#credits

Credits and Lyrics for Episode 10 of Our Dumb Universe

starring:

Announcer - James B Kennedy
Dankent - Nathaniel Kent
Kvold - Happy Anderson
Pangla - Melissa Lusk
Sondra - Lauren Lim Jackson
Valborg - Emily Gardner Xu Hall
Fuzzo - Jared Loftin
The Sleepy One - Haley Bowery
Bloor - Carl Howell

written by Jonathan A. Goldberg

music by Matt roi Berger
recorded, mixed and edited by Martin Fowler

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

SPEAR FIGHT EXPLOSION

                                  ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Eye meets eye
All is quiet
Tension’s high, no one moves… then in a

Crash and swipe
Flash of light, they
Smash and slice, and they’re locked in to a

Spear fight explosion, it’s on!
Til one’s left broken, it’s on!

Valborg gives
Swipes and trips
Kvold is hit and she stab stab stab stabs!

At his head
But he bends
Sweeps her legs, but she jump flips back

Spear fight explosion,
All blur’s in motion, it’s on!

Searching for an opening,
Worth exposing, it’s on!

Circling - sizing up each other
Kvold swings in - Valborg gives a counter
But as she spins - Kvold is swinging downward
Catches her ribs - Valborg gives a shout out:

                                 ETHEREAL BAND BEING AND VALBORG

A-a-a-a-a-i!
A-a-a-a-a-i!

                                 ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Kvold is on the go, not missing an instant
Peppers her with blows, Valborg on defense and
He’s laughing cuz he knows, Valborg must be thinking

                                  VALBORG

Is this how I go?  The end of my existence?

                                ETHEREAL BAND BEING

A-a-a-a-a-i! A-a-a-a-a-i!

                                 VALBORG

No!
I I I I I am a warrior!
I I I I I am a warrior!

                                  ETHEREAL BAND BEING

Valborg spins on her feet
She leaps, she’s in the air
Into his face a crashing knee
Catches her foe quite unaware

Her spirit is stirred, her motions are blurred, Kvold’s looking worried and pounded
His eyes are swole, can barely cope, she’s in control and shouting

                                VALBORG

I I I I I am a warrior!
I I I I I am a warrior!

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

UGGGH

What is Ugggh but a feeling,
That we’re feeling deep inside
From the first breath we are breathing
Thru the last before we die
What is Ugggh but what we’re seeking
Every moment we’re alive:
Yes it’s Ugggh, yes it’s Ugggh, yes it’s Ugggh

What is Ugggh but a mission
You pursue with all your might
With every set back ammunition
For your heart, your solum your fight
Yes, Ugggh’s the definition
Of the pain that stokes the fire
And she was, oh yes she was, she was Ugggh

Oh she was Uggh!
Hard like a stone
Warm like a fire
He life her own
And tho I miss her
Inside I know
She’ll Ugggh forever
Our hearts her home

And now she’s free to wander
To leave her pain behind
To seek out in the yonder
What she’s searched so hard to find
With the space wind in her hair
And the wisdom that is Ugggh
Gonna go on home to Greenland
Be back with the ones she loved
And tho she’s gone she’s living on
In every on of us with all her Ugggh…

What is Ugggh but an empty
When you’re mourning deep inside
A hole you’ve no hope for mending
Where your friend once did reside
Cept “Ugggh” what’s there to say
To remember, to inspire
She was Ugggh, She was Ugggh, She was Ugggh

Oh yes she was, she was Uggh, she was ugggh
Yes she was Ugggh!
And we are Ugggh!
Now and forever
Cuz what she’s done
And she will be with us
In those we love
And she was love… Yes she was Ugggh.

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

TREASURE MADNESS

                             SONDRA

Deep in the belly of a treasure ship
Jade vases, laser rays, but just one pick
Palms wet, brow sweat, I’m feeling sick, oh no!

                             FUZZO

Gold crowns, silk gowns, platinum pearls
The highest valued treasures from a million worlds
Calling my name, think I’m gonna hurl!  Oh no!

                            ALL

Want it!
Oh you really want it!
Oh you really want it!
Oh you really want it!

                             PANGLA
Priceless tridents, Diamonds the size of islands
Feats of science - Fire breathing laser lions!
Eyes are widening, fantasize what’s mi-e-ii-e-ii-e-iiine

                            FUZZO

Jewels, gems, a giant bone
Riches, countless, unknown
All that glitters, take it home with me!

                            ALL

Want it!
Oh I really want it!
Oh I really want it!
Oh I really want it!

Treasure madness has got us gasping at all we could ever want!

                             SONDRA
Loads of gadgets!

