#but a lowkey positive anxiety dump idk

Personal life talk and maybe tmi but I’m in such a weird space right now where I feel okay except when I have chemo but I feel okay because of the chemo (but I’m on round 12 and I’m so over it) but I’m scared of stopping because what if I immediately get worse and if I don’t get worse when do I get to start thinking about remission? Aside from now when I dream of remission and lowkey plan the party I’m going to have when I officially don’t have cancer. And it’s nice that I have days when I feel well enough to think in terms of “when” I get better not “if”.