Look, I think it’s pretty clear that if you watch VOYAGER carefully, Neelix was high all the time and the only reason Janeway kept him around was because he was her dealer and she needed something to come down from all that coffee.
It actually would have been really nice if Neelix’s character arc across Voyagerhad been one of coming to realise that it’s neither necessary nor healthy to pretend to be happy all of the time. Unfortunately, I can’t help but feel that the writers themselves kind of forgot that it was all an act.
There could have been a brilliant episode where Tuvok of all people gets really confrontational (you know, in that very dispassionate way) asking Neelix why he feels the need to do it and then for once it’s Tuvok showing Neelix that he can just be and not have to put on an act all the time.
…this is brilliant, actually.
So much of the Vulcan character development in various series just amounts to behaving more like humans; I think it would be nice to turn around and say that actually, sometimes they have a point.
As we’ve noted before, Neelix is a genius in fixing meals from strange ingredients (leola root, anyone?!). This time, we’ve got pasta made from the mature hair follicle of the Alfarian (VOY: Parturition). However, I would advise just *eating* the pasta, not throwing it at your rivals like Neelix did! The recipe below is for the pasta only - you can top it with a tomato sauce or channel Neelix and get creative with your toppings.
If you have never made pasta from scratch before, I would advise you to give it a go! You do need to set aside some time but it is a nice way to spend an hour or two. While it is a lot easier to make pasta with a pasta roller, you can just roll out your dough on a well-floured surface, rolling as thin as possible. The dough can then be cut in whatever shapes / strips you wish or used to make ravioli. To replicate the Alfarian hair pasta, cut the strips as thin as possible.
Replicate your own (Makes enough to serve 3-4).
9 ounces / 255 grams plain flour 3 eggs
Place the flour in a medium bowl and make a well in the middle. Crack the eggs into the well and mix with a fork until you have a shaggy dough.
Knead the dough until it is smooth, about 5 minutes. Wrap in plastic wrap and place in the fridge for 30-60 minutes.
Cut the dough into quarters to make it easier to work with. If using a pasta roller, begin with the thickest setting and continue to roll out the pasta until you get to setting 4 or 5. Alternatively, flour your benchtop and a rolling pin well and roll out as thin as possible. A heavy rolling pin helps with this.
When your pasta is thin enough for your liking, slice strips as thin as possible to create the individual pasta strands. Bear in mind they will thicken when cooked. A sharp paring knife works well.
The pasta can be hung and dried, or cooked straight away. If cooking straight away, bring a large saucepan of water to the boil and add a tablespoon of salt. Add the pasta and if needed, give it a quick stir to stop it sticking to the bottom of the saucepan. The pasta will only take a couple of minutes to cook and is ready when it floats to the top.
As soon as the pasta is cooked, remove it from the water and run under cold water to ensure it doesn’t overcook. Drain it and serve immediately, topped with a tomato or bolognese sauce. It is useful for throwing at potential romantic rivals but will be more tasty if you eat it.
This is just great! We’re now moving into the area of being able to make an entire meal out of leola root - thanks to Neelix’s inventive use of this ingredient. We’ve previously made the starterandthe dessert, now we can move on to the main course (VOY: Repentance).
Like the other leola root dishes, I don’t think this is half bad. Frankly I think the Voyager crew overreact a bit about leola root - it might be a little on the boring side if you eat it again and again but it is still tasty. This recipe is very forgiving, so if you don’t like the vegetables included or want to add more, feel free to change it. But don’t forget the leola root otherwise Neelix and the Voyager crew will be very unhappy!
Replicate your own (Serves 2-3 - can be a main or a side dish).
1 cup brown rice 1 ½ cups vegetable stock (or substitute water) 40g/1.4oz fresh peeled ginger, grated 1 small onion, diced fine 1 small carrot, diced fine 1 tablespoon vegetable oil Juice of 1 lemon 1 bunch parsley Salt and pepper to taste
Start by rinsing and soaking the rice - rinse the rice until it runs clear and then cover with cold water and leave while you prepare the vegetables.
Next, prepare the ginger and vegetables. Add the vegetable oil to a heavy-bottomed pan with a lid or a rice cooker and place over medium heat (or switch on your rice cooker). Add the onions and cook for about 5 minutes, until they start to soften and turn translucent. Add the carrots and cook for a further 5 minutes.
Add half the grated ginger and stir through.
Drain the rice and add it to the pan and stir so the rice is coated in the oil. Add the vegetable stock and bring to the boil, stirring so the rice doesn’t stick to the bottom of the pan.
Reduce to a low simmer and place the lid on the pan (or alternatively set your rice cooker to cook). Simmer gently for about 30 minutes or until the rice has absorbed all the liquid and is soft when eaten.
Remove it from the heat and stir through the lemon juice. Chop some parsley and stir that through too, saving some for a garnish. Add the remaining ginger and salt and pepper to taste.
To serve, garnish with the parsley. This can be served hot or cold. Follow with a serving of leola root tart.
