I hate how white people invented the we don’t owe each other anything mindset
its a leftover from the mindset we got after food scarcity got so big in 1945 we had to eat plant bulbs and 30k people starved to death in one winter. expecting someone else to feed your kid is seen as pretty rude & especially if you leave the other parent with extra food that the kid wont eat now because thats wasted food. it might seem weird, but thats where its from
If you’re invited over for dinner then yeah ofc you’re being fed but dutch people tend to buy and cook exactly how much they need and no extra. we usually dont make extra dinner and eat that as leftovers the next day because we only eat warm food once a day
so if youre coming over unexpectedly and expect to stay over for dinner either you get told no or everyone goes hungry because youre getting a plate of scraps from other people’s plates which is awkward af and then no one gets enough food. youre usually expected to leave before dinner anyway if youre not invited
don’t know how to tell you this but plenty of peoples’ ancestors suffered famines without becoming multi generational assholes
This is so freaking strange. I’m Russian, and I’ve been taught since childhood that if a person visits you (even a short visit!), at the very least you offer them tea and snacks. If they are staying for several hours (watching movies or just hanging out and talking) then you offer some real meal. Got constant grief from my mom cause I hate cooking and my sis and I usually just ordered pizza (she insists the meal should be personally made by yourself). And, like, every time an older generation of my family invites guests, “setting a table” for them is a very big deal
Reminds me of a story my acquaintance once told me. She was an exchange student in Germany, and she and her friends invited their German fellow students to their place. As per tradition, they made a lot of food (guests! we need to feed them!). And when their German friends arrived they were extremely surprised by it and said they already ate at home. Because apparently that’s what you do when you are invited to someone’s house. And all of Russians were “Whaaaat???”
