#ex jw meme

At the memorial the lady to my left was someone who I had never met before, but she was near my age. She was really nice, and let me read along with her and use her songbook. While in a vacuum this was a wholesome interaction, in reality I was hoping to get away with texting my friends the whole time and I was VERY annoyed that I had to engage beyond passing around Jesus’ very strange skin.

I swear the memorial talk was even worse this year. 45 minutes of the same shit as every other year and the last 15 is dedicated to convincing you to do ‘do more’ for some guy name Jehobo or whatever

If jehovah didn’t want me to be queer then why did he make me a woman who loves boobs? Absolutely asking for disaster at that rate.

Mfw god demonizes female sexuality and also hates women

(image description: megamind saying “no bitches?”)

At least Jehovah will fix my teeth in the new system, right guys? ‍

Thinking about the fact that most everyone in my family was in an MLM and a religious cult at the same time for a while… Bro that’s practically two cults, pick a struggle.

I have decided I’m calling the November tradition my family has ‘Jehovah ChristGiving’, because it’s basically a combo of the two holidays.

Growing up, my grandparents taught me that Adam and Eve carried every gene and that that’s how all variations of humans came to be.

Now, I’m a middle school dropout who genuinely still doesn’t know how evolution works. But in retrospection, that claim sounds impossible and kinda fucking dumb.