#tentacle-esque hair
So if there’s a Chuck Tingle in the Ted Lasso Universe, do you think he’s ever written a book starring a handsome coach named Red Glasso who gets railed by his own sentient mustache?
#so you finally made this post huh
#now do one the fictional Chuck Tingle would write for each member of the team
#if the Ted Lasso universe doesn’t have a chuck tingle. i hope Higgins writes them
(tags courtesy of @oasis-wasteland)
New headcanon: Higgins is the Ted Lasso equivalent of Chuck Tingle.
#and yes he totally writes ‘Red’ getting railed#Julie Higgins proofreads (via@kalinara)
Lindsay Higgins, addressing his pre-teen youth club on the subject of Honour Your Father And Your Mother: ‘Charlie I don’t care how embarrassing yourparents are: I’ve read the entirety of my parents’ manuscripts for the Red Glasso series, including enough shower scenes that mean I will never be able to look a single member of the Richmond football team in the eye again. If I can get through that, you can get through your dad’s embarrassing singing at family barbeques.’
I’d also like to propose that if Higgins writes a book for each member of the team, the Richmond boys are very, very happy about this and all make sure they get advanced copies and compare notes on whose book is best rated on GoodReads or whatever.
It’s all in good fun, except when Roy finds out about the book starring Troy Rent, a gruff yet brooding coach whose ongoing physical therapy for a bashed knee ends up having him in a variety of interesting positions with a suspiciously-named Jamie Pie (Higgins was quite proud of that one) and does not take it well. Everyone has to hide their copy and pretend like hell that they haven’t read this one, no, honest Roy, we haven’t…
(Colin is disproportionately excited about his book coming out but then fumes for a week when his character is made Scottish. Isaac will not stop laughing about it.)
