like you. And caring, and loyal, and–”
“And gentle, like you. Fierce and brave. Another ray of sunshine.” He bends over, placing a soft kiss on your lips. “We’ll make it work. You and I.”
“You and I.” You repeat, smiling. “…And all the uncles and aunts this kid will have.”
×
@riverscyberwife@spenciepoo338@beatitlikeabongodrum@amberritonicole@totheonethatloveshernext@the-artistic-animal@shatteredlovesick@cole22ann@thecraziestcrayon@cloud-laufeyson@arthurdeservedbetterrip@greeneyedladysthings@ruinedbythehobbit@large-juice
When I Found You (Pt. 11 of 19)
Pairing:Daryl Dixon X Reader | Negan X daughter! Reader
Word count: 2.7 K
Summary: You saw Negan build his empire, saw your father become a monster, a murderer, and never had the courage to stand your ground. So everything you do it help as much people as you can, carrying the guilt of being part of it. But one day, your world is shaken when you find him, the man with blue eyes locked up inside a cage. You decide to help him, to keep his community safe. And for that, you’ll have to pretend you and Daryl are in love… But how long until the lie becomes the truth?
Warnings:Some sensitive topics such as mentions and light descriptions of self-harm. (I kept it light, so don’t worry about graphic descriptions.)
A/N:I wanna thank (and give a lot of credit) to to absolutely awesome friend @multific, who helped me with a lot of ideas, and also with the final editing of the text. Love you, girl!!
×
The Mess We Made
You can’t help but feel lonely. Back at the Sanctuary, even though you despised some people, you knew some of them were just bound to the circumstances. So you used to hang around with them. And if everything was bad, you always had Jim. But now, even him is gone. You’ve been talking to him every day because the updates he gives are more serious than Negan’s. But it’s completely different than having him here. And Daryl has spent the last three days, ever since you got here, talking to the group, telling them the details, and trying to set their mind at ease.
So that’s why you decided to finally go out. You did take some walks around the place, but never alone. But since you’re bored, you think you can take some angry stares and gossip.
The sky is clear, but the wind is a bit cold. You’re impressed to see kids running around, playing and yelling. They don’t need to be quiet here, and that’s a good thing. This place is the absolute opposite of the Sanctuary. It’s open and cozy, and if you stop for a moment, you can pretend you’re back in the world before the dead came back to life.
You’re walking through a square when you notice the building next to you seems familiar. Moving to the front, you see it’s a church. Alexandria even has a church. This place barely seems real.
Slowly, you peek inside, just to make sure it’s empty. You wouldn’t want to disturb anyone with your monstrous presence. But when you don’t find anyone, you walk inside, going to the front and looking at the pulpit. It does feel like the world is completely normal on the outside, almost as if you crossed some kind of portal, to where everything is back the way it was before.
“A true miracle.” You mumble, sitting on the first pew.
“A miracle indeed.” Someone says, and, startled, you look at your left. A black, bald man comes walking your way. By his clothes, you know he’s the priest.
“I can go if you like.” You’re quick to say, standing up to your feet.
“No, please.” Raising a hand at you, he smiles. “This place is for all. No need to go.”
“…Okay.” Sitting back down, you run a hand through your hair.
“Were you religious before?” He asks, folding his hands together.
“No, not before, but…” Chuckling, you wonder if you should ever say it. People in the Sanctuary would laugh, but you guess that him, being a priest, wouldn’t. “But after, I… I started seeing God on things, you know?”
“That’s intriguing.” Moving slowly, as if not to scare you away, he sits next to you, three feet away. “I’ve seen people abandoning God after the world fell.”
“Guess it was the opposite to me then.” Again, you chuckle out of nervousness.
“What do you think about this… Apocalypse? Where do you think God is in all this?”
He’s lecturing you. Advising you. But you don’t mind. You could use some therapy or something like that. And you could certainly use the friendly conversation. Plus, you never had anyone to talk to about this. “I don’t think God did this. I mean… Not as a punishment, you know. I think it just happened. Like the bubonic plague or Spanish flu. It came, it killed, and one day it’ll be gone.”
He squints his eyes, smiling a little. “That’s an unusual thought these days.”
“I know.”
“So you do believe in God. And you do believe he hears and answers us.“
“I believe he still helps good people. And delivers judgment to the evil…” Looking down at your hands, you shrug your shoulders. “Like Negan.”
“Your father can still find redemption. As long as we’re alive, there’s hope for changing.”
Shaking your head, you stare at the priest. “I don’t think Negan can change. What he… What he does… He likes it. I… I love him. He’s my father, the only family I have left but sometimes I can’t find good in him. I feel like the father, the man I once knew is completely gone and it breaks my heart.” The words come out fast and low, and you never thought you’d admit it. That this hidden feeling would come out. “I remember when I was little that he used to pick me up from school. Mother took me, and he picked me up. And there was this ice cream parlor on the way home, and on this day I got an F because I studied for the wrong subject.” The memory is blurry but still vivid, and tears start pooling in your eyes. “I didn’t want to say anything because I thought he’d be mad but when I finally said it, he smiled. He said that one day I’d see that life is more than just a test I failed. He stopped by the parlor and got me chocolate ice cream.” Giggling, you wipe off the single tear that rolled down. “That man is gone.”
“Of one thing I’m sure.” He says, friendly touching your shoulder. “Your father loves you. And that didn’t change.”
“I know. I just–” He suddenly looks at something behind you, and you jump up, turning around to find Daryl. “Hey.”
“Hey.” He mutters, nodding at the priest. “Been lookin’ for ya. Got us somethin’ for lunch.”
“Alright.” Looking at the priest, you wave. “Thanks for everything, priest. It was good talking to you.”
“The name’s Gabriel. And you’re welcome whenever you need to talk.” The man says with a smile.
“Thanks.” You mutter again, already following Daryl.
“I heard what ya said. About Negan.” He speaks up when you’re outside. “And Gabriel is right. He loves ya. That’s why he agreed on leaving us alone as long as yer here.”
“I don’t doubt his love, I just…” Sighing, you put a strand of hair behind your ear, glancing at Daryl. “Miss who he was. It’s complicated, I guess.”
“Hey.” A sudden call makes you look forward, and you see a man coming your way with a smile. “Hello, (Y/N). I’m Aaron.” To your surprise, he not only introduces himself but reaches out his hand, which you shake.
“Hi.”
“Daryl told me you’d like to help on the runs, so I could show you what we have here, what we need, our priorities…”
Nodding, you look at Daryl. “I’ll go see it. Can you wait a bit for lunch?”
“Sure, go.”
“Alright.” Smiling again, you tiptoe and place a soft kiss on his lips. It’s only when you step back that you notice what you did. “Mmm… Okay, let’s go.” Stuttering, you turn around, starting to follow Aaron. There’s no reason to kiss him now since everyone here knows you and him are just a lie.
“So…” Aaron mumbles after a while of silence. “You and Daryl, huh?”
“Well, we… We’re good friends. W-we became good friends.”
“Friends, who kiss each other?”
Nervously giggling, you blush, crossing your arms. “That was an accident. I mean, we had to kiss at the Sanctuary to make things believable, so I guess I just got used to it.”
“Is Daryl a good kisser?”
“What?” A laugh escapes your mouth, and you’re sure you look like a tomato now. “H-he– Mmm… We…”
“I’ll take your stuttering as a yes.” Aaron smiles. “This is our storage, come.” He guides you to an open garage, which is wide and has two doors on the back. “We converted this whole house in your storage.”
“No wonder why Negan hates you so much. Looks at all this stuff.” Walking around, you give everything a quick look. “You have chocolate!”
Aaron giggles, coming to stand next to you. “We do. It’s quite rational but guess you can just take it if you want.”
“No, absolutely not. I’ll play by the rules.”
“Alright, but–”
“Aaron?” Someone calls and you both turn around, finding a chubby, dark-haired woman coming from inside the house. “What is she doing here?” Her voice breaks a little, and you can see the fear in her eyes.
“(Y/N), this is Olivia, she takes care of our storage. Olivia, this is (Y/N). But you probably know that already.”
As soon as he’s done speaking, you reach out your hand. “Nice to meet you, Olivia.”
She exchanges a glance with Aaron, who nods, and only then she shakes your hand. “Hello.” She stutters. “If you want the chocolate, you can have it.”
“No, no. Actually, I intend to go on runs too so if you have any kind of list of things I must keep an eye for…” Again, another look at Aaron.
“I-I actually have one.” Olivia walks away, to a square table on the corner. “Our stock of aspirin is low so there’s that. Rita asked if we can find something for her to give her son on his birthday. He’s one year old so anything colorful would do.”
“I got it covered.”
“Well, thank you.” She gives you a half-smile, crossing something in the open notebook.
“I think I should probably go now…” You mutter, already moving. “Thanks for everything and let me know when the next run will be.”
“I must go too.” Aaron touches Olivia’s shoulder. “See you around, Olivia. Don’t forget my share of that spaghetti, alright?”
They mutter something else, but you can’t hear it anymore, already making your way back home.
“Wait!” Aaron shouts, and you turn around to find him jogging until he reaches you. Furrowing your eyebrows, you start walking again. “I’m going that way too.”
“Why are you talking to me?” You suddenly ask, running a hand through your hair. “Correction. Why are you being friendly with me?”
“Because you’re not Negan.” He simply says, smiling when you give him a look. “Daryl has been talking to us about you and so far, I believe you.”
“You do?”
“Yes.” Aaron touches your shoulder, and you stop, turning your body towards him. “Look, I know this is complicated. People here, mostly from Rick’s group, have been through hell out there, so, naturally, they suspect of you. But from what I’ve seen, what you have done to come here and make sure this place is safe is wonderful. And, on behalf of all the people of Alexandria, I thank you, (Y/N).”
You don’t know what to say. You weren’t expecting anyone to thank you for this. “There’s no need. I just couldn’t let my father ruin anyone else’s life. And couldn’t let him ruin this.” Gesturing at everything around you, you sigh. “This is a sanctuary. Safe, and with enough strong and smart people to prosper. And I’ll make sure it will.”
“(Y/N)!” Daryl’s voice reaches your ears, and you turn around spotting him some meters away. “C'mon, let’s eat. I’m starvin’.”
“Coming!” You yell back, turning at Aaron again. “I gotta go. Thanks for everything.”
“I hope we can become friends, (Y/N). And about that spaghetti, I’ll make it tomorrow night. You and Daryl are invited.”
“We’ll be there.” Smiling, you wave, turning on your heels and walking fast back home.
The lunch is a lasagna Carol made, and as you eat, you can’t help but wonder if she’d like you eating something she made for Daryl. You even considered it being poisoned, but since Daryl is eating without any problems, you decided to chill. These people are not like the Saviors, they won’t play that dirty. If they want to kill you, they’ll do it in your face.
“(Y/N).” Daryl gets your attention as you get up, taking yours and his empty plates to the sink. “Tomorrow ya will speak to the group. Rick decided that if yer supposed to stay, ya have ta’ go through the same process as all the strangers.”
Freezing for a moment, you take a deep breath and sit back down, looking at Daryl sitting across from you. “Daryl, I don’t want to do that. They hate me and they know they can’t just kick me out.” Running a hand through your hair, you get up, pacing around. “I’m stuck here in a way. I’m not trying to be ungrateful because Alexandria is amazing, but… The people here look at me like I’m a monster because well… I am.”
“Hey.” You hear as he gets up as well, walking fast towards you and then a strong hand on your shoulder, making you turn around to look at him. “Gabriel didn’t seem like he hates ya. And Aaron? Yer like best friends now or somethin’.” His voice gets funny in the end, making you chuckle. “And me.”
“…You what?”
Daryl doesn’t say anything, those blue eyes looking down at you. It feels like he’s battling himself, wondering, thinking… Furrowing your eyebrows, you start wondering yourself. Maybe you shouldn’t have said anything, just suck it up and do whatever they want you to. Say whatever they want to know.
“You don’t have to say anything, Daryl. You brought me here, believed me so that’s a lot more than I deserve. I–”
“Shut up for a bit.” Daryl bursts out, pinching his eyebrows together.
“Hey!” Punching his shoulder, you fake an angry face.
“Sorry, I jus’…” His voice fades, and slowly, very slowly, you feel Daryl’s hands on your arms, caressing your skin.
Then it happens, suddenly. Daryl’s lips connect to yours, and despite being taken aback by the action, you’re quick to kiss him back, parting your lips to let him deepen the kiss. Countless questions run through your head, but it doesn’t take much until everything fades away. Kissing Daryl is always amazing, breathtaking, indescribable. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you move even closer to him when you feel his arms around your waist, holding your body close to his.
After a while, the heated kiss takes the best of your lungs, and you’re forced to break apart to breathe. But you hold him, both hands grabbing the collar of his vest.
“Daryl…” You breathe out, whispering, your foreheads touching. “Why? There isn’t anyone looking.”
“Does it always have ta’ be an audience?” He asks in a low, husky voice.
“No, but… The lines are blurring Daryl…” Taking a deep breath, you peck his lips a couple of times. “I know this is just an act but I want to kiss you… Even when we don’t have to prove anything to anyone.”
“I know.” He nods, and you feel his hot breath on your face.
It’s clear to you that there’s something he’s not telling you. Daryl isn’t good with words, and you don’t want to force him into anything. “If you want to kiss me, you can because… I want to kiss you. Like… All the damn time and… And even when nobody is around.” Nervously, you chuckle, biting your lip before speaking again. “I think we might have made a mess here, Daryl Dixon.”
“A hell of a mess indeed.” And he kisses you again, warm hands around your waist pressing you against his body.
In your mind, all the rest fades away. There’s nothing but you and Daryl, his lips, his hands, his taste.
And for the first time, this feels real. This kiss is real.
