#kangjoon

rkkangjoon‌:

the moment she started to talk, kang joon knew she wasn’t ok at all. yooa sounded tired and down, maybe training wasn’t going the way she wanted it to, maybe she had been scolded just like he had been a few months ago. she was right, he was busy preparing for debut now, but how would he be able to focus, when he knew of a friend in need? “what happened?” he asks, concern building up in his voice, the initial playfulness gone at the spot. usually he wasn’t the first guy coming to mind, whenever his friends needed someone to talk to, but he was more reliable than one would assume.

while walking down the streets towards the dorms, kang joon let his eyes wander, as he listened to her story. he knew she had been in a relationship for a while, though he had never heard any details. probably due to the same reasons most trainee couples tried to keep things as secret as possible. kang joon knew too well how toxic the industry could become for relationships, he knew how easily it was to break apart, when their dream were on stake.

before he was able to reply and tell her, he would come to any place she would tell him, she hangs up on him. perplexed he stares at the black screen, a message popping right up. after checking the sent address, he turns around and gets on his way. it’s been a while, since he had met her, and it was a little sad they would see each other again under such circumstances. as soon as he got there, he knocked at the door.

“I’m here.”

for once, shiah isn’t worried about her status and how her guest would interpret it. usually she kept it under wraps that she was from old money and had lived a socialite life for a while. she trusted kangjoon though, and she didn’t really think he’d be one to judge her for it. others had, but kangjoon was a genuine soul. it’d be fine. 

she hears the knock at the door and she tells the housekeeper not to answer. she shuffles off moving to answer it, and there he stands. he came, right away. holy crap. that was relieving, but also gave a sense of impending doom since she knew her emotions were about to run wild again. “h-hey, come in.” she steps aside, holding the door open so he can come in. she grabs a pair of guest slides for him and drops them by his feet for him, then vaguely gestures towards the living area. “thank you for coming.”

shiah’s a wreck. she’s in comfy clothes, her hair is pulled back in a sloppy bun, and her face is bare and raw, red with remnants of her tears from the day. her eyes are swollen, her lips have been bit to the point of bleeding here and there. she’s just… not doing well. before she sits down, she shuffles up to him, sliding her arms around his middle loosely and laying against his chest in a weak hug. “seriously… thank you…” 

rkkangjoon‌:

debut was so close in range, it was actually scary to him. the insecurity to be not good enough was still haunting him, forcing him to keep up his practice. there was no time to slack off. so he once again ended up staying late at the royal building, instead of returning to the dorm with the others. none of them could take away that anxiety that was buried deep inside of his heart, and none knew a better way than to work on his skills. for the time being he just wanted to keep it that way, to do his thing and do what he thought was best for him.

when he decided to end the practice of the day and after taking a refreshing shower, he picked up his sports bag and his water bottle. on his way home, he took out his phone to plug in his headphones, just to notice a incoming call notification. wondering if it was baekhyun who was worried about him missing at home, he unlocked his phone to see the contact name. “yooe?” he mumbled to himself, raising a brow at the surprising call. they were both at the same company, so if they wanted to talk, they would just need to look and reach out to one another. but he guessed it was rather hard to catch him now with all the debut preparations, so he accepted her call.

yooa was one of the female trainees he had a good relationship with. they were on friendly terms and while he had always felt that she had a crush on him, they had always remained on the friend base. things were good that way, he was sure neither of them wanted to destroy their friendship. “hi yooe, wassup? what are you doing?” he wasn’t too sure what the call was actually about, since it was already late at night, but he supposed it was rather important to her to give him a call over.

“oppa..” 

her voice was raspy and tired, all of the crying leaving her a wreck. she rubs at her eyes, trying to keep herself somewhat alert as she speaks. “oppa… i know you’re busy… debut… but i–” she bites her lip, pain swelling in her chest again as she thinks on everything that transpired that day. “i need a friend right now, and you came to mind…”

she sighs, sitting herself up on her bed, raking a hand through her hair. “i’ve… i was in a relationship with a girl named seulgi for a year and a half, and we broke up today since she’s debuting soon. i’m… i don’t–” she felt so frustrated, emotions and hurt bubbling up, and she couldn’t piece together her thoughts or what she wanted to say. “i don’t want to be alone right now. i’m…” i’m hurt. say it shiah, it’s okay to admit it. “if you have the time… please come over. i’ll text you my address.”

she hangs up, not really allowing him a chance to respond. she doesn’t mean to be rude, but if he started fretting over her she’d probably start crying again, and she’d rather have a break from that before he comes over, if he does, because she knew once he showed up she’d break down again. she takes a breath, making sure she’s stable enough before she starts typing out her address in a text and sends it to him. “please come…” she mumbles to herself, then heads off to wash her face, hoping it’d help get rid of the salty tear stains on her skin. 

the day is tough, after all is said and done, but she didn’t expect the night to be worse. she figured the initial shock and pain from the break up would start to ease and maybe she’d be emotionally exhausted and be able to sleep because of it. boy, was she wrong. a year and a half, gone just like that. 

on the one hand she gets it, and that’s why she didn’t give seulgi a hard time over it. shiah was just as ambitious, and she knows seulgi had been training for longer than she had. the desire to make sure everything goes right was something shiah more than understood. it just… sucked. she didn’t want to feel like she wasn’t worth fighting for, or that it was so easy to be dropped at the sight of debut, but… well, that’s kind of how she felt. what made all of that difficult was how well she understood the reason behind it. how could she be mad when she couldn’t blame her? heartbreak was easier to deal with when she could be angry about it, that’s how she dealt with toshi leaving her out of nowhere. this was rough, because she couldn’t be mad, so she didn’t know how to cope, and it was driving her absolutely insane. 

why kangjoon was the one who came to mind to turn to, shiah didn’t know. maybe it was the long lost crush she had had on him once upon a time, maybe it was the fact that she used to vent to him about toshi, past lovers, so her mind landed on him. either way, everything was a blur, and suddenly she had her phone on her ear while she laid in her bed and his ringtone playing through the ear phone as the call attempted to connect.

“pick up, please… oppa, pick up…”

@rkkangjoon