#i’ll never write it

I have a fun AU idea for OFMD. Instead of Stede being a rich dandy, he’s actually an android servant to an eccentric old rich dude, but he’s programmed to be a gentleman servant - so he dresses in his frills and knows all the ways of pageantry with high society. At the end of his owners days, he tells Stede he’s more family to him then anyone else, since Stede was there to care for him in the end. He decides to leave Stede his vast fortune and helps Stede come up with a plan to pass himself off as a human and become a pirate - so he can get out to sea where hopefully he’ll be free to live his life how he wants.

A lot of the story goes the same way, with meeting Ed and falling in love, but being an android Stede really doesn’t know how human emotions work and doesn’t understand why he feels the way he does when with Edward.

In the end Stede is somehow recognized for what he really is, and they’re separated with Stede being send to Mary Bonnet, a distant niece of the old man that should have inherited him in the first place.

I can’t decide if Ed would be able to rescue him or if Stede still “comes out” to Mary and she helps him escape all over again to go find Ed. I just like the idea of android Stede and human Ed.