×
@riverscyberwife@spenciepoo338@beatitlikeabongodrum@amberritonicole@totheonethatloveshernext@the-artistic-animal@shatteredlovesick@cole22ann@thecraziestcrayon@cloud-laufeyson@arthurdeservedbetterrip@greeneyedladysthings@ruinedbythehobbit
When I Found You (Pt. 10 of 19)
Pairing:Daryl Dixon X Reader | Negan X daughter! Reader
Word count: 2.2 K
Summary:You saw Negan build his empire, saw your father become a monster, a murderer, and never had the courage to stand your ground. So everything you do it help as much people as you can, carrying the guilt of being part of it. But one day, your world is shaken when you find him, the man with blue eyes locked up inside a cage. You decide to help him, to keep his community safe. And for that, you’ll have to pretend you and Daryl are in love… But how long until the lie becomes the truth?
Warnings:Some sensitive topics such as mentions and light descriptions of self-harm. (I kept it light, so don’t worry about graphic descriptions.)
A/N:I wanna thank (and give a lot of credit) to to absolutely awesome friend @multific, who helped me with a lot of ideas, and also with the final editing of the text. Love you, girl!!
×
Home
From what you got, this was Deanna’s house, the woman who used to rule Alexandria. Daryl told you about her. Well, he told you a lot about Alexandria.
But standing here now is completely different. Daryl united his group so you can make things clear. You can’t wait to break off with the truth, but under their stares, you feel… Small. Well, smaller than you already are. But you also feel hated, and despite knowing they have all the reasons to, it still makes you feel bad.
“What the hell is this about?” A woman with dreads asks, in a rapid tone.
“We have ta’–”
“Wait.” Cutting Daryl off, you gesture at Jim. “Keep an eye on the front of the house. And I’ll need three more people for the left, right and back. If any of the Saviors come, whistle.”
Nobody moves, and you cross your arms, getting a worried glance from Jim. Tilting your head, you sigh when he moves.
“What the hell…”
“Trust her, Rick,” Daryl says, nodding to the man.
“Alright.” He eyes three people, and they immediately move.
You wait, just enough for them to get settled. If any news of this gets out it’s over. That reminds you of the radio you’re carrying to get in touch with Negan. Taking it off your belt, you open it and take the batteries off, laying them on a near wooden table. Better safe than sorry.
“Well? Can someone explain why Negan’s daughter just took over our home?” The woman speaks again, you take a deep breath.
There was a speech in your head, but it vanished. Looking these people in the eye hurts. Hurts because you know what they lost. Who they lost. Because of your father, your people. There’s pressure in your chest, and you cross your arms to prevent yourself from grabbing your thighs. “I can imagine how you feel. But I promise you, you’re safe now. Alexandria is safe now.”
“Do you really expect us to believe that? Coming from Negan’s daughter?” A woman in the back asks, rudely gesturing at you.
“Daryl, explain it to us,” Rick says, furrowing his eyebrows. “What is she doing here? And what does it all mean?”
Daryl sighs, looking at you. “You should be the one ta’ speak.”
“No.” Shaking your head, you step back, gesturing at him. “You tell them. They won’t believe me.” Whispering to him, you give a small quick smile when he nods.
“I was in a cell for three days, naked and in complete darkness when she found me.” He starts, looking down before raising his eyes to the group again. “It was confusing at first and when she left I thought that was it but some minutes later some men came. Threw me some clothes and took me to an apartment. I thought it was some kind of plan but on the next day, it wasn’t Negan who came. It was her.” He points out at you, blue eyes meeting yours. Some butterflies start flying around in your stomach for some reason, and you wonder if you’re blushing. “She had a plan of hers. A crazy-ass plan that I was certain it was some kind of trap.”
“You’re still not making any sense.” The woman standing next to Rick says. You notice a sword on her back.
“(Y/N) said that she had an idea to keep my group safe. Ta’ keep Negan off our asses.” Daryl gestures at everyone, and you watch as they exchange glances with each other. “So I said yes, of course. I was still doubting it, but with time she proved to me I was wrong about her. That she isn’t anythin’ like her father.”
“So are we supposed to just believe that we’re all safe now? That Negan won’t burst through our gates, take what we have, and kill those we love.”
“I know how it sounds, Michonne, but trust me. I didn’t believe it either, but it’s true.” He answers, looking at you again and reaching out his hand. You furrow your eyebrows, wondering what this is about. But since you don’t move, Daryl does it, taking your hand. “Talk to them. It’ll be alright.”
Nodding to him, you take a deep breath, raising your eyes at Rick, their leader. “What I said out there was a facade. I don’t agree with my father’s methods, I never have and when I saw Daryl, I just… I just knew I had to help him. And then I found that he was from Alexandria and I was sure about it.” Involuntary, you squeeze Daryl’s hand. Their stare is hard, and you feel like Negan is right here with you. “My father hates you. All of you. Because you know you can, and will prosper. He knows you have the courage and the strength to rebuild society, something he wants to do himself, in his own cruel ways. So I knew I had to do this. So now I tell you, you’re safe. What Daryl and I have guarantees that Negan won’t bother you again. My nomination as head of Alexandria means nobody gets to mess with this place. I promise you that… You won’t lose anyone else.”
“What is it you have?” A woman with grey hair asks. “What could assure us that Negan wouldn’t take our stuff?”
“Mmm, I…” You whisper, glancing at Daryl. He nods, clearing his throat. “We faked a relationship.”
“You what?” A boy asks, eyebrows raised.
“A fake relationship is the only thing keeping Negan away from us?” Rick inquires, hands on his hips.
“Trust me, we fake it really well.” You chuckle, biting your lip before continuing. “I told Negan we’re in love. And, since I’m his only family and he does everything I want, he won’t hurt the family and the community from which my love is from.” Blushing, you look down, running a hand through your hair. “I know you have no reason to trust me, and all the reasons of the world to hate me. My father killed your family. Abraham and Glenn…” At the mention of the names, you feel like the atmosphere change. The anger and hate are tangible. “But I’m not like that.” When an idea pops up, you let go of Daryl’s hand and pick up the radio before turning it on. “I can prove.”
“Gonna call him?”
“Yeah.” Adjusting the frequency, you look at the group. “Don’t say anything. Just listen.” A little bit of static comes through and you take a deep breath for the hundredth time today. “Dad? Do you copy?”
After some seconds of silence and more static, a voice comes through. “Hello, there, little lady. Are you all settled up on your new homie?” Negan sings songs, obviously not happy with your decision of moving.
“Yup. Just got here, had a little chat with their leader and all is well. Alexandria is mine and they’re updated on the change of command.” Holding the radio near your mouth, you keep your eyes on the floor.
“I will never forgive you for taking Rick and his dumbass group off my hands.”
“We can’t choose who we love.”
“Yeah, but did you have to choose Daryl? From Rick’s circus?” He sighs, and you can imagine the eye roll. “Well, doesn’t really matter now, does it? Alexandria and its army of assholes are yours now. And it’s my job as a father to make sure you’re well attended so I guess I won’t raid this town.”
“Oh, you won’t. Actually, I might need you to get me some stuff.”
“Holy hell, (Y/N). What is it that your papa can get you?”
Giggling, you shake your head. “I’ll check and give you the list. I gotta go now. The Saviors are going back first thing tomorrow.”
“Alright, bun. Have fun, but not too much. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t.”
“Thank you for the advice. Over and out.” Turning off the radio, you raise your eyes at the group. They seem… Perplexed. Shocked. But not Rick. Rick seems sceptical.
“It could be a trap.” Gesturing at Daryl, he moves forward. “Negan and her could be fooling us. They could be fooling you too, don’t you see that?”
“Ya jus’ have to–” A whistle cuts him off, and you immediately turn to the front door.
“Jim.” You recognize by the familiar tune. Moving to the front door, you find Jim climbing the steps to the porch, gesturing with his thumb at the two guys coming to the house.
“The box with the green circle is here.” He says.
“General supplies. Good.” Raising your voice, you move aside, allowing the men to get inside and lay the huge square box on the floor. “You may go back to your posts now.”
“This shit is heavy. What do you have in it?” Giovan asks, and you give him a hard look.
“If you were supposed to know, I’d tell you. Now, back to your post.”
“Sorry, princess.” He mutters, raising both his hands. Once they’re both gone, you sign to Jim to resume his patrolling as you close the front door behind your back. “I brought this for you.” Taking your necklace off, you reveal the key to open the box, giving it to Rick. But the man doesn’t even move, eyes locked on you. “Fine.” Sighing, you get on one knee, easily opening the lock and pushing the top off.
You hear them moving closer to peek inside, and you smile to yourself to see the many guns and ammunition. You got them with Daryl’s help. “All the guns the Saviors took from you are here. And some more as a bonus for the… Trouble.” Getting up to your feet, you walk back to where you were, throwing the key at Rick, who catches it midair.
“I don’t know what to say.” Rick mumbles, eyes on the guns. “This just can’t be real. It’s too good to be real.”
“I felt the same in the beginnin’.” Daryl cuts in, glancing at you. “But she ain’t Negan. Never was, never gonna be.”
You can’t help but smile, heat creeping over your cheeks. “Thanks.” You whisper to his ears only.
“Now come. Lemme show ya our house so those pricks can take yer stuff there.” Walking over to the door, you give the group a shy wave before following Daryl.
You don’t feel welcome here, and you know the feelings these people have towards you are the worst kind. But it makes you happy to see them excited about the guns. Relieved even, to have the firepower to defend themselves again. And as you leave the house, you feel like you did a good thing.
Daryl takes you through the neighborhood, and your eyes wander around. “This place is amazing.”
“It is.” He agrees. “This is it.” Stopping suddenly, he gestures at a small house two streets away from where you were, more to the middle of the city. “Two bedrooms on the second floor and a balcony on the other side. It ain’t big but–”
“Let’s go inside!” You exclaim, rushing through the steps and to the front door, swinging it open.
The house is somewhat on the same side of your apartment, but absolutely adorable. The pale walls make it lighter, and the windows let even more light come inside. You pull Daryl everywhere, until your reach the upstairs balcony. It’s tiny, with enough space for two chairs only, and a small round table. But it’s very pretty.
“This is beautiful.” You say, hands on the wooden railing as you take in the view. The walls at a distance, the people walking around. This feels like home, like a place you’d love to come back to after facing what’s out there.
“I’m glad ya like it,” Daryl answers, and you turn around to look at him. “People here will see who yer really are with time. Ya jus’ need ta’ give them some time.”
“Well, I don’t think I’m going anywhere, so…”
“Yer not. Yer home now.”
“Okay.” Nodding, you can’t fight back the smile that comes to your lips. “I’m home.”
×
@riverscyberwife@spenciepoo338@beatitlikeabongodrum@amberritonicole@totheonethatloveshernext@the-artistic-animal@shatteredlovesick@cole22ann@thecraziestcrayon@cloud-laufeyson@arthurdeservedbetterrip
When I Found You (Pt. 09 of 19)
Pairing:Daryl Dixon X Reader | Negan X daughter! Reader
Word count: 2.3 K
Summary: You saw Negan build his empire, saw your father become a monster, a murderer, and never had the courage to stand your ground. So everything you do it help as much people as you can, carrying the guilt of being part of it. But one day, your world is shaken when you find him, the man with blue eyes locked up inside a cage. You decide to help him, to keep his community safe. And for that, you’ll have to pretend you and Daryl are in love… But how long until the lie becomes the truth?
Warnings:Some sensitive topics such as mentions and light descriptions of self-harm. (I kept it light, so don’t worry about graphic descriptions.)
A/N:I wanna thank (and give a lot of credit) to to absolutely awesome friend @multific, who helped me with a lot of ideas, and also with the final editing of the text. Love you, girl!!
×
Taking Over
Standing outside the meeting room, you pace around. Almost everyone is here, but as usual, Negan will make them wait.
“I’m nervous.” You whisper to Daryl for the tenth time. Today, you’ll ask Negan for Alexandria. You can’t wait anymore, and neither can Daryl. He misses his family, and you want to set him free from the awful place. And you want to make it one hundred percent sure that his people are safe. But the waiting it’s killing you.
“It’ll work,” Daryl assures you, stepping closer. “Ya have ta’ be calm for this.”
“I will be. I will.” The habit makes you touch your thighs as you take a deep breath.
“Hey.” He takes both your hands, pulling them away from your body. “Don’t.”
“Sorry.” As an impulse, you wrap your arms around his neck. “Tomorrow you’ll head back home.” Smiling, you tiptoe, placing a peck on his lips.
“You too.” He mutters, only loud enough for you to hear. You grew used to this, the two of you whispering in the halls, his low, deep voice on your ear. “Both of us.”
“Are you sure about it? We can work on something through distance. Some visits here and there…”
“Yes, I’m sure about it.” He says, caressing your cheek. “We’ll make it work over there.”
“We’ll make it work over there.” You repeat, kissing him again.
“Holy shit!” The dramatic tone and the sing-song words make you roll your eyes, stepping down, and looking at your father. “Can’t you two keep your hands off each other for five minutes?” With a disgusting face, he walks past you two, stopping by the door. “Everyone keeps pissing the hell out of me about how the two little doves are going way too far with the PDA.”
“Don’t you kiss your wives in front of people?”
“Completely different.”
“I disagree.” Shrugging your shoulders, you grab Daryl’s collar and pull him down, kissing him hard and needy, not minding your father’s eyes.
“Get inside right now!” He shouts, and you break the kiss, laughing. “And enough with all this saliva exchanging before I throw up my lunch.”
And so you do.
The council gets tense to see Daryl, but you ignore it. Negan sits on one end of the table and you sit on the other, making Simon move out so Daryl can sit on your right.
“Well, well, well…” Negan starts, sighing. “People say children change your life forever and when Lucille told me she was pregnant I was so down for it.” He holds his bat, looking at it, and for a second, you notice when his stare changes. When he remembers her, your mother. “But I never thought you’d ask me to give up on my worse enemy because of a crush.”
