some of you need to go outside and I dont mean that in a mean or condescending way I mean it in a “you would benefit from talking to real people face to face, and developing social skills” type way
genuinely tho. more and more frequently i interact with people online who shock me with how young they act for how old they are, because i associate that level of social and interpersonal inability with fucking. fourteen year olds. there is a noticeable deterioration of social skills and it’s annoying as someone who actually knows how to talk to people, because i find myself having to almost parent people basically my age into learning how to properly communicate. no, just saying insults and then adding /lh does not mean you’re friends with someone. you can’t just call someone a bitch or a whore or any type of slur and get surprised when they aren’t okay with that, because if you actually took a step outside you’d realize those are words that have a whole lot of weight behind them and online get thrown around by social infants with no clue how to properly talk to people.
people are always coming to tell me that i’m very nice or very welcoming, and i don’t know how to explain this to you, but it’s because i have actual social skills. i know how to be polite. i know how to listen to people. i know how to actually form healthy relationships with people who aren’t just words on a screen. and it’s come to my realization that not everyone does, which makes it extra exhausting to keep up conversations with literal adults who don’t even understand the basics of interpersonal communication.
this puts it into words well ty
tags from @/lemonberry-conda and they’re entirely correct
I do viscerally get the “this just does not come naturally to me so I am not even going to try (and make a virtue of not trying) but: there is value in learning and practicing social skills. There is value in trying to be kind, in trying to communicate and connect, in practicing empathy and compassion. And they all absolutely take practice! Watch, learn, listen, ask questions, treat them as knowledge worth learning and keeping and refining, and don’t give up if it doesn’t go perfectly all the time.
Someone once explained small talk to me as an exchange of acknowledgements - "you are a person” “Yes, and you are also a person”. And, like, there is a huge amount of value contained in that exchange, and in the cultural shorthand we use for it.
