So while doing some pirate research for the play I’m writing I stumbled upon one of the most amazing things I’ve ever read. In the 5th century A.D. there was a Scandinavian princess called Alwilda who’s father tried to set her up to marry Alf, the Prince of Denmark. Alwilda wasn’t cool with this so she and some female companions dressed as men, stole a ship, and sailed away. Eventually they met a company of pirates who were in need of a new captain and they were so captivated by her that they elected her as their new leader. Her crew became so infamous that Prince Alf was sent out to stop them. When their ships met he took Alwilda prisoner and she was so impressed by Alf’s skill that she agreed to marry him after all and eventually became the Queen of Denmark.
I stopped caring whether this was factually accurate about halfway through because it’s completely AWESOME.
Medievalist here for triumphant fact-checking: this story is, if not true, at least true according to the history of the Danes (Gesta Danorum) written in the 12th century by Saxo Grammaticus. You can read his account of Alwilda’s story in the original Latin here, or in English translation here. Highlights include:
She exchanged woman’s for man’s attire, and, no longer the most modest of maidens, began the life of a warlike rover. Enrolling in her service many maidens who were of the same mind, she happened to come to a spot where a band of rovers were lamenting the death of their captain, who had been lost in war; they made her their rover captain.
I love the implication that there were lots of Danish maidens just WAITING for the opportunity of a life of piracy…
so at a used book store a couple months back i found an annotated copy of dracula, and now that dracula daily is a thing, i’ve finally gotten around to reading it.
they have the fuckign. chicken paprika recipe that knocked out our boy johnny.
now you too can upset your mild-mannered stomach so badly that you have fever dreams of a sexy haunted castle
AFULL WEEK of prompts for these bumbling, star-gazing lovers!!
All you have to do to celebrate the event is submit art or fic - and of course, have a love for Terraqua.
The week starts September 15th. We’re working hard on giving you prompts that are open-ended yet focused: fluff or angst, canon or AU, it all depends on how you interpret them. Hang on tight, we’ll announce them soon!!!
alright, there are a lot of email book clubs now, so here’s ALL of them, in one convenient list
NOTE: IF YOU FIND MORE PLEASE SEND !!! put them in the notes, my ask box, dm them to me, just notify me in SOME way and i will edit this base post so they all remain in one place
Tips on Publishing in Tolkien Studies from PCA/ACA
I attended an informal evening session at the Popular Culture Association conference about publishing in Tolkien Studies, and I wanted to share the advice that was given. There were some big names there: journal editors and book publishers who were happy to share what they see come across their desks, as well as scholars and academics with extensive experience publishing in Tolkien Studies.
Know what’s been published. A major reason Tolkien Studies journals turn down submissions is that those submissions are retreading territory that’s already been extensively covered in the scholarship. Journal of Tolkien Research,Mythlore,andMallorn have all or most of their journals online, so they are good places to start in making sure your ideas forge in a new direction.
New scholars in the field do better publishing in journals rather than themed anthologies. Themed anthologies often don’t make it to print for a variety of reasons, but their editors usually expect you to turn in a finished article (because the anthology is often looking for a publisher and needs the articles to show potential publishers … but just like any attempt at publication, there’s no guarantee that a publisher will pick up the anthology). Journals, on the other hand, have a structure in place to publish regularly, so if your article is accepted, it is much more likely to see print.
Read the guidelines for a particular publication and be scrupulous in following them.
I was but a small candle among these luminaries in the Tolkien Studies field, but I will still offer my two cents: Do not think that because you’re “just a fan” that you have nothing to say worthy of publication. I keep a foot in both pools–the scholarly pool and the fandom pool–and fans often discuss ideas that haven’t made it into the scholarship yet. And Tolkien Studies is a field that is very open to contributions from independent scholars (read: fans), in a large part because everyone in Tolkien Studies knows that the field hasn’t been built by academics but by fans.
I am vocal in encouraging fans doing work in the field who want to try publishing that work (and not everyone does, and that’s fine too) to give it a go. For those who want to know what myprocess as an independent scholar has looked like and who have questions or need a nudge before taking the first step, my inbox is always open.