“Daryl is not just a crush anymore. We’re in love.” Trying not to blush, you hate to say that in front of all these murderers. This was supposed to be something that belongs to you alone, but the situation forces your hand. “We’re into a serious relationship, and I won’t have any of these assholes hurting anyone he cares about.” Giving everyone a look, you smile to see them nod.
“I had a perfect plan,” Simon speaks up, chuckling, a hand covering his mouth, glancing at Negan. “It’d take Alexandria and Rick down for good. And we could easily implement it on the other communities as well if necessary.”
“Well…” Mimicking Negan’s tone, you get up, walk around the table, and stop behind Simon. “I could stay here all evening and tell you every single flaw that plan has. Flaws Rick Grimes would find out and take you down.” Touching both his shoulders, you squeeze them. Your father always does that, and you feel when Simon gets tense. He knows you can have him killed if you want. “For good.”
“Did you tell him my plan?” He asks, jerking his head towards Daryl.
“Yup.” Giggling, you walk over Negan, casually resting an arm around his shoulders. “This is only a formality so you’ll know how things will be. Dad and I have been through this already. I met Daryl by accident when he was being kept a prisoner and we got into each other. Now, we’re together and I here announce formally to you I’ll be taking over Alexandria.”
To say people are perplexed is a misunderstanding. They all look at Negan, who sighs and nods. “Yeah.” He bangs Lucille on the table twice, like a judge making a decision. “This is how things will have to be now since my beloved daughter wants to have… That.” He gestures at Daryl, and his tone makes you boil with anger. “But.” He pauses, and you can imagine the smile he has on. “When this whole thing is over we’ll be right back to business.”
“When?” Dwight asks, both his hands folded in front of him. “So we’ll sit here and wait for them to break up?”
“Absolutely, yes!” Negan exclaims, standing up to his feet. You haven’t thought about this. You did promise Daryl nothing would ever happen to his people, and the Saviours are just waiting for their chance.
So this play will have to go on forever.
It seems like Daryl has the same thought because there’s a question in his eyes. Should I prepare myself for an eventual fight?
The answer is no, so you shake your head. You don’t mind keeping this up forever if it means a bunch of good people will be spared. And you know that when you reach Alexandria and the Saviours that will accompany you leave, you won’t have to fake that much…
And that’s something else you haven’t thought about. Daryl won’t have to kiss you anymore.
“So. That’s it. (Y/N) is the head of Alexandrian now so no playing with them anymore or you’ll have to answer to my baby girl and me. ”
At the same time, you walk over to Daryl, biting your lips to hide the smile. “We did it.” You whisper, tiptoeing to kiss him.
“Ya did it.”
“Nope. We did it. You and I.” After another kiss, you follow the people out of the meeting room.
But that’s when the anxiety hits.
You and Daryl spend the rest of the day making the preparations to go to Alexandria. You gave up going half a dozen times, but Daryl keeps assuring you it’ll be alright. Jim and a dozen other Saviours will go with you but leave on the next morning. Then… You’ll be there, far from all those people that make you sick.
But you’ll also be surrounded by people who your father hurt. A hell lot. So it’s a bittersweet sensation.
“Where will I live…? I mean after the Saviours are gone?” You ask as you shyly climb on Daryl’s bed, sitting on your legs.
“Yer making a lot of questions tonight.” He says, reaching out his hand, which you take. “There’s a small house near a square. We could stay there ‘cause-”
“Because you were sharing a house with Carol and oh–She hates me.” Cutting him off, you sigh. “They’ll all hate me. As they should.”
“Yer not Negan,” Daryl states, as he always does. With a small smile on your lips, you move closer to him, lying down with your head on his chest, as usual. “They’ll come around with time. They’ll get ta’ know ya and they’ll see yer nothin’ like these assholes here.”
“I wish I had your hope.”
“Stop thinkin’ about it and get some rest. Long road tomorrow.”
“Are you happy to go home?” Stupid question, of course, he is. “Well, I know you are. I’d be too, obviously.”
“I’m not good at sayin’ stuff but… Thank you.” When you listen to those words, you raise your head, using your elbow to support your weight. “If it wasn’t for you more people could have died.”
Smiling, you lean down to kiss him, softly. “I’m just trying to do what’s right.”
“Yer succeedin’.”
“Daryl, we… What will happen to us? When the Saviors leave?” You ask in a low voice, going back to your previous position on his chest. “This fake thing won’t be necessary once we’re alone there…”
“Do you think I’ll stop takin’ care of ya?” He grunts as if you said something very stupid. “Ya ain’t gettin’ rid of me that easily.”
Giggling, you nod, closing your eyes. “Good night, Daryl.” You whisper, smiling to hear his soft reply.
Daryl was genuinely happy to be home. When he sees Alexandria’s gates, a smile crosses his lips. But he never thought he’d be taking the Saviors with him. At least this means something good. With (Y/N) as the head of Alexandria, his family will be safe. And nobody else will get hurt. Ever again.
He feels when she gets tense on the bike behind him, arms strongly encircling his midsection. Having her cross the gates on his bike will send a good signal to the group. He needs them to see in (Y/N) the same thing he sees.
In the beginning, she was a paradox to him. So beautiful and kind, with a proposition to save his group out of nowhere. For a long time, Daryl thought she was lying, that it was some kind of trap. But it wasn’t. And the angel-like girl, whose eyes caught his attention at the very first sight, stole his heart.
It was a weird sensation for Daryl, to have his heart settled on someone. But this feeling is why he’s bringing her here, for good. Here, she won’t have to hurt herself anymore, because Daryl’s heart breaks every time he thinks about what she used to do. He makes sure she’ll keep her nails short now, just in case. He knows it may come out as too controlling, but he just wants her to be fine. Happy.
Everything is new to Daryl. This is a situation he never thought he’d be into. He not only has strong, confusing feelings towards her, but she seems to feel the same. She never pushed him away, instead, she holds on to him, mostly at night. He never thought a woman like her, young, beautiful, and kind, would ever want to be near him.
But he wants to be near her. So that’s what he’ll do. Daryl decided not to overthink the chaotic feelings trapped inside him, and just do what felt right. And (Y/N) feels right. That’s why she’s here with him, entering her new home. Daryl will make sure he’s fine, healthy, and happy. If it’s up to him, she won’t ever have to see death in its worse form, imposed on good, innocent people.
When the gates open, you can’t help but hold onto Daryl a little bit tighter. But when the bike stops, you jump off, eyes on the group coming your way. There are some people ahead, and others keep a distance. You can’t ignore how amazing the place is. It looks like a town, and if it wasn’t for the circumstances, you could pretend this was the world from before. A normal neighbourhood with children playing around.
But the group ahead of you is fully alert, and those behind you need to be fooled, so they can take the right information to your father back at the Sanctuary. So you take a deep breath, clenching your hands into fists.
But before you can say anything, Daryl walks forward, hugging who could only be Rick, judging by the description Daryl gave you. “Brother.” He mumbles, patting Daryl’s back. And despite the groups’ eyes being on you and the Saviors, everyone greets Daryl, some with teary eyes.
Then, once the greetings are over, all the attention is back on you. And the Saviors.
“As much as I’m happy to see you alive and well, brother, I have to ask…” Rick jerks his chins forward, at you and the heavily armed people you brought to their home. “What’s this about?”
Daryl gives you a look and a nod. So you take a deep breath, preparing yourself for another act.
“People of Alexandria.” You start, raising your voice so everyone can hear it. “You all know this place and your asses belong to my father. But there was a change of protocol.” Shrugging your shoulders, you pace around, glancing at the Saviors. “I am now Head of Alexandria, which means your asses now belong to me, so you’ll do as I say, just like you do as Negan says.” There’s a commotion, but you ignore it, turning to face the Saviors. “And you won’t ever touch anyone from this Community unless I say so. Understood?”
“Yes, princess.” They chant, almost at the same time and you fake a smile before turning around at the group.
“Understood?”
×
@riverscyberwife@spenciepoo338@beatitlikeabongodrum@amberritonicole@totheonethatloveshernext@the-artistic-animal@shatteredlovesick@cole22ann@thecraziestcrayon@cloud-laufeyson@arthurdeservedbetterrip
Part 03 of 03
Pairing:Negan x Reader
Word count: 1.6 K
Summary:You were running from death for too long, and when you stumbled upon a wooden cabin in the woods, you found more than just a safe place to hide.
×
I happened fast. The fights, the yelling, the tears.
Negan left, and you stayed behind, among people you don’t know. Hurt, heartbroken, feeling like a fool.
Carol is the one to take you in. And, despite everything, it doesn’t seem like she’s happy about all this.
You’re half dead yourself, as the day goes by, then another, then one more. Part of you wants to go, back into his arms, so he can keep you warm at night. You even dream of it, of leaving this city and facing the woods, even in the dark, back to the cabin that makes you feel safe.
Back home, with him.
“Are you alright?” Carol asks, and when you raise your eyes at her, you find a mug in her hand, which she passes on to you. “You’ve been outer space again.”
“Just thinking.”
“About Negan?”
“Yes.”
“Do you love him?” The question makes you look at her again, eyes previously on the hot tea. “Do you?”
Biting your lip, you shrug your shoulders. “Maybe.”
“When you have this face on and say it in this tone, maybe means yes.” She sits next to you, sighing. “I need you to know I didn’t tell you those things to keep you away from him. I just needed you to know everything so you can make your choice based on all the facts.”
“It’s just that… Imagining Negan as some tyrant…” Your voice fades, and you take a sip from your tea. “Why didn’t he tell me?”
“I don’t know. In the best scenario, he’s ashamed. Or afraid you’d leave him. Like you did. Negan–” A knock on the door gets her attention. “I’ll be back.”
And she leaves you alone, with your hot mug and confusing thoughts going through your head. You miss him so much, that’s the only thing you can think about. Him.
“…can I speak with her already or are you still playing mom?” A voice reaches you and looking at the corner, you sip your tea and sigh. Seconds after, a woman comes in. She has short, light brown hair and blue eyes. Or green. You can’t tell. “So you’re Negan’s girlfriend.”
No, you’re not. Are you? “I think we broke up.”
“I just want to make sure you know the man you’ve been living with.” She says but doesn’t sound angry. And you were expecting her to be angry. This is Maggie, you can tell by how Carol described her a while ago. The window.
“He killed your husband. Left your child fatherless.” Voice weak, you nod to yourself. “I’m well aware of the man he was.”
“Good. I don’t care about your feelings for him. I don’t care if you forgive him or not, what I do care about is the truth.” Maggie says, walking closer. Carol appears behind her, eyes on you. “I want you to have the whole picture, so you can judge it. Because I believe you’re an intelligent woman who’s able to know the difference between someone who’s lying and someone being honest.”
With your eyes locked on her, you nod. For some reason, there are tears in your eyes. The truth is, whenever you mentioned his past, there was sadness, even desolation on his face. His posture changed, Negan was… In pain. It makes your heart beat faster because you’ve seen it in his eyes. How embarrassed he was, as he remembered the things he did.
Now, your heart craves for him even more. It drums in your ears, and maybe you’re getting crazy, but you swear it’s beating his name.
“Well, can you?” Maggie asks, and you can see her again.
“Yeah.” You mutter, nodding again. “I can.”
“Good.” She mutters, coming over to you, a hand on your shoulder as you look up at her. “I can never forgive Negan. I don’t have it in me, not yet. I’m not my father. But I won’t despise you if you choose to stay with him. I’m a reasonable woman, and you’ll always find a home here, and a place to come if you need help or anything.”
“Thanks.” You whisper, giving her a small smile.
“I shall go now. There’s a lot to do.”
“Can I help?” You suddenly want something to do, both to be useful and to make your blood flow. Maybe it’ll help you think.
•••
It doesn’t help. Not really.
The sun is moving towards the horizon when you’re back at Carol’s place. After showering to wash the dirt and sweat off, you sit on the bed of the guest room.
Brushing your hair, you remember Maggie’s words. And Carol’s words. And Negan’s.
Closing your eyes, a smile comes to your lips at the memory of his kiss. Lying down, you take a deep breath. During your labor, you have played back all the times you asked about his life before the cabin, from the very first time. His expression dropped, he moved, as if shrinking, even tried to move away from you, even is subconsciously. Sometimes, he’d go out, with the excuse of searching for nearby walkers. And once back at the cabin, he acted weird, as if dirty. Guilty. Trying to do stuff for you as a way of apologizing for something he didn’t do. Well, for something he did that you didn’t know.
“What do I do?” You ask yourself, in a low voice, moving to lay on your side. “What do I do?”
Pulling the pillow close, you hug it, burying your face in it. After a while, you’re almost falling asleep despite still being late afternoon. But your nap is interrupted by a weird sound, music, you realize as you sit up. Then, a knock on the door.
“(Y/N),” Carol says, and you rub your eyes.
“Come in.” You tell her. “Who’s partying?”
“Negan.” She says, in an urgent voice. That’s when you recognize ‘Sweet Child o Mine’.
“Holy shit!” And you’re off, rushing to the window and pulling it open.
Negan is on the sidewalk, leaning against his bike with the super old radio you have on the ground, from where the music is coming. A smile creeps over your lips, and it feels like your heart will jump off your chest.
It doesn’t take much until his eyes find yours, and a sad smile lights up his features.
“I think you should go talk to him,” Carol says, raising her voice above the music. And you’re crying, even though you tried hard not to.
“I love him. Who he is now. He… He changed, I know he did.” You tell her, giving him a little, shy wave.
Carol giggles, and when you turn at her, there’s a kind smile on her face. “I know. I got that the first time I saw you. It was in your eyes.”
I’m in a rush of adrenaline, you run to her, throwing your arms around her. “Thank you. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome. Now go! I don’t think he cares much about attracting walkers as long as he can get you back.”
“Oh, I’ll make him turn it off. Sorry.” Placing a kiss on her cheek, you’re off, almost stumbling through the stairs.
