ᴏɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʀᴏᴏꜰᴛᴏᴘ

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pairing:tasm!peter parker x fem!reader

summary:one thing led to another and the argument you had with peter a couple weeks ago put a rift in your relationship, when spiderman comes in unannounced at your pit party, it only opens a door to two idiots finding their peace with one another.

genre:angst, ex-friends(ish) to lovers, fluff

word count: 3.2k+

note:this is just a blurb i wrote bc nothing is working out for me rn so i needed to destress with this fine ass man

masterlist

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As much as it was difficult to discern between the glossiness of your eyes and the blurry skylines of Queens, you really wanted to guess it was tears that were causing this.

The wind was biting and unforgiving, and although you had initially thought it would be this chilly, there was a whole new set of emotions that sent your body in a rigid form.

There was a box of pizza next to you, and even if your stomach rumbled, you knew you couldn’t hold the food down for long.

With the air that rushed past your ears and the erratic thumping in your weak chest, you missed the little thump that came from behind you.

“Whoa…” Your shoulders froze at the voice, “You’re not um,” You whipped your neck around, mouth falling open in surprise when you saw who it was, “You’re not thinking of jumping, are you?”

Despite his wide popularity, especially around your area, you had never seen the hero before, and seeing spiderman up close was definitely much more intimidating than you thought it would be.

He was clad in his infamous red suit, though his voice was certainly much deeper than you expected it to be. Perhaps even fake? It sounded far too low for any normal human being.

You felt your cheeks heating up in his presence regardless, embarrassed that the celebrated hero found you in such a vulnerable state, and you quickly swatted at your cheeks to rid them of any tear tracks.

“I-” You paused, not knowing if you should bow or courtesy or shake his hand, and you suddenly felt your mouth running dry as you continued to just stare at him, “Mr, um, spiderman? It’s such an honor, oh god, if only my friends were here, oh wow…” You trailed off, rambling as you paced back and forth, heartbeat picking up as you stuttered to a stop.

“No! I’m not um,” You suddenly remembered his original question as you glanced behind you, to the ledge you were sitting on, and gulped, “Not thinking of j-jumping.”

His little eyes narrowed and you took a step back, picking at your nails as you nervously looked back at him, not knowing what you should do.

You watched in silence as he gazed around you, noting the little blankets you had laid out, the pizza box left untouched, the little cupcakes you had made earlier, the laptop whose screen faded to black after some time of no use, and you could almost see the questioning in his spider-eyes.

Peter, in all his glorious honesty, didn’t know why he was here.

From the way it had been going the past couple of weeks, it seemed that you no longer wanted anything to do with him. The arguing had gotten to such a point he genuinely questioned if you could even stand being in the same room as him, let alone spend quality time together.

But he knew you too well, your apartment building too well, and seeing your frame on that rooftop worried a part of him he never knew was there.

Aside from your awkward shuffling, it seemed that you were either nervous from him being here, or just not expecting any company guessing on the layout, but a part of him itched, no, ached to speak with you again, even if it wasn’t on knowing terms.

You, however, half expected him to leave, seeing that his hero duty was out of the way. If you weren’t going to jump, then he’d have no use being here. But he seemed quite intent on staying if his awkward posture said anything about it.

“That’s um, that’s good,” He faltered when he saw you looking at him, quickly glancing somewhere else as he tried to think of logical reasoning behind you being up here.

“Are you havin’ a party up here or something?” He finally asked after a couple of seconds of uncomfortable silence.

You must have had a shockingly surprised look on your face for the little laugh that escaped his lips, and you gave him a small smile, and then a nod.

“Yeah, um, actually,” You rubbed the back of your head as you looked at the pitiful scene, “Can’t say it’s been such a success, though,” You gave a sad snort, kicking some little pebbles aside as you waited for him to respond again.

He began walking around a bit, scooping out the rooftop as he looked over his shoulder, waiting for you to explain.

“What’s the party for?” You watched intently, deciding whether or not to tell the famous hero the truth, but you figured this would be the last you’d be seeing of him, so you shrugged, sitting down near the ledge as you rested your chin on your elbows, peering out into the skyline as you answered.

“My birthday,” You sighed, trying your best to bit back the tears you had so terribly fought against the past hour, “But uh,” You gnawed on your lip from keeping it from wobbling, “Not many people showed up if I’m being honest.”

Unbeknownst to you, since your back was to him, Peter stopped instantly upon your words, heart freezing in his chest as he watched your breathing become a bit ragged.

No, it couldn’t have been today. It had to have been in a couple weeks, it had to be, but as he counted the days down in his head he could only come to one faithful number.

“So,” He clenched his fists, grateful that you couldn’t see him, “Who came?” Please, he prayed, let Gwen have to remember to come.

You took in another shaky breath, really hoping that the masked hero had terrible hearing as you shrugged, quickly wiping at your eyes as you harshly bit your cheek.

“Nobody,” You breathed roughly through your nose, “But it’s okay, actually,” You looked back at him, trying to look your strongest as you pointed to the pizza and cupcakes, “I’ll probably just celebrate with my parents when they come back from their trip.” You felt your voice get quieter and quieter in embracement. Eventually, you just shut up as you let the roar of car honking take over.

