#adventures in parenting
I’m reading George to 5.5yo. It’s a little advanced for him, but he picked it out based on the cover and, after reading the synopsis, I saw no reason not to. But he does have some questions, and as a parent, I’m going to be upfront about them – and my answers.
Who’s Ms. Udell? George’s teacher. Pay attention please.
Who’s Scott? George’s brother. Seriously, if you’re not going to pay attention, I’ll stop reading.
Who’s Charlotte? The spider in the book they’re reading.
Wait, did Charlotte die? Yes, that’s why George was so sad, remember?
How did Charlotte die? Old age, I think.
How old was she? Look, I’m not sure how long spiders live. When we send this book back to the library, we’ll get that one out and we can read it together.
We’re getting the next Hamster Princess book first, right? Yes, of course.
What does “freak” mean? It’s a very mean name. It means you think someone is weird in a very bad way. A lot of times it’s used for gay or trans kids, and it’s a really bad thing to say to someone. I don’t want you ever using that word to or about someone.
I won’t, but a kid said it to me. That wasn’t kind of them. Please don’t ever call anyone that.
Me or my friends? Well, I sure hope none of your friends say it, but I’m not their mom so there’s not a lot I can do about that.
And that’s literally the first remotely hard question he’s had. Kids, man.
My brain seems to have decided that I’ve Got the Power would mash-up perfectly with It’s Peanut Butter Jelly Time, because I’ve been experiencing a nonstop loop, stuck in my head of:
It’s getting kinda hectic with a baseball bat!
Another earworm mashup, for all you parents out there:
Thomas – he’s the cheeky one!
James – he’s vain but lots of fun!
Lisa can philosophize
Bart’s adept at spinning lies….
