#chaos is a butterfly
Form 43 Section X Subsection Y.I.i: Request permission for use of private conference rooms, high security meeting, select Ministry personnel.
Time & Date: 9:00 P.M. 2nd August 2014
Ministry Personnel in attendance: Office of Minister of Magic, Head & Permanent Private Secretary of the Department of International Magical Cooperation, Head MI7, Head & Deputy Head of the Auror Office, Head & Permanent Private Undersecretary of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Head of the Goblin Liasion Office, Press Office
Approved:
[sign]
Kingsley Shacklebolt
————————————————————————-
Meeting Minutes: transcr. J.F.F.
Agenda: German crisis.
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Head of DIMC opening statements concerning German Ministry’s frantic attempts to get English Ministry to atone for their wizards’ research in the Magischeforschungsamt.
Fat chance
German Ministry also apparently pushing International Confederation of Wizards to investigate security policies at Azkaban & for the imposition of greater restrictions on high security prisoners’ rights at Azkaban so as to prevent similar occurrences in the future. Table agreed that these are unreasonable demands and will not be acted upon. Haha take that Deputy Secretary of the Press Office suggests pre-empt public announcement by the Germans and have a press conference detailing progress this Ministry has made in terms of improved rights for all sections of wizarding society, focus on ordinary wix and slip in occasional references to Azkaban. Also point out deplorable state of prisoners’ rights in other countries and call for fellow countries to work on improving prisoners’ rights in the name of wixen decency.
Never thought the Creevey kid capable of such chicanery why is he hanging around in the Press Office?
Goblin Liaison Office adamant that Goblin storm can be ridden out. Finally agreed to push PPU Granger-Weasley’s draft policy titled Policy for the Promotion of the Welfare of Sentient Magical Beings through.About bloody time Granger-Weasley proposes we announce advance news of this to Goblins at Gringott’s to assure them that we are working towards their welfare. Goblin Liaison Office skeptical that this will appease Goblins.
Sincerely hope Rookwood’s book dishes some dirt on this fellow and he has to resign.
Granger-Weasley patiently explained to Goblin Liaison Office that this is only a temporary measure and that the Goblins will know that it is a temporary measure and that the Ministry fully plans on introducing more legislation to improve their rights/position in society, it is obstinate wix in the Wizengamot that are the problem.
They really ought to look into administering IQ tests as a qualification for public office. NEWTs are rubbish.
Motion: Proposed private apology to German Ministry, send four elite Auror Units to Germany to help with peacekeeping and law enforcement. Press conference with all members of the press tomorrow morning. Call for emergency convening of the Wizengamot next week instead of usual session in November.
Votes: All for.
Amendments: None.
Meeting adjourned at 11 P.M.
Notes: Junior Secretary Finch-Fletchley to refrain from making private notes on Ministry documents. - K.S.
From the Office of the Permanent Private Undersecretary, Department of International Magical Cooperation
To: Minister of Magic
Dispatched: 7:00 P.M 2nd August 2014
Copy to: Department of Magical Law Enforcement, Auror Office
Status: Classified
German Ministry in uproar. Emergency meeting scheduled in 2 hours.
- E.M
Encl: Headlines from the Evening Edition of Die Magische Zeitung
Attachment: Frontpage of Die Magische Zeitung
KOBOLDUNRUHEN: BANKEN BIS AUF WEITERES GESCHLOSSEN.
Minister für Internationale Magische Zusammenarbeit verlangt eine öffentliche Untersuchung.
(tr: Unrest among Goblins: Banks shut until further notice. Minister of International Magical Cooperation calls for a public inquiry)
[German headline translation kindly provided by trigilis. Big thank you to sehnsuchtskrank&sansarising who reached out to me to help with the translation!]
Memos from various Departments from the Ministry of Magic
To: the Office of the Permanent Private Secretary, Department of Magical Law Enforcement
Dispatched between: 8 - 8:15 AM, 11th of August 2014.
Status: Private
Well that went well, wouldn’t you agree, Hermione?
- Harry
Charming work, Hermione. Do keep it up. At this rate there won’t be an England to talk of.
- Kingsley
Excellent work. Press flocking around office. Send details about bill ASAP. Fantastic opportunity for PR. Also for starting 90767346th Goblin Rebellion. Lovely. You do keep us all in business.
- D. C.
Memos from the Office of the Permanent Private Secretary, Department of Magical Law Enforcement
To: Various departments at the Ministry of Magic
Dispatched between: 8 - 8:15 AM, 11th of August 2014.
Status: Private
Your persiflage does not amuse.
