Hi everyone! Here is episode 5 and 6 (aka the clusterfuck episode and the great wilderness adventure episode) of the D/s analysis series by myself and @lutawolf, her Part 2 here. Thank you for all the lovely comments and shared thoughts so far!
Okay so Porsche-as-sub at the start of episode 5 makes my heart hurt. The night before he placed himself in someone else’s hands completely, probably for the first time ever, probably in a way he didn’t even know he was capable of. And that morning his Dom is closed off and distant – like he’s disappointed. Like after giving Kinn everything, Kinn’s decided he wasn’t good enough. That’s devastating for a sub, let alone one operating on such an instinctive intuitive level as Porsche is right now, where he can’t mentally reason himself out of the feelings of unwanted-ness and rejection.
(Kinn’s not in a great place either, but Luta’s going to talk about how much he’s messing up. Suffice to say that Kinn probably feels he’s massively overstepped; as a man, as a boss, and as a Dom, and doesn’t know how to connect or comfort Porsche beyond tersely asking if he’s okay a few times. And because Porsche is a hopeless romantic at heart, that’s way below what he needs for the night after his first time.)
Noooooo, Kinn, no, why would you say this? For a sub this is devastating, especially because it’s unfair! Sometimes as a sub you do fail at something and you’re not sure why, but in those instances it’s the responsibility of the Dom to explain and correct and respond appropriately.Once again I’m leaving to Luta to talk about why this is a Bad Dom moment, but poor Porsche has a maelstrom of hurt feelings and righteous indignation mixed with longing and lust inside him right now, which is what gives us that turbulent bathroom-lighter scene. Having Ken and Big perform the punishment is also extra damaging, because it adds another level of distance between him and Kinn; a punishment from Kinn’s hand could have reaffirmed the connection and attention even if it was still unjust.
More heartbreak (I told you this was the clusterfuck episode right?). Porsche is still trying to be a good sub asking permission to go out, because he knows deep-down how much Kinn’s attention is worth, that to be chosenby Kinn would be validation like nothing else. So Kinn’s dismissive do what you want is a horrible response to get – it would feel like Kinn’s basically tossed him aside. Now there’s a whole range of ways a bratty sub could respond to that feeling, but you could broadly group them into:
Go into hyperdrive trying to re-attract their Dom’s attention
Become very inward-focused and withdrawn and sad
Act out (aka uber brat)
And what does Porsche do?
Try and sleep with a random bar lady
Mope around the bar with sad face on
Accept a bike ride from Vegas back to the mansion
As a fellow bratty sub I personally feel these are rather restrained responses as I would have gone absolutely feral if a Dom I was loyal to tossed me aside in such a way, so top marks to Porsche for holding back. And for not punching Kinn in the face when he yells at him and demotes him to a lower bodyguard position later on. Because this is Porsche at the end of his brat rope, actually crossing over into a more aggressive dominant style because of Kinn’s mixed signals and casual cruelty.
And so he does the right thing. He leaves. He puts distance between him and the bad Dom who’s making him feel shit about himself. I’m stressing this point just because I know there’s a few people interested-in-but-lacking-experience-in-D/s reading these posts and I want to be clear that this was a good, healthy thing for Porsche to do.
Disclaimer: This blog does not advocate the use of get-along handcuffs irl, but god are they effective in BL
The Great Wilderness Adventure aka episode 6 is lovely and healing, both for their general relationship but also from a D/s perspective. Porsche starts off still in brat-on-the-brink mode, being challenging and aggressive towards Kinn (justified. Kinn’s clearly never set foot in the countryside in his life). But once they find water and hope then they start settling back into their usual dynamic, their bonds only intensifying by the sharing and communication. Giant paragraphs of text kill my soul so here you can have another list
A few of Porsche’s physical moments of submission
Splashing the cool water over Kinn’s neck
Waiting by his side to eat; letting Kinn hand him the food
Making Kinn more comfortable when he sleeps
A few of Porsche’s verbal moments of brattiness
Er pretty much just the constant, constant teasing
(the teasing goes a bit too far but as Luta says, Porsche is still acting out a bit because Kinn damaged the D/s trust between them last episode, so Kinn is indulging his brattiness more than he normally would to help them regain equilibrium)
If you’re thinking, iffy all that submission stuff just sounds like caring not kinky bdsm, well, yes. That’s because submission isa form of caring (as is being a Dom) albeit within a power exchange structure. But they are lovely little symbols of Porsche’s continuing devotion to Kinn’s well-being, in the same way that Kinn is devoted to Porsche’s protection in a wider more over-arching sense*. And all these moments of Porsche’s care lead up beautifully to the symbolism of Porsche’s offer to cut off his hand to save Kinn’s life – and of equal importance, Kinn’s refusal, and then him letting Porsche go. They each give the other their life back. Both of those moments showing the other how much they matter, and that they are cared for and trusted, which is the heart of any D/s relationship, which takes us from this:
To this:
And sets us up perfectly for the joy that is the side story!
*If you’re reading this post episode 9, don’t @ me
Rest of the D/s series
Introduction to Porsche as a bratty submissive here