When you’re outside, you’re running to him. Right into his arms. But his arms aren’t enough, so you jump on him, legs around his waist. “Holy shit.” He mutters at the sudden move, but there’s a laugh in his voice. Negan is quick to hold you up, embracing you tightly against him. “God, I missed you so much. I’m so sorry, I should have told you everything but I was so scared, (Y/N).”
“Yeah, you were a dick.” You mumble, many tears rolling down. “Are you’re a jerk for not telling me but you’re so damn lucky I love you.”
“Wait… You love me?” He asks, and you pull apart just enough to look into each other’s eyes. It’s funny to see him from this perspective since he’s holding you in a way you’re taller. “Do you really love me? An old man like me?”
“An old man like you.” You say, raising an eyebrow. “Now, please, turn it down before we have to stop the reconciliation to put some walkers down.”
“You’re right.” He makes a show of putting you down, before kicking the radio’s off button. “Now, baby, get your iPod, and let’s go home.”
“Only if you promise never to lie again. Never.”
“Never.” He smiles, that smug smirk you love so much. “As long as I live, I’ll never, ever speak a lie again. Not to you at least.”
“Alright.” Nodding, you give some steps backward before turning around and getting back inside to get the iPod. When you’re back, you hop on the bike behind him. “We can pick the radio next time.” You say, holding tight to him.
“As the lady wants.” He gives you a look before starting the bike and moving forward. “Now that you have forgiven me because I’ll assume you already did… We can start talking about the next steps.”
“Next steps?” Raising your voice so he will hear you, there are a lot of eyes on you. People are surprised, you think, to see you with Negan.
“Yup. Marriage… Maybe a kid?”
“Maybe two?” You say with a giggle, as you cross the gates.
“Two kids it is.”
Pushing yourself up quickly, you place a kiss on his cheek before letting yourself fall back on the seat. “Let’s ride to the sunset then, my love.”
×
Part 02 of 03
Pairing:Negan x Reader
Word count: 1.8 K
Summary: You were running from death for too long, and when you stumbled upon a wooden cabin in the woods, you found more than just a safe place to hide.
×
“She’s got a smile that it seems to me, reminds me of childhood memories. Where everything was as fresh as the bright blue sky.” Both you and Negan sing along to the music, in a tone of voice that will make him check the surrounding areas. But it feels good. And you’re happy you feel safe enough to do this after so long stuck in silence. “Now and then when I see her face, she takes me away to that special place, and if I stare too long, I’d probably break down and cry.” With a bright smile on your face, you brace yourself for the chorus. It’s always powerful, and it brings a nostalgic feeling. From the life before, when you used to dance to this very song in your bedroom.
“Whoa, oh, oh, sweet child o’ mine.” Negan, as usual, sings the first part. You have your legs on his lap, as you both sit on the living room couch, sharing a blanket.
“OH!, oh, oh, oh, sweet love of mine.” You finish up, throwing your head back with a smile.
It took two weeks for you and Negan to break through each other. Seventeen days to be exact. At first, it was weird, mostly at night when you were sharing the bed. But now, it’s actually nice. And fun. You love his sense of humor.
“Good music never gets old.” He comments when the song is over.
“You’re one hundred percent right.” With a giggle, you run a hand through your hair. “It just sucks that you have to go charge it at the community.”
“Yeah, it was pretty hard to explain the first time.”
“Why don’t you live with them? Was it your decision or theirs?”
Negan goes silent for a while, a sigh leaving his lips. “I wasn’t much of a nice guy before. Did some ugly shit, they rather have me away.”
“Well, we all did some ugly shit at some point. I had to kill people and… I’m not proud of it.”
“You? Tiny, little you? I don’t believe it.” Under the blanket, Negan tickles your sides, making you break into laughter, slapping his hands.
“Stop it! Stop it!” You’re still giggling when he does. “Well, I’m not as helpless as I look, Mister. I can defend myself when I need to.”
“Well…, you won’t need to anymore.”
“Oh, yeah? And why’s that?” There’s this unspoken thing between you. It gets clear these times when the conversation goes some unexpected way. It feels like something floating in the air, close enough to grab, but you don’t know why neither of you take it.
“Because from now on you have me.”
“And why the hell do you think my stay is permanent?” Squinting your eyes, you stare at him.
“Because if you go, sweetheart, you won’t be taking my iPod.”
“I can always steal it.”
“You wouldn’t dare.”
“Is that a challenge?”
Negan raises an eyebrow, and when you think he will say something, he suddenly grabs your legs, and pulls, making you slide on the cough, closer to him. “If you’re leaving I have to–” And he’s tickling you again, on the ribs, making you laugh out loud, trying to push him away. “–make sure you don’t forget me, little one.”
“NO!” You scream, trying to get him off you. “I’m not going anywhere! Stop it.”
“Oh, good. Very good.” He raises his voice to make himself heard above your laughs. And when he finally stops, he’s close.
A little too close.
“You really want me to stay?” You ask now that you managed to catch your breath. He nods. “Why? And no funny answer, I really wanna know.”
“It’s just good to have someone who doesn’t hate me.”
“Why would I hate you?” As usual, Negan starts to move away. And not only physically, but also emotionally. It happens every time you get closer to asking about whatever happened before. But this time, you hold him by the collar of his shirt, forcing him into this half lying, half sitting position you got yourselves into. “Negan, please. Whatever you tell me… It’s ok. We all did bad things in the past.”
“That’s it. I did bad things. No need to get into details.”
“Ne–”
You’re suddenly cut off by his lips, crashing on yours. It’s so unexpected that for a moment you’re frozen, unsure why he did that. And your lack of response makes him pull away, an awkward expression on his face. “I screwed up. I thought it would be romantic, you know? But I get it, being kissed by an old man like it must be–”
“Shut up and kiss me again so I can kiss you back, you idiot.”
And so he does. A couple of times, actually.
And then, way too many times, never enough.
Love is different these days. Before, it would take more time. And maybe your world wouldn’t even get in touch with his.
But now, it happens fast. And it doesn’t make it weak. Maybe, it makes it stronger.
You and Negan bounded quickly. And it also escalated quickly. From the first awkwardness of living under the same roof with someone after so long alone, you grew to enjoy his company. To want his company. To love his company.
•••
“It’s so cold today.” You complain, coming from the bathroom and sliding under the blankets, curling up next to him. “Winter will be tough.”
“It will.” He takes you in with open arms, rubbing your back as you put your head on his chest. “I’ll get us more blankets.”
“In Alexandria?”
“Mhmm.”
“Can I come with you?” You ask, lifting your head to look at him. “I’m curious about it.”
“Thought you were suspicious of them.”
“I am.” Raising your head, you look at him with a smile. “So I wanna go to keep you safe.”
“Oh, thank you. I always get so scared out there, I’ll feel so much better with you.”
The sarcastic tone makes you roll your eyes. “Keep talking like that and I’ll bite you.”
“Mmm… I might not complain.”
“Oh, shut up.” Lying on his chest again, you pull the blankets closer. “Also… I wanna go out. I have been inside this cabin since I got here. I’m ready to face the outside world again.”
“I’ll be right there with you.” Listening to this soft, sweet promise, you fall asleep in his arms, warm and comfortable.
•••
The morning comes fast, and it’s around nine when you and Negan leave the cabin. Being outside again feels weird, but good. Now that you don’t need to run for your life, you can see the beauty of it. The trees, tall and strong, the sunlight coming through, painting the atmosphere with a golden shine.
“You’re alright?” He asks after a while, taking your hand in his. “Anxiety kicking in?”
You simply shake your head, giving him a look and a smile. “It’s silent here. I like it.”
“Yeah, it is.”
“Thank you for walking there. I needed to… Face it. The fear of being out here.”
“Not a problem. It’s not a hard walk.” Negan has your hand secure in his, all the way.
The gates of the city come into your sight suddenly. It’s open, with a couple of people by it, working. You feel Negan tensing up, so you caress the back of his hand with your thumb. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” He quickly says.
Furrowing your eyebrows, you look ahead. As you get closer, the staring begins. Nobody stops you, but nobody talks to you either. Not until a woman with white hair comes, with a very weird smile on her lips. “Hello. Do you need anything?”
“Blankets. The nights are getting colder.” Negan says, and the woman looks at you.
“Hi…” You mutter, unsure what to say. “Could I charge my iPod while Negan gets the blankets?” Deciding to ask, you offer the woman a smile.
Which she retributes. “Sure. Come.” The woman tilts her head to the side, and you look at Negan, only following her when he nods.
The woman guides you into a house, showing you a power plug. “You can use this one.”
“Thank you.” You mutter, plugging it and sitting on the armchair next to it.
The woman stays there, and you raise your eyes to look at her. “So it’s true.” She says after a while, curiously. “There is a girl with Negan after all. Unless you’re being forced to be here, putting on an act.”
“An act?” Squinting, you shrug your shoulders. “Why would I do that? Why would Negan force me–”
“Well, in his defense, he was always against any kind of abuse to women. Never allowing his men to force women into any kind of sexual interactions, going as far as killing those who did or tried.”
Her words get to you slowly, as you try to process all this. His men? Was he some kind of leader before? Before, as in before the world broke? No, probably after. Before probably mean before you. “Mmm… I was alone for a long time. I got hurt and stumbled upon the cabin. Didn’t know he was in there. He took me in and we’ve been… Together ever since.”
“Together as in together? Or just together?”
Why does she care? Why is she asking so many questions? “We’re together.” You’re careful not to put any kind of intonation on it. She’s free to understand it however she likes.
“Then he told you who he was. What he did.” She steps closer, a hard expression on her face as she looks down at you. “Why nobody wants him here.”
Standing back up, you face her. Even though she’s taller. “I don’t know what you’re trying to do here. If you’re into Negan or if–”
“Negan had an army.” She cuts you off, raising her voice. It feels like she’s your mother, that warning tone that makes you want to sit down and listen to the lecture with your mouth shut. “He terrorized us, other communities as well. He killed many of our people. He took our things, the things we worked hard to get, just to burn them on the side of the road. He almost made one of ours cut off his own son’s arm.”
“What..?” It comes out a shallow breath, as you step back, falling on the armchair. There are tears in your eyes, and the man you love turns into a monster, made up by this woman’s words. You know he did bad things… but not this. This is too much. “H-he couldn’t.”
“Yeah… Guess he didn’t tell you that part of his story.”
×
Part 01 of 03
Pairing:Negan x Reader
Word count: 2.1 K
Summary:You were running from death for too long, and when you stumbled upon a wooden cabin in the woods, you found more than just a safe place to hide.
×
Let’s Be Alone Together
You were chased by the dead before. By a herd of them. But you were never this scared of only three.
The wound on your right leg makes you terribly slow, basically dragging yourself through the forest, using anything in your path to help you move. But they are close. In fact, they grab your legs every now and then. You want to fight, to kill them all over again, but the weakness of almost a week with nothing to eat has taken your strength away.
You’re lying down, listening to their growling when it comes into your sight. A wooden cabin, as if it took form only now, being born from the forest ground. It’s an amazing view, you think. It’s safety, it’s a chance to live a little longer.
With a last boost of adrenaline, you start half limping, half jumping, the empty bag slapping on your back. But when you finally make all the way to the simple wood door keeping you away from the security of that cabin… It’s blocked.
“Shit.” You mutter, pushing it, trying to pull on the handle. Then, you start punching it, trying to make it move. They’re close now, the dead. You’ll become one of them… After a hell lot of pain.
The thought makes you cry, sob, pushing the door with everything you have left, tasting the salty tears in your mouth.
“Who the hell is–” The voice reaches you suddenly, at the same moment the door is pulled open and you almost fall inside.
It happens too fast for your scared, terrified mind to process. But you’re pulled inside, falling on the floor with a groan as the man steps outside. The noises that follow, or rather saying, the cessation of the insistent snarling, tells you that whoever that was, he put the dead into death again. Permanently.
All those thoughts you’re supposed to have now when meeting another living person, don’t come to you. Lying back, eyes on the wooden ceiling, you just breathe. In and out, the paint on your leg gets worse as your blood gets colder, as the adrenaline leves lower.
“Hey.” The man says, and you close your eyes. Please, God. Let him be a good man. Please, God, let him not be evil. Or crazy. Please, please, please. You chant in your head, praying, hoping. “Are you alright, young lady?”
You chuckle. Young lady? “Yeah. Gonna be.” You burst out. “Gonna be.”
“This on your leg. Were you bit?”
“God, no.” Eyes open again, you turn your head at the source of the voice. The man you find is handsome, with dark hair slid back, a gray beard, and eyes that don’t scare you. The white T-shirt he’s using is stained by blood now. “I had a car. Lost control and it crashed badly.” You touch your forehead, the cut above your eyebrow. “Barely came out alive. Been walking around ever since.”
“Mmm.” He mutters, and vanishes from your side, deeper into the house. You stay there, catching your breath. “Is there anyone looking for you?”
Red flag. “No.” Damn it, you should have lied. “Why?”
“There’s a community not too far away. I’m sure they’d take you in.” He comes back, with a clean T-shirt on, dark blue this time, and sits near your wounded leg. Before you can ask what he’s doing, the man is cutting your jeans to have access to the wound. “It’s safe.”
“If it’s safe, why aren’t you there?”
“I’m better off on my own.” He simply says, and you hiss when he pours something on the wound. “I’m Negan. You?”
“(Y/N). Ouch!”
“It’s bad. The cut got you deep. Sliced your muscle in two.”
“Great.” You mutter, grinding your teeth when he does whatever he’s doing. “Goddamn it.”
“Where are you from?”
“New York.”
“Why did you come here?”
“Had no idea where to go. Damn it!” You yell, sitting back up, looking at him. “What the hell are you doing?”
“Stitching you up. Now lie back down and let me finish.” He says, pushing your shoulder until you’re back against the floor. “Talking helps. Tell me about you.”