                             FUZZO
An emerald casket!

                            PANGLA
A bottomless croissant!

                            SONDRA
Jet packs!

                            FUZZO
Tapestries!

                            PANGLA
Eggsacks full of children’s dreams!

                              ALL
A score with choice galore!
Skin’s gone hot and my eyes gone green
Gimme more, gimme more, gimme more more more more more!

                             SONDRA
Something isn’t right here, something tells me
Something’s got us blinded, isn’t healthy
Something that is quite near, we’re forgetting
Something that is right here, with all of this shiney- NO!

[Stack three parts:]

1. FUZZO

Jewels, gems, a giant bone
Riches, countless, unknown
All that glitters, take it home with me!

2. PANGLA

Priceless tridents, Diamonds the size of islands
Feats of science - Fire breathing laser lions!
Eyes are widening, fantasize what’s mi-e-ii-e-ii-e-iiine

3. SONDRA

Something isn’t right here, something tells me
Something’s got us blinded, isn’t healthy
Something that is quite near, we’re forgetting
Something that is right here, NO NO NO NO!

Treasure madness has grasping at all we could ever want
But what we need is clarity and CALM
To focus on…

Guys, why are we here?

                            FUZZO
Diamonds!

                          PANGLA
Bottomless Croissant!

                           BLOOR
Bloor!

                          DANKENT
Vases!

                          SONDRA

No!  I mean, not what do we want from here - what are we looking for?  Why did we come this far?  What do we NEED?

                          FUZZO
Home

                          PANGLA
Family

                          BLOOR
Bloor

                          DANKENT
Vases?

                          SONDRA

Yes! Except for Dankent. That’s right!

Remember what we came here for: to save all we hold dear
And we need a ship to take us far from here!

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

THAT DARN DANKENT

Dankent is a real cool dude! Sure
Who’s covered in some mites and fleas…
But we love him from his greasy face
Right down to his advanced
Undiagnosed liver disease!

Cuz that’s our stinky Dankent!
We love our stinky Dankent!
Sells like he’s begun to ferment!
His health is on the descent!

He is not well, but well is what he means
And so he is a friend to me

Sure he’s unremarkable, his hope to help is farcical
And most of this is all his fault
But he’s the straight male lead that all of us agree
We real could’t do with, well, maybe couldn’t do without!

Cuz he’s our stinky Dankent!
His flatulence is frequent!
Not very intelligent!
But gentle, loving, well-meant
Bad at his job, but he tries, at least half the time
As a detective, defective, and should be fired
Has trouble breathing, just standing, it’s kinda wild

He is not well, but well is what he means
And so he is a friend to me!

Credits and Lyrics for Addendum 3 of Our Dumb Universe

starring:

Sorter - Alanna Saunders
Announcer - James B Kennedy
Bong - Emma Galvin
Beep - Kerry Ipema
Huphalumpagus - Rachel Flynn
Feltina - Christina Pumariega

written by Jonathan A. Goldberg
music by Matt roi Berger

recorded, mixed and edited by Martin Fowler

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

FLUFF AND FOLD MEDLEY

                               HUPHELUMPUGUS 

Fuzz fuzz my love
Off into adventure
I guess our time together’s at an end

                              FELTINA

Fuzz fuzz my love
I’m scared I think I blew it
I’d give anything to do it all again

                         HUPHELUMPHAGUS

No,
Hold my hand
Just hold my hand
Hold my hand
And we’ll face the end
Though we’ve no face to face it with
Cuz you try the best you can
Yeah you try the best you can
And I’ve loved the best I ever could have loved

                             FELTINA

Fuzz fuzz my love
My heart it would be breaking
If my heart were in my ankle, it would ache

                         HUPHELUMPHAGUS

Fuzz fuzz my love
Though we’ve no second chances
I can’t think of any changes I would make

Cuz you try the best you can
Stay alive the best you can
And then you die the best you can
Like here together, foot in hand

Yes, hold my hand
Just you hold my hand
Hold my hand
And we’ll face the light
Just as we’ve faced all - side by side…

Plush love
That’s you
Your heart
Beats true
And you give
And you live
With Plush Love
You gave
Yourself
To save
My felt
And you paid
What you paid
With Plush Love

                            FELTINA

We’re a bit worse for the wear
Our threads are thin and frayed, it’s true

                         HUPHELUMPHAGUS

And though we go, I know not where
I know I’m not afraid - I’m with you

                           FELTINA

Fuzz fuzz my love
I always did unravel with you near
Fuzz fuzz my love
So there’s nowhere that I’d rather be than here
Fuzz fuzz my love
If we were still whole and full today
Fuzz fuzz my love
What would you say?
What would you say?

