if you don’t think biphobia is real pls unfollow me right now :)
if you think bi women are disgusting for sleeping with men doubly so :)
this was a post on r/truelesbians where op was asking “why are bi women rejected by a lot of lesbians?”
what i think a lot of ppl don’t understand when they call us “bincels” and “rapey” when we call out biphobia is that— we don’t, in fact, want lesbians to date us. not if they’re going to be saying shit like this. it’s the horrible things they say that we criticize.
i feel physically sick reading things like this. and these are p common opinions to have. if you aren’t really confident or secure in your sexuality/identity (which i’m not), you start to internalize these things. it takes a toll on you. the shame and self hatred can get overwhelming sometimes.
and there are ppl who try to say this doesn’t happen, it’s not an actual problem, bi women are just whiny and self victimizing. here is just a fraction of the receipts. there are literally hundreds of posts and comments like this on that sub and other similar subs.
i have always supported lesbians and will continue to support lesbians, and i am grateful to the lesbians who have done the same for me— but ultimately, bi women come first. i haven’t seen things like this on my own dash but if/when i do, i will call it out, even if i am laughed at, insulted, ridiculed, attacked, etc. i try to avoid getting into discourse as much as possible as it’s extremely stressful for me but we need to stand up for ourselves. no one else will.
bi women i love you we are not dirty, impure, tainted or lesser in any way because of our attraction to men regardless of what anyone says. i say that but i even have a hard time accepting it myself.
we are perfect the way we are. we are whole.weareenough
this shit also really just drives home the point that there’s a difference between someone being biphobic and someone just not wanting to date bi people.
just not wanting to date us bc you want to share the experience of being fully homosexual with your partner? perfectly understandable, i prefer to date other bisexual people for that exact reason. not wanting to date us just because you don’t want to, no explanation required? also fine! you don’t have to know why or want to say why, you’re allowed to not date anyone you don’t want to date for any reason.
explicitly stating that you find us disgusting and that you think about us having sex with men constantly and it disgusts you? maybe work that out with a therapist and also leave bi women the fuck alone. and don’t be mad at us when we don’t entertain your biphobia as something valid to think about us :)
this kinda shit is also directed towards lesbians who thought they were bi/generally aren’t ‘gold stars’ for whatever reason. and that’s pretty shitty, too. maybe stop and think about why you thing women who have slept with men are disgusting to you. misogyny and biphobia wrapped into one shitty belief lmao love that.
side note, yes it’s natural to think about who your partner has been with, but if you’re obsessing over it to such a degree that you make yourself nauseated thinking about it, that’s a problem. and if you have sex with us anyway and are actively trying not to think about something that revolts you that much, i would suggest perhaps not doing that and stop being a shitty person. no one deserves to have a sexual partner who thinks they’re gross.
