saturn opposite chiron

-this aspect is usually one that suggests a difficult or wounded relationship with the father or a key father-like/authoritative figure in a persons life; people with this aspect may have had a challenging relationship with their father [or similar figure] who may have been overbearing, unfair, aggressive while in some ways simultaneously distant, absent or caught up in his own wounds/struggles

-people with this placement may have a tendency towards feelings of inadequecy, self doubt, low self esteem, fear of rejection, lack of confidence in their abilities, imposter syndrome, feeling undeserving, feeling pressured to be perfect etc

-however, not only do they struggle with these feelings towards themselves, those with this aspect may also be quite judgemental towards others also; perhaps often rejecting others, being a harsh critic, setting unrealistic expectations for others, projecting their fears onto others, expecting the worst from others. a lot of the time they do not act this way out of intentional negativity towards others; usually this is a projection/representation of how they were treated by others or how they treat/think of themselves

-they may find themselves working tirelessly in order to achieve some sense of feeling enough; although a lot of the time they are chasing an unnatainable goal as their feeling of inadequecy is often very deep rooted and not so easily resolved through unrelated achievements

-people with this aspect may commonly feel extremely uncomfortable around anyone who is particularly authorative, aggressive, strict, harsh etc as they hate being in situations where they may be treated unfairly, looked down upon, judged etc which may stem from experiences from their childhood or interactions they had early in their life [again, possibly influenced by their father figure or a key authorative figure in their lives]

-because of this, they may feel very uneasy around authority figures such as bosses, teachers, people they deem ‘better’ than them or intimidating etc

-it is often common for people with this aspect to hold on to a lot of trauma, both their own and that of those closest to them/around them; they may feel responsible for it in some way or feel like they need to hold onto it to relieve others from doing so. a lot of the time, they do this quietly so people may not realise or notice just how much they are dealing with or trying to process

-furthermore, while one person may experience something and let go of it quickly/easily, overcome or forget about it, a person with this aspect is much more likely to keep the trauma of it with them, sometimes very deeply

-people with this aspect may experience family related issues or may struggle to feel secure within their family or loved by family members; they may find it difficult to comprehend that family can be loving, safe, secure, caring, etc. this does not always mean they have a traumatic response/relationship with their family, they may just feel very distant to their family or alienated from their family, like they don’t fit in

-they may struggle to find their place in the world; their fear of rejection combined with their fear of abandonment can cause them to both hold on to things that do not serve them while not making the most out of potential opportunities due to fear of failure/rejection, they may also be very suspicious of others and struggle to trust others, often keeping people at arms length and struggling to develop the deep connections they have craved for so long

-at times, people with saturn opposite chiron may feel like their relatioinship with themselves is what holds them back from healing, connecting with others or achieving what they want. they may struggle with lonliness and even feel like they deserve to feel this way. they may also struggle with feelings of shame, dissapointment or resentment when it comes to how they feel about themselves

-they may feel like they don’t ever fit in; they may feel so far away from others and find it hard to connect with people. they might believe that they have too many problems which prevent them from establishing healthy relationships/connections with others. because of this, they may trick themselves into believing that they are simply destined to be independent and self sufficient; that they do not need anyone other than themselves and because of this may feel very dissapointed, guilty, weak or even ashamed in themselves if they ever feel like they want/need a relationship as so often they assume that to depend on someone else is a weakness for them

-because it is common for them to hold on to trauma/emotions etc for others, it may be also common for people with this aspect to feel upset if they do not feel needed by others; so often, they have a tendency to pride themselves for holding it all together and being there for others [even if it is detrimental to themselves] and it gives them a sense of security to fit themselves into others’ lives by being useful or serving a purpose. if they do not feel needed by others, they may feel discarded, unwanted, useless, misplaced; their sense of purpose is taken away from them and without that they may feel like they have nothing left as they are given security by giving so much of themselves to others [so that they don’t have to deal with their own issues]

-sometimes, people with this aspect may struggle with trying to understand their trauma or issues [chiron rules our wounds and struggles] and because of this they may find themselves behaving in very self-destructive ways in order to 'recreate’ or find the trauma so that they can understand it in the present and heal, although this usually does more harm than good because it causes them to stray further and further away from the root of the problem

-this can be a very, very difficult aspect to have; people with it may become very withdrawn at times, absorbed in their own problems/traumas/wounds, lost in their own head, obsessing over the unfairness of what they are feeling/what they have been through

-the lesson of this aspect is to learn how to deal with pain and trauma that stems from the wound caused by chiron; we are never to blame for the bad things that have happened to us and we should never blame ourselves for it. however, the influence of saturn on this aspect is urging us to have more control over how we allow our pain to affect our lives; it encourages us to decide how much power we give to the pain and trauma in our life and be in control of how we continue living with it

-although this is a particularly challenging and painful aspect to have, the influence of saturn [ruler of restriction, rules, control, limitation] encourages people to limit how much pain and power this trauma caused by chiron holds over them, it encourages people to choose healing to overcome their issues; rather than cycles of self destruction or revisiting old trauma hoping for a different outcome

-it is often beneficial for people with this aspect to learn/understand/acknowledge that while wounds [chiron] may not dissapear or be completely forgotten about, they still have potential to be in control [saturn] of how much of an impact they have; this aspect is trying to teach that trauma doesn’t have to define a person and that people are able to regain control even after struggling with something

saturn conjunct ascendant

-this aspect tends to manifest as a person who is perhaps more shy, reserved or even conservative; this is because saturn is the planet of limitation, restriction etc while the ascendant represents a persons identity and how they come across to others

-responsibility is often a key theme or aspect of a persons life if they have this aspect; they may feel responsible for others, struggle with responsibility, feel burdened by responsibility or take on the responsibilities of others because it is what they are used to dealing with; they may feel responsible for things that are not actually anything to do with them [eg feeling guilty for problems that are not their own fault or caused by themselves] or may have experienced people dumping their responsibilities onto them from a young age/early in life

