#what a ride

LIVE

madamezuki:

aqueerkettleofish:

death2america:

This feels like the start to a horror movie and I love it

From his viewpoint– suddenly this woman he’s been sending pictures of his junk goes from “hey, let’s meet up” to “Hello Brian Smith of 1214 Idyllic Terrace. Does your wife Rose know you’re here? How about your mother?”

He panics and blocks her. He’s sponging off of his wife, and if he gets busted, there goes his gravy train.

And then the woman shows up. In his house. She just got a job working with his wife, who absolutely adores her, and brought her home for dinner. And she’s doing that movie maniac thing where the entire conversation is about Brian, but Rose is clueless and whenever Rose isn’t looking she’s got cold eyes on him.

He tries to stay calm, and act like everything’s normal, and he gets up to get a beer or something and when he turns around from the fridge, Patty is standing there.

“Unlock your phone and give it to me right now.”

“I’m not–”

“Right. Now.”

She installs something on it and hands it back.

“I’ll be in touch. Don’t try to change phones.”

He tries to convince his wife not to be friends with her, even tries the “I think she was coming on to me” line, to which the wife is “Oh, that was definitely in your head. Marge is a lesbian.”

And she just gets progressively scarier throughout the film. He gives her a small payoff. She wants more. She leaves a package for Rose on the front door, but conveniently he gets there first and opens it to find printouts of screenshots. More clues get left behind. He’s only able to keep her from finding out through a combination of sheer luck and her gullibility in believing every explanation he comes up with for his odd behavior. Finally he dips into the secret account he’s been using to hide money he’s been stealing from his wife, and it’s a HUGE payout, but she wants MORE.

And then he comes home to find Marge sitting cheerfully next to Rose’s dead body. And Marge is like “Man, the police always start looking at the husband, and they’re going to find a whole bunch of stuff when they look through your texts. You’ve been promising this woman you’re going to leave your wife. You’ve been sending her money. Oh, she’s a catfish from an untraceable IP, and your wife was talking to the bank JUST THIS AFTERNOON about some odd transactions. You panicked and killed her, and you’ve got NO evidence otherwise. I bet you could be on a flight to a non-extradition country before they find the body, though.”

He runs out the door. Marge starts laughing.

Rose joins in.

They kiss.

As the credits roll, you see the events from Rose’s point of view– having drinks with the new girl from work, with whom she’s getting along amazingly, and Marge’s phone goes off. “God, it’s this asshole from Tinder. He keeps sending me dick pics. Sooner or later they’re going to learn. It’s not even a nice dick. LOOK AT THIS. Who finds that attractive???”

“I… used to? Holy fuck, that’s my husband. ”

and the hatching of the plan, to just keep fucking with him, up to “Okay, so, I’m gonna leave it on the doorstep. Make sure you’re a few minutes late, HE has to find it”

“Oh, god, he tried to tell me it was the mailman. At 8:30. It was so pathetic.”

“WHERE DID HE GET TEN THOUSAND DOLLARS FROM? I’m paying off his goddamn college loans!”

Rose reporting to the police that her husband has been embezzling money from her disabled mother’s trust fund.

The police catching him in the airport. He’s smart enough to say nothing without his lawyer present, and by the time he knows what’s going on, he’s realizes exactly how fucked he is.

The trailer is a slowed down horror version of the Piña Colada Song.

thanksveryga:

teethworm:

prancingtrashcan:

thejadedkiwano:

Let’s play a game.
Type the following words into your tags box, then post the first automatic tag that comes up.
you, also, what, when, why, how, look, because, never

oh comE ON

spies and gardening. sounds about right lmao

maxxayz:

were-ralph:

angstycatthatlikestea:

katlikethesword:

triflesandparsnips:

systlin:

sodomymcscurvylegs:

wereralph:

ruimtetijd:

graceiscringylmao:

wereralph:

smegbertmarbles:

the-peculiar-bi-tch:

midnight-spectrum-again:

sovereignant:

midnight-spectrum-again:

sovereignant:

midnight-spectrum-again:

carthages-finest:

wintre-daemon-berserker:

midnight-spectrum-again:

4me2gay0:

baconis42:

spookous:

self-loathsome:

spookous:

wereralph:

pocketdictator:

narutoskneecaps:

thelimeadecat:

eyajii:

wereralph:

bananapeelchunk:

wereralph:

rattmice:

greylilacs:

omigawdmatt:

kidzbopdeathgrips:

wereralph:

plutoniumbombs:

wereralph:

angelgurlhearts-2:

wereralph:

smatter:

wereralph:

after my werewolf boyfriend pulls out

your WHAT

My

Werewolf Boyfriend

I’m sorry, am I reading that right??

MY

So we’re just gonna ignore the watermelon getting crushed?

Watermelon

Hey so does anyone have the nsfw version for that werewolf pic just asking

I’m sorry what

i know im op this thread has absolutely gotten out of control

hold on op, aren’t you the person who had an iq of 4?

I’m crying. Nobody’s clearing anything up, they just deflect onto the next plot twist

WHAT IS HAPPENING??????

OP’S THE GUY FROM THE HORNY IHOP WAITER POST

THE HORNY WHAT?????

Since we’re just listing them off my favorite Wereralph post is the poptart pussy one

THE WHAT?!

THIS ONE

I am so fucking concerned for the mental health of 95% of the people on this hellsite

personally i’m at 96%

This post keeps getting worse

I often find myself wondering how this website is so utterly incapable of making money, and then I see posts like this and I am violently given my answer.

For the love of god, stop asking “the what?” that’s how this continues!

But what about the thirty for Minotaur?

Ahem.

The what?

No. Canceled.

But why???

I

Just

What the fuck do I do with this information now

GUYS stop reblogging this. OP was in the Marine Core and is technically a war criminal. He turned a blind eye when his comrades killed innocent civilians in Baghdad. He refused testify against soldiers who committed atrocities towards civilians. Stop reblogging OPs posts because that takes attention away from what OP is trying to hide.

You sure that’s me?

image

Like are you sure that’s me??

I’M- THATS ADAM DRIVER

Why on God’s green Earth would you expose your goddamn face wereralph. Do I even want to know why your name is wereralph? Don’t answer that.

its because i like werewolves and my real name is ralph, it’s just that simple. not everything has a crazy explanation

Me every time wereralph posts

People paid Actual Money for this website

The Wolf Master (nsfw)

The end of an era

i miss wereralph :(

pussy so fat staff had to ban me twice

can you imagine Kang Yohan having to literally learn how to be so charismatic though

we see him as a child and no one liked him even before he killed a bird with a cleaver (why did he have that with him???). he clearly knew how to manipulate people but he was still a social leper. when we see him at the church before the fire, he clearly doesn’t fit in and isn’t attempting to do so. he’s not even inside or dressed well.

yet by the time the current timeline starts he has all the people there that day convinced that he fits in and is on their side. can you imagine the fucking learning curve he must have drug himself through?

justplainwhump:

Mark and Gemma get a pet - p XVII (the final part)

Tag list: @painful-pooch@for-the-love-of-nsfwhump@abitefullofwhump@whumpinggrounds

This is it. The final part. I’m emotional. I hope you will be too. Thanks for all the support, and to everyone who was with me during this ride.

Cw for BBU, pet whump, dehumanisation (whumpee partly referred to as ‘it’), referenced BBU-typical dubcon/noncon

[Masterpost] [Part I] [< Previous]

“Ms Gemma? Ms Gemma, I’m sorry, please? Let me out?”

Gemma heard faint taps against the bathroom door. It was odd how the pet was soft and quiet, even in despair. Gemma knew she was desperate. 

No. Not ‘she’. It. It, the pet. Ira wasn’t a person, Ira was a discarded toy, and Gemma had needed her - no, it - for a while. 

She didn’t any longer. 

It hurt a little, admittedly. She’d allowed the pet to grow close to her, to become a part of her life. She felt good when the pet smiled at her, felt safe in its arms, comforted by its love.  She’d lost herself in its touch. 

More than herself.

She’d lost control. 

Of Mark, of her own emotions, of her life.

She’d be getting it back.

Keep reading

I fell like i should apologize to people that have been following me for ages for my sudden obsession with Lakorn

i dont know how it happened but i`m glad it did

joceydraws:Celebrating 3 years working alongside this sponge guy!:)

joceydraws:

Celebrating 3 years working alongside this sponge guy!

:)


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toukatan:the end of an era.

toukatan:

the end of an era.


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Trying to keep track of all the boyfriends and graduations and engagements happening around me rn at near impossible speeds

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