Please, the Zweihänder is a specialist weapon for breaking pike formations. Are your coworkers in a pike formation? Are they blocking your advance with a wall of thorny death? No? Then what the hell is a Zweihänder gonna do?
Really wanna fuck up your coworkers? Halberd from the elevator. Polearms have the range you need. Doors open, skewer Steve from accounting, doors close. Ride it back down, doors open, skewer Laura at the front desk. Back up, open doors, stab Jason, repeat. They call security? You’ve got feet of range on that motherfucker. Dinky little baton ain’t shit next to a Halberd. I’ve pulled the old elevator Halberd at five, six of my jobs over the years and they never see it coming. Until it’s too late, that is. Just a little tip for ya. Keep the change.
Please do note that halberds, because of their asymmetric weight distribution, will be most effective in workplaces with open office plans where there’s room to wind up again after a chop. If your workplace is dominated by narrow hallways, you may find the glaive more effective due to its superior maneuverability.