- Hermione
Memos between the Office of the Permanent Private Secretary, Department of Magical Law Enforcement & the Head of Auror Office
Dispatched between: 8:15 - 8:30 PM, 10th of August 2014.
Status: Private
I can’t believe you let Vakhashivili go visit Azkaban! Do I really have to do everything for you and Ron?
- Hermione
Believe it or not, I didn’t sign that slip.
- Harry
Oh.Oh. Oh no.
- Hermione
Zabini,
You knew about this, didn’t you?
Draco.
Malfoy,
I don’t know what you’re talking about. If your English Ministry is bent on being ridiculous arses, then it’s all you deserve.
Blaise.
Zabini,
I wasn’t talking about the shutdown at Gringotts or the goblin strike, I saw that coming from miles away. I’m talking murder most foul.
Malfoy.
Draco,
My lips are sealed.
Blaise.
Draco,
Not so chirpy now are we? Got our own troubles have we? Can’t access the Malfoy family vaults? That must be so horrible.
Corvus.
Corv,
Piss off. Also, why the bloody hell are the birds bringing your letters some form of tropical exotica?
Draco.
Draco,
Ask your dumb English Ministry why.
Corvus.
Dear Sofia,
I am delighted to tell you that conditions at Azkaban have, indeed, improved. Their food is really quite excellent, they do know how to take care of their prisoners, these English. You’ll be glad to know that our dear friend is being quite well looked after.
Your loving brother,
Andrei Vakhashivili
Dear mama,
I’m writing to you to inform you that the Malfoys suspect something, quite possibly might be preparing to sell information to the Ministry.
Your loving son,
Blaise
Blaise dear,
The Ministry knows perfectly well and have taken the warning, or at least Mr Weasley and Mr Macmillan have taken the warning and conveyed it to their superiors. There is no doubt they know, there is no profit the Malfoys can make out of this. Do not worry yourself dear, we have it all in hand.
With love,
Your devoted mother.
Form 67 Section B Subsection C.I.iii: Request clearance for outgoing letters, high security prisoner
Prisoner No.: R080421
To: Portia Rookwood Montgomery, Hoxheath, Cambridgeshire
Date: 9th August 2014
Approved:
[sign]
Auror Adam Smith
Head, Unit 9, Azkaban
Sister dearest,
Riddle me this: what sort of man requires three days to be laid in a grave?
The answer, of course, which you wouldn’t know, darling Gryffindor that you are, is a special sort of saviour.
Mother used to say the knocker on the Ravenclaw dorm room was a seer. Nonsense, father used to tell her, don’t teach the boy superstitious rubbish. It always used to ask me this question. What takes three days to lay in the grave? Imagine eleven year old me, baffled by it. Its how I met Freddie. And if I hadn’t met him, I would have never met him. Things would have turned out quite differently. I would have been plain Mr Dash of Nowhere In Particular, a learned man and nothing more and maybe, maybe I would have grown up and wifed and had an heir and a spare and you would still have a job.
So I suppose there is something to be said for mother’s pet theory after all.
If you want to know at whose door to lay the blame for your seclusion in the countryside, it’s the Ravenclaw knocker. Don’t worry dear you’ll make a charming country maid.
Never
I’m s
P
Did you really mean
Would he be
I wish you and Charles the very best. I am very sorry for everything.
Your loving brother,
- Augustus.
Memo from the Head of the Department of International Magical Cooperation
To: Minister of Magic
Copy to: Head of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, MI7
Dispatched: 3 AM, 11/08/2014
Status: Private
This isn’t just goblins anymore. Its either them or Russia.
- P.W.
By a staff reporter,
London
The British Galleon rose ten points today when the Gringotts strike, now on its third week, was called off today morning by the head goblin at Gringotts and the bank reopened for business as usual. It is uncertain whether this marks a final end to the strike, or if this is merely to last until further notice. Analysts believe, however, that it is unlikely that the goblins of Gringotts will go on strike again within the next few months, pointing to the dramatic fall in the value of the British Galleon. In addition to this, the probable passing of Mrs Granger-Weasley’s bill for the Welfare of Sentient Magical Beings during the winter session of the Wizengamot should appease potential strikers and deter them from future action.
From: The Daily Prophet, page 33, 1st September 2014.
Malfoy,
How are the Malfoy farms doing? I heard England had an uncommonly good crop this year. And an unusual rise in crop exports; ten times the projected growth, I’m told. Bit unusual don’t you think?
How much spare cash do you keep in your safe, by the way? If I were you, I’d make sure my safe was well-filled.
Yours,
Blaise.
Zabini,
Maybe you should get a job with Quidnunc? composing their cryptic crossword. I’m sure they’d be delighted to have someone as abstruse as you working for them.
Yours,
Draco.