Get a notebook or use a notebook on your phone. Either way it’s important that it’s not just scraps of paper, it’s a bound collection of pages or a dedicated sticky on your phone. This is your document of the world. This is your touchstone with what the hell is happening.
Did you agree to have lunch with friends? Put it in the notebook. Is there an assignment due on Monday? Notebook. Do you have go buy groceries? List in the notebook, if you don’t put your list in the notebook you will forget vegetables but grab three kinds of cookies instead. You need vegetables to live, damn it.
The thing is I’ve found that the notebook doesn’t have to be organized. It doesn’t need neat margins, it won’t look like a bullet journal, and at some point inevitably I will draw a dick in my notebook and it’ll show up while I’m paging through it next to my mom looking for a phone number. What’s really weird (though not really) is that just writing something down frequently means that I won’t have to look it up - I would have forgotten the thing if I hadn’t written it down but having written it down I don’t have to go looking for it because now I remember it. Writing it down made it real.
Writing things down also means lists. Lists are good. Lists are my friends. Here’s a list of reasons that I like lists:
easy to glance at and re-calibrate priorities
hard to get distracted from (short!)
crossing completed items off the list is like a fucking drug it feels so good
whenever someone is like “what are you so freaked out about it’s not like you’re even busy” I have a handy list to point at and say “bullshit, fucker, I’m doing a bunch!”
Usually that bullshit fucker is the voice in my brain, so the lists are a way to ground me and remind me that I am getting shit done and I’m not a huge waste of space
writing lists makes you think about the things - I wrote that I needed veggies which reminded me that I needed eggs which reminded me that easter was last weekend so I should write down that I need to go buy a bunch of discount candy
Writing stuff down can also help you to clarify your feelings about something when your executive dysfunction is messing with you. I like doing pro and con lists because usually by the time I’ve finished writing both columns it’s very clear how I feel about the issue even if I wasn’t sure when I started. I like bouncing ideas off friends and writing to them for advice because answering their questions and articulating my thoughts helps me realize what I was thinking. (especially when I don’t want to do something and I’d much rather give up but writing about it makes me realize that finishing the thing would be better than not finishing).
Writing things down is weirdly magical for me. It’s the reason I made the first project post that has spawned these getting shit done posts - I had a bunch of stuff going on and I needed a list so I could look at it all at once and see what needed more energy or what could chill for a while. Writing stuff helps to will stuff into reality for me.
Part One - Throw a Bunch of Shit at the Wall Part Two - If it’s not Written Down it’s not Real Part Three - Time is a Social Construct but it’ll still Fuck Your Shit Up
Okay so last week I promised a pal that I would talk about how to manage a bunch of projects and get things done when you’ve got issues with executive dysfunction. I’m going to primarily discuss this in terms of ADHD and Depression because those are my wheelhouse, baby.
But here’s a funny thing - I promised that I’d write this up when I got back to a desktop and I’ve had access to a desktop for two days. And I also just decided to write up a serious semi-shitpost about the Civil War and The Simpsons and while I was doing that I got distracted for an hour by skimming through a 500 page report about Ecigarettes and researching popcorn lung because I’m a terrible person and will cite sources to argue with my friends.
Which gets to my first point:
The projects that I end up completing or actually even working on are only about 30% of the projects that I start and maybe 10% of the ideas for projects that I have.
I throw and *unbelievable* amount of shit at the wall so there’s got to be at least a little that sticks.
Here’s an example - in my projects post I mentioned that I was interested in doing a fundraiser, which may actually turn into me creating a small 501C3 group. In the past three years here are the charities I was serious enough about wanting to start that I actually started doing research and paperwork on them:
Rides on Release - a ride service for people just released from the local jail so they can get home safely and not be concerned about reoffending by panhandling to try to get bus fare back to someplace safe.
Some variety of glasses charity - I’m so glad that Zenni post blew up because for like two years I’ve wanted to rope in local opticians and do vision tests for low income students and take donations to pay for glasses then order in bulk from Zenni - thankfully there are good orgs in my area that already do this
Pack/Tuck/Bind - I still want to do this but a way to donate gender affirming structural garments to folks who can’t afford them or can’t be caught purchasing them. Maybe a buy-one-give-one model that also would include an information pack with a list of websites and a book of resources disguised as something innocuous. I’m actually still kind of in a tiny way working on binder and tuckpants designs with some of my friends.