“I’m (Y/N)… But you already know that. Currently on the second decade of my life, which wasn’t supposed to be spent fighting for my life.” Another groan and you cover your face with both hands. “I wanted to be a vet. I-I love the color the sky gets just before the sunrise. Has seen it many times ever since the dead came back to life, in endless sleepless nights.” The words keep coming, as you try to focus on anything else than the pain. You’re used to the agony by now, but it doesn’t mean you like it. For a day, a week, or a month, you’d like to live without it.
Without pain, without fear, without loneliness.
And then, you’re crying. From the wound, from the reality of your life now.
“Hey, hey,” Negan says, and you bite back a sob. “Tell me about your favorite song. Favorite song ever.”
He’s trying. He’s… Being nice. And you hope he won’t ask for anything in exchange. “Sweet Child O’ Mine.” You say, taking deep breaths.
“Oh, really?” You nod. “If you hold on, I’ll give you my old iPod. I have this song in it. And plenty of others. Still has some charge left.”
At that, you smile through the tears. “Thank you.” You whisper, even though that’s a sign of vulnerability. But so are the tears. If this man wanted to hurt you, he wouldn’t go through all the trouble of helping you.
He says something, but for some reason, you feel the world around you fade to black.
After a while, maybe a minute, or a couple of hours, you come back into the world of the living. Eyes opening, you’re startled at first - and relieved - not to see the top of the trees. But a ceiling instead. In the next seconds, everything comes back. The man, Negan, the stitches, the door opening to welcome you in.
You have no idea why Negan is the first thing that comes back, instead of the feeling of safety for being away from the dead.
Grunting lowly, you sit up, looking around the simple room. By the looks of it, it’s his room. On the nightstand, you find a sheet of paper with handwritten words on it. It’s been so long since you saw handmade calligraphy that it takes a while for you to understand.
‘Went to get a few supplies. Will be back soon. The shower works, no warm water though.’ It’s everything it says. And screw the cold water, you just need to get the dirt, blood, and sweat off your body.
So into the bathroom you go, a high window letting in some light. On the sink, there’s a pile of clothes, man’s clothes, Negan’s clothes. But given the note he left, you conclude those are for you. Your clothes are ruined and he surely noticed that.
The water makes you shiver, and it’s kinda complicated with the wounded leg, but you’re thankful for it. You close it while you rub soap on your body, all over, until you are covered by a white layer of it. And when you find a shampoo, you can’t help but use it too.
Once you’re done, into the sweatpants you had to fold the bars and the dark blue, tattered hoodie, you walk out, feeling better than you had in a long time. Your skin smells so good, and so does your hair, that you even ignore the pain in your leg. Going back to the bed, you lie down, taking a deep breath.
That’s when the bedroom door opens, and fear creeps over. Your first thought is to run but for some reason, you’re slower. Like under the stupor of having to find a place - even if not your place -, that you’re finally not in imminent danger.
“Whoa, sorry.” He raises a hand, a bag on the other. “Believe it or not I went to get some stuff for you and kinda forgot you were here.”
“Stuff? What kind of stuff? Where?” It comes out too fast, almost all scrambled. “You’re sending me away?”
“First of all, breathe.” He puts the bag down, walking closer to the bed. Out of instinct, you move back, until your back hits the headrest. “Second, I’m not going to hurt you, and third, I’m not sending you away.” Negan puts the bag on the bed, opens it, and pulls some clothes from it. Woman’s clothes. “I have zero girl’s stuff in here, so I went to Alexandria to get you some.”
Slowly, you crawl over the bag, checking what’s inside. “Y-you even got me tampons?” You ask in disbelief.
“Yeah. You girld use it, don’t you?”
“Yeah…” Voice fading, you keep looking. There’s even a half of a body lotion in it. “Thank you. I… I didn’t mean to invade your place. But I saw a cabin and I knew I had to get inside or else I’d die.”
“I know. And a pretty girl like you has more to fear out there than just the walkers.” Negan walks across the room, sitting on the armchair near the window, which is blocked by planks of light-colored wood.
Walkers… Funny way to call it. “Pretty girl?”
“I don’t mean it creepily.” Negan defensively raises his hands again.“You’re a beautiful young woman, it’s hard not to notice that.”
Looking down at your baggy clothes, and minding how tired your face must look, you wonder if he’s joking. “Well, thanks.”
“You’re welcome.”
“Yeah.”
He nods in response, and you stare at each other for a while. Like a minute maybe two. On your part, you think the reason why you can’t take your eyes off him is that you can’t believe he’s real. You’re having a hard time processing you found a small house, to keep the ‘walkers’ away, and a person who is being kind. Kind enough to go who knows where to get you the things you’ll need.
On his part… You have no idea. But the good thing is that you don’t find evil things in his eyes. Not lust, or anger, or far worse things. Negan is just… Gazing. Admiring…? Maybe he also can’t believe it, having found someone else who’s not crazy. But he did say there’s a community somewhere around here.
“So. How long can I stay?” You decide to ask, breaking eye contact to crawl back under the blankets.
Through the corner of your eyes, you see him shrugging his shoulders. “I’m not going anywhere. So you can stay for as long as you want.”
Nodding, you lie on your side, looking at him again. “I’ll stop bothering you as soon as I find a place to go. A direction to keep moving too.”
“Don’t you have a goal? Someone you’re trying to find, someplace you’re trying to get to.”
“There ain’t much left out there…” You mutter, sighing. “And I have no one left so I just keep moving.”
“I don’t have anyone either.” He says, looking down at his hands. “Lost everyone I loved, everything I built. Now it’s just me in here.”
There’s a question, a proposition in the air. But you think he doesn’t want to say it, all the words, and you don’t think you can either. But in your head, it sounds like: If we’re alone, let’s be alone together.
“Do you mind if I nap a little here? Then I can sleep on the couch, the floor, or even on this armchair.”
“Sleep. I’ll check the surroundings.” And he stands up. “And I’m a practical man. It’s a double bed so we could share until I find another bed for you. But you can put some pillows between us.”
You don’t want to sleep on the same bed a man you just met.
But all things considered - the end of the world as you know it, the fact that you’re inside a house after so long, finding a man good enough to care about you -, this isn’t as crazy as it was before. It’s survival. If there’s a bed that fits two and you’re in two, both will take the bed.
“That’s alright by me.”
When I Found You (Pt. 08 of 19)
Pairing: Daryl Dixon X Reader | Negan X daughter! Reader
Word count: 2.5 K
Summary:You saw Negan build his empire, saw your father become a monster, a murderer, and never had the courage to stand your ground. So everything you do it help as much people as you can, carrying the guilt of being part of it. But one day, your world is shaken when you find him, the man with blue eyes locked up inside a cage. You decide to help him, to keep his community safe. And for that, you’ll have to pretend you and Daryl are in love… But how long until the lie becomes the truth?
Warnings:Some sensitive topics such as mentions and light descriptions of self-harm. (I kept it light, so don’t worry about graphic descriptions.)
A/N: I wanna thank (and give a lot of credit) to to absolutely awesome friend @multific, who helped me with a lot of ideas, and also with the final editing of the text. Love you, girl!!
×
On His Lips
“I’m telling you, Gregory won’t be ruling Hilltop for too long. The man is a prick. He sides with the Saviors and–” Colorful flying things get your attention, and when you look to your right, you see a bunch of balloons. “What is that?” Giving Daryl a look, you rush down the stairs into the open area, walking to where a small group of people stands. “Hey. What are you doing?”
“Hey, princess,” Laura says, and everyone quickly kneels. “We found some Helium and decided to make a competition.”
“What kind of competition?”
A silenced shot gets your attention and a balloon exploded midair. “We have to shoot the balloons. The higher we let them get before trying, the more points we get. I have thirty-five.”
“Doesn’t sound like your thing Laura.”
“Winner gets a peanut jar.”
“Mmm.” Looking at Daryl, who stopped some feet away, you smile. “Do you like a peanut?”
“Yeah.” He nods, glancing at the others.
“Then I’m in.” Smiling, you take the gun they’re using and tell Jared, the guy near the ballons to let one of them go. He releases a blue one, and you let it float away, the wind moving it a bit too far. You let it go as much as you can before shooting and successfully hitting it. “Bang!”
“And that makes… Twelve points.” Julian says from his place by the fence. There aren’t many walkers here, so there’s no problem.
“My turn,” Jared says and Anne takes his place.
The silly game goes on for a while, and you and Laura are the ones with the highest points. You do ask if Daryl wants to join, but he just said he trusts you to get that peanut jar. You understand him. Why would he even consider doing that with the people who wouldn’t think twice before killing his family? But you have to participate. You have to laugh and make heart eyes at Daryl… But the thing is the heart eyes aren’t even fake anymore.
“Oh, shit.” The exclamation gets your attention, and you almost miss the ballon.
Looking at Jim, you shrug your shoulders. “What? The game wasn’t my idea. Go piss off whoever invented it.”
“So defensive.” He chuckles, nodding at Daryl when he walks past him. “But that’s not what I meant.” Jim gestures at your legs, and you look down, taking in the simple dark jeans.
“Your statement will require further explanation.” Giving Anne the gun, you cross your arms. “What’s wrong with it?”
“Nothing. It’s just that… Uhm… It’s tight. You never wear anything that tight.”
“Oh…” Giving Daryl a look, you get a small, quick smile that crosses his lips. It’s been around a month since the last time you hurt yourself, and the wounds are finally closing. Once and for all, said Daryl, and wearing your jeans doesn’t hurt anymore. “I decided to change a bit. And they’re super comfortable so…”
“Hey,” Daryl calls, and everyone looks at him at the same time. “Stop lookin’.” He says in a lower voice and for some reason, your cheeks warm up.
“Sorry…” Jim whispers, and you don’t think you were supposed to hear it. “Anyways. I wanna try that. Tell me how it works.”
And after this embarrassing episode, Jim joins the small party and you shoot balloons until they’re over. Laura won because Jim distracted you a couple of times, but she wanted to give you the jar. You didn’t accept though. She won it fairly, and you’re not Negan.
You’ve been keeping it in your mind, repeating it to yourself. You’re not Negan.
After the morning walk and having lunch with your father, you have nothing else to do. So you have to talk to Daryl about the thing. The thing. You’ve been avoiding it because you’re getting confused towards him. And you kinda have the feeling he’s getting confused too. Not everything feels like a game anymore. And more than once you caught yourself holding his hand even when walking through empty halls.
But you need to see past all that because a lot depends on it. So, taking a deep breath and trying to keep it professional, you knock on his door. You still wear the key around your neck, but you decided to knock first. Daryl is not a prisoner anymore.
“Hey.” You mutter, stepping inside. “Hope you’re not busy. We need to talk about our plan.”
“Ain’t ever busy when it’s about keepin’ Alexandria safe,” Daryl says, following you to the couch. “Did somethin’ happen?”
“Nope. We just need to work on the next levels…”
“As in gettin’ the hell out of this hellhole?” He asks and you giggle. Daryl did keep the promise. He intends on taking you to live in Alexandria, and as much as you think this won’t work easily, you have this fantasy of having a good, calm life away from the Saviours.
“Not yet…”
“What then?”
“Negan has been… Accepting the fact that we’re together. It doesn’t mean he’s not angry about it and it doesn’t mean he won’t crush Alexandria the moment we break apart. But we need to be more… Public about our relationship before I can ask him to give me Alexandria.” Making way too many pauses, you try not to blush. But you’re certain you’re failing.
“I don’t get it. We walk around, holding hands, huggin’. How can it be more public than that?” Furrowing his eyebrows, Daryl tilts his head to the side.
You were expecting him to get it, so you wouldn’t have to say it. “I know but… I know Negan, and he has to be one hundred percent convinced, so… We should…” Damn it. Getting up to your feet, you pace around. You’re an adult with a good plan. Just spit it out. “We need to be seen kissing. And not just a peck in the lips. A real kiss. And we have to make sure the word will get to Negan and we have to do it in front of Negan.”
Then, silence. Of course, there would be silence. You’re growing to know Daryl and you know he’s not all that comfortable with certain proximities.
“Fine.” He simply says after almost a whole minute.
“Fine?”
“Yeah. I told ya I’d do anythin’ ta’ keep my family safe. Kissin’ ya won’t even be a great sacrifice. Just tell me when and we’ll do it.”
“No, no. If you act weird, it can be misunderstood. We need to… We need to act as if we’ve been doing it for quite a while so…”
“I don’t get it.”
Sighing, you clear your throat. “We need to train.”
“Train?”
“Mhmm.” Nodding, you sit down next to him again. “It has to look natural, mostly in front of Negan. He’s great at reading people and if he finds anything odd, he’ll push me against the wall and it’ll only force us to remain here longer.” Looking down at your hands, you shrug your shoulders. “I’m sorry you have to do this. I’m just trying to make it right so we can leave.”
“Fine.” He repeats, in a much lower and softer voice.
“Fine…” You mutter, slowly raising your eyes to look at Daryl. “I-I was thinking we could start now… I-if that’s alright with you.”
Daryl nods, blue eyes looking intensely at you.
“So… When was the last time you kissed someone?” The question only comes because you don’t know what to do. So talking will at least fill the silence.
“Two years before the outbreak, I think. Some hooker Merle set me up with.” Daryl looks down, a sad chuckle leaving his lips. “The asshole paid her to pretend she liked me.”
“I’m sorry your brother was a jerk.” You say, touching his forearm.
“How about ya? Have ya ever kissed Jimmy-boy?”
“No, never.” Smiling, you fold a leg under yourself. “For me, it was a high school crush. But after that nobody seemed worth kissing.”
“Sorry, yer being forced to kiss me. I’m not worth kissing either.”
“From all the men I met after the world went to shit, you’re the only one who really deserves to be kissed, Daryl Dixon.” Saying this changes things. It makes them complicated and turns this into more than just a meaningless kiss. But that’s something you need him to know. “Mmm… Let’s just do it then.”