For once, he was grateful you didn’t know of his identity. It helped him a bit by looking like less of a dick as he slowly approached you, still formulating the words to make up for his unmasked counterpart.

“Well, they’re all terrible friends, then,” He said carefully, calculating your response.

Even so, he didn’t want to blame her for a mistake that was his fault. He knew he should have taken the blame for the falling out you had a while ago, but his ego was far too big to accept something like that.

So instead, he just brought you down with him, when he knew damn well it wasn’t your fault.

But instead, curse your evergrowing heart, you let out a soft giggle, rubbing your nose to hide the snot as he crouched down a bit further from you.

Never in your wildest dreams would you have guessed you’d be spending your birthday with the spiderman. Even if you were crying your eyes out in front of him, it felt a little better to be with someone than to be alone.

“It’s kinda on my end, if I’m being honest,” You admitted, giving a wet chuckled as you glanced at his mask, gnawing on our bottom lip as you decided if you should tell him the truth.

“Oh?” Peter wanted to know more, who you wanted to blame, but spiderman just had to act curious, and a part of him felt terrible for lying to you like.

In all your years of knowing you, you’ve never done anything to deliberately hurt him. Push him sometimes, sure, but that’s what your friendship was. Cheesy jokes, lame movie jabs, and hours spent struggling over chemistry homework because the teacher just refused to hold any office hours.

“Yeah,” You heaved out another sigh, turning around as you leaned back on the bricks, “I haven’t really been speaking to them, but…” You trailed off, deep in thought. You knew the texts went through, so it was only up to them to ignore it.

You hoped, in a sense, that this would reconcile things between your group. You could count on a singular hand how many times this had happened before, and you really tried your best to use things you knew they liked to get them to ease up a bit.

“It’s no excuse for them not to come. They’re your friends,” He firmly said in his deep voice, and despite his serious tone, you let out another laugh, stopping instantly when you felt as though you were disrespecting him.

His eyes narrowed again, but under his mask, he felt his lips quirk up in a small smile, thankful to have made you laugh somehow, even if it was indirectly caused.

“What?” He questioned, but even then, it might have been the ain you felt or just how tired you were from everything, you chortled again.

“I’m sorry, it’s just that,” You pointed weakly to his mask, “Your voice is a bit, well,” You bit your lip, thinking of the right worm “Distorted.”

Peter grinned, shifting his posting so that he was crossing his knees, facing you as he shrugged, playing with the hem of the blanket as he answered.

“Can’t have ya’ bumping into me on the street and recognizing me by voice, that’s just a hassle for me to clean up,” He really hoped you could tell that he was teasing despite his messed up tone, but your chest rumbled as you let out a stronger laugh, still stuffy from your crying, but still, improvement.

“Threatening to kill an innocent citizen? Surely that can’t look good on your record,” You joked back and he let out an audible sigh of relief.

“Not kill,” His hands bumped your shoe on accident as he situated himself more comfortably on the floor, “There are more ways to make someone quiet.” Peter truly knew none of them.

And just like that, you and Peter fell into your little playful banter, and after he wondered why he felt so full after being so empty these past couple of weeks, and with a solemn, guilty look at you, he knew why.

“Do you want some pizza?” You offered randomly, and almost wanted to bury yourself deep in a pile of sand for even speaking.

“Pizza?” His head turned to the box as if he’d never heard the word before.

“Yeah,” You shrugged, “It’s a bit cold though. But for everything you do for New York, you can have a slice, as long as you promise not to kill me when you see me on the street,” You sent him a little wink and behind the mask, Peter wanted to hide his face in his hands for blushing.

“You sure?” He was hesitant in even asking the question. What would you think if you knew it was him under that mask? Surely you wouldn’t offer the pizza to the Peter you knew.

“Yeah, f'course,” You pushed the box to him, and then your little tupperware of cupcakes as well, “You can have some of these if you’d want, too.”

His hands faltered over the box.

“Really?” It felt wrong eating this food. This had to be crossing some sort of friendship, ex-friends, on the brink, whatever the two of you were, line.

“Take as many as you’d like,” You assured him as you pushed them in his direction, ducking your face in your hands, entirely angeling your back towards him as he stopped his movements.

“What are you doing?” He asked and you felt your brows furrow at the obvious question.

“Giving you privacy, of course,” You responded as if it was the only explanation.

He chuckled, shaking his head as you peaked over at the ground, only for him to be peering back up at you, and you let out a quiet yelp.

The bottom of his mask was lifted up, and you could only see his mouth and the tip of his nose as he waved to you.

“Thankfully you can stare at me all you want, this mask can be detached.” You felt your cheeks warm up at his words, especially now that you could actually hear his real voice.

“You are aware that I now know what you sound like, right?” You tilted your head to the side, and almost laughed when the pizza stopped right at his mouth, and you heard him let out a quiet shit before he went back to eating.

After he was done chewing, and gulped dryly, trying to see if you knew who he really was.

