mindjumpthoughts:

me-is-an-intj:

Ask an INTJ

I do this periodically. If you have a question for an INTJ about stereotypes, relationships, behavioral traits, and stuff like that, feel free to drop an ask in my inbox!

I know this isn’t your inbox but I want to create conversation about this to my blog:

My brother is an INTJ, and I’m getting worried of him. He is working as an math researcher, is pretty good at it and even travels because of his job to tell about his reasults to other countries. I am proud of him, but he is awfully alone.

I know he is a social person: we shared friends and would always hang out when we were younger. We would play role playing games together, and he would love to be the game master. But now we live far away (9 hour time difference) and I follow from far away how he slowly isolates himself from all human connection, digging deeper and deeper to computer games. I think it’s a good hobby, but right now it’s all in his life.

I want to help, but my methods are not always the best. I have suggested him to find game groups for boardgames or dnd, not only online. He is really lazy to step out of his comfort zone, and does not put energy at all to “finding friends” (I used to include him always to my friend gatherings so he got used to the fact that things just happened?)

I am too close to the situation to see it clearly. What do you think my brother would want me to do, and do you think what he wants is good for him?

-concerned ENFP little sister

Ha. My older brother (who is, ironically enough, an ENFP) has a similar problem with me. He keeps trying to find me new friends, and I personally am completely neutral on the whole thing.

I think a lot of times you guys tend to forget that we are very comfortable being by ourselves. As long as we know people love us (like our siblings) we don’t really need a whole lot of interaction. Granted, that doesn’t mean he should be alone and isolated from human contact, but I don’t think you need to worry too much. If it becomes unhealthy, the occasional gentle nudge from you to be social should eventually snap him out of it. It’s just a slow process.

Dnd is a good lure to get him out of hermit mode. Maybe find people you know irl that he can play with online? It’s not the same, sure, but eventually it might move him to actually go to someone’s house or a comic store or something and do it irl.

Hope I’ve been of some help!