“Alright.”
“Alright…” You repeat, hoping he can’t notice how your cheeks are probably as red as a tomato now. But knowing Daryl, you know nothing goes past him. “Let’s do this and see how we feel.” Clearing your throat, you move closer to him, hands on his shoulders. “Okay…” Your heart is beating so fast you wonder if he can actually hear it.
Kissing Daryl shouldn’t be this hard. If this is just something you have to do, like a job, to keep people safe, it shouldn’t be this hard. But right now, being so close, looking into his eyes, you can’t have this as only a plan.
Daryl was the first one you allowed in. The first one to understand how you feel about this place… The one who knows about your self-harm and who’s helping you not to do that anymore.
So he’s a lot more than just a plan.
Daryl is a good man. A handsome, amazing man, and you just noticed you want to kiss him. And not just because you’ll have to act up before Negan.
“Are we goin’ to do this or have ya changed yer mind?” Daryl speaks suddenly, and you notice you’ve been frozen for a while.
“Yeah, I just… Don’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable. So we should just start slow and… See how it goes.”
“Alright.” He reluctantly nods, and you know that he won’t make the first move.
So you decide to just do it.
Ending the small distance between you, eyes closed, you finally connect your lips to his on a simple kiss. It doesn’t really feel like a kiss since he didn’t do anything. But you gotta make it work, it doesn’t matter how you feel, or how he feels. This is bigger than both of you.
Taking his hands, you place one on your waist and the other on your cheek, but he barely touches you. It’s a beginning though. And you kiss him again, a little harder, moving to sit on his lap for better proximity. Then, he finally moves. Slowly, his lips start moving with yours, and you swear to God you feel a little dizzy, like the world stopped spinning.
This is good, you think. It’s working and that’s definitely something you can get used to. But then, unexpectedly, both of Daryl’s hands come to your waist, holding and pulling you closer, until your body collapses to his chest. Neither of you breaks the kiss, instead, it only grows, more intense, with more need. You don’t know what’s going on, but you don’t care. Wrapping your arms around his neck, you part your lips more, allowing him in, deepening the kiss. All other thoughts are gone, there’s nothing else than Daryl’s lips. And he tastes amazing, he feels amazing, holding you like that.
But eventually, you’re out of breath, so you have no choice but to break the kiss. But even when you’re apart, neither of you move away. You just stay there, catching your breaths.
“Good… That’s good… If we recreate this in front of Negan he won’t ever doubt us.” You whisper, your forehead on his. “We just have to… Keep doing this until it becomes natural…”
“I agree,” Daryl mutters right before kissing you again. But this time, he moves differently, and when you notice he’s pushing you, lying you down on the couch, you don’t even resist.
The next thing you know is that Daryl is on top of you, and you’ve been making out as if this was real. As if you were truly in love.
The whole world is silent as Daryl stares at the ceiling. His mind, unlike everything else, is very loud. What was supposed to be some kind of preparation for Negan to see, became a habit. It’s been a little more than a week since Daryl kissed the angel-like girl for the first time, and he doesn’t think he can go a day without doing that.
She tastes like heaven, like candy, and things he never thought he’d taste again. And he has become addicted to it, to her, because there isn’t a moment he’s not thinking about her.
And it seems like she enjoys his presence too, or else she wouldn’t be sleeping on his bed right now, curled up to his chest.
(Y/N) doesn’t know, but he likes to watch her sleep. Her beauty is captivating as always, and she looks peaceful. She barely moves now, unlike before, since she told Daryl her sleep was restless. But it changed, along with many things. She doesn’t hurt herself anymore, and the wounds are closed, never to be reopened. Because he’ll never let her do that again.
“Daryl…” She mutters, voice barely a whisper, getting his attention.
“Huh?” He grunts, a hand softly caressing her cheek.
“You’re warm.” (Y/N) says, fingers blindly finding his chin and a small, tired smile forming on her lips.
Daryl is a loss of words when it comes to (Y/N). A loss of feelings, a loss of thoughts. But he decided not to think too much. Daryl has always been a thinker, and he goes through things over and over again. But with her, he decided to just act. The future is still a big question mark, but somehow, he doesn’t know how yet, he found something good here. In this shitty place, filled with evil people. He found a ray of sunshine. A light inside the warm girl lying next to him.
Daryl never thought he knew what love is. And maybe he doesn’t know yet, but he’s sure the feelings (Y/N) provokes are part of it. So he’ll keep her close, he’ll protect her, and, when this is over, if she’s fine and wants a distance, he’ll stay away.
But right now, he can hold her. And so he will.
×
@riverscyberwife@spenciepoo338@beatitlikeabongodrum@amberritonicole@totheonethatloveshernext@the-artistic-animal@shatteredlovesick@cole22ann@thecraziestcrayon@cloud-laufeyson@arthurdeservedbetterrip
When I Found You (Pt. 07 of 19)
Pairing:Daryl Dixon X Reader | Negan X daughter! Reader
Word count: 2.6 K
Summary: You saw Negan build his empire, saw your father become a monster, a murderer, and never had the courage to stand your ground. So everything you do it help as much people as you can, carrying the guilt of being part of it. But one day, your world is shaken when you find him, the man with blue eyes locked up inside a cage. You decide to help him, to keep his community safe. And for that, you’ll have to pretend you and Daryl are in love… But how long until the lie becomes the truth?
Warnings:Some sensitive topics such as mentions and light descriptions of self-harm. (I kept it light, so don’t worry about graphic descriptions.)
A/N:I wanna thank (and give a lot of credit) to to absolutely awesome friend @multific, who helped me with a lot of ideas, and also with the final editing of the text. Love you, girl!!
×
A Little Piece of the Sun
“It’s nothing. Let go!” If you managed to keep it together, to keep a straight face, maybe you could fool him. Make him leave. But you’re breaking down, crying, yelling, pushing him. “Get out, Daryl!”
“Who hurt ya?” He asks, voice raised to match yours.
“Nobody! Get out.” In your crying, you don’t have enough strength to push Daryl. And even if you had, he’s bigger, taller, stronger. So it doesn’t take much until you’re pushed back to the living room, bitter tears clouding your sight.
“(Y/N), what–” He suddenly pulls your robe up, and your thighs get exposed. “What the hell is that?” He yells, but his expression softens, and when Daryl looks down at your vulnerable, broken figure, he’s not angry. Or mad.
He’s broken too.
“Why?” He asks in a lower voice, letting go of your robe.
A silence falls as you stand there, way too close in a place nobody can see you, crying, sobbing. Closing your eyes shut, you grab his vest, the one with angel wings, because you feel like you’re just about to fall. And if you do, you’ll break into a thousand pieces.
“I-I…” Stuttering, you shake your head. “Just leave me. Just leave me.” You plead, barely hearing your voice. “Please. Nobody can see that. Nobody can know.”
Silently and gently, Daryl pushes you down, and you sit on the couch. He then disappears into your bedroom, and you don’t even want to know why. Looking down at your hands, you see all the blood stuck under your nails. You didn’t have time to clean it.
When you hear him coming back, you look up, quickly noticing the first aid kit he’s carrying.
“Ya left it in yer bed.” He mumbles, settling down next to you. “Ya planned this.”
You don’t answer, you just keep looking at your hands. Daryl doesn’t say anything either. He moves to sit on the wooden coffee table, and slowly lifts your robe and gives you a look as if asking for permission. But you don’t mind. Your mind is too far away.
Daryl’s hands are soft, and as he cleans the wounds, that go from the top of your thighs to your knees, you flinch a little. But he’s fast, and soon enough he’s done, wrapping gauze around your thighs. Then, he puts the small box next to him and stares at you.
“I knew somethin’ was off.” He mutters, but still, you can’t bring yourself to look at him. “Ya always wear pants a little too baggy for ya. And ya grab yer legs when yer nervous or uncomfortable… I thought it was just a habit.”
Staring at Daryl’s blue eyes, you still can’t say anything. And what could you say anyway? Should you tell him how those people had fun killing his family?
A sob escapes your mouth and you hide your face with both hands. Nobody was ever supposed to see you this way. Nobody was supposed to know what you do to relieve the pain… Or payback for the pain you caused.
Daryl felt his heart breaking. Because hers is broken. Seeing (Y/N) like this, terribly, inconsolably sad… Seeing her hurt herself…
The tears glisten, reflecting the living room light, and Daryl knows he can’t stay still. He can’t just do nothing when she’s like that. So he gets up, without saying anything, and carefully bends over, picking (Y/N) Up in his arms. Of course, he expects her to push him, to give him an angry look, to ask him to let go of her. But instead, she silently, shyly even, wraps her arms around his neck, allowing him to lift her. Daryl takes carries the angel-like girl to her bedroom, setting her down on the bed.
She immediately curls up, the soft, pink fabric of her robe lifted, exposing the white gauze. But the image of the wounds, clearly made by fingernails, burns in his head. Long and slim, open, with blood still coming out of them. There are many, some brand new, others, older, were reopened. There are also scars, meaning she’s been doing that for a long time. She puts more strength on her index and middle finger, but the others do some damage too.
Daryl wonders what drives her to do this. To pierce and slice her skin. His eyes move through her body, taking in the sweet details he can’t stop thinking about. Her face is stained by many tears, which keep coming, but it doesn’t change how beautiful she is. Her little hands, clenched into fists, hide her mouth from him. When his eyes travel down, he feels his cheeks burning.
(Y/N) is the most beautiful woman he has ever seen, he can’t ignore it anymore. But she’s more than that. She was put in this life, surrounded by the worst people this world could create, she has been offered a position people would die for. She could rule this place, she could be just like her father. But she’s the far opposite.
By everything Daryl has seen of her, (Y/N) is honest, kind, and she’s trying to help people. He has seen her taking food and medicine, giving them to those who don’t have enough points to buy them. She’s different. A light in this dark place.
“Why are you staring…” She asks in a soft, low voice, teary eyes now open and set on him.
And it breaks his heart to see her this way. Daryl has to know why. He has to help her somehow.
“Why, (Y/N)?” Daryl asks, his voice, always a bit raspy, sounds soft. “Why would ya do this ta’ yourself?”
“You should be happy about it.” You burst out, sitting up, staring at him. “My father killed your friends. Your group, your family. You should be happy I’m getting hurt!”
“I–”
“This is what I deserve for all the people we’ve hurt. For those, we killed, for those we crippled, and for those who were left alive, suffering. I-I…” Your voice fades, and you look down, hands involuntary going to your thighs, squeezing them.
“Hey. Don’t!” Daryl is quick to grab both your wrists and you don’t even try to fight against his grip. He sits on the bed next to you, but you don’t dare to look into his eyes. “It’s not yer fault, hear me? What Negan does, that’s on him. Yer tryin’ ta’ help people, the best ya can, and this is who you are.”
It comes to you like a wrecking ball, crashing your ribs, destroying you inside out. You’ve seen what this world turned your father into. The monster it created. You know some people deserve to die because the world will be a better place without them. But a shot in the head is enough. What they do here is torture, madness… And they do it with innocent people, just because they can, or because they want to. “Daryl, I…” Stuttering, you feel yourself breaking down. But you can’t. Not in front of him. Or anyone. “Please, go… You’re not supposed to see me like this. N-nobody should see me like this.”
“Want me ta’ call Jim?”
“No!” You’re quick to answer. “No. He doesn’t know… He doesn’t… Not about all this… I-I’m all alone in this.”
“Not anymore.”
The moment he says it, you raise your head to look at him. “Y-you don’t have to… Really, I’m ok.” Your voice breaks in the end, because that’s a lie you’re tired to say.
Daryl is silent for a while, those bright blue eyes, beautiful and calming, set on yours. His presence makes you feel at ease, safe, and protected, something you haven’t felt in so long. “Come here.” He whispers, letting go of your wrists and arms opening to you.
For a moment, you’re frozen, tears never stopping to roll down, and you look at him.
You never thought you’d be in this situation with Daryl. Or that he’d even want to do that. But you don’t even try to fight it. You just collapse against him, head on his chest as more sobs run through your body.
“Shh. ‘S alright, Sunshine. ‘S alright.” Daryl mumbles, softly caressing your hair. It doesn’t take much until you both lie down, not letting go of each other.
You spend some time in silence, holding onto his vest, making sure he won’t go anywhere. After a while, your tears are dry, and the only thing getting your attention is the light headache and the familiar pain on your thighs. But besides that, everything feels peaceful.
“It’s getting late,” Daryl whispers, and you only nod. “I can leave ya to sleep if ya want.”
Yeah, you should probably let him go. But still, the thought of being alone again, with your thoughts and memories makes you shake your head. “C-couldn’t you stay? Just… Please.”
“Only if we talk about it. Do ya think ya can?”
No. “Okay.”
Then, more silence. “Wanna stay like this?” You quickly nod, not wanting to be away from him. This is an awkward position to be in. Lying on the bed, Daryl’s arms around you as you hide your face on his chest. But you need this. You need this man with you right now or else you’re sure you’ll break all over again. “Tell me why. No excuses, no justifications. Just plain and simple. Why do ya hurt yourself?”
“Because I’m part of this. And this… This gets people hurt. And killed.” Struggling not to cry all over again, you say it. The truth, all of it. For the very first time. “So I deserve this. Just a little bit of pain for all the agony I cause.”
“Yer not the one to do this. Ya don’t pull the trigger, ya don’t manage the knife.”
“Rob was eaten alive because he pushed me.”
“Rob was a rapist and a murderer.” He’s quick to add. “Heard the man talkin’. He deserved ta’ be dead.”
“But what about all the others?” Raising your head, you look at him. “What about Glenn and Abraham? What about all the sick games Negan played with your family? With Hilltop? All those good, innocent people just trying to survive.”
“Yer not Negan.” As he speaks, Daryl brings a hand to your cheek, fingers softly caressing your skin. “And I mean both because he’s yer dad and because of this whole ‘I am Negan’ thing goin’ on here. Yer not him, yer so much better.”
