SO imagine this. You are a member of an proud and violent warrior race. You are the handmaiden to the less violent, but probably still p proud Princess of the intergalactic empire that most of your race belongs to. One day, your Princess, whom you have served loyally for many years, gets into some bullshit star-crossed lover biz with a man who is 1) a member of the race your race has been fighting since basically forever, B) A member of the organization that has consistently opposed your empire, and Lastly) who lives on a different planet and is therefore not gonna be around when she predictably finds out she is having his goddamn baby, because of course she is.
So your Princess has this illegitimate half alien baby now, and her Dad (your Emperor) is like “wow, no” and tries to have it executed on the grounds of he doesn’t like it and he’s in goddamned charge. And the Princess is looking at you, and her eyes are doing that thing were they’re really big and sad, and her lips all pout-y, and if you had the frame of reference you would totally call her out on doing the puppy eye thing but you don’t. So what do you do?
You take the weird hybrid baby to his baby daddy, effectively exiling yourself from your home planet, to go live on a planet were Everyone Actually Really Totally Hates You, also known as Earth(y).
Sadly, when you get to earth, were you expect to find help from the legendary super-powered princess impregnating warrior hero guy and his buds, you find that the guy has quite rudely kicked the bucket. So here you are, on a hostile alien planet, with no one to help your exiled self or your exiled prince who is half a species you have almost no experience with and also has a price on his head despite the fact he is not yet strong enough to lift said head without help. So again, what do you do?
You become a realtor.
Yeah, that’s right. You get a fucking job. You settle the fuck down. You take a fucking Pilates class. You raise the weird fucking hybrid baby. In fact, you do not just raise the weird fucking hybrid baby; You love and cherish the weird fucking hybrid baby. You teach the exiled heir to your proud, violent, warrior race to be a sweet ‘lil nerd, who loves pokemon, and comic books, and tries to talk through confrontations, and occasionally hits you with those puppy-dog eyes that got you into this mess in the first place. You don’t complain though. You don’t complain when you’re Prince gets sick and there is literally no one on earth to turn to (because who on earth has ever seen a skrull/kree hybrid, much less treated one?). You don’t complain when you hear Galactus destroys your homeworld and everyone on it (how can you explain to your Prince that you’re grieving for his mother when you’re right there?). You don’t complain when the Super-Skrull burst through the wall of you adopted son’s friend-who-is-totally-not-his-boyfriend-mom-oh-my-god’s apartment and demands your baby go with him. Becauseyou are not someone who backs down from a challenge.
You pull out a gun and you challenge the greatest warrior of your proud, violent warrior race.
You lose.
You die.
But it’s all right. Your son’s not-boyfriend will save him. Your weird alien hybrid baby will become a weird alien hybrid hero, and later, a weird alien hybrid King. Somewhere, your Princess and her bullshit star-crossed lover are very proud. Somewhere else, the galaxies worst Grandfather is very furious. But you, well. Who even are you?
I don’t know. Because the writers never bothered giving you a name. It’s all right though. You know why?
365 Marvel Comics Paper Cut-Out SuperHeroes - One Hero, Every Day, All Year…
June 2nd - Hulkling
Theodore ‘Teddy’ Altman is the son of the Kree hero, Mar-Vell, and the Skrull princess, Anelle. The two had a brief affair in the midst of the Kree/Skrull War and the child was a closely guarded secret. Fearing for his safety, Princess Anelle sent the infant away with her nursemaid. The nursemaid brought the child to Earth hoping to leave him in the care of his father. Upon learning Captain Mar-Vell had died, however, the nursemaid decided to raise the child herself and used her Skrull abilities to assume the guise of a single mother named Mary-Jo Altman.
Teddy appeared human throughout his childhood yet discovered his ability to shapeshift in early adolescence. He had inherited this ability from his mother; along with greatly enhanced physical strength inherited from his father.
As a teenager, Teddy was asked by Iron Lad to help him form a new team of ‘Young Avengers’ in an effort to defeat Iron Lad’s older self, Kang the Conquerer. Teddy agreed and assumed the alias of Hulkling. The Young Avengers were successful in fending off Kang. Teddy and his fellow Young Avengers, Wiccan, began dating shortly after forming the team.
Following further adventures, Teddy was abducted by The Super Skrull known as Kl’rt. Teddy was told that his true name was Dorrek VIII, grandson to the former Skrull Emperor and heir to the throne. Teddy had trouble believing this but was convinced when Kl’rt used a device that neutralized Ms. Altman’s shapeshifting abilities and revealed her to be a Skrull. Kl’t then killed Ms. Altman and insisted Teddy return to Skrull space with him so to unite the fractured Skrull Empire. Just then, solders of The Kree arrived, claiming Teddy as their own. A battle ensued between the Kree and Skrull forces as well as Teddy’s Young Avenger allies. The only solution that Teddy saw to end the conflict was to surrender. The Kree and Skrulls came to agree that Teddy would spend half the Earth-year with the Kree and the other half with the Skrull and decide on his on which side he would ultimately declare his ultimate allegiance to. After the two sides left it was revealed that the ‘Teddy’ who had departed was actually Kl’rt who had used his super Skrull powers to impersonate Teddy thus allowing the young man to remain on earth with his friends.
Following many more adventures, Teddy was once more approached by representatives of the Kree and Skrull peoples. A tentative alliance between the two empires had been achieved and Teddy was asked to lead this new alliance and acted as a type of figurehead to further strengthen the union. The prospect of being able to help put an end to countless centuries of war was too great of a responsibility to pass up and Teddy agreed to this request. At the same time, Teddy’s relationship with Billy had deepened and the idea of being separated for good was too much to bare for either of them. The Kree/Skrull union would likely not agree to Teddy’s being with a human mate so he and Billy superseded any such disagreement by arranging a quick marriage and a small marriage attended by the Young Avengers.
Teddy became Dorrek the Eighth, leader of the Kree/Skrull Alliance and commander of their joint forces. The first great challenge to his rule was the threat of the Cotati. Teddy had to devise a means of defeating these enemies without the use of The Pyre (a super weapon that would cause the earth’s sun to detonate in supernova). Despite betrayals among his own forces, Teddy was able to prevail with the aide of The Avengers and Fantastic Four. The victory cemented Billy’s position as king and greatly strengthen the union between the Kree and Skrull peoples. In the aftermath of the victory, a celebration was held on the Alliance’s flagship where Teddy and Billy redid their wedding with a lavish ceremony in which Billy was formally inducted as prince consort and court wizard. It was really nice.
Now situated on Throneworld II, Teddy has continued to guide the fledgling alliance in the hopes of a better tomorrow for the united citizens of the union, guarding it against the countless threats that are sure to come.
Hulkling first appeared in the pages of Young Avengers Vol. 1 #1 (2005).
I drew the cover for a fic my wife wrote! I highly recommend it if you want to feel a lot of things about Teddy’s mum and end up being very sad. At least, that’s what happened to me.
I’ve recently rediscovered the joys of cross-hatching and what better way to practice than drawing my favourite superhero. Watch this space for more YA, because I have his husband nearly finished >w<
I drew this after Emperor Hulkling came out and I was high on the euphoria of Thinkfast canon!! And then I forgot to post it because I tried to be fancy and the colours took forever!
Poor Teddy, third-wheeled again. He and Billy have definitely never done this to any of their friends.