                         HUPHELUMPHAGUS

I’d say get over here you big old foot

                          FELTINA

Are you telling me to… heel?

                        HUPHELUMPHAGUS

I could slap you for that

                          FELTINA

Yeah, and not much else

                       HUPHELUMPHAGUS

Oh, you want to see what this hand can do?

Hold my hand
Hold my hand

                      HUPHELUMPHAGUS / FELTINA

Hold my hand                         Fuzz fuzz my love, it’s off into adventure
Hold my hand                         It’s you and I together till the end
Hold my hand                         Fuzz fuzz my love, there are no second chances
Hold my hand                         But I would make no changes to our plans

                         BOTH

Because you try the best you can
Yes you try the best you can
Feel alive the best you can
Align your life with your best friend And yes you die the best you can
When you go…
Oh oh oh oh…
Plush love
Plush love
All that’s left
That’s enough

                      HUPHELUMPHAGUS

Say you will

                         FELTINA

I say I will

                        BOTH

For Plush Love

Credits and Lyrics for Episode 9 of Our Dumb Universe

starring:

Announcer - James B Kennedy
Feltina - Christina Pumariega
Huphalumpagus - Rachel Flynn
Beep - Kerry Ipema
Sondra - Lauren Lim Jackson
Dankent - Nathaniel Kent
Valborg - Emily Gardner Xu Hall
Pangla - Melissa Lusk
Fuzzo - Jared Loftin
Boop - Melissa Lusk
Bloor - Carl Howell
Null Ship - Jenni Putney
Null Trooper - Fatt Booger
Cuddle Cup Voice - Jenni Putney
Kvold - Happy Anderson

written by Jonathan A. Goldberg
music by Matt roi Berger

recorded, mixed and edited by Martin Fowler

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

JUMP, DUNK, AND WHALE!

                                   FUZZO

In the fields of Minnesota, August ’92
The greatest mall ever designed was set to open soon
With a cinnabon, an ice rink and rainforest cafe
Twas the peak of architecture both then and today

But someone was up to something
So made that he was jumping around!
The ghost called Spring Heeled Jack
Planned to tear this mall right back to the ground

Spring Heeled Jack’d been reading Marx for a non-credited course
And he got some big ideas he planned to test by force
But little did he know, two heroes happened to be
In attendance at the ribbon cutting ceremony

Forward for the Utah Jazz,
The Mail Man, also known as Karl Malone!
And with his Orca Dan,
Underwater main man Jacques Cousteu

Oh you know they’re gonna
Jump Dunk and Whale!
As Spring Heeled Jack unveiled himself to assail
The structure of the mall, our two heroes split the throng and prepared.

Well Jacques and Karl shared a look that said let’s go
And Jacques threw some ninja sea stars at that jumpy ghost
And then Karl grabs a basketball from who know where
He passes it to Dan before he takes to the air

A perfect Ally Oop
Dan’s pass a perfect swoop and a dunk Right on to Jackie’s head
That’s when that ghosty said “i’m sunk!”

Because they’re gonna
Jump Dunk and Whale
A dream team’s your means to prevail
They brought it to the post to send that springy ghost to jail

Yeah you gotta,
Jump Dunk and Whale
When you team up you just can’t fail
Gotta double team your troubles, get your power doubled to prevail!

Yeah you gotta,
Jump Dunk and Whale
When you team up you just can’t fail
Gotta double team your troubles, get your power doubled to prevail!

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

A COMPLICATED PLAN

                            VALBORG

Everyone listen close, let’s have another go
At heart this plan is simple-ly complicated
Eventually we’ll warp fold deep into Null space
But first we’ll make some major changes:

            PANGLA / FUZZO / HUPH / FELTINA / SONDRA

Switching it up ship wide
Slipping into disguise
Pitch a tent with sting lights

Circus ship we’ll look like
Truth they’ll never surmise
Catch the Null by surprise
Oh oh oh oh!

                            VALBORG

That’s right and then part two we use a magic act
Distract the Null from what we’re really doing
Dankent and Sondra will set up a net field trap
With lasers on a local moon

While Huph performs and Kvold enjoys
The net is shot and hits
Disabling the power to the ship

            PANGLA / FUZZO / HUPH / FELTINA / SONDRA

In the dark and chaos
Power loss is causing
Valborg will deposit
Drugs into their water
Fuzzo will spread Gossip
Pass out the narcotics
Ai Ai Ai Ai!

