#the first matter

A lot of men in the books I read
are supposedly still alive.
I wonder if they’re still afraid.

Right now, in the school library,
holding my place in a book
on The Secret Art of Alchemy,
nobody’s raping me. Superb!

The book says if you achieved
THE TRIPLE CROWN OF ENLIGHTENMENT
then you were inducted into
THE BROTHERHOOD OF LIGHT,
which means you are still alive today.

Maybe you’re in this library with Ally and me.
Maybe you’re standing outside it. Either way,
you’re experiencing your crown. Do I hate you?

The most divine secrets
were never written down.

For instance, the Druids were,
I’m pretty sure, wizards,
and this alchemical stuff’s the same—
we used to keep what was precious private.

That’s how it ought to be:
that our secrets light us up,
that we spit the rest out.

____________
____________
____________

Soon!
Someday, so soon,
I will do it.

I’ll say your name out loud.

Chessy Normile, Great Exodus, Great Wall, Great Party (Copper Canyon Press, 2020)