#zebra maybe

Okapis are short-necked forest giraffes. It took until like 1901 to convince white people that they were a real thing, even though you’d think that after that whole deal with platypuses they would have opened their minds a little bit. But okapis are solitary and chill exclusively in like the darkest, scariest part of the Congolese rain forest. They keep other okapis out of their secret jungle business with the usual gross as hell animal tactic of pissing all over everything, but they also have some weird ass scent gland things on their fucked up giraffe feet that spit out sticky black goo that smells like property lines. Hey okapis, maybe if you put some damn socks on and didn’t track that shit all over people’s hardwood floors someone would hang out with you.