#science is unclear how that happened

14/11/2020 A Barred Owl has been making Confused Sex Hoots. In the middle of the day. In November, which is the least sexy month for Barred Owls. We found this Mystery Lump in the forest, looking like a lopsided glob of molten marshmallow about to fall off the skewer. Can’t be sure at this distance, but I suspect the Mystery Lump is the source of the Confused Sex Hoots.

Consider the Arctic Terns. They live in a world of brightness, crossing the globe twice a year to live on the gleaming ice under the nightless skies of both the Arctic and Antarctic summers. Winter does not know them, and they nod vaguely and politely when you speak to them of night.

Consider the Bar-headed Geese, who have been migrating across the Himalayas since before the Himalayas existed. Their blood is strange with mutant hemoglobin. They cross in a single night, in dark and bitter cold, so the air above the mountains thickens enough to hold them. 

And then there’s these guys. Scientists have captured, banded, released, and recaptured a couple hundred Barred Owls; none was further than ten kilometers from its starting point. They are the laziest bird.