#time for crab

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time for crab

today i summoned 104 crabs and they all fell in love with me. i love them too.

time for crab

today i summoned 2,042 crabs! i caught 23 of them. i became friends with 39 of them. 10 fell in love with me

(this isnt counting the other time i refreshed though. I loved like 80 in that one lol)

group picture!!!

this is literally my favorite tumblr april fools ever omg. the crabs are my bros i love them so much

time for crab

today i summoned 666 crabs! i caught 17 of them. i became friends with 166 of them. 394 fell in love with me

group picture!!!

time for crab

today i summoned 666 crabs! i caught 621 of them. i became friends with 7 of them.

group picture!!!

time for crab

today i summoned 218 crabs! one fell in love with me

group picture!!!

time for crab

today i summoned 557 crabs and caught 14 of them. look at them all!

time for crab

today i summoned 10 crabs! i caught 6 of them. i became friends with one of them.

group picture!!!

dagny-hashtaggart:

andmaybegayer:

Estimates say there’s under 20 million Tumblr users and we summoned 25 million crabs. A crab in every heart…

As pleasing an idea as it is, I can’t help but feel that we’ve been burned in the past by cases concerning statistical representativeness and arthropods

crab redistribution under crabbunism

Estimates say there’s under 20 million Tumblr users and we summoned 25 million crabs. A crab in every heart…

staff:

OFFICIAL TUMBLR PRESS RELEASE

For Hellsite Eyes only…,

Hello again, Tumblr. Now that our dashboards are back to normal (‘normal’ doing some heavy lifting here), the crabs are back in tropical paradise (for now), and Mr. Brick Whartley is back with them, we felt it was time for reflection.

In his opening statement on April 1, Mr. Whartley, our now-former Head of Viral Marketing and Exponential Growth and Front End Software Developer, outlined his ambition to “…increase clicks across the platform by any means necessary”. Quite the lofty ambition. And this got us thinking—how did we do? And by we, of course, we mean you. Well, you didn’t disappoint, and if you like unnecessarily large numbers, you’re in for a real treat.

  • By 12:49 pm (PDT)/3:49 pm (EDT), the community had summoned 7.5 million crabs at a rate of 1.07 million crabs per hour. 
  • By the end of the day, there were 20,000 posts by 14,000 of you with the tag “time for crab.” Time indeed.
  • The community’s April Fools prank was a resounding success, with more than 52,000 posts from Tumblr users attempting to “crash” this Hellsite by scheduling posts all at the same time. 
  • Mr. Brick Wharley’s blog accumulated more than 3,000 followers and 12,000 notes, while @staff received nearly 50,000 notes across the day.
  • Perhaps Mr. Whartley didn’t do such a lousy job. Finally, the most important statistic of the day, the community summoned25millioncrabs across Tumblr on April 1, 2022.

Credit where credit’s due, folks. You did us proud, you did Mr. Whartley proud, and most importantly, you did yourselves proud. So give those index fingers a little rest—they deserve it. And you will need all your strength for April 1, 2023.

time for crab

And so, due to an unfortunate lapse in judgment that led to me refreshing my large Crab Refinery out of existence we end today’s journey on a modest sum of 50 Crab. A very good turnout for a hard day’s work, all things considered.

As of starting this post, i summoned 51 crabs! i caught 3 of them. i became friends with 5 of them.

group picture!!!

witchysolfan:

garbage-empress:

kalybaly:

bishopinblue:

bishopinblue:

I just found out there is a crab that looks like a pancake and now the world seems brighter.

I’m actually gonna cry over these crabs…..

In case anyone was curious what they looked like!

Thought these were completely made up but apparently they’re probably juvenile Atergatis integerrimus crabs or a related species. Also most members of Atergatisare toxic because of symbiotic bacteria that produce a tetrodotoxin-like poison. Tetrodotoxin is the reason that improperly prepared pufferfish will kill you. These are deadly pancakes.

The forbidden pancakes

It seems that the biggest April fools joke this year was actually on the phone app users who had no crabs

Do You Love The Color Of The Crab?

today i summoned 2,511 crabs! i caught 57 of them. i became friends with 19 of them. 5 fell in love with me

group picture!!!

time for crab

You bet your ass I’m gonna post crab count

time for crab

today i summoned a crab! it is a good day

thot-sauce-returns:

thot-sauce-returns:

thot-sauce-returns:

thot-sauce-returns:

I have to take a picture of this the old fashioned way because I crashed my desktop with this script

Girl help I summoned too many crabs

Turns out this April, im the fool

Hmm

staff:

OFFICIAL TUMBLR PRESS RELEASE

For Hellsite Eyes only…,

Hello again, Tumblr. Now that our dashboards are back to normal (‘normal’ doing some heavy lifting here), the crabs are back in tropical paradise (for now), and Mr. Brick Whartley is back with them, we felt it was time for reflection.

In his opening statement on April 1, Mr. Whartley, our now-former Head of Viral Marketing and Exponential Growth and Front End Software Developer, outlined his ambition to “…increase clicks across the platform by any means necessary”. Quite the lofty ambition. And this got us thinking—how did we do? And by we, of course, we mean you. Well, you didn’t disappoint, and if you like unnecessarily large numbers, you’re in for a real treat.

  • By 12:49 pm (PDT)/3:49 pm (EDT), the community had summoned 7.5 million crabs at a rate of 1.07 million crabs per hour. 
  • By the end of the day, there were 20,000 posts by 14,000 of you with the tag “time for crab.” Time indeed.
  • The community’s April Fools prank was a resounding success, with more than 52,000 posts from Tumblr users attempting to “crash” this Hellsite by scheduling posts all at the same time. 
  • Mr. Brick Wharley’s blog accumulated more than 3,000 followers and 12,000 notes, while @staff received nearly 50,000 notes across the day.
  • Perhaps Mr. Whartley didn’t do such a lousy job. Finally, the most important statistic of the day, the community summoned25millioncrabs across Tumblr on April 1, 2022.

Credit where credit’s due, folks. You did us proud, you did Mr. Whartley proud, and most importantly, you did yourselves proud. So give those index fingers a little rest—they deserve it. And you will need all your strength for April 1, 2023.

time for crab

today i summoned 30 crabs and caught 28 of them. look at them all!

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