                            VALBORG
This plan has many parts and nothing must go wrong
If we miss a single step, we can kiss our butts so long
Every cog that’s in this clock, require laser focus and total calm

…

                            VALBORG

Once all the Null are drugged, we slip into phase 3
Bloor and Pangla sneak aboard the Null Treasure Ship
We all will follow, one by one, we’ll say we need
To find the loo and take a piss

The Fartknocker we’ll find and board
And speed out on our way!
Alive a free to head straight for the Brain!

                              ALL

This plan has many parts and nothing must go wrong
If we miss a single step, we can kiss our butts so long
If we can pull it off, they’ll sing our name in song

                VALBORG

So one more time, go:

              PANGLA / FUZZO / HUPH / FELTINA / SONDRA

Slipping into disguise
Circus ship we’ll look like
Felt and Huph do magic
Null are all distracted
Laser net is set, shot
Big ship is catch caught
In the dark and chaos
Valborg drugs their water
Fuzzo spread gossip
Hands out the narcotics
Excuse to use the potty
While their heads are foggy
Hop on the Fartknocker
Head off like a rocket!
Ah ah ah ah ah!

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

HE’S GOING DOWN

                            VALBORG
Just take a deep breath Val / Keep it under control
Things may seem darkest now, but - you never know
Just need a moment here / just need an open look
One well-placed hunting spear and his goose is cooked

                             SONDRA
The moment’s growing closer, please be still my beating heart
Just need to figure out a plan to take these jerk apart
Just need a moment and a moment’s all I hope to get
If this guy’s as fearsome as everyone says he is

                            VALBORG
Everyone here’s

                             SONDRA
Counting on me

                            FUZZO
I’ll make the move

                            FELTINA/HUPH
Set us all free

                            PANGLA
I’ll blow him a kiss! Maybe he’s cute!

                            BLOOR
Bloor - Bloor Bloor Bloor Bloor Blooooor

                           FELTINA/HUPH
Just take a deep breath

                            VALBORG
Just take a moment, breathe

                            FELTINA/HUPH
If I don’t take him down, that means defeat

                           VALBORG
If I don’t take him down

                           FUZZO
That means that evil wins

                           PANGLA
If I don’t kiss him maybe he’ll be sad and throw a fit

                          FELTINA/HUPH
The moment’s growing closer, please be still our beating hearts

                             SONDRA
Just need to figure out a plan to take these jerks apart

                             FUZZO
Just need to jump him before he can even blink an eye

                               ALL
If I don’t make a move, my friends will die
I’ll make my move / They count on me
I’ll be the hero / I need to be
He’s going down / I’ll set us free

…

                              ALL
I made my move / I tried to breathe
I met my match / We met defeat
Is this the end? / Now we must wait and see
Ah oh ah oh ah oh

Credits and Lyrics for Episode 3 of Our Dumb Universe

starring:

Announcer - James B Kennedy
Crogus - Nathaniel Kent
Aide - Christina Pumariega
Feltina - Christina Pumariega
Glorpo - Eryck Tait
Bloor - Carl Howell
Valborg - Emily Gardner Xu Hall
Fuzzo - Jared Loftin
Trogus Guard 1 - Milf Barfer
Trogus Guard 2 - James B Kennedy
Ship Computer - Jenni Putney
Jormund - Emily Gardner Xu Hall
The Atrocity - Daniel K Isaacs
Bongle Bingle - Jared Loftin
Lyman Keys - Janet Loafderp
Dankent - Nathaniel Kent
Sondra - Lauren Lim Jackson
Pangla - Melissa Lusk
Bogus - Maff Barger
Nupha - Kerry Ipema
Huphalumpagus - Rachel Flynn

written by Jonathan A. Goldberg
music by Matt roi Berger

recorded, mixed and edited by Martin Fowler

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

LULLYBY FOR TROGUS (FUR OR LESS REPRISE)

                           BOTH
Nighty night
Don’t sleep tight

                            VALBORG
When you awake your nightmare will begin

                           FUZZO
It really worked
I mean, of course it worked!
I really did it!  Fuzzo for the win!

                           VALBORG
Shh

                          FUZZO
Sorry!

                          BOTH
We made the plan and got them snoring
Side by side

                          FUZZO
My pride is soaring!

                               BOTH
Unlikely team up, perfect scheming
This dream team got the Trogus dreaming!

                          FUZZO
Best pal. c’mon, the world’s ours for taking

                             VALBORG
Enough with all this celebrating!
You we’re right, I owe that to you.
But step one’s done - on to step two.

So how do we do it?

                           FUZZO
Do what?

                            VALBORG
Get out of here and defeat the Trogus.

                            FUZZO
Take these pills, avoid detection!

                           VALBORG
No, we did that part.

