#privacy my beloved
The chief reason I go for dead Elves in the Halls of Mandos not being able to see events aside from their own life in the tapestries, to not know what’s happening in the world of the living: it genuinely horrifies me. My skin crawls at the thought that all the actions of the living are observed; I feel terrible for the characters seen. I recoil at the thought that my dead relatives could see me in private moments, breaking down or having sex or hiding away to escape the world or crying hopelessly or being hurt or laughing with ecstatic joy in a place alone or a place that I share with one other person and one person only. People have the right to private things and I cringe when that’s taken from them without permission.
And yes, the tapestries that Vaire & co. weave may well just show the highlights of what’s going on in the world outside death, but I’m not sure that’s the common interpretation? Or at least not when the subject is examined in detail as a possible thing? It’s not something I see a lot at least in fic set in Mandos. (Often it feels like increasing the angst of the dead relatives at the expense of the privacy of the ones experiencing life? And idk - it’s obviously a personal thing of mine, but in fic or in meta about a particular character it can feel to me like it’s privileging one character or set of characters over another, and in a way that makes the latter - the characters living and being unknowingly observed - accessories to other characters’ angst or pleasure or character growth. Anyways, I’ve never seen a character react to knowing that others have seenall their life and private moments, moments they might not have shared. They often don’t show up as a character, but are instead scenery, if that makes sense? At most I see them accept the (metaphorical) hug and comfort and not ask why others had the right to see them, nor have I ever read about a character who was watched feel violated (which would be a natural thing to feel, even if for a moment!) And me, imagining myself in this situation. It makes my skin crawl. Someone wanting to hug me for pain that I wouldn’t have shown them had I had the choice that was taken from me - I would shrink away. Especially if that person was someone I had not parted well from in life. Like, someone I’m estranged from doesn’t have that right. Even if it’s not the wish of the person watching, even if it’s not their fault: it’s still a boundary being violated.)
There are other reasons I prefer that the dead in Mandos only see their own life - death as a place of the lack of the new and thus no new knowings, a general preference for reborn people not knowing what’s happened in the intervening years (and thus shock, needing to catch up*, the need to relearn and reknow family and loved ones), death as a place that is fundamentally different from life and thus Mandos as a place where there isn’t new information to learn but rather a place to grapple with you learned and experienced in your own life. Like, I prefer death for the Quendi as nothing more and nothing less than grappling with your past life (this includes not interacting with other elven spirits, which is canonical). But mostly other people seeing the private without permission is horror for me.
Anyways. Never seen this discussed before. Thoughts?
*while I’m in general not terribly interested in Feanor, this is the one area that does fascinate me, a version of him being reborn and not knowing anything that’s happened since his death. A version of him that’s come to a place where he can accept loss and accept that other people have rights too, a version of him that is capable of growing into a better person, a version that’s regained his love and interest in the world - and then he has to confront everything.