-because of their possible issues with responsibility, they may struggle with feeling like they need to be serious or the responsible one in life as this may simply be what they are used to; sometimes they may feel like they cannot relax, unwind or have fun because they are too concerned with their responsibilities or things they need to do

-people with this aspect tend to be the type to worry a lot; what makes this worse is that not only do they have a tendency to worry a lot about their own problems, but they also become overly concerned with the problems of others; burdening themselves with other peoples issues and even feeling like it is their responsibility to resolve or take on the burden of other peoples issues

-sometimes, people with this aspect may feel very down and exhausted as at times it can seem like the universe is playing them and testing them; they may experience struggles, delays, restrictions, challenges etc frequently and at times this may cause them to feel like success/achievement etc is being denied for them

-if they have experienced a lot of setbacks and struggles, this can cause them to be extremely cautious and at times even pessimistic which can also lead them to worry even more; perhaps struggling to feel confident in their abilities/skills, even constantly feeling like they aren’t ready or aren’t deserving of success

-this negative mindset can create a negative cycle of self-doubt followed by hesitation to take action, leading to the reinforcement of the belief that they are incapable of achieving whatever it is that they want

-people with this aspect will do well to understand that it is not good to constantly procrastinate or put things off out of doubt, fear, worry or hesitation; it will only make them feel less confident, ensure they miss out on opportunities and cause them to doubt themselves even more than when they started

-it is important that they keep working towards what they want and do not let fear based mentalities hold them back; this doubt will only hold them back and make things worse for them, they need to learn to take action despite any insecurity they may feel

-people with this aspect may experience feelings of depression, loneliness, insecurity, pessimism etc and they may also have a tendency to often ‘get too into their head’ and become consumed by their worries/doubts/negativity etc

-a lot of issues they experience may be helped or avoided by constantly taking action and trying their hardest not to remain idle; when they aren’t doing, they will usually be getting lost in their own head which is never good for them

-because of this, people with this aspect may benefit from writing to do lists, journalling, planning, preparing etc so that they know what they need to do and know what steps they need to take to get it done; they are usually not the type to be able to take action spontaneously and usually need to feel a sense of achievement after ticking tasks off that they planned to do, otherwise they may slip into feelings of negativity and end up procrastinating/hesitating/putting things off

-this aspect does seem to bring with it a lot of negative traits/experiences, but many of the things that those with it in their chart may struggle with in life do tend to improve as they get older; saturn is often the planet that teaches us lessons to improve ourselves so once we learn to improve or work with these less desirable traits/experiences we can become better and feel better [for example, with age and experience, people with this aspect may learn to worry less and take life less seriously because they have been through situations that have taught them that it is okay to have fun and not be so serious/responsible all the time]

-although people with this aspect may have a tendency to procrastinate [this can seem very contradictory to their tendency to be overly responsible; but this sense of responsibility can be very pressuring and worrying for them which causes them to put things off in an attempt to find relief from this] if they are eventually able to learn to take action, embrace opportunities as they come and get things done, they will likely be respected/admired for their hard work, reliability, loyalty, attention to detail etc

-even though people with this aspect may be big worriers; their experience with responsibility usually allows them to be good at providing advice to others and they are also usually the type to be good in a crisis or in difficult times as they are used to handling things [even if they might not feel like they are good at dealing with things, in the moment where they are forced to take action they usually handle it well]

-those with this aspect are often very time conscious; time is commonly something that can bring them a lot of stress/worry/concern; they may frequently experience feelings of 'time running out’, 'not enough time’, 'waiting for the right time’, 'needing to do things at the right time’ etc

-because saturn is the planet of restriction and the ascendant impacts self expression and identity; people with this aspect may come across as cold or reserved to others. if they are particularly self aware, they will know that they come across this way to others which can cause them even more stress and cause them to worry that they don’t come across well to others, which can lead them to struggle to connect with people [again, doubt/fear holding them back]

-on a lighter, slightly brighter note, these people are often the type to be caring and can tend to take on the 'motherly’ role in a friendship group; they are seen as responsible, dependable, good at giving advice etc [maybe others cannot sense/understand their inner turmoil and instead only notice their ability to handle responsibilities and show compassion to others]

-if they aren’t particularly reserved, cold or shy, it may just be that they instead have more of a desire/inclination to try to control how they are seen by others; as saturn is the planet of restriction, it is possible that people with this aspect can still act confident and outgoing yet really want to restrict how people see them and only want others to perceive them on their terms

-as saturn is the planet of rules and limitations; people with this aspect may have a lot of rules they have set for themselves, and these may or not actually limit them from things more than they serve them

-even if a person with this aspect is very confident and self-expressive, they may at times feel a bit held back by their tendency to be very concerned about how they are seen/perceived by others, they may feel at times like no matter how carefree/confident they try to be, they still struggle to 'let go’ or be exactly who they want to be out of fear of looking stupid to others or being judged by others [therefore, in some cases their confidence may just be a carefully curated mask of a personality that they think others will like to see and will respond to better]

-people with this placement are not doomed to struggle with their identity/image/self-expression their whole life, though! every step they make to express themselves authentically, develop their confidence, fight their doubts/insecurities etc will provide them with increased confidence and a sense of achievement; some aspects of life [taking action, showing their true selves etc] may be simply harder for them but once they learn to relax around others, let go more, take action, get out of their head etc they will be able to embrace more opportunities, develop their sense of self, build their confidence and become more self-assured etc

-it is important for people with this aspect to learn to find balance; balance between handling responsibility and letting loose, balance between discipline and risk-taking, balance between timing things right and taking action…