                           FUZZO
And they fell asleep

                          VALBORG
Yes…

                           FUZZO
And then…

Best friends best friends now we’re best friends!
Something something save the world!

                            VALBORG
Fuzzo, that’s NOT a plan…

                          FUZZO
Oh, well, you know

                         VALBORG
What is step two of the plan?                          

                         FUZZO
Well, you know. Etcetera, etceteras…

                            VALBORG
Oh god you don’t have a PLAN

                         FUZZO
We can wing it!

                        VALBORG
I’m going to gut you like a piglet!

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

                       BOGUS
Sure you chafe at the chain
Protest you’re not lesser, but what’s in a name?
As long as you’re in your place, safe
To learn at the knee of a superior race

Fight all you will, that’s the thrill for us all
To watch little dumb dumbs try to evolve
My sympathies - oh, how it must burn
When one learns one’s place is to serve

In every direction, we have searched and we find
Lesser being’s possessing a lesser mind, lesser mind
Galactically speaking, you’re of poorer design
It’s just a foible of breeding with your lesser kind, lesser kind

It’s so quaint what you have
A cute little culture that isn’t half bad
But look at the facts as they appear
Look at my people, the comparison’s clear:

You’re nobly savage, but your brain is your traitor
Quite below average by the metrics we favor
See it our way because we can’t see it yours
To stoop so low would question our worth

We have made the decision to do our best to be kind
Provide supervision to your lesser minds, lesser minds
Give you labor, for propose, let you bast in our shine
We are benevolent handlers of your lesser kind, lesser kind

Lesser beings!
Lesser beings!

Now you beg, I laugh! Your chance has passed
Your failures are vast - your planet had crashed:
We ended your wars, we cleaned your shores
We fed your poor - and now you want more??

When I turn you fools in
I’ll make sure you suffer
They’ll finally see my greatness
No longer lesser than my br-OH

…That hurt.

                       NUPHA
That’s one way to shut him up.

                       SONDRA
You hit him with a pipe! He’s been knocked out.

                      NUPHA
Fight all you will - that’s the thrill; did he say?
Well I hope that he’s thrilled from this pipe to his brain.
And fight, yes indeed - til the day we are free.
The rebellion forever are weeeeeeee!

Condescension and blame, threats to dissect and divide
Is the common refrain of a lesser mind, lesser mind
Tyrants beware - where you assail and malign,
13You may be caught unawares by a lesser kind, lesser kind!

Lesser beings!
Lesser beings!

                     SONDRA, PANGA
Na na na na na na!
Na na na na na na!
Na na na na na na!
Na na na na na, na na na!
Na na na na na na!
Na na na na na na!
Na na na na na na!
Na na na na na, na na na!

__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/

                    SONDRA
Nowhere left but up now
Our hope is in the sky
Relay stations’s our destination!

Reconnect with my ladies
Run diagnosis, hack from inside
Once we’re in the system, we’ll disarm all the prisons
With Resistance forces, turning the tide!

Somewhere up there, hope is in orbit
All we need is waiting for us
The future’s here, we’re hurtling towards it

                   PANGLA
We’re off into an adventure!
We’re heading into the stars!
A broadcast to compel the masses to rebel!

I’ll tell everybody I love them
And free the people of planet Earth
Send them all a message from way up in the heavens
To fight off those oppressing our world!

Hope, hope, orbiting Hope! Oh-oh, oh-oh!
Hope, hope, orbiting Hope! Oh-oh, oh-oh!
Hope, hope, orbiting Hope! Oh-oh, oh-oh!
Hope, hope, orbiting Hope! Oh-oh, oh-oh!

                             SONDRA
Somewhere up there, hope is in orbit
The future’s here, we’re hurtling towards it
Launch the ship and set our course, it’s
Off to storm the Trogus fortress!

                         HUPHELUMPHAGUS
Somewhere up in the atmosphere
There I’ll find a way
Oooooo
Oooooo

Find and go to Tina
She’ll tell me everything is Ok

Everything is ok, everything is ok
Everything is ok, oh god I hope it’s ok

Way up there I’ll find a way
Make it right make it ok
The dark inside please go away
Oh oh oh oh oh oh

                  PANGLA
Hope, hope, orbiting Hope! Oh-oh, oh-oh!
Hope, hope, orbiting Hope! Oh-oh, oh-oh!
Hope, hope, orbiting Hope! Oh-oh, oh-oh!
Hope, hope, orbiting Hope! Oh-oh, oh-oh!

                             SONDRA
Somewhere up there, hope is in orbit
The future’s here, we’re hurtling towards it
Launch the ship and set our course, it’s
Off to storm the Trogus fortress!