#2003-2009 were excellent years for cars

Ideal Vehicle:

• Headlights that aren’t blinding anyone even a little bit
• Crumple zone
• Lack of touch screen
• Air bags
• Seatbelts
• Complete inability to connect to my phone in any way other than an aux port
• Computing power roughly equivalent to the Apollo 13 capsule
• Lack of wifi
• Doesn’t know where I am, ever
• Doesn’t require any subscription service
• >35mpg
• Enough replaced parts that I can make the joke “officially it’s a 2007, but on average it’s closer to a 2012.”