“D-do you really believe that?”
“Yeah.” He nods, eyes never leaving yours. “I hated ya in the beginning. Blamed ya for this too, for what happened to me, but now I see yer nothin’ like that. Yer nothin’ like them.”
“Daryl–”
“If this plan we have goin’ on works, ya could come live in Alexandria.” The words come out fast, and it looks like he’s still thinking about it as he speaks. But then, he nods, taking a deep breath. “Ya don’t need ta’ run away, stay alone. Ya could stay with us.”
“No, Daryl… They’ll hate me and they’ll be right to do so… And at least from here I can somehow help people.”
“We can find a way to keep helpin’ them, I know we can and…” His voice fades, and his face gets an expression you can’t read. “Once they know ya, they’ll like ya. I’ll tell them what ya did, what yer still doin’. They’re good people, they’ll see yer good too.”
Moving even closer, you close your eyes, your forehead touching his. “Would you really do that for me…?”
“I will. This is no place for ya, Sunshine”
“… Sunshine?” You ask, a low chuckle escaping your lips.
“Because yer a little piece of the sun in this dark, sick place.” He whispers after some seconds of silence. “The only good thing in here.”
“Two things then… Me and you.” You decide to add, despite your cheeks getting hot and red.
“Mmm.” He mumbles, moving his hand from your cheek to encircle your waist again. “Now get some sleep. Ya need it.”
“Will you stay… Until morning?”
“I will.”
• • •
You peacefully wake up, slowly and lazily, taking a deep breath. You’re quick to notice you’re not alone, and yesterday’s happenings come back to your head.
Daryl’s chest moves as he breathes, and for some reason you smile, snuggling closer to him, welcoming his warmth.
“Mornin’.” He suddenly says, startling you a little.
“Hi…” You mutter, rubbing your eyes. “Didn’t know you were awake.”
“Woke up a couple of minutes ago.”
“Mhmm.” You fall into a comfortable silence again until you notice something. “Did I move a lot? My sleep is restless so I’m always…” Your voice fades as you try to understand how you’re pretty much in the same position as yesterday night. “…I’m always moving.”
“Yer didn’t move at all,” Daryl says, and you sit up, looking down at him.
“Really?”
“Yeah…” He nods, sitting up as well. “I’m gonna make ya something to eat.”
“Daryl, wait.” You grab his hand before he stands up, making him sit down again. “What… What you said last night… Did you really mean it?” You didn’t want to just spit it out, but you need to know.
“I did.” He nods, eyes hidden by his hair. “All of it.” The fear that you felt disappears. The look on his face is the same as before, soft and kind. And when he takes your hand on his, you can’t help but smile. “Yer not alone. I know ya don’t like ta’ feel vulnerable but ya don’t have to hide it. Not from me, alright?”
“Alright.” You say, voice barely a whisper.
“C'mon, ya need ta’ eat.” He stands up and so do you, heading to the kitchen.
This time you help him make the sandwiches and eat in silence before organizing the kitchen. You’re finishing when a loud knock on the door gets your attention. And by the way, the person knocks, you know it’s Negan. Putting the dishcloth down, you look at Daryl.
“I’ll stay in the bathroom until he leaves.”
“No, no.” Taking a deep breath, you fix your hair the best you can. “We’re still playing. It’ll be good for us if he sees you here.” Walking to the door, you straighten your robe before noticing the bandages can be seen. “Shit.” Stepping back, you sigh. “Daryl. Open the door and let him in. Don’t say anything stupid, I need to change.”
“What do ya mean by don’t say anythin’ stupid?”
“Just open the door please. Trust me, he’s not going to hurt you.” Rushing to the bedroom, you take off the robe and put on the first clothes you find, ears paying attention to what’s going on in the living room. But you don’t hear anything after the door is open.
Putting some pants on and one of the old shirts you use to sleep you walk out, making sure to smile when you see Negan. “Hi, dad. What are you doing here so early?” Both men stand side by side. Daryl is tense, angry, as he always is when Negan is close by. And your father is beyond pissed off.
“I’m more interested in what he’s doing here so early.” Negan gestures at Daryl, walking over the couch and letting himself fall on it.
“He spent the night here.”
“What?!” Negan shouts, giving Daryl a hard glance.
“He just slept here.” You explain yourself, sighing, crossing your arms. “We were talking, it got late and I invited him to crash here.”
Shrugging your shoulders, you stare at Negan, who looks… Perplexed. Like he just realized something new. “Is it just me or are you and this piece of shit over there getting real?”
“First of all, Daryl is not a piece of shit.” Walking over him, you hold his hand, fingers intertwining. “And second, yes, we’re… We’re getting real.” Squeezing his hand, you give him a look.
“We’re datin’,” Daryl says, and you have to control yourself not to look surprised. You weren’t expecting that.
“You and your damn group are so lucky I love my daughter,” Negan says, the voice suddenly dark. He bends forward, elbows resting on his knees. “But I must tell you now when this is over, it’s over. I’ll hunt Rick down, and get my plans from where I left them.” He stands up, sighing. “I’ll annihilate you and your people from the face of Earth. I promise you that, Daryl. And if you ever hurt my baby, your death will take weeks.”
With another sigh and a nod, Negan moves to the door, but not before placing a kiss on your forehead.
“That was a threat,” Daryl mutters when your father is gone.
“I’m not gonna let him fulfil it. That’s my promise.”
×
@riverscyberwife@spenciepoo338@beatitlikeabongodrum@amberritonicole@totheonethatloveshernext@the-artistic-animal@shatteredlovesick@cole22ann@thecraziestcrayon
When I Found You (Pt. 02 of 19)
Pairing:Daryl Dixon X Reader | Negan X daughter! Reader
Word count: 2.4 K
Summary:You saw Negan build his empire, saw your father become a monster, a murderer, and never had the courage to stand your ground. So everything you do it help as much people as you can, carrying the guilt of being part of it. But one day, your world is shaken when you find him, the man with blue eyes locked up inside a cage. You decide to help him, to keep his community safe. And for that, you’ll have to pretend you and Daryl are in love… But how long until the lie becomes the truth?
Warnings:Some sensitive topics such as mentions and light descriptions of self-harm. (I kept it light, so don’t worry about graphic descriptions.)
A/N: I wanna thank (and give a lot of credit) to to absolutely awesome friend @multific, who helped me with a lot of ideas, and also with the final editing of the text. Love you, girl!!
×
“Are you sure this will work?” You ask Jim for the hundredth time.
His idea is good. You can make it work, you can make it believable. But it doesn’t depend on you alone. Daryl has to accept it and put some effort into it as well.
“It will.”
“How long do we have?” Walking fast through the halls, you try not to overthink. This can’t backfire, because you have no idea what to do if it fails.
“Eight weeks until Negan goes to Alexandria. But you know him, he could go anytime he wants, but since he’s eager to torture them psychologically, he may give it some time. Make them think they can come up with some kind of plan.”
Daryl’s group is smart. And strong. You and Jim are getting all the pieces of information about them, and about Negan’s plans. For you, it’s easy, you just have to ask Negan. But Jim’s job is to go around the men and get their ideas because sometimes some of them have an interesting addition to the plan that Negan is eager to follow.
So what you have is this: The leader, Rick, is a survivor. It means he had to get his hands dirty before, and will again. And your father knows how to break a man like Rick. He hates men like Rick. It doesn’t help that the Alexandrians killed several Saviours, and tricked Negan a couple of times before.
Your father wants to unleash hell upon them. And Jim was right, you’ve never seen Negan so furious about a group before.
He won’t just take their things and leave, no Negan will break them, slowly, painfully. He will strip them off of everything they care about, everyone they love, one by one, until he gets to Rick.
But you won’t let that happen.
“Ok.” Taking a deep breath, you stop by the apartment door. “If he doesn’t play along…”
“If he doesn’t play along, his group dies. Just tell him that.”
As if it was so simple.
Nodding, you unlock the door and walk in. Jim quickly pushes it close, gun already in hand. This could be dangerous. You wouldn’t blame Daryl for trying to attack you.
“Hello?” You mutter, moving to the living room and peaking into the kitchen. “We’re just here to talk.” Keeping your voice as soft as you can, you move towards the hall, as Jim does the same, walking ahead of you and pushing the first door open.
When he comes out, he simply shakes his head no before moving to the other room. “Where the hell is he?”
“Take it easy, Jim. I–” You’re cut short suddenly, a strong arm pulling you backwards, knocking all air out of your lungs. There’s something sharp and cold against your neck, as a giant hand grabs your shoulder, keeping you tight against the body behind you, painfully tight.
“Damn it!” Jim exclaims, gun pointing at whoever is holding you. But it doesn’t take much until your mind solves the mystery. “Let go of her. Now!”
“Drop the gun.” The voice, raspy and angry, comes right to your ear. “Or I’ll kill her.”
“Jim put it down.” You tell him, both hands coming to hold on the man’s arm as you struggle to breathe.
“I have a clean shot from here, asshole. She’s tiny, I can shoot you right in the head.” Jim cocks the gun, and the knife is pressed against your skin.
“Shoot me and she dies. I’ll draw this damn knife right through her throat.”
“Stop it, both of you!” Shouting, you suck in a sharp breath when Daryl moves, pulling you further away from Jim. “James, you do as I freaking say. Put the gun down now.” Using the strongest voice you can, you give him a stare. You hate ordering him around, but it’s necessary now. Your eyes are saying ‘trust me, I know what I’m doing’, and that’s what makes him reluctantly move, slowly lowering the gun until it’s on the ground, kicking it to the wall behind him. Way out of Daryl’s reach.
“Daryl, listen to me.” You start, keeping your voice soft. “We’re here to help you.”
“How? Gonna throw me in another goddamn cell!” He squeezes your shoulder, making you wince.
Jim steps forward, ready to fight, but you raise a hand at him, making him stop. “I know about your group. About Alexandria, everything. And I know Negan’s plans. I swear, I just want to help.”
“She was the one to bring you here, man, trust me,” Jim speaks up, both hands raised. “We spent all night trying to find a way of helping you and your group. You kill her, you’re doomed. You and everyone you care about.”
You feel Daryl’s grip get a bit loose, just a little bit, but enough for you to get what he’s thinking. Taking in the information. “What the hell does he plan to do with us?”
“The same, as a start.” You explain the pain on your shoulder bringing a few tears to your eyes. “He’ll take whatever he wants, and go back every once in a while. But he hates Rick, your leader, so he’ll put traps in the way, looking for a reason to torture them.”
“Huh.” He grunts.
“I was in the meeting. He wants to kill the Alexandrians one by one, make them chop off pieces.” Going graphic was never the idea, and it makes you feel sick. “H-he said he will make Rick go all the way next time. Cut his own son’s hand off.” Tears start rolling down as the emotions overwhelm you.
The image is in your head now, a father being forced to do such a thing. The axe, the blood, the severed hand… You need your cell. You need to let things out. You never wanted to be part of this. You never wanted to be here. But you can’t lose it, not now.
Blinking to push the stubborn tears away, you put yourself back together the best you can. This isn’t the place to be weak.
“How do ya know all that?”
“Negan is my father.” This makes the grip gets tighter than before, as the knife is now placed on your throat. “It doesn’t mean I agree with his methods!” You’re quick to add. “I have a plan to keep him away from your people. From Alexandria.”
“C'mon, man, you’re hurting her,” Jim begs.
“Keep yer damn mouth shut!”
“These are your options, Daryl Dixon!” You yell again, trying to make your voice heard despite everything. Despite his grip, the knife, and the situation. “You can kill me, kill Jim, take the gun and run. But you won’t get too far. They’ll take you, and as soon as they find out you killed Negan’s daughter, the man himself will make you watch as he feeds your people to the dead.” This wasn’t supposed to be this way, you didn’t want to threaten him. But you’ll say anything for him to let go of you. “Or you can at least hear me out. Because with or without your help, I’ll find a way to keep Negan away from this group because I’m not my damn father!” Voice cracking in the end, you close your eyes, letting the darkness surround you. This isn’t enough, but it has to suffice.
You’re becoming so weak. After so many years, being in this nightmare since the very beginning, you’re breaking. And you can’t break. You won’t know what to do if you break.
“Just listen to her, man,” Jim mutters, and when Daryl finally let go, you run straight into Jim’s arms, releasing a breath. “Damn it, (Y/N).” He whispers in your ear, softly rubbing your back. This hug isn’t about you being hurt by Daryl, it’s about you being hurt by everything else. Jim has developed a way of knowing when you’re about to collapse, exactly when you need some time to recover. “Can you do it? Because if not we can–”
“I’m alright.” Pulling away, you wipe the tears away before turning to face Daryl.
He’s wearing a black long-sleeved shirt, and now you get why his hand felt so big. The man is huge, and it’s clear now he didn’t hurt you as much as he could if he wanted to. His dark hair partly covers his eyes, but you can see the bright blue colour, set on you. He’s clean, and now you can see the purple bruise on his left cheek. Daryl still holds the knife, ready to act if you or Jim try anything.
“Can we sit?” Gesturing at the couch, you just make your way there, taking a sit. Jim does the same, taking the armchair. But Daryl just stands, those predator-looking eyes, following your every move. “You don’t have to look at me like I’m some kind of threat. Look at me. I couldn’t take you.”
“But yer boyfriend here could try.” Eyes locked on you, Daryl jerks his chin towards Jim.
“Jim is not my boyfriend. He’s… My personal bodyguard.” You sigh, running a hand through your hair. “Jim’s wife was dying. He was working for points so he couldn’t have the medicine. He stole it and got caught. His wife passed and he was going to die too for what he did, but I stepped in.” Exchanging a glance with him, you take in the small smile he has on, and also the sadness in his eyes. Jim is still in love with Mariam. “I told Negan I wanted someone by my side, at all times. And Jim was strong and well-built even before, so I had my will done. And here he is now, not only to protect me but as a faithful friend. As I am his.”