“Guess I’ll just have to take you out now,” He went for a cupcake, noting that it was chocolate, your least favorite flavor, and as he looked at you he wondered why you would have ever made these for your birthday.

“Gonna kill me on my birthday?” You rested your head back, looking up at the cloudy sky as you let out a deep breath, taking into account the sounds of happiness he made when he bit into the sweet.

“Nah,” You peeked at him, seeing the little chocolate crumbs that cornered his lips and smiled, “I told ‘ya; there are more ways than just one.”

You feel your hands balling into fists the more he ate, almost feeling like throwing the laptop at his head if it wasn’t for the damage that would follow in suit.

“Hey, Pete?” You asked, testing out your suspicion the moment you heard him speak.

“Yeah?”

His second cupcake fell from his hand as he slowly looked up, eyes widening as a look of fury overtook your features, standing up quickly as you stalked away, almost running as you tried to get to the stairs.

“H-hey! Wait up! Y/n!” You heard him calling your name, the sound getting closer and closer until a hand wrapped itself around your wrist, gently tugging you back.

You didn’t expect to bump right into his chest, looking up and see his bare face, brown eyes filled with worry, hair falling into his face as he tried to carefully hold you down.

“Getoff me!” You yelled, pushing his hands aside in a weak attempt as you felt new waves of tears rolling in, a new feeling flooding your veins, your brain, your heart as yous tared up a somebody you thought you had never before until tonight.

He’d never told you? Had he told Gwen? Aunt May?Why didn’t he come? This had to be why he’d always show up to class with poorly-covered bruises on his face and say they came from slipping on the stairs. The questions shakily flooded your thoughts as Peter tried his best to stop you from squirming around.

“Y/n, come on, please give me a se-” You stopped, sending him a deathly looking glare as he ducked his head in shame.

“What are you thinking?” You seethed, pushing against his chest as you assessed his uniform, “Spiderman, really? Pete y-you can’t be a hero right now, you’re too young! It’s so dangerous! A-and you have school! A-and May!” You yelled, walking wildly around as you gripped your scalp in defiant anger.

“Y/n…” He followed you around, but you shook your head, pointing a finger into his chest as you tried to wipe at your eyes to hide your weakness from him.

“God, fuck you, Peter! You stop talking to me for weeks and then show up hours after I texted you to come?” He felt his resolve shatter as your lips wobbled.

“Do you hate me? Just say it, please, I-I can’t do this anymore!” You threw your hands up, going back to gnawing on your nails as you paced around, “You always flake on me, but then I see you hanging out with Gwen hours later and I just feel so stupid…” You stopped shaking and he instantly wrapped his arms around your frame, feeling your cheek pressed against his chest as you silently sobbed.

“Why didn’t you come, Pete?” You whispered against his suit.

He didn’t know. He didn’t want to lie to you, not ever, so he stayed silent.

“Do you hate me?” You felt so weak, hands against him, trying to push away but knowing that in the end, you’d never stray far away from the comfort that was him.

“God, no, Y/n,” He quickly shook his head, his hand rubbing a slow hand over your spine, his gloved hands still warm in a sense as he pressed his cheek to the top of your head, “I don’t hate you. I could never hate you,” He said, voice heavy as he felt slow hands wrap themselves around his waist.

“Then why,” You pressed your lips together to stop the quiet sob, “Why didn’t you come?”

He faltered. Before he could stop himself, he felt the truth tumbling out into a spew of words he no longer had control over but had longed to say for so long.

“Because I’m in love with you, Y/n,” He felt you stop under his hands, “I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. A-and I know, I knowI shouldn’t have yelled at you that night but you just scared me so much that I didn’t know what to do. Y-you came in with scratches all over your face and I just forgot about your cat…” He trailed off, pulling away from you as he tried to search your eyes for a reaction, anything to tell him that he wasn’t speaking to a wall.

“You love me?” You whispered back, hands hovering over his as you almost couldn’t believe what he had just said.

Your breathing stopped as he slowly shook his head, not knowing if your question was good or bad.

“I-I well, love is such a broad term that you can’t really kno-”

“I love you too.” You stuttered out, and he stopped at your words, looking down at you as if you had hung the moon and stars and had just spoken the unforbidden words of truth he had only hoped to hear in his dreams.

He stopped, hands working almost like a clockwise motion as they carefully moved up your face, tracing your features as if he had never seen them before.

“Really?”

You nodded, but then glared at him, with no real malice in your eyes.

“Doesn’t excuse you for not coming to my birthday, though.” His hand still traveled up, cupping your cheek as he pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead.

“I know, I promise I’ll make it all up to you this entire month. Anythin’ you ask for darlin’, I’ll give you everything.” It was a promise his confession wouldn’t even need, but he wasn’t lying. He’d give you the entire world if he could.

“You better,” you muttered as he lifted you up to his lips, feeling them fall onto yours as they moved in tangent, almost as if they were meant to be there, and despite being in a spiderman suit, covered in crumbs and pizza sauce, hours late to your party, in a sense, you couldn’t have asked for anything else as a gift.