Time and again, Pixal is placed in a position of watching Zane suffer/die, and trying to save him, even as early as season 3. Their first real bonding moment happens while she’s repairing him. And not long after that, she rescues him from being dropped into a metal shredder. Then in season 4 she helps him get his memory back, and in season 6 she defends him from the Mechanic trying to scrap him for spare parts. And that’s all beforeshe became Samurai X - a role she only took on because Zane had been shut down and was out of commission.
Since becoming Samurai X, she’s had to deal with the aftermath of Zane being presumed dead aboard the destroyed Bounty, his banishment at the hands of Aspheera, and then later the Mechanic abducting him and electrocuting him to near-death.
The long and short of it is, Zane has been through a lot, and whenever something bad happens, Pixal gets front-row tickets to watch it all unfold.
Naturally, this has left an impact on her emotional state. And I think the nightmare she experienced in season 11 (shortly after Zane was banished to the Never Realm) showcases this best:
The nightmare depicts Zane holding onto Pixal for dear life, desperation and fear on his face as she’s the only thing keeping him from falling into the white abyss below. But then, something causes Zane to slip from her grasp, and he falls beyond her reach, with her flailing helplessly, unable to save him.
Again and again Pixal has watched him die. Again and again she has lost him. In her mind, no matter what she does, no matter how hard she tries to protect him or how tightly she holds on, something will happen that will tear Zane away from her again, and she will be powerless to stop it.
It’s not unreasonable to assume that Pixal considers Zane’s safety her own personal responsibility, and blames herself whenever something happens to him. Note in particular the way Zane is characterized in her dream - desperate, afraid, with her as the only thing keeping him from falling into the abyss. And when she fails to hold onto him, she is - quite literally - letting him down.
Now that on its own is enough material to keep my poor Pixal Stan heart beating for months. But there are a few more details I think are worth mentioning.
First - the abyss dream!Zane falls into seems vaguely reminiscent of the ice torrent he falls into at the end of season 3. Here’s a side-by-side comparison for reference:
I know it’s a bit of a stretch, but you gotta admit the similarities are at least a little bit uncanny. If we’re following this train of thought, then this may suggest that Pixal not only feels responsible for her inability to save Zane from Aspheera, but also blames herself for Zane’s death in his battle against the Overlord. Or at the very least, she’s noticed enough similarities between both instances of losing Zane that her mind is subconsciously projecting them.
Either way, it’s safe to say Pixal is almost definitely traumatized from past experiences of watching Zane die. I mean, let’s not forget that Zane’s fight against the Overlord was, as far as we know, her first real experience with death, and Zane didn’t exactly die peacefully.
Another thing to note is that the version of Aspheera in her dreams wasn’t trapped in ice, but rather standing freely and unharmed. On the left is how she appeared in Pixal’s dream, and on the right is what her actual condition was when she banished Zane.
It could just be an inconsequential dream thing, but idk since we’re overanalyzing things here I want to make the comment that it almost erases Zane’s conflict with her - how Zane had fought her (and her entire army) and won, and was only banished due to her breaking her arm out of the ice when he had his back turned. But in Pixal’s dream, that context is removed, with only Aspheera standing there as powerful as can be, blasting Zane seemingly without prompt.
The reason why this is noteable is that the abyss scene and that singular shot of Aspheera are the only two moments in her dream that aren’t exact recordings of the events that transpired. Everything else in her dream is just an exact, near-flawless memory of what happened - exceptfor the abyss scene and the moment when Aspheera blasts Zane. For some reason, Pixal’s dream ignored all of Zane’s involvement in that fight, and disregarded the fact that Zane had already defeated her.
There are two possible meanings of this:
She views Aspheera as an intimidating individual, and the version of Aspheera in her memory reflects Pixal’s feelings about her. She views Aspheera as a strong, formidable, and terrifying opponent. A bogeyman of sorts. Aspheera is Pixal’s bogeyman
Pixal is subconsciously victimizing Zane. And yes, he isa victim in this situation - but just moments before his banishment he hadsuccessfully incapacitated not just Aspheera but all of her soldiers as well. Her dream not only largely neglects to acknowledge his involvement in the fight itself, but his contributions to Aspheera’s defeat - effectively cementing Zane’s victim status further into Pixal’s mind
With all this in mind, I think it’s not unreasonable to say that Pixal, on some unconscious level, views Zane as a victim whose safety she is responsible for. I don’t think she has this viewpoint intentionally, and I think Pixal isaware of Zane’s competence and respects his merits as a teammate, a hero, and a partner. I’m not making the case that Pixal thinks so little of Zane that he can’t stand up for himself.
But I dothink that, after years of watching Zane suffer and having to look after him, her experiences have begun to affect her view on not just Zane, but herself as well - with her subconscious hinting to her in subtle ways that Zane is someone she needs to protect, and that his protection is her responsibility.
In a way, I think Pixal views her responsibility for Zane’s wellbeing in a similar way that Kai views his responsibility for Nya and Lloyd - you know they’re skilled fighters in their own right, and that they can look after themselves, but you will still blame yourself first and foremost if any harm comes to them because you feel like it’s your job to protect them.
Anyway, the long and short of it is that Pixal has a savior complex targeted primarily at Zane, deriving from years of trauma involving his repeated deaths and her repeated inability to save him, and in this essay I will -
Just gonna put the link to this one shot here for no particular reason…