“It’s true. (Y/N) saved me.”
“So ya want me ta’ believe Negan does everythin’ ya want?” Daryl is sceptical, but anyone in his position would be. You’re still one of his captors, and you could be setting some kind of trap.
“(Y/N) is everything Negan has left. Say whatever you want from him, it’ll probably be the truth, but he loves his daughter.” With both elbows on his knees, Jim looks up at Daryl. “She’s the princess around here. And the king will do whatever she says. If she wanted to tear you to pieces just for her pleasure, he would clap.” Jim’s voice gets darker because he stands where you stand. He does what he has to do to survive, but he doesn’t enjoy it. “But instead, she puts on a show out there, just so she can act behind his back helping people. She could be a tyrant, the very image of her father but she isn’t. So if (Y/N) can help you and your people to make out of this mess alive, take the freaking chance or get the hell out of her way.”
Furrowing your eyebrows, you try to understand where it came from. Jim never said anything like this.
“We came up with a plan to make Negan give up on your community.” You say, taking a deep breath. “Of course we’d have to say Alexandria would be mine to rule and shit like that, but I promise you if we manage to make this work, he’ll leave your people alone.”
“And what is this miraculous plan?”
This is the hard part. Biting your lip, you exchange a long stare with Jim, who raises both his eyebrows at you.
“We’ll have to pretend to be dating.” Saying it as slow as you can, you feel a heat spreading through your cheeks.
“What the hell?”
“I know how it sounds.” Standing up to your feet, you raise both hands at him. “But all the other options weren’t good enough. Negan hates your group like he never hated anyone before, and Jim and I came to the conclusion that the only way he’ll step back is if I put my heart on the matter.” Shrugging your shoulders, you sigh. “If we convince them we’re falling for each other, he will let me have Alexandria. And if he places the city under my care, nobody will come to take anything. Nobody will be killed.”
Daryl weakly nods, his hair all over his face. “Fine. But if ya lie ta’ me, I kill ya.”
“You–”
“We have a deal.” You speak before Jim does, reaching out your hand. Daryl looks at it before looking up at you again, not taking your hand, so you let it fall. “Well, you’ll stay here now. There’s food and… Pretty much everything you may need. I’ll talk to Negan and let you know the next step.” That said, you nod, mostly to yourself, gesturing for Jim to follow as you leave.
Right before you push the door close, you take one last look at Daryl. Then, the wood separates the two of you, and you lock the door, sliding the key into your pocket.
“It’ll work,” Jim says, a hand on your shoulder.
“It has too.”
When Daryl is left alone, the silence, now very familiar, surrounds him again. In a jolt of adrenaline, he has an impulse of checking if what she said was true. Everything he had done ever since the Saviors dragged him into this apartment was to shower, clean the blood from his wounds, put on some clothes, and sleep.
So, he’s quickly moving through the kitchen, opening the cabinets and fridge, finding more food than he has seen since the world broke.
To say he’s confused is a misunderstanding. When he first saw her, from the darkness of his cell, he wondered if he was seeing an angel. Her smooth skin, clean and shining, as if she didn’t belong to this world anymore. Her hair, rolling down her shoulders, reaching all the way to her waist. And he swears he could smell her hair conditioner, candy-like. It took a while for him to believe she was real.
But she’s Negan’s daughter.
And Daryl has to be careful, smart. He will do anything if it means his group will be safe. But still, he has to be alert. In case this is a trap. In case she’s not as good as she shows.
There are no angels, not in this world. Not living among these people.
And she certainly isn’t one of them.
×
When I Found You (Pt. 01 of 18)
Pairing:Daryl Dixon X Reader | Negan X daughter! Reader
Word count: 2 K
Summary:You saw Negan build his empire, saw your father become a monster, a murderer, and never had the courage to stand your ground. So everything you do it help as much people as you can, carrying the guilt of being part of it. But one day, your world is shaken when you find him, the man with blue eyes locked up inside a cage. You decide to help him, to keep his community safe. And for that, you’ll have to pretend you and Daryl are in love… But how long until the lie becomes the truth?
Warnings:Some sensitive topics such as mentions and light descriptions of self-harm. (I kept it light, so don’t worry about graphic descriptions.)
A/N:I wanna special thanks (and give a lot of credit) to my absolutely awesome friend @multific, who helped me with a lot of ideas, and also with the final review of the text. Love you, girl!!
×
Blue Eyes
You’re not the type of person who uses the end of the word as an excuse to have your way with things. To take what isn’t yours, claim and keep it, just because you happen to have the upper hand. You never had it in you, the evilness, the darkness to fall into such position.
But here you are, surrounded by those who think otherwise.
Walking fast through the halls, your mind plays back everything you heard. You had to sit there, smile and nod, as Negan spoke about what he did. And what he plans to do. It makes you sick, almost to the point of throwing up what you had for lunch, only a couple of hours ago. Their description was graphic.
Negan told you all about how the guy’s eyeball popped out, and how he was still standing.
You can deal with the dead, their falling skin, and disgusting, rotting corpses… But the living… Maybe it makes you a pussy, but you don’t care. There’s still humanity in you, and as stupid as it may be, you hope there’s still a way of life that doesn’t suck other people dry. A way to survive without having to steal, cheat or kill.
With a hand on your stomach, tears started to fill your eyes, you’re relieved when you reach the hall, a breath flowing out as your fingers struggle with the locker.
This cell is the only place you feel alone. Where you allow yourself to cry. The only place you allow yourself to be weak.
Of course, it doesn’t always work. Sometimes you break down in your apartment too, but still, you can’t set yourself free from these cold, dark walls.
When the locker clicks, you sigh, sliding the metal door open. But the wave of relief is taken back as you freeze, your attention falling on the figure in the darkness, dirty and naked. His eyes, unbelievably blue, reflecting the light coming from the hall behind you, are quick to find yours.
For a moment, you wonder if this is real. With a hand holding the metal and the other flat next to your body, all words and thoughts seem to have left you. Whoever this man is, he’s not only being held a prisoner. Nobody here is just a prisoner. They’re always here for a reason, and they’re treated like animals until they break.
You never saw anyone in this position, but your heart breaks for him. There’s strength in his eyes, anger… But there’s also pain.
“What are you doing here?” The voice snaps you out of your state, and you blink a few times, stepping back and turning to find Dwight.
Shaking your head lightly, you quickly remember to put on the act. It’s better this way. “Excuse me?”
“Oh.” He exclaims before falling on one knee. “Forgive me.”
“What are you doing here?” You repeat his question, very aware of the man in the cell, feeling his eyes on you.
“I came to feed him.” Dwight stands back up, showing you the tray he’s holding with a single sandwich that looks disgusting.
“What the hell is that?”
“Dog food.” He quickly answers, not seeming to be bothered by it. “Your father’s orders.”
Your father’s orders indeed.
Clenching your hand into fists, you take a deep breath. “Go and make me one of your sandwiches. The real thing.” Keeping your voice nice and soft, you take the tray from his hands. “Double that, actually. Let’s have a nice meal together, you and I.”
Dwight furrows his eyebrows before nodding, leaving at a fast pace to follow your command. Of course, he finds it weird, you never spoke to him. But you don’t care about what he thinks. Your instructions are to be followed, without questioning. As are Negan’s.
Leaving the tray on a small wooden table near the wall, you turn back to the man. He didn’t move, but his eyes are set on you.
You helped a lot of people here without Negan knowing about it because they were under his radar. But you get the feeling this man isn’t. But still, you can’t see yourself walking away, leaving him in this dark cell, eating that shit, and going through whatever your father has in store for him.
Quickly walking over to the cell, you stop by the door, unsure if you should step any closer. Crouching down, you wonder why he hasn’t broken eye contact yet. There’s a gun with you, secure in the holster attached to your thigh. But you hope you won’t have to use it. “Hey.” You whisper, wondering what else could you say. “I’m sorry they’re doing this to you.” They? You’re part of this too, whether you want it or not. “I’ll try to help–”
“(Y/N)?” The voice, familiar this time, makes you stand up. “What… The hell is going on?” Jim is quick to approach you, peaking inside the cell.
Sighing, you pull the door close, but only halfway. “Dwight, he…” Running a hand through your hair, you feel a little dizzy. But you must get it together. This is not the place to break down, someone else might come. “I came to the cell and found this man. Dwight is giving him dog food.”
“Alright, breath.” Jim holds both your arms, and you do as he says. He’s the only one who knows how you feel. At least some of it. But he does know you come to this cell every once in a while, and he knows it makes you mad to see how some people are treated here. “What do you want to do about this?” He glances at the man, and you do the same. He seems… Interested in this conversation. And why wouldn’t he be? This must sound like some kind of trap to him, coming from his captors.
“I don’t know.” You start listening to footsteps, so you stand up straighter, as you feel like you’re falling into character. It doesn’t take much until Dwight comes to your sight, a small plastic Tupperware in his hand. “Good. Took you long enough.”
“I’m sorry for the delay. James.” He mutters, handing you the plastic box.
Taking a look at both sandwiches, you smile. They’re delicious, you bet. “Well, let’s eat.” Without any ceremony, you step inside the cell, reaching out your arm and giving that man the Tupperware.
“Wait.”
“Shut up.” You bark, as the man basically rips the thing from your hand after some seconds of hesitation, and starts devouring it. “You’ll eat too, Dwight.” You say as you move back to the wooden table, leaning on it, both hands resting on each side of the tray.
Dwight scoffs, exchanging a glance with Jim. “I–”
“You know I never ask twice.” With a warning tone, you push the tray forward. “Eat.”
Your voice echoes a little as you raise it, growing impatient. You were deprived of a moment you needed so much, stomach feeling weird and head spinning. Push it back, you tell yourself. Keep it locked up. This isn’t your cell, you can’t break down now.
When Dwight takes the sandwich and bites it, you wish you could show off a bright smile, as Negan would. Happy to see your command followed, delighted to humiliate someone. But that’s not how you feel at all.
Dwight chokes a little but swallows his bite, eyes on you, wondering if that was it. “How long has this man been here?”
“Some days. Three or four, I think.”
“And I believe you have been feeding him with this shit since the beginning, am I right?” Crossing your arms, you pace around. Dwight nods, and by the look on his face, you can tell he’s waiting. Waiting for the next move, or some sort of torture. You could easily get it done. Negan backs you up about everything. You can throw Dwight into this very cell, feed him dog good for a week, burn him, cut off a finger or two… Anything you want.
This world belongs to you too, says Negan, and your desires must be attended to.
“Then finish your sandwich.” You simply say because you might have Negan’s blood, but you don’t share his principles.
Dwight is fast to obey, probably thinking it’s best to just get done with it. And you watch, occasionally glancing at the man. He’s cold, it suddenly gets to you. The nights are terrible, and the thought of him there, completely naked, shivering all night long makes you clench your hands into fists.
“I want you to stay here until my men come.” You start, a hard stare set on the blond. “They will carry out my orders, and if Negan happens to come here before they do, you’ll find me immediately. Did I make myself clear?”
“Absolutely.” He sounds confused, and you can see the gears moving in his head as he tries to understand what you’re doing.
But he doesn’t have to know. “Great. Jim, c'mon.”
“Right away.” He mutters before following you.
•••
It does look like you have everything under control from the outside because inside your head, you’re walking in the dark. Pacing around your living room, a hand playing with your lower lip, you try to come up with the next move.
A low knock on your door gets you moving, unlocking and pulling it open before allowing Jim to come inside.
“It’s done.” He says, looking down at you as he takes something from his pocket. “He was set in the apartment and this is the key.”
Taking the small piece of metal, you hold it in your hand, bring the fist to your heart. “What do I do, James?” This was settled in a rush, and you don’t know what your father wants with that man. You do feel better to know he’s in a good place now, where he won’t be cold or hungry. But the rest… You’re clueless.
“I have bad news, (Y/N).” Jim starts, making his way over the couch. You follow but chose to stand on your feet. “I went around, listened to some people, and put the pieces together. That man’s name is Daryl, and he’s part of that group from Alexandria.”
“Shit.” You mutter, biting your index finger.
“Yeah, shit. Negan’s hate for that group reaches a whole new level.”
“I know.”
“Alexandria is promising. And we know they’re making alliances with different communities, so it means they won’t only survive, they’ll prosper. And have a hell of a good life as we have here. Maybe even better.”
“I know.” You repeat, eyes on the floor.
“Negan doesn’t want to just take their stuff, he wants them to give him a reason so he can punish them.”
“I know.” Dropping to the couch beside him, you sigh. You had to listen, for hours, Negan talking about that group. How they fooled him, killed many of his men. And your father developed a fury towards Rick, their leader, that you never saw before. “I don’t care, Jim. I’ll tell father to leave them alone.”
“And what will you say when he asks why?”
“I’ll say Daryl and I are friends.”
“(Y/N), you can’t possibly think Negan will give up on a whole community over someone you befriend overnight.”
What would you do without Jim? He’s the one to do the thinking when you’re overwhelmed, unable to put things together. “I’ll make him believe.”
“Your father does everything you ask, but without a believable reason, he’ll think you’re joking around and laugh at your face. You know it. You know him.”
Closing your eyes, you run a hand through your hair. “What should I do then?”
“Why do you want to help this man so much? You don’t know him, he could be evil.” Jim touches your back, rubbing it softly.
“I know evil. I’m surrounded by evil men. He isn’t. I saw it in his eyes…” You have no idea how to explain it, you just feel it. You just know it, somehow. “He’s a good man, Jim. Trust me.”
“I do. And I might have an idea, but I’m damn sure this Daryl won’t go with it.” Jim is suddenly thoughtful, that blank expression he makes when he’s putting some sort of plan together. “It’s quite crazy, but it might work. I can see Negan buying it if you work well.”
“I’m in. What is it?”
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