#european elections

THE DEBATE

It should have been an easy re-election to Parliament. A well-known and well-respected gay male who had easily won in the previous election was facing a very mild, dull candidate for his seat. On the day of the televised debate, he was confident- until it was just the two of them on stage with only their microphones… His opponent suddenly became loud, witty, brash, and now had an uncanny ability to humiliate with his polished and aggressive words… it was a setup! But no matter how hard he tried to recover, he kept getting pounded on every argument- soundly defeated on each issue… Then during the final statements, he heard his opponent strike at the issue he had long thought was not an issue- or even one of his strong points: his sexuality… His opponent started referring to him as “flaming” and a “queen” - which left the studio audience laughing so hard. It was uncontrollable laughter- only dying down as his opponent lobbed even more insults at him- now boldly using the words “faggot” and “pervert”- and ending with a high-pitched “homooooo-sesh-ual”! As the laughter continued, he looked down at his pants, and realized he was now fully erect, and might be seen- and maybe that was causing additional laughter! But rather than risk his erection becoming fully apparent in his pants, he just ran off the stage- to even more jeers from his former constituents…
He ignored his staff and got in his car - racing home, and running in the house, and closing the door behind him…
He couldn’t believe what had just happened- humiliated on television, called names, laughed at… His political career was over that night- and to top it all off, he looked at himself in the hallway mirror. And what did he see? He was standing there without pants- for some reason, he had taken them off in the car… And he was erect… And so, to appropriately finish the most humiliating night of his life, he thought of his opponent and how he had thoroughly been conquered. He then grabbed his penis and furiously masturbated like he had never before… He started to cry- and then ejaculated… It was over. It was all over now.

A graffitied UKIP poster for the upcoming European elections for MEP representatives in England. Seen on the B1062 between Bungay and Beccles.

Somepolls are indicating that UKIP could enjoy a “landslide” victory in the 22nd May elections, with Nigel Farage’s party taking advantage of Euroscepticism and the perceived ineffectiveness of Britain’s mainstream political parties by offering a so-called “Common Sense” ‘populist’ protest vote against the British political establishment and the EU. A cornerstone of UKIP’s policies rest on tackling the perceived 'threat’ of “excessive immigration”, which the party claim is “crippling local services”.

UKIP’s anti-immigration stance has proved controversial though, with the party’s national billboard campaign in particular receiving lots of media coverage. The most unsettling of these billboard designs features an Orwellian-esque pointing finger accompanied by the legend “26 Million People in Europe are looking for work. And whose jobs are they after?”. Labour Party MP Mike Gapes branded the campaign “racist” and “xenophobic”, and accused UKIP of seeking “to win votes by whipping up animosity against foreigners living and working and contributing to this country.”

There have also been several allegations of sexist remarks attributed to UKIP members. The most high-profile incident concerned Godfrey Bloom’s mocking use of the word “sluts” to describe women attending a UKIP conference, which resulted in him quitting his position as a UKIP whip, though he remains an MEP and member of the party. UKIP treasurer Stuart Wheeler denied allegations of sexism after making a comment about women's “competitiveness” in relation to men.