Trans Clothing Exchange - so my plan here was to set up like a consignment store where people could send in clothes in their size and get store credit to spend on other things available OR make the choice to purchase clothes (and these would be used/donated clothes) for a low cost and then the money from the clothing purchases would go toward paying for care packages for people who can’t be seen going out and buying GNC clothing or clothes that would out them or who just straight-up can’t afford it. And like a lot of people have a lot of assigned gender clothing they may want to get rid of for various reasons and this way they could make sure that it would go to someone who would be affirmed by their donation.
And dammit, those are all still good ideas and I want to do them! But right now I have the energy for ONE thing charitywise and that ONE thing at the moment is a fundraiser to help protect voting rights in the leadup to November. So that’s what I’ve gotta focus on. That’s 20% of my big, complicated, just started working on them projects and it’s still not really off the ground. But it will get there.
So what I’m saying here is that having tons of ideas is a good thing, hopefully you’ll have enough time and freedom to come back to your good ideas and still find them beautiful and applicable down the line.
But you can’t do them all at once so write down your good ideas and work on the ones that are most important, then work on the ones that are the farthest along. I’ve done a tiny bit of work for one of those four ideas above, I’ve done more work for my fundraiser, so it’s the fundraiser that gets the focus. I can come back to the gender affirming clothes next, when I’m done with one charity project.
And I just realized that if I keep going this way this is going to be one of the longest posts I’ve ever written and coming from me that is saying something so I’m going to break this into chunks.
Part One - Throw a Bunch of Shit at the Wall Part Two - If it’s not Written Down it’s not Real
Hey remember a couple weeks ago when i was writing these? I forgot for a while. But I had written down the next two that I wanted to write so now I’m getting back to it, which I think is pretty solid proof-of-concept for this shit working.
Anyway, now we’re going to talk about how perfection is your enemy. You hate perfection. Perfection is not wanted here. Perfection is what scares your ND brain and makes you not want to start something because fuck it, it’ll just be fucked up anyway so you might as well not even try.
WRONG MOTHERFUCKERS.
Well, you’re not wrong, that’s what your brain is telling you and I get that. What’s wrong is that nothing is perfect and you don’t have to feel the pressure to be perfect because everything is fucked up but you’re dealing with shit that makes that hard to see.
This is such a fucking truism that I can think of three phrases off the top of my head that communicate it:
Perfect is the enemy of good.
It doesn’t have to be perfect, it just has to be done.
and
Fuck it, ship it.
Fuck it, ship it isn’t some bullshit “engineers are perfectionists” joke, it’s a fuckin philosophy, man.
Actually here’s another way that people say this (taken from Dune, do you want to talk to me about Dunebecause oh boy will I talk to you about Dune):
Arrakis teaches the attitude of the knife - chopping off what’s incomplete and saying: ‘Now, it’s complete because it’s ended here.’
No project that you or anyone else ever works on is going to be perfect. You’re never going to feel satisfied that you’ve done all that you could, that it’s as pure and whole and clean as you want it to be. There’s always going to be another bit of shiny stuff to polish or rough stuff to file or cables that could be better organized or transitional phrases that could be cleaner.
Fuck it, ship it. Hand in the paper, box up the art project. Now it’s complete because it’s ended here.
And that’s why everything that you do, that you make, that you could put into the world is worth it and your brain is a filthy liar.
Perfect is bullshit. Hell, “good enough” is bullshit to a certain extent.
“I’m not going to write that story because it won’t be (any good/perfect/good enough)”
“Why bother, it’s not like I’m [good enough/skilled enough/any good] so I shouldn’t even try, I’ll just leave it to the people who are better at it than me.”
Nope.
The thing you make will be good enough. The thing you make will be perfect if only for the simple reason that something exists that didn’t exist before.
And it doesn’t matter if that’s an algebra homework assignment or a painting or just a meal for yourself. You made the thing. You did the thing. It happened because you did it and having any little bit of it, no matter how flawed or burnt on the edges or incomplete, is better than having none of it.
Fuck it, ship it. Two algebra problems out of fifteen is better than none. A peanut butter sandwich for dinner instead of chicken and veggies is still better than nothing. Two chords repeating instead of a more complicated progression is more music than the silence was.
This also applies to cleaning your house, by the way. Putting laundry in the hamper but forgetting to start the washer is better than having laundry on the floor. Cleaning the toilet but forgetting the bathtub is better than leaving both dirty.
And it doesn’t have to be polished and filed and refined before you show it to the world or walk away from it. It’s complete because it’s ended here.
Part One - Throw a Bunch of Shit at the Wall Part Two - If it’s not Written Down it’s not Real Part Three - Time is a Social Construct but it’ll still Fuck Your Shit Up Part Four - Something is better than nothing so done is better than perfect Part Five - Do the least you can do
A big, fuck-off bucket (4 gallon, get food service buckets because a gardening bucket or some shit will make your coffee taste weird). Must be cylindrical. Get one with a lid if possible. If there’s no lid you’ll need saran wrap.
Some variety of round mesh screen (must fit the inside diameter of your bucket, so your bucket can’t taper at the bottom) (you may need to actually make this custom - look for kitchen sifters)
Big, fuck-off coffee filters - food service size, have to be at least as big as the inside diameter of your bucket when you flatten the filter out.
You will also need:
A shitload of whole coffee beans (use something you like; roast doesn’t particularly matter - you can use chocolate raspberry coffee beans or satan’s anus caffeine killer or fuckin starbucks for all I care, this is YOUR three gallons of coffee concentrate, it should taste good to you)
Three gallons of filtered water
A fridge big enough to fit your bucket OR a CLEAN trash can full of ice that will fit your bucket. NOT A FREEZER. YOU DON’T WANT TO WASTE THIS MUCH FUCKIN COFFEE BY FREEZING IT INTO A THIRTY POUND CHUNK OF DISAPPOINTMENT
A cheap one-gallon pitcher. You need one with a spout and a large opening at the top, not like the storage pitchers. Something like this but if you pay more than three dollars for it I will start manifesting in your house physically. Go to the 99cent store, they’ll have one.
Something store your coffee. I recommend these. You’ll need 4 for this much concentrate. If you make coffee concentrate a lot these will stain like a motherfucker. Accept it.
Rubber bands and regular size coffee filters.
Let’s get started.
1. Coarsely grind 5 pounds of room temperature coffee beans. (Again, please don’t die)
2. Put your ground coffee at the bottom of the bucket.
3. Gently pour your three gallons of filtered water into the bucket.
4. Once the bucket is full flatten out a paper filter and lay it over the top, where the ground coffee should be floating. *GENTLY* pat the filter over the surface until it’s covering the top and uniformly damp.
5. Cover the bucket with the lid or saran wrap and stick it someplace cold for about 18 hours. (Minimum 16, max 24)
6. After its had its time to chill make sure your arms are *really fuckin clean* or put on the livestock gloves. Settle the screen on top of the coffee filter in the bucket.
7. SLOWLY press down on the screen and, keeping it as flat and even as possible, push it down to the bottom of the bucket. Try as much as you can to keep coffee grounds from getting around the filter and the screen.
8. Put a regular size coffee filter over the mouth of each of your storage containers, fold the filters over the lip and rubber band them in place.
9. Pour a portion your coffee concentrate into your wide-mouth pitcher, again trying not to stir up or pour in coffee grounds (you can use something like a large measuring cup as a ladle if you wanna be really careful about it but pouring should work, you’re going to filter again but it’ll be faster if you don’t get grounds mixed in). You’ll have to fill this pitcher multiple times.
10. Fill your storage pitchers by slowly pouring the concentrate through the filters on top. Once your pitchers are full remove the filters and close the pitchers.
You now have a fuckton of coffee concentrate. It’ll last in the fridge for about two weeks.
Serving suggestion: Use one cup of concentrate and three cups of water to make a nice, smooth, highly caffeinated summer beverage.
Serving warning: You CAN drink this straight, if you want. Try it out in small doses before you have a liter of it and die.
(Play with the water and concentrate levels to figure out what ratio works best for your needs; I tend to go 1:1 but I have a tolerance like you wouldn’t believe. My sister goes 1:5 and it still tastes mostly like coffee)
Now, you may be looking at this unholy amount of coffee concentrate and realizing that you brewed three gallons but that it actually *serves* something like twelve gallons.
Can you drink twelve gallons of coffee in two weeks? Probably not. At least I wouldn’t recommend it. Actually, please don’t.
FREEZE THAT SHIT INSTEAD.
It’ll last essentially forever in the freezer. You can freeze it in bottles OR you can freeze it in cubes. If you freeze cubes here are some probably bad ideas:
Put cubes of coffee concentrate into iced coffee so it gets stronger as it warms up.
BLEND THAT SHIT INTO A FUCKIN SMOOTHIE. YOGURT, PEANUT BUTTER, FROZEN BANANAS, COFFEE CONCENTRATE CUBES, AND A CHOCOLATE DRIZZLE, BE A JUMPY FUCKIN MONKEY
Lov the cronch and just eat coffee cubes
Pour. Alcohol. Over. It. (actually really nice with a white russian or kaluha or malibu rum or amaretto. You’re gonna have the worst fuckin hangover, good luck)
Anyway. That’s how to make a frankly irresponsible amount of coffee.
She’s working at the hospital since Rhona came to town,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to town,
Hide away, hide away, she’s come to take us down.
Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep 6 feet away,
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay,
Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.
But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today,
And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say,
Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away,
Hide away, hide away, she took us down today.
[Image ID: Tumblr user @neanderthyall says in the notes, “I thought that 6 feet was kind of a double meaning. Like six feet away to stop the spread, but when people die they’re six feet underground, and its six feet of the dirt that keeps you apart. Like ‘Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts Hide away, hide away, or the six feet will be dirt’.” End ID.]
HI DON’T LEAVE THIS IN THE NOTES THAT’S ACTUALLY BRILLIANT
I’ve taken the liberty of expanding the lyrics slightly and coming up with a tune:
Daddy’s at the food store, Mummy’s out of town, She’s working at the hospital since Rhona came to town, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to town, Hide away, hide away, she’s come to take us down.
Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep 6 feet away, But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her some today, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay, Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.
I need to see the sunlight, I’ve not been out in days And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say, Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away, Hide away, hide away, she took us down today
The days all run together, I haven’t changed my shirt We may be getting restless, but keep on the alert Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts Hide away, hide away, or the six feet will be dirt
@billpottsismygf’s extended version. A beautiful singing voice ☺️
As planned I’ve extended this even further and re-recorded it with the new lyrics and a guitar part; it’s also a bit better quality. It’s so cool that so many different versions of this song have sprung up already! I recommend having a scroll through them all on @jus-tea‘s tumblr.
(Em)Daddy’s at the (B7)food store, (Em)Mummy’s out of (B7)town, She’s (Em)working at the (B7)hospital since (Em)Rhona (B7)came to (Em)town, (Am)Hide away, hide away, Miss (Em)Rhona’s come to town, (Am)Hide away, (Em)hide away, she’s come to (B7)take us (Em)down.
Miss Rhona’s at the doorstep, I’ll keep six feet away, But Grandma needs the paper, I’ll take her one today, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s come to stay, Hide away, hide away, we can’t come out to play.
I’m missing all my friends, though we keep in touch by phone, I’m learning what it is to truly be alone, Hide away, hide away, even though you moan, Hide away, hide away, or we’ll be lying prone.
My love she says she misses the twinkle of my eyes, But Rhona stalks the streets and to meet would be unwise, Hide away, hide away, we hear the desperate cries, Hide away, hide away, or see the bodies rise.
I feel myself a-coughin’, I haven’t got a mask, It’s work or die for me, though, so who am I to ask, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s on the task, Hide away, hide away, she’s come for me at last.
I need to see the sunlight, I’ve not been out in days, And here’s a note from Rhona, she wanted me to say, Hide away, hide away, keep 6 feet away, Hide away, hide away, she took us down today.
The days all run together, I haven’t changed my shirt, We may be getting restless, but keep on the alert, Hide away, hide away, Miss Rhona’s quite the flirt, Hide away, hide away, her touch is not inert.
Hide away, hide away, even though it hurts, Hide away, hide away, or six feet will be dirt.
