#johanna finegan

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Revoice was the first ever national conference that supports LGBT Christian who wish to live out a traditional sexual ethic. Spiritual Friendship is a community of several “Side B” Christians who want to explore ways to live out their faith in a way that is unique to their experiences. Here are some of my takeaway points from the Spiritual Friendship Pre-conference and Revoice Speakers.

Ron Belgau

My main takeaway points are introducing what spiritual friendship is. He mainly used David and Jonathan as an illustration of a committed friendship. These two men not only committed their lives, but also the lives of their kin, to one another. He emphasized how society can only see love in romance, but not in friendship. Christians in America need to look at how God views friendship if they want to learn to accept new ways to live out a life of love.

Johanna Finegan

This woman knows what’s up. She starts off reminding the audience that most people assume everyone wants to be fulfilled sexually and romantically. That’s what makes Side B gay Christians uncomfortable because it makes them feel like their choice to be celibate is wrong. “Homosexual” doesn’t mean a person is sexual. These Christians are just asking for pastoral care that is specific to their needs. Being a minority in the church means a lot of what is said in the pulpit will not apply to you. This group is shoved into the corners and into the shadows. Then the group meets at a conference in St. Louis and is surprised to learn that they are not alone in their experiences at church. In fact, we shouldn’t be shoving these people in corners. We should be looking to see how God is using those who are surrendering their sexuality to Him. These Christ-lovers are simply saying that there is something more worthy than their sexual and romantic lives.

To a critic who thought rejecting the call to marriage wasn’t manly, she responded that there is nothing unmanly about refusing to marry a woman by believing he won’t be a gift to her, than marrying in order to self-indulge, to hide, and to find passive acceptance in the church. Mic drop. 

Brother Trout

Coming from a different perspective, Brother Trout shared his experiences about the changing values of morality from the present to future generations. As a high school teacher, he noticed that the “You can do anything you want to do!” mantra was causing kids to feel burdened, directionless, unsuccessful, unsure, and - in the end - complacent. On the flipside, limits (such as the limits that come with celibacy) define a clear narrative we can strive for. I was more struck by how much I could relate to the negative effects of that mantra.

Eve Tushnet

I was yearning to see a convert in the gay Christian community, and I’m glad to see this representation on stage. A “convert” is a Christian who didn’t grow up in the church but chose to follow Christ later on in life (that’s me!). Tushnet was shocked at why it was easier for gay converts to learn to praise Jesus than gay people who grew up in the church. Like others from the Spiritual Friendship blog, Tushnet was able to elevate the meaning of friendship by giving examples of David and Jonathan, as well as Ruth and Naomi. Straight Christians are afraid of the word “same-sex love”, but there it was in the Bible. It’s time to explore what God was trying to say with this form of friendship.

Ray Low

Yaas Asian American representation yass. “Life isn’t about what you can take from the world. It’s about what you can give.” I wholeheartedly agree with Low. The church NEEDS our voice. I owe it to him to kickstart me on this journey to share what I’ve learned with the world. I have something to say now, and I have an entire community who will back me up.


I just needed a place to dump my notes and thoughts from the conference. The Side B community needs to be heard, and the Church needs to support them. If you’d like to listen to these individuals who are leading the Side B dialogue, listen to their keynotes here.

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