#you guys can act like i’m funny it’s okay

give edward teach, also known as blackbeard, a phone with a spiral cord. let the man twirl the SHIT out of it as he kicks his feet and tells izzy about this ADORABLE man he met, while izzy just clenches the receiver with pure white hot rage.

side note: stede has an old candlestick phone because i said so, and the comedic imagery of him holding the ear piece